Rant! and: Please help me dress my apple-y body - YouLookFab Forum

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Rant! and: Please help me dress my apple-y body

JuliaInGermany

Hi all!
I am so frustrated with my attempts to buy a new wardrobe, I could sit down and cry... Or just give up this whole style thing and live in baggy jeans and boxy t-shirts. But I fear, that wouldn’t make me happy either.

[Edit: I'll better delete my long rant or nobody will read this loooong post. lol]

The thing is that I hardly have anything to wear anymore. My body changed so much during the last pregnancy that I don't fit into anything from before. And it's not only added weight but a different body type, too. I have always been a rectangle (an underweight one for the most part of my life). Now I'm suddenly an apple with slim and rather long arms and legs (my mother has the same shape and calls it "the ladybug"). Plus, I have a very small head/face, and I feel like I look oddly misproportioned. Every time I catch my reflection in a mirror or a shop window I feel like: Whoa, this is how I look like? My self-image has not yet caught up with reality.

So, please help me get a new wardrobe. I read Angie's tipps on dressing an apple and probably need to read them again and again. But perhaps you can give me a few hints, too. My most pressing questions are these:

What kind of top to wear? I love button-downs and Angie says they can look very good on an apple-shape. But with a baby I constantly have spit-stains on the shoulder and often need to change my top at midday (and sometimes again in the late afternoon). If I average two tops a day, that's a lot of ironing to do! On the other hand I feel that knit tops or t-shirts show off my lumps and bumps at the waist, so I'm not happy with those either. What to do?

How do I show off my slim legs without looking totally out of proportion? I like skinnies but I feel that they make me even more top-heavy (or front-heavy).

and finally: Can you recommend some basics for an apple? I really need to start all over with a new wardrobe. I have one pair of straight leg jeans (Levi's 501), two straight-leg casual trousers for summer and a few short sleeved button-downs. I also have two straight skirts, one in a microcheck and one in denim (but not a classic denim skirt shape). I also have shoes and boots and I hope that my coats still fit. I need clothes that are practical for a nursing mom (no dresses and everything needs to be washable). Style-wise I like classic pieces, but not necessarily in neutral colours. I like Kristine’s style here on the forum. Where do I start to build a wardrobe for autumn and winter?

Thanks for reading this far! I know it's a lot to ask, but I would really appreciate any and all comments and tipps.

Body Type

17 replies

Latest reply was from JuliaInGermany

Louise

Veteran

1) (((hugs)))
2) How long since your last baby was born? could be your body will change shape again
Do you feel up to posting a bodyshape piccie? just to get clarification x

Queen Mum

Veteran

I think you need a nice tall glass of wine after all that shopping stress
I really don't have any words of wisdom. I would think that once you acquire some jeans that you like you might feel a whole lot better. I also totally understand about the whole button down thing and spitting up babies. Can you try to find some woven tops that are more of a mesh type material? (like the sweet pea tops) These type will smooth over any bumpies and don't need ironing.

chewyspaghetti

Veteran

Big hugs Pregnantmom!

I think Queenie has a great idea about finding a good pair of jeans as a start- that will make you feel a million times better. For tops, I would look for woven tops that skim your body- they are the happy medium between tees and button down shirts. Here are a few examples:

http://tinyurl.com/22mctu5

http://bananarepublic.gap.com/.....pid=769806

http://www.jcrew.com/womens_ca...../29885.jsp

bj1111

Veteran

you just need to release your inner babe, which i'm positive you have in you.

as an apple, you have fabulous legs, you just need to keep the top proportional to the bottom half.

wash and go dresses or skinny jeans with tops that skim the body are a place to start.

khris and kim have great ideas.

ps: it's just clothing...think of refurbishing your wardrobe as a great way to finally get the clothing you deserve (even it has to be wash and wear for now).

shana

Veteran

PG, it hasn't been that long since you have had your baby, no? I would be wary of making an investment in a brand new wardrobe right now. Especially since you are still breast-feeding, you still have loads of hormones swimming around in your system and believe me, your body will continue to change! Some people loose weight while bf and some don't - I was one of the don't. Plus, my bust since didn't normalize for a good 6-9 months AFTER I stopped bf (around 11 months or so).

I know is sucks feeling like you have nothing to wear but invest in a few key pieces that will carry you through the next few months and will make you feel great. I am currently very appley due to a weight gain. I wear my bootcut & straight/skinny jeans with with flowy woven tops anchored by short sleeve or 3/4 sleeve cardigans. The cardigan adds some definition without clinging to every bump like a knit top alone would. Instead of the cardigan you can also do a structured jacket. Skirts are great because they don't constrict like pants do. Maybe you can invest in a pencil denim skirt - it is very versatile and would look great now with flats and later with boots & tights. The messy scarf that Angie blogged about recently (http://youlookfab.com/2010/08/.....or-dressy/) is a great way to disguise the tummy and add some color & pattern to an outfit.

Hang in there! It will get better and you will find your mojo again!

Michelle

(website)

Veteran

Hugs, Julia! Body change stress can be so tough to deal with!
I really hope Marianna chimes in here. She's an apple who never wore dresses until very recently, so she's a pro at dressing your shape in separates. Perhaps her blog could serve as inspiration in the meantime? http://absolutelyapple.blogspot.com

When wearing your skinnies, where do your tops hit on you? Would it help you feel more proportional to wear tops a little longer? Silky or woven tunics may help you feel more pulled together, since they could balance your proportions and float over the areas you're self-conscious about.

Ruchi

Hi pregnantmom,I too was struggling with this issue.My younger one has turned 5 mnths but I still have babyfat on the tummy.As Queenie and chewyspagetti suggested get a good pair of jeans.I bought a pair of skinnies to show off the slim legs.A pair of denim pencil skirt or A-line skirt is also a good bet.I picked up a printed wrap dress which accentuates the waist.Now for the tops,some excellent suggestion have been given above but I personally prefer tops which are knit with side ruching.They camouflage the tummy really well and look like I have lots oodles of weight whereas infact I havent lost any.For simple tops,I simply create ruching by adding folds around the tummy area rather than stretching the top till the hips.I am not sure if I am clear.will chime in a while after putting the babies down for a nap.

marianna

Veteran

Hi pregnantmom!

I'm an apple and somedays I am still figuring out the best way to dress myself, but here's what I've learned so far:

- When buying tops, make sure they are not clingy. I feel extremely uncomfortable when a top hugs my belly. Blouses and wovens are better for us. Honestly, I've never picked up an iron in my life and I don't walk around looking disheveled either. There are some wovens that don't require ironing, especially when you hang dry. Sometimes I will wear a graphic tee, but to avoid tummy cling I will add a top layer. A jacket helps to streamline you, or for warmer weather a sleeveless vest looks great. Also, make sure you're buying tops that are long enough! Wearing a too-short top really throws off the proportions.

- I know you want to show off your slim legs, so you should embrace skinnies/straight leg pants! The key here is to wear a long enough top (tunic length usually) and make sure it skims past your midsection. When I wear skinnies I make sure my top has volume.

- Dresses and leggings are truly your best friend. The most comfortable outfit ever! Jersey dresses skim past your lumps and bumps, and leggings allow you to move comfortably and chase after the kiddos.

I'm not a MOTG but my lifestyle is pretty casual. My basics are: good jeans, walk shorts, soft dresses, leggings, voluminous blouses, cardigans, jackets, and a couple buttondowns. Mix some fun necklaces and ballet flats in the mix, and you have a good foundation.

You can check out my blog for some visuals. There are some outfit disasters in the mix (when I first started my blog) but I'm slowly figuring out how to dress better -- as documented by my pictures!

http://absolutelyapple.blogspot.com/

JuliaInGermany

Great advice so far, thank you!

Louise, thanks for the hugs. I actually took pictures today because I wanted help in determining my body shape. But when I uploaded them to my computer it was sooo obvious that I'm an apple, that I decided there's no need to post them. I'm not really comfortable with sharing them at the moment...

Queenie, a glass of wine would be lovely. Will have to wait for this until I wean (sp?) my baby boy, though. Only 8 or 9 more month, haha. I'm not sure I can buy Sweat Pea tops here, but I'll have a look around for something similar. They sound like a good idea.

Chewy, thanks for the suggestions. I especially like the first two shirts with the ruffles and pleats. I'm sure Queenie and you are right, I really need a great pair of jeans.

bj1111, my "inner babe" is on vacation at the moment I think. Or perhaps she got lost between feeding, changing diapers and doing laundry. Hopefully she'll come back to me soon. Dresses and skinnies sound like a good idea. Never thought about this, but the jeans should give enought tummy-coverage for nursing.

shana, it's only 3 month and I'm with you that my body will probably continue to change. I'm keeping my "old" clothes in the hope that someday they'll fit again (and hopefully won't look outdated by then). But for now I need a basic wardrobe that fits and flatters an apple. I have already ordered a denim skirt which hopefully will fit ok. I'll also keep an eye out for scarves, that's a good idea.

Michelle, thanks for the link. I think the length of my tops is ok, but now that I'm thinking about it, it's probably the fact that they are wide and banded. It makes me look like a balloon.

Ruchi, I know what you mean by creating ruching on simple tops. That's a good idea, as I can't seem to find any ruched tops at the shops I have been browsing.

Marianna, thanks for your long response. I really like your blog and you are a great dresser, I think. I'll have to try to wear my button-downs without ironing, too. I should probably wash them together with my husbands shirts instead of throwing them in with jeans and everything else and let them get wrinkled. I'll also have a go at jersey dresses and leggings. That sounds comfy and easy to care for.

You have all been such a great help! Now I'll be searching the interwebs for items you suggested and will post some "keep or return" posts soon, I hope.

If any of you have more suggestions, please keep them coming.

AJ

Veteran

Pregnantmom, I know it seems like a ways off, but you will lose some of that appleness in time. In the meantime, let's try to find you something you can feel good in right now.

I am one of those people who gains weight first in the tummy. Even a two pound gain, makes me look like I'm pregnant. I find slightly loose straight or slight a-line dresses really help me feel better on bloated days. I don't have any store pics to show you, but here are two from my outfit album:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/w.....168731522/
This came from Old Navy a couple of years ago and I like how the ruffle placket and the print toward the bottom, take the attention away from the tummy area. Also, above the knee lengths also draw attention to legs instead of tummy. If you like, you could add cropped leggings that hit right below the knee to feel a bit more covered.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/w.....804070286/
This plaid dress came from JCPenney this summer. They don't have it online but they might still have it in their stores. It is in the junior section. I got it in a large because I wanted the looser fit. I like how the plaid runs in a different direction on the sides which is visually slimming. The studs on the neckline and the ruffles on the bottom are also a nice distraction.

I also find that a long summer weight scarf, tied in a simple knot and the ends hanging in front of the tummy, makes me feel a bit better. Maybe some colorful inexpensive ones at Walmart or Target can also help with the spit-up issue?
My usual armor of a scarf to shield the front and a jacket or cardigan to shield the side view. LOL!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/w.....462653137/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/w.....733946694/

Even without the jacket/cardi, the scarf still works as a distraction along with a dark top that skims the body and shorts or skirt to show off the legs.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/w.....783430001/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/w.....848163623/

In general, use prints or accessories to distract the attention.

Hope that helps get you started. You got some great tips and advice from others already.

Hugs to you! I think we all have apple days or months and can totally relate to how you are feeling. Keep us posted on your shopping finds.

JuliaInGermany

AJ, thanks for taking the time to answer and adding some photos. That helps a lot. I love your plaid dress! The point about drawing attention away from the waist to the neckline or the bottom is really good.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

More hugs from me and don't worry! If you can manage a recent picture post baby, that would help.

crwilson

Veteran

I'm in the same boat, and I know how frustrating it is. I think I made a post a few months ago that was a whole lot like yours. I promise that a few months really does make a big difference. It's so hard when your body is going through so many changes, and like you, I'm still very apple-y. I'm apple-y to begin with, but now it's even more pronounced. (Ruchi - it sounds like our babes are about the same age.)

Right now, I think that tunic tops and leggings are super comfy, still look pulled together, and skim right past all the lumps and bumps. I'm going to try to find a pair of ponte pants for a little bit more coverage for the fall, and I'm in love with a number of the Boden tunics. I second the idea of Sweet Pea tops if you can find them. They are the most flattering tops in the world and somehow hide all sorts of things while not looking shapeless. I also try to add cardigans and jackets when it's a little cooler for definition. Another idea is to update your accessory wardrobe - use necklaces and great earrings to draw attention to your lovely face. Scarves are great, but can be kind of complicated with a baby I find.

greenglove

(website)

Veteran

Wow, these suggestions are so great, I just wanted to add that your body will likely change and please try not to be so hard on yourself! Posting pictures will really help. Not all apple shapes are the same and it would help to see your particular proportions. Sweet pea tops I think are quite flattering on apples. Am I right??

JuliaInGermany

Angie, thanks. Ok, here are my pictures:
http://s738.photobucket.com/al.....y%20shape/
The password is ylf2010.

crwillson, this season I have seen ponte pants for the first time here (I think we might be slow adopters). I'll give them a try, they sound comfy and a bit more "dressed" than leggings if you know what I mean.

greenglove, aren't ylflers the best? So many good ideas and helpful hints.

Sally

Veteran

Hi
I have an apple figure too and your body does change after a baby. I can get quite slim but my stomach still sticks out and I have very little waist. I wear blouses buttoned down but not tucked in and that seems to work. Also fitted but not tight v neck tops. I find dresses that are fitted on the bust but skim a bit at the stomach are good...wrap tops and dresses are good and I have heaps. I have lots of tops to wear with leggings and I think leggings are fantastic with all kinds of boots.
I find I can wear all kinds of jeans as far as the leg shape goes..its just I have to be careful about my waist. I also find I can wear skirts above the knees.
I also find support knickers (or the bridget jones mummy knickers ) good for those special occasions you want to look flatter and more streamlined round the tummy

JuliaInGermany

Sally, thanks for your answer. I just saw some wrap tops in many different colours online, and I'll give them a try. I also have some support knickers, but it has to get cooler before I can wear them.

I'm starting my post-partum gymnastics class on monday and hopefully that will help me flatten my tummy a bit.