Rachylou, I had never heard of "kith". I LOVE that word.

IMO, it is a close business relationship that has been fostered for years. One based on good will and I think it is important in business to to be fair and to communicate. It is a "partnership" if you will.

It's a good word, isn't it?

It's interesting about the stylist thing. It's an emotionally close relationship. It's intimate... this person runs their hands through your hair. But it's not the kind of close, financially intertwined relationship where the client makes the supplier build factories and install million dollar equipment.

Unless, perhaps, you put your stylist on retainer and demand they drop whatever they're doing and fly to you at the drop of the hat. That kind of client, yes... definitely owes the stylist something. Like a severance package.

So interesting to know that this is something that is tough for many of us!

Whew! Sounds like you got it all figured out!

(I just want to add that I love Zapotee's grandma! She sounds like a great woman to have as a guide through life.)

Such interesting comments! I will say that the salon owner is all over the situation... She suspended him and wouldn't let him come back until he'd been to rehab for two weeks. Believe me she is watching him like a hawk and if there is ever a next time (coming to work impaired) he will be gone.

Great point about false intimacy. I think "close acquaintances" about covers it, and I do feel like calling him was the right thing to do.

It's just sad.

Well done MaryK!
It was hard but you handled it so graciously:)
Have a great trip.

YAY !! I am so glad it is resolved. I do hope that he does get the help he needs.

( Rachylou - yup, GREAT word. I will have to work it into dinner conversation tonight with my kith .....)

Your perspective is very interesting to me, as are your points. Yes, installing multi-million dollar equipment is a very different "parntership" but no more important, IMO. I think that for professional women, in particular, one's hair is almost like a million dollar "installation"/investment. Just like men in "high" places depend on bespoke for a certain look. I think that unless one is John Mayer, showing up for work unkempt would be a problem. One works with people just the same. If someone earns $50k a year for 20 years, that is a million dollars and he/she better not have scraggly hair. One depends on one's look/appearance as part of the work milieu and hair is such a huge part of that for women. ( Though I am not sure this has anything to do with Maryk's hairdresser anymore LOL !! ) When I worked, my look was very important so the people around me helping me attain that were too ( tailor/hairdresser), they had an investment in my "success" , if you will. ( I used to work with a woman who was FABULOUS at her job and her customers LOVED her. But she wore black sneakers and wore her hair in a pony tail with flyaways all over the place. The customers didn't care, but management did. They gave her three WRITTEN warnings that if affected the company image. Finally, she was put on a two week notice. She got a GREAT haircut and comfy shoes. And the people at Neiman Marcus became instrumental to her. )

Anyway, I enjoyed your perspective AND especially, your vocabulary lesson ! : )

Image is definitely important. One of my bosses made me buy a car. Not that my job was on the line, but he whined a lot, lol.

In that light, you know... forget disloyalty, stylists are vastly underpaid...

We have maybe talked this out but I had a strange hair experience ay my present salon. Tom was doing my hair and abruptly left, I was crushed. But I was quickly given to Dean, whom I love. Then just as abruptly Tom came back and the first time I saw him, I was in Dean's chair, covered in foils.

I cringed, we all said hello and the receptionist told me not to worry, it was Tom's problem. It all worked out and I was the most stressed. I think clients moving around is the norm in hair salons.

Well done, Mary K. Gracious behavior is never a mistake.

You were very gracious MaryK and handled it exactly right. So glad it worked out.

And your before and after hair, OMG, what a transformation! You look like your own daughter now!

In my book gracious and respectful is always the way to go. A personal exchange, in person or on the phone, always wins out in my book. So glad that this crisis is over with and that you're on your way on the trip of a lifetime. Take care.