Pregnant with baby #3 - YouLookFab Forum

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Pregnant with baby #3

Sara L.

Veteran

I just wanted everyone to know why my style and shape is probably going to go through some changes soon.

I'm about 13 weeks pregnant and now that I'm past the first trimester I feel more comfortable talking about this. I'm trying not to feel old and decrepit. Because I'm over 35, all my paperwork says I'm AMA which stands for Advanced Maternal Age. I'm 39 right now and will turn 40 in the fall so was already having some issues with getting older. This isn't helping things.

Also, I've had several people ask if this was planned and if I'm having a third baby to get a girl (I have two boys age 5 and 7). What odd questions! Do they assume no one wants a third kid? Or that everyone can plan exactly when to get pregnant? Or that everyone wants the gender they don't have? I love my boys and to be honest, I don't really care what this one ends up being (neither does DH).

I'm almost out of my normal clothes except things that are sort of stretchy. My goal this weekend is to pull out all my maternity clothes and also evaluate if there are any non-maternity items that might work for some or all of this pregnancy. My other two kids were born in Feb and this one is due in Oct so most of my maternity clothes are for the wrong season.

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38 replies

Latest reply was from ManidipaM

pil

Veteran

Congratulations, Sara! I hope this pregnancy is incredibly uneventful and that your little fellows just love their new little sibling.

ClaraT

Veteran

Sara, the things that people say to pregnant women never fail to astound me. I learned to smile and say, "Why do you ask/say that?" which generally allows people to realize the inappropriateness of their question/comment without being too mean.

And...congratulations! You two older boys must be excited (and they are old enough to be extremely helpful once baby arrives).

rachylou

Veteran

People are so weird and delusional. About everything. My neighbor itemizes the delusional things people say to her every day. I once had a girl yell at me that if she wanted to believe corn and tomatoes came from Europe that it made it true. And then there was this guy I knew who believed women should stay at home in the kitchen, barefoot and pregnant, but he didn't know how he felt about being the sole breadwinner. I was like, yeah, let me know when you figure that one out. Haha!

Get your maternity clothes out! It will be fun to go through them!

Makrame

Veteran

Congratulations! Best wishes for an easy pregnancy and a beautiful baby!

rachylou

Veteran

Oh yes, one more thing. Remember: you're too young in your 20s and too old past 30. There was never any hope anyways... hehe.

Sara L.

Veteran

Oh, rachylou, you're funny! And absolutely right about the ages for having babies.

My kids are excited, or as excited as they can be expected to be for an event that won't happen for another 6 months. I had an ultrasound yesterday and my oldest said the pictures looked "cute". I thought that was pretty funny since personally I think ultrasound photos are sort of creepy.

Anonymous

Congrats on your happy news!!!

Echo

Veteran

Congratulations! People really have no sense about being polite; sometimes the things said to a pregnant woman are just appalling. When I had my third everyone assumed that I was only pregnant in order to "get" the gender I didn't already have. Like with you, they seemed perplexed when I said (honestly, too) that it truly didn't matter and that we would be as happy with a boy as with a girl.

I wish you a happy and healthy pregnancy!

Anonymous

Congratulations Sara! I only have the one child, a son (problems conceiving, IVF etc) and I didn't have him till I was nearly 40, so IKWUM about an older mum. I hate the terms health officials use. But hey It's so exciting and I'm so happy for you.

Anonymous

Congratulations! I hope babby is well and you are feeling good too! Your boys will be so excited!

goldenpig

(website)

Veteran

Congratulations, Sara! So excited for you! YAY YAY YAY!!!! I hope you and baby are doing well. Your sons must be so excited! Either way, boy or girl, they'll be so happy! Best wishes for a happy and healthy pregnancy!

I'm right where you are--39 and just had my third, turning 40 this summer. I totally know what you mean about the comments and assumptions. Everyone assumed that since we had a girl and a boy that we were done, because why would you have a third if you already had one of each? And I also peeked at my chart at my first prenatal visit with #3 and it said "Elderly multigravida." OMG! I'm not 90 years old yet! I felt like waving my cane at them, LOL!

Good luck with the closet re-evaluation! I think you may find more in your closet that will work than you think, and supplement with your old maternity clothes and maybe a few select maternity and sized up/stretchy non-maternity purchases. Don't worry! I panicked initially, but it turned out to be not such a big deal. I just packed up all my maternity clothes and sent them to my cousin who is expecting...if I had known I would have sent some to you too!

Can't wait to see your maternity WIW's! Please post pics of your cute baby bump! Congrats again!

Tina

Veteran

Wishing you good health and a continued uneventful pregnancy. There are many women having children at your age. We can't all plan our families, some do and that is fine, but there are many that cannot. A child is a blessing and I believe they have anti aging abilities:-) There are few things more soothing than having a baby run their hands over yours.

Raisin

Veteran

Yay, congrats! You had mentioned this on another thread, so I thought it was open discussion, so sorry if I talked about it when I shouldn't have. You look fantastic!

I know what you mean about the odd questions. I just had boy #2 and people are always asking of we will try for a girl. I always say no. We are perfectly happy with 2 boys and if we did ever have a third I would be very happy with another boy. And they look at me like, yah right! Lol, I guess people can't understand that a woman can be completely happy without a daughter. I love my boys to death.

Well good luck to you, congrats and I hope you have a happy, healthy baby boy or girl!

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

Congratulations Sara - very happy for you and your family! People do say the oddest things, but sometimes I think it's just because they don't know what to say and they are just trying to be friendly and keep a conversation going, you know? Then their foot ends up in their mouth. lol. I'm sure I've done it.

Caro in Oz

Veteran

Congratulations Sara that is great news:)

Sara L.

Veteran

Raisin - I wasn't keeping it a secret but I hadn't really announced it and there was some confusion on a past post. I thought I should make sure everyone knew to prevent future confusion.

Goldenpig - too funny! Elderly?! That's awful. This is the stage of dressing for pregnancy that I don't like at all. I don't really have a bump, just a thicker middle that makes it look like I've gained a few pounds. My regular clothes are starting to not fit, but I can't wear maternity clothes either.

catgirl

Veteran

Congratulations! Even though I pried ahead of your announcement. Am thrilled and know you will find lots of maternity inspiration here.

Debora

Veteran

Congratulations, Sara! I was 39 when I had my son and he has been such a blessing. I truly believe he has kept me young at heart. It's hard to believe that he is 18 now. Ignore the rude questions and enjoy every minute of your pregnancy. Wishing you all the best. I am thrilled for you!

Thistle

Veteran

Congrats! Such a fun and exciting time!

No worries on the AMA. I was marked as that all through my first and only pregnancy. It means you get a few more tests, and because you are AMA, your insurance can't squak. Doctors hover more as their risk goes up, but lots and lots of ladies are AMA these days! Way, with people getting married older, and women wanting to establish themselves in their careers before having babies, it was bound to increase the avg age of having children.

The OB I go to actually said the average age of women having their first child in their practice was 35 now. So, the average age in their practice in AMA!

Some people don't realize what idiots they are. Everyone thinks you are supposed to have 2 children. No more, no less. Everyone thinks a third child is unplanned, and everyone keeps asking us when we are having our second. While the average American household is 2.1 children, that doesn't determine every household.

MsMary

Veteran

So exciting! Congratulations! Can't wait to see you rock your maternity style!!

Deborah

Veteran

Congratulations Sarah, what lovely news. Please try not to stress over the age thing. I had my one and only son when I was 37. I was considered high risk purely due to my age and there were no other health factors against me. I was offered additional test, amnio and the like and I chose not to do them.

I spent my years prior to motherhood being quizzed on why we didn't have children and to be followed with when are we having another one, and how can we deny our son a sibling! You just have to let it go. People are sometimes thoughtless and insecure.

Im so excited for you.

Diana

Veteran

Congratulations, Sara!

I have always thought that if I had children, I would not start until I was at least 35. My mom had me at age 34, and then had my sisters at 36 and 40 (almost 41). The last was in 1986, you can imagine how much commentary she got about that back then when it was practically unheard of.

deb

Veteran

Congratulations!!!!!!

Anonymous

Congratulations Sara, that's such exciting news! I can't believe you were able to keep it quiet so long successfully. I wonder, does the pregnancy seem shorter when you keep it to yourself for the first trimester? If so, I should have tried that, but no, I've got too big of a mouth, lol! GP has some great posts from when she was at this stage. You should check out her blog if you haven't already.

Ingunn

(website)

Veteran

Congratulations! 39 is very common for having babies around here, even as the first one. I've also three children, and got the same stupid questions as you in my third pregnancy. Well, I never cared about the gender and I love that we have three girls! So does DH. Good luck with your wardrobe, I'm sure you will sort it out.

cheryle (Dianthus)

(website)

Veteran

Congratulations Sara.

People often say things without thinking. My mother assumes that every pregnancy is an "accident". She just can't wrap her head around the idea that many people love being parents and choose to have children. It is not your problem that others aren't able to think beyond their personal experiences or beliefs.

Enjoy the pregnancy and focus on what matters - your family.

Kristin L

Veteran

Congrats Sarah! I hope you have an easy and safe pregnancy.

I wonder if people's brains sometimes turn off when they talk to pregnant ladies? Or if people don't think about manners, like going up to a pregnant woman and trying to touch her stomach.

lyn67

Veteran

How wonderfull news! Congrats Sara!:-)

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Many congrats from me too! I know you'll have stunning maternity style

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