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Something strange is happening

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

I was in Cleo today and bought a couple of items (http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....rmy-day-kr) and was pleased with them in the store. I was still a bit pleased when I took my pics for my K/R thread. But now I'm not nearly as pleased.

This isn't the first time this has happened - in fact, the last few times I shopped, I felt this way. Even in the store, most of what I tried on made me go "meh". Truth be told, I think I may have even felt "meh" about the dress and trench.

I'm not sure why this is happening. I have a few theories, so please, if you'll indulge me. I'm wondering if:

a) I'm very happy with my current wardrobe and really don't need anything new
b) We're about to change seasons soon and I always get a wee bit "lost" at that time
c) The weight loss/health/fitness journey I'm currently on is making me confused about my body/size
d) I'm about to have some sort of style evolution

Would love to hear your thoughts on this. And should I send return the items I bought until I have some clarity?

Dressing

20 replies

Latest reply was from

Kristin L

Veteran

I understand what you're saying. Until very recently I was confused about what I liked and what I didn't and was bouncing back and forth on things until it was too late to return it or it'd be out of stock by the time I realized it would have worked for me. It can take a bit of time for the fog to lift and for the little light to pop on.

And yes, if you're not happy with what you bought, send it back.

Caro in Oz

Veteran

If it was me it would be all of the above:)
Sounds like you are just getting pickier I wouldn't keep anything I wasn't sure about.
Could be a seasonal thing too.

Thistle

Veteran

Take it back. You are never happier with a piece as you are when you first bring it home. If you don't love them now, you won't later. With your fab wardrobe, you don't need to settle.

Could be any of the above or all of the above. Give yourself some time to think it through, and in the meantime, don't let yourself keep anything les than. 9.5.

Kyle

Veteran

I think you are honing in on your style, becoming more discerning, and less willing to settle than ever before. And why should you? You have a great wardrobe and may be buying out of habit or for the "feel good" effect it can sometimes have. But then the thrill wanes and reality sets in. All quite normal, I would say, and something many of us have experienced (and continue to).

Interestingly, I felt a similar "thrill" when I returned a few things this weekend that just did not measure up. I enjoyed seeing that money go back in my account, so maybe I can put it toward something TRULY FAB when it comes along.

Sveta

(website)

Veteran

Shannon, happens to me all the time - that's why I have 75+% return rate with what I buy. I think your style quotient has skyrocketed lately and you became more picky - and this is a good thing. You do have a gorgeous wardrobe so you have all rights to be picky. Also I think your style is evolving, we have noticed this lately.
I would say that if you have a tiny doubt about your purchase it is not a 10 and should go back. Trust your style instinct!

MNsara

Veteran

Good advice above! All I want to say is "when in doubt - don't"

That has been proving pretty useful for me lately, so maybe you too?

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Echoing the others. You have brilliant style, Shannon, and you ARE evolving!!! Also, your nose for quality has gone way up of late. You are less willing to settle.

If you have any doubts, take it back. I order a fair bit and send it back, like Sveta says. And I'm starting to be like Kyle. For every dollar I get back in returns, I look forward to the fab item that will one day be in my closet because I waited patiently for it.

I also think as your size/ shape changes you WILL go through a period of confusion about that. I know I did - and two years later I am finally feeling a bit more confident about what shape I am and how to dress it. Took a really long time.

catgirl

Veteran

This is happening to me as well. I just returned several items that should be "me" but instead feel "meh". I am attributing it to newly high standards and to a better sense of what will become a workhorse. For example, the ombre skinnies seemed obviously within my style, but the fit and material were not up to par for me. So I see this development for you as a positive thing - you are refining and honing!

Plus I honestly think those of us who live in long winters get restless - it's probably good that we have the sense to return things we don't really love. I feel BORED if I don't at least browse and try stuff on consistently, whether I return or not.

rae

(website)

Veteran

All of the above?

I am having similar issues, Shannon. Even if I love the item right away, sometimes letting it sit at home with the tags on gets me to a place where I want to return. Those ombre jeans that I really wanted to keep I now feel won't be a good spring pant, so I'm sending them back... I think that as the seasons (and body parts) change we naturally want to evolve, and as we get a clearer picture of the next stage in evolution, certain items get eliminated?

Anonymous

It's probably all of the reasons you give, but I know this time of year I have to be especially careful not to shop just for something different because I'm bored with what's been worn all winter. Problem is, it gets a wear or two, then the weather turns too hot. By next winter it's not looking fresh either. Angie is right. It's probably best to shop at the beginning of the season.

CocoLion

(website)

Veteran

What Joy said makes a lot of sense. Also, we all try to be PPP here, so return if you are in doubt.

Carla

Veteran

Probably all of what you identified. Return what is 'meh' and call it research. You've learned something about yourself. I shop almost every week, but I haven't bought anything in 3 months.

Deborah

Veteran

Shannon, I haven't read the above comments yet, but I have to say infeelmexactly the same at the moment. I believe I have become much pickier and harder to please. I am also recognizing quickly when I pick something up that I already have in my closet. The change of season definitely impacts me, I have put on some weight and that is not helping, and I am very happy with what I have (left) in my closet. The other issue door me is that every store seems to have the same things, very little variety and I'm bored by it. I have been trying to find something for a wedding for weeks and have not bought a thing:(

Ingunn

(website)

Veteran

I agree with the others. You are only becoming more picky because you are more certain of what you like. You could also be anticipating spring by now - simple as that. I know I do!

jenanded

Veteran

Agree with the others - you look smashing. And sounds like you have enough clothes in your wardrobe to go out well dressed. A squillion more things will continue to hit the stores.Enjoy what you have, keep having fun looking and keep on looking fabtastic Shannon until the next worthy things come along...

rute

Veteran

OMG that outfit is fabulous! My guess is that you are about to have some sort of style evolution!
I have outfits I bought two years ago (the bombshell type, black fitted dresses) that are lovely (I know they're perfect for my body type), I receive a lot of compliments and I don't feel fabulous because thay don't fit into my current style!

krishnidoux

Veteran

Lots of meaningful advice above... just wanted to chime in that I immediately wanted to add one theory: you are getting stricter with which clothes you actually really want, like Kyle said. Your style is stellar (even with the new pieces shown). I think you may be getting to the chore of yourself with this, you are getting to know yourself better through this process, and yourself is telling you something! Good for you to be listening!

Freckles

Veteran

Could it be that the new style trends are just not suiting you or your goals?

I am not a fan of the oversized slouchy trend because it does not suit my bodyshape or my rubric. Finding it difficult to buy things that do as the other options are not what suits it either and what is available can be too conservative for the ever conservative me.

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

Soooooo much relief to hear others in the same boat! You've all given me much to think about.

I tried on the dress and trench again this morning and compared it to how I felt in the outfit I wore to work today and came up with something that was a bit of a revelation to me: the dress and trench are missing a bit of "edge" (for lack of a better term) and that seems to have become important to me in my style evolution. It's not that I can't edge these items up with accessories and footwear, but I just wasn't feeling them. And that's ok.

I've adopted the slouchy and oversized look and have surprised myself by not only really liking it, but making it work for my shape and size (at least I hope I'm making it work - lol!). I'm very much into combining feminine with masculine in my outfits these days and want to continue to explore this. I still intend on wearing dresses and retro inspired pieces but want EVERY. SINGLE. ITEM in my wardrobe to make me smile.

I think I'm practicing PPP and I'm kinda proud of that. And when I look at my purchases over the last year, I have indeed become much pickier about what comes into my closet. Now PPP does not necessarily equate with price - right now my faves are my tweed Sears trousers at $30 and my recently thrifted Kut from the Kloth jeans at $8 - but picky in terms of fit, quality and versatility within my wardrobe.

I'm learning, I'm growing, I'm having fun - and I can't thank you all enough for coming along with me for the ride

Anonymous

Awesome Shannon, and I'm glad I got to read your comments. I agree and I see it as either a honing or an evolving. In any case, I give myself permission to return things that don't hit that marker even if I can't articulate a reason. Sure it's good to be able to figure out why, for future reference, but sometimes that takes a while to figure out.

I checked out a HUGE coffee table book at the library the other day. It's called Fashion: The Definitive History Of Costume and Style (DK Smithsonian). I could barely carry it under one arm it's so heavy. Anyway, going through the book and really studying the styles and how they evolved has been so interesting and educational. By reading about the origins of different looks, especially in the last century or so, I got a new understanding of what I like and don't like, and what certain terms actually mean (like Romantic) and what details contribute to that look. Now I have a better idea of what I want to go for and what I want to pass up.

I went shopping yesterday with all of this new found knowledge and it didn't surprise me at all that I came home empty handed. I think the more we evolve, the pickier we get--which is a good thing--but the "Honeymoon Period" of being ectatic with almost anything new is over.