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Prefer unidentifiable clothes?

AM

Veteran

Again, I'm new here so I always feel like I am at risk of covering old ground for all you veterans. Apologies in advance if this is the case.

My style is somewhere in the modern, adrogynous, minimal vein. I was thinking about why I prefer minimal and I think it has something to do with wanting my clothes to be unidentifiable.

I also know that this is largely because I only love clothes that are in a very narrow range of color (black with neutrals) and styling (subtle elements of interest). But I was thinking this desire for unidentifyble clothes might also play into this. Anyone relate?

Dressing

38 replies

Latest reply was from AM

approprio

(website)

Veteran

Trying to understand what you mean by "unidentifiable". Could you elaborate?

I personally struggle with very minimal styling, mainly (I think) because I don't have the confidence in my unadorned physical appearance to pull it off all the time. But I do identify with the idea that my clothing shouldn't put me on a pigeonhole. I'd like to think there's a certain ambiguity in my presentation. It's fun if you can keep people guessing.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

By unidentifiable do you mean no obvious branding? We have talked about that, for sure. With most on the forum (I believe) falling into the "little to no obvious branding" camp and a few not minding it at all.

AM

Veteran

By unidentifiable I mean:

Hard to tell if it came out this year or 10 years ago
Not obvious as to which brand
Doesn't have a feature that someone might be able to say, "Oh, that is that ________ sweater I saw at Nordstrom."
Or simply, a piece that isn't in the mass market that you might see on other people

Thanks for making me think about this more.

Gaylene

Veteran

Welcome, AM!! And I think that's a great question to pose on the forum.

It's almost taken for granted, all too often, that we want our clothes to be noticed and admired by others. Certainly retailers who like to put their logos on everything would like us to think that getting noticed is important. And many, if not most, bloggers build their reputation and readership on traffic-stopping outfits.

But I think a good case can be made for wearing clothes that "disappear" so the emphasis is on the person, instead of the clothes themselves. I also think that more than a few of us like to blend into our surroundings at times--at least judging by the number of times people ask for help on putting together a travel wardrobe for Paris that will not immediately target them as a tourist.

Subtle can be very powerful.

Meredith

Veteran

Hmmm, interesting. I don't enjoy wearing things with logos, but that aversion to identifying features doesn't extend to other design details. I'm not looking to advertise where I shop, but I wouldn't pass by a print that I love just because I think someone might know where it came from.

approprio

(website)

Veteran

Ah, like that.

I used to be very averse to things that were in some way identifiable through branding, market saturation etc. Then at some point I realised that just about anything and everything I could put on my back carried some kind of signifier which would spell out something to somebody, because I'd learned how to read those messages myself. And I was responding to them with every stylistic choice I made, either consciously or subconsciously.

Now I just go with it. In general I still prefer things that aren't immediately recognisable, but I've been known to wear things which are veritable designer dog-whistles. And what Meredith said.

Anonymous

I can identify with that! I hate labels and I try to come up with unique (to me) outfits rather than carbon copy looks from a magazine, book or website. Yes I draw inspiration from those sources, but I try to use my own personal touches and not buy most or all of what I wear from the same store. Needing a petite size most of the time makes it harder but not impossible thanks to online stores that carry a good selection of clothing in my size.

Vildy

Veteran

I have a story about dating clothes. Last spring I was going down our block when a teenage girl caught up with me and said, "I hope you don't take this the wrong way but your house must be full of old stuff." I laughed. She explained that she and her mother saw me a few days before with a purse they really liked and her mother said it must be old. In fact, it was. I got it at a sale at an old age home :D. I had always wanted a purse like that since my friend's mother always used them, when we were teenagers. But I got rid of it because I figured out that many times I don't have something exactly because I don't really like it for *me*.

She went on to comment on my outfit. I was wearing a slightly distressed denim outerwear jacket lined with faux fur the color of my hair. She thought that this was *really, really* old. I told her I bought it the week before and while it may be modeled on something really old, it was probably made just a few years before. I got rid of that, too because I am often trying out denim but giving up on it because it feels too restrictive to me. She mentioned a few other items that I don't recall. None of them were old. The one item that I was wearing that was genuinely old - a muted plaid wool pair of pants probably from the late sixties or early seventies - she didn't identify as old. It's all in the eye and experience of the beholder.

She did beg me to please, please never to throw anything away and if I wanted to get rid of anything to come knock on her door.

crutcher

Veteran

Oh, you mean clothes that don't have RALPH LAUREN or TOMMY HILFIGER written across the front...smile...or clothes that don't have an expiration date of the last year or so...I totally get this...How about clothes that don't have a twin walking in the room and eyeing you?...By all of these definitions, I, too, am into the unidentifiable garments...smile...

Windchime

Veteran

What Bettycrocker said, except substitute "tall" for "petite." I have a moto jacket from Gap which I love but feel a wee bit self conscious when I wear it because it is quite distinctive and I wonder if someone might recognize it as the Gap moto jacket from last year.

trekkiegirl

Veteran

In hopes of provoking further thought and discussion, I'd like to ask: Have you considered the motivation beneath your desire for and attraction to these unidentifiable pieces?

Is it because you want the clothing to disappear, as Gaylene says, so that who you are is more noticeable? Or if the item is "a piece that isn't in the mass market that you might see on other people" you want the clothing to be so unidentifiable that it stands out in its uniqueness? Or some other reason I've not identified here?

Anonymous

My reason for wanting to be different in an unidentifiable way is because I don't want to look exactly like anyone else (if I can help it) and because I think if companies like RL want me to advertise their brand by wearing it or (in the case of handbags) carrying it, they should pay me - maybe in the form of giving me their garments or accessories rather than selling them to me.

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

I'm with approprio. I tend to avoid stuff with obvious branding, but I don't think I'm somehow above our consumerist culture or anything like that. If I really wanted to manage that it would take a lot more effort and clothes wouldn't necessarily be the place to start.

I think that anything that's mass manufactured probably is recognizable by some. I, for sure, can eye brands and approximate eras of clothes that most people wouldn't manage, because I'm interested in that sort of thing and I remember obscure details. But people have their own associations with colors, shapes, and fabrics, as Vildy's charming story reminds us, and you can't control what other people think when they look at you. That way lies madness.

AM

Veteran

Gaylene: I don't want myself to disappear but I like the idea of someone looking at me and saying there's something a little different about her style. It's not my objective to be noticed, but I can truthfully say I like this idea. My larger issue is finding pieces I love.

Meredith: Your comment: "I wouldn't pass by a print that I love just because I think someone might know where it came from." This is an interesting comment to me. Prints feel too flashy for me (I'm feeling odder by the moment) -- but I can relate to this because you are wanting to wear what you love. And I absolutely want to wear what I love.

approprio: "because I'd learned how to read those messages myself"; interesting comment about the more informed you are, the more you are able to recognize a brand, a line, a designer, etc. And I am thinking more about a lux brand or those rockstud shoes previously posted this week. I can see myself falling in love with a designer piece if it was in my mind -- rarified gold. And your earlier post -- "keeping people guessing" -- you really master that!

bettycrocker: Your comment, "I try to use my own personal touches" -- precisely. I'm really thinking one aspect of this is individuality.

Vildy: Your comment, "She thought that this was *really, really* old. I told her I bought it the week before..." This is a wonderful concept -- and very appealing to me. Love this story. Thank you for sharing. Made me smile.

Crutcher: Your comment, "clothes that don't have an expiration date...clothes that don't have a twin walking in the room" Yes, yes. You get it but your words are evoke much better visuals. LOL.

Windchime: Oh, you really are hitting on an item on my wish list. The moto jacket. And when you find lines that are so, so classic -- there is comfort that there isn't much to identify this item. Still struggling with this purchase but wanting ultra classic (I think??). Ugh.

tr3kkie9rl: Great question. The BIG WHY. I think it has to do with individuality -- wanting to be uncommon (not having what everyone else has), not being easily copied but I happily share when people ask about my clothes (without a problem in the slightest, I see it as a huge compliment), and the "identifiable feature" -- so many patterns or a strong statement detail make me feel like I'm blinking. And that is just too much attention.

Thanks to all for entering the conversation. And for those that relate, what do you do about it?

AM

Veteran

Laura (and approprio): Sounds like appropro (study this long enough and you can read all the messages). And your comment: "I, for sure, can eye brands and approximate eras of clothes that most people wouldn't manage, because I'm interested in that sort of thing and I remember obscure details." -- What a wonderful skill that both of you have. I wonder if this skill would neutralize some of my sensitivity (as you seem to have seen at all at this point) or up the intellectual process of selecting pieces. I'm thinking BOTH. You both are in enviable positions with your brain trust on style!

old chic

When I was young, I used to make sure my clothing was unique and therefore unidentifiable by making my own. But my real motivation was usually to have something that was stylish but couldn't be found in my small, backwater town. (No internet then, obviously.)

Once in awhile I would stretch and buy something I really loved, but as a result I had the horrifying experience of confronting a girl who was much prettier than I in an identical dress (her's was blue, mine pink) at a high school junior prom. Mortifying for a 16-year-old. And it should have been prevented by the local dress shop who sold us both that dress. I made my own dress for the senior prom.

I have bought some pieces from designer collabs at H&M (especially from the first I remember, KL) and I have enjoyed wearing them. But I never like seeing those pieces on others -- because I fear a repeat of the prom, I guess.

AM

Veteran

old chic: Making my own clothes is highly appealing. So jealous of you gals that have had that experience. And shame, shame on that shop owner. But perhaps the upside (I'm always looking for an upside) -- is that this experience challenged your style diva inside.

Another comment: I am also thinking that there might be a cost aspect to this. If it isn't identifiable as "this season" -- it will never look dated. Hence saving some cash on not feeling that it needs to be updated. I keep my clothes for a very long time (not just because some are finer pieces but also because I tend to have a uniform -- and I just didn't have to think or update this outfit). I am thinking that this has probably robbed me of some creative fun which I am going to fully embrace moving forward.

Anonymous

Also with Approprio, although I don't like text of any kind on my clothes.The information we use to categorize each other includes specific items of clothing but also grooming, styling, overall presentation, etc. and I'm sure that no matter what shirt I'm wearing I'm still identifiable as a "type".
Which is fine, because having repeatedly underestimated the complexity and originality of individuals I had "typed" I know how superficial that categorization is.

annagybe

(website)

Veteran

I think the only way not to appear dated is to go with heritage brands, think Pendleton. In the US that's pretty much Americana. But that's probably not what your looking for.
Or so basic it's not that unique, special snowflake or "twist". ie Levi's 501 & tshirt.
Or basically go full on Japanese avant garde, Yohji etc
Even Tilda Swinton's look will date

Echo

Veteran

It is interesting that so many people view "branded" merchandise as such a horrible thing. Yet most people don't think twice about their car being immediately identifiable (usually not only by the brand and make of the car itself, but also by the dealer's logo). And like someone else mentioned, when you learn to "read the signals", almost anything can be identified. Some of the most prestigious consumer goods have no identifying logos, and yet to anyone who knows, they stand out the most.

I long ago gave up on the idea of deciding not to like something because it was popular. Who does that hurt? If I genuinely liked it before everyone and their brother discovered it, then that decision only hurts me. I am giving up something I genuinely liked simply to look different from the crowd. It's an attitude I gave up in high school.

To anyone who cares, we already DO look different from everyone else, because people who know us identify us by our gait, the tone of our voices, our mannerisms, our laugh. We could be wearing the exact same thing as 10 others in the room, and no one who knows us could mistake us for anyone else. On the other hand, those who don't know us generally don't care. It is rare for anyone else to notice where your clothing came from simply because 80% of people look straight through you anyway. You're thinking about you; they're thinking about themselves. Think about it this way: how many people do you figure you saw today? A hundred? A thousand? Now, how many outfits, bags, shoes, even hairstyles do you remember? On an average day, it is likely to be none.

My point is simply that in the end, the only person it really matters to is yourself. So I am a big proponent of wearing what you love (provided it is situationally appropriate). If a person prefers "unidentifiable" clothing, great. But if you pass something by simply because it is popular or is on the mannequin at your favourite store, I think that's unfortunate. A year from now, no one will remember where it came from, but you may still love it and wear it for another few years.

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

Echo, it does remind me a bit of that "I liked them before they were cool" backlash that happens with music when we're (generalizing) in our teenage and college years. There's a desire to want to differentiate ourselves from people and feel like we are unique and part of the in-crowd, even if our in-crowd is someone else's out-crowd. I don't mean to sound patronizing, but I think it's a phase that everyone goes through, developmentally, and some people get stuck in it for a very long time. Clothes are one of the big signifiers of socioeconomic class, political leanings, etc., in our society and so it's only natural that we seek to align ourselves either with certain groups, or explicitly against certain others, with our clothing and grooming. I don't think you can ever get away from it - just like you can't escape environmental norms, unless you stop interacting with society all together - you just become aware that there are multiple layers of meaning and interaction going on at the same time, and not all of them are within our control.

I don't remember the name or blog of the woman who tried that "wear identical dresses for a year" thing but it would be an interesting read relevant to this discussion.

I sew, inexpertly, and although a lot of my projects end up unwearable or as pajamas that never leave the house, I have found it an empowering and broadening thing to learn how a garment is conceived of and put together, in the mechanical sense, outside of any of our typical capitalist/consumerist concerns like cost, accessibility and branding. There's the level of clothes that are functional, the level that's aspirational/marketing, and all the messy bits of gender presentation, hidden expectations, assumptions about bodies, etc., all mixed together when you buy something or put it on in the morning and wear it out around other people.

AM

Veteran

isabel: Regarding "typed" - I know I am guilty of this but I also know that my eye goes to pieces of/or an entire outfit regardless of who is wearing it -- and something can make me pause. I enjoy asking people where they purchased that said item, I'm really much more interested in what they are wearing for my own personal knowledge.

annagybe: "so basic it's not that unique" -- well said. That is the fine line that I am exploring. Where is that edge? Where is my edge? I find brands (even higher end like Vince or Theory) that the quality is higher but they can feel just a little basic but then there are those pieces within those line that are just have that "twist" that you speak of. And when I say "twist" I really mean something subtle.

Echo: Your comment: "Some of the most prestigious consumer goods have no identifying logos, and yet to anyone who knows, they stand out the most." - If you are speaking about goods in the fashion/style category -- well, I'm a novice and just don't have this trained eye. And I wouldn't say I "give up on things because that are popular", I just buy what I like. Your comment: "We already DO look different" -- so true but my eye often explores what people are wearing in attempts to soak up inspiration. And often my eye is simply drawn in by some subtle detail that I find exceptionally pleasing. It is this balance of unidentifiable but with the subtle detail that really makes my heart sing that I am coming to realize is more my style.

Laura (rhubarbgirl): Your comment: "There's a desire to want to differentiate ourselves from people and feel like we are unique and part of the in-crowd, even if our in-crowd is someone else's out-crowd." Interesting to explore differentiation and I just stopped to think about this for a little bit -- but for me, I am quite certain that I don't like what any crowd likes. I will spend hours flipping through web pages of numerous brands (low end, high end, who cares) but I so rarely find anything that I like. Back to liking unidentifiable, I just like (probably love) such basic/minimally styled pieces -- and a result (one would expect) that it could be bought anywhere.

annagybe

(website)

Veteran

Ohhhh you want something that could be bought anywhere.
So based on my world travels that would be Zara or H&M.
High end those branded designer labels you are adverse to.
As an aside to my previous comment. If you do Japanese avant garde, it would only work in major metropolitan cities & only in certain circles. Otherwise everyone else thinks you are just weird.

L'Abeille

Veteran

AM, you are reminding me of a novel I read recently, Pattern Recognition by William Gibson (although it's been out for probably a decade). The main character has an aversion to branding -- an allergy in fact. She not only cuts off or files off any identifying marks, but she only wears items that could have come from any time in the last 100 years. Her friends call her wardrobe items "Cayce Pollard units" (CP being her name). One of her items was an exclusive remake of an obscure wartime aviator jacket.

Not only was the story a fascinating one, but since then I read an article in a fashion blog about a guy who wears all black and thinks of his wardrobe in Cayce Pollard units.

So, I get it, and you are in exalted company!

AM

Veteran

L'Abeille: Sounds like an interesting novel. I am in the process of identifying pieces I want in my wardrobe -- for example Menswear Gray Blazer; and then I just want to select the one that is pretty darn basic (because that's what appeals to me) but has just the right details. Because these details will be subtle and pretty timeless. I see this as a "unit" -- and it's not that I am steering away from brands -- it's just that my interest lies in design that I often have hard to find. And I'm often shocked by this as I think my taste is again so basic it could be from anywhere but it is often no where. So, this character having a remake of an obscure wartime aviator jacket -- well, that just bring a big smile to my face! Thanks for sharing. I keep repeating this but I am a real novice but want to understand my style for the simple purpose of articulating it, executing it, and making this process more efficient and more fun! Pretty simple, right??

Suz

(website)

Veteran

AM, it could be simply that you have a modern classic style with minimalist leanings. If so, I can join you on that bench.

This reminds me of the ongoing "essentials" vs. "statements" discussions we've had here from time to time.

Left to our own devices, some of us tend to gravitate towards a closet of "essentials" (or what some might call basics) -- simple, streamlined pieces that mix and match pretty well without drawing attention to themselves.

And some of us gravitate more to a closet of "statement" items -- those items that have the "twist" you speak about, or more -- seem to draw attention to themselves.

We all fall somewhere on this continuum. And we have different reasons. For some, essentials feel more "practical" so they can justify the purchase. For others, essentials simply speak to their style sensibility more. Meanwhile, others find them dull or boring. "Statements" might feel more "fun" or "interesting" or represent a bigger luxury (which for some is a good thing and for others feels risky or "bad.")

The truth is, for most of us, a closet without some simple "unrecognizable" pieces (or perhaps less recognizable, more flexible/ adaptable pieces) is quite simply unworkable. A lot of forum members actually find themselves here because of that. They have a ton of great stuff but can't make outfits that work.

Meanwhile, even for the most classic, minimalist dresser, a closet of nothing but essentials will eventually get very boring. And that is another reason a lot of us end up here. For me, it's a constant battle to get myself to buy statement items, but I know that I must have them. What counts as a "statement" might be less obvious to a quiet minimalist dresser, but statement there must be.

And, as others have said, statement or not, all of it is identifiable to the trained eye and observers will read it in ways that we have little control over. Although obviously branded stuff is more easily identifiable. And loud patterns, bright colours, wild shapes are more memorable and in that sense "identifiable."

I suspect that as someone with fairly low contrast colouring, part of your wish to wear clothes that don't scream for attention is simply a wish to wear clothes that are in harmony with YOU. Does that make any sense?

Fascinating discussion, all. I have enjoyed everyone's comments.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Hmmm. It also sounds as if uniform dressing appeals to you.

AM

Veteran

Annagybe: Your are correct when you say Zara and H&M -- not that these feel dead on but you bring up the point that I haven't kept up with newer brands. All Saints, Mango (I just saw this posted), and I'm sure the list goes on. Eager to learn about additional resources.

Suz: Yes and yes.

Yes, modern classic style with minimalist leanings.
Nice reference to a continuum of essentials to statements.
Yes, my statements are still on the minimal side.
Yes, because of minimal statements there is the need to explore the edge.
Yes, enjoy uniform.
Yes, I am someone with fairly low contrast colouring, part of your wish to wear clothes that don't scream for attention. At least I think (Blonde with blue eyes.) -- Never thought about this. Really great insight for me. This is a big one for me to recognize.
And yes, you are wonderfully capturing many of these themes.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Someone with a high contrast colouring or very bright colouring can naturally take more contrast or colour without feeling overwhelmed by it. Personality also plays a role, and how much makeup you like to wear -- that kind of thing. Your whole "vibe." When we pick our clothes, we're unconsciously responding to signals from the world around us, but also to clues that we get from our own essence, as it were. As an ashy blonde with blue eyes and fair skin, you look great in the palette in Angie's blog post today, for example. Someone high contrast or warmer toned might be totally washed out by that. And someone with a very lively personality might not feel right in it, even if it looked good on the surface.

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