Not being prepared - What happens when you don't buy ahead

On Saturday, Mr. SF and I will be going to a memorial service for a relative of mine. We will be driving 2.5 hours each way (5.0 hours total). Garth is staying at home with a neighbour.

I used to have an outfit to wear to a funeral. But over the last few years, I have lost weight because of medical reasons. My tops still fit, but my pants are too big and can't be altered.

I also have problem feet that have gotten worse.

What do I wear?

Possibilities:

1/ Black Lole mini dress with leggings and new Reiker boots (look like Doc Martens). Wear cognac Theory coat, and don't take it off. Or I may buy the Clark brown booties and wear them instead.

2/ Black jeans (they are very black) with a black Sarah Pacini blazer and new Reiker boots. Then I can take my coat off. I may look like I walked out of the 90s.

I don't have time to shop, and there isn't anywhere to shop in my small rural town.

Any comments and feedback are welcome.

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1 year ago

LJP

Veteran

I vote for outfit #2 . The wide leg pants are fabulous on you .

Style Fan

Thanks, Lisa. I should do an outfit lab. The boots are not that tall.

nuancedream

Another vote for outfit #2. So sorry for your loss.

Jessikams

(website)

Ugh, preparing for a funeral is the worst I think your pants outfit sounds like it will be more comfortable. Or, if you want something more formal, perhaps you have something in your closet that is dark navy, gray or brown?

Suz

Another vote for outfit 2. The pants, ironically, look a bit dressier. Also they might be more comfortable for the trip.

I'm sorry for your loss; it's always tough to deal with these situations but people really will just be glad you are there.

Runcarla

#2 with black sheers or tights under for coverage and warmth. Some venues (like churches) can be cold, and there is often standing around outside afterwards for conversations. Sometimes interment follows after the funeral, and other times it is deferred to a later date.

Condolences…

Thank you, everyone. Outfit #2 is the winner.

I am putting dress pants on my shopping list. Unfortunately, the only bottoms I have are very casual -- jeans, cords, and army pants. I don't want to go through this again.

Socks bother my feet. Seriously. I will look for some black knee-highs to wear when we get there.

Aritzia

Wilfred the effortless pant

Top Pick

Irina

Another vote for #2.

And my condolences.

Elle

So sorry for your loss. And another vote for the pants outfit

Thank you, Irina. #2 is the winner.

Jaime

My condolences and good decision about the outfit.

Rejoiceandbe

Active Member

Condolences. Funerals are always hard and the travel part of the process seems twice as long as for happy occasions. I agree that the second outfit is the smarter but which feels most comfortable to you?

slim cat

Perfect outfit plan.
Condolences.

Bijou

Sorry to hear of this situation. Outfit 2 looks perfect and is hopefully warm and comfy. I think most somber colours are acceptable at a funeral. At my parents funerals I didn’t notice what people wore other than it was not a sea of black.

Jenni NZ

Same as everyone, and hope it all goes well. Sorry you have lost someone.

Zaeobi

If socks bother you, perhaps footless tights can help give you some warmth under the wide legged trousers but without any toe constriction? Sorry for your loss.

Anonymous

Yes to outfit 2, it definitely looks dressier
Sorry about your loss

Joy

I can identify with trying to shop in a small rural town for something to wear to a funeral. I was unprepared for my mother to die when she did and had to shop at Walmart for an outfit it the midst of consoling my dad and making funeral plans.
Condolences on your loss.

Cardiff girl

So sorry for your loss.l think outfit 3 looks fab ,put a formal big coat on top and you will be fine.As long as you don’t stand out as being highly inappropriate most people are too busy thinking their own thoughts about the deceased to worry too much about what everyone else is wearing.But l get it ,you want to be respectful.

Angie

Fashion Stylist

My thumbs are up for #2 too!

My condolences.

Thanks, everyone. I am taking my new Rieker boots back. I wore them around the house, and they hurt my feet. Not sure what I am going to put on my feet.
I am probably overthinking this. I don't remember what people wore to my mother's or father's funeral.

CarolS

I think that's the thing -- no one is focussed on what you're wearing. They see if you're there or not. Maybe they notice if you're in something glaringly out of place. But the focus of the day is elsewhere. As long as you are covered, respectful and comfortable, that is really enough.

Bonnie

Not being prepared happened to me, too. We were on a long RV camping trip when my dear uncle died, and were we about 300 miles from where he lived. I was totally unprepared with anything appropriate but I did have a white and black stripe tunic, black jeans, and black Nikes. with me so that is what I wore. No one cared or noticed what I wore, they were just happy that I was there.

rachylou

2 is a good choice. Peace for you and your family.

Sal

That’s hard and I agree with Cardiff Girl and others - people don’t notice. I only remember what I wore to my Mums funeral - not what anyone else wore.

A dark pair of dress pants or tunic dress or skirt is a good thing to have in the closet. Doesn’t have to be black though.

I hope it all goes okay - funerals are therapeutic and draining.

Sisi

Another vote for # 2.
I am sorry for your loss, Style Fan. Hugs.

Janet

It seems you’ve got this sorted, and I agree with the others that no one will really notice much what you’re wearing unless it’s wildly off the norm. I think it’s a good plan to have separates in your wardrobe that make for a good last-minute occasion like this, because we do tend to feel better if we are dressed in a way that fits how we want to present ourselves. I’m very sorry for your loss.

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