New rules for color choices with grey hair - YouLookFab Forum

Category

Dressing

New rules for color choices with grey hair

LynneS

I'm 13 months into transitioning into grey hair (at 52) and am frustrated with most of the online "advice" on changing the colors of the clothes I wear and my makeup. I was an autumn, with auburn hair and hazel eyes. Despite what the grey "experts" -- many who are at least a decade older than me -- say, I can still wear the colors I love, since my skin tone hasn't changed and my eyes haven't faded. Angie and all: please advise those of us who don't want to wear the 1980s jewel tones or the baby pastels the "granny stylists" insist are proper at this stage of life. I firmly believe that up to date specs, well cut and stylish clothes, the right makeup colors, a great haircut, and a confident attitude keep people looking young, no matter what their hair color.

Dressing

16 replies

Latest reply was from Linda

Anonymous

Hear, hear! And I think your last sentence is all the advice there needs to be. I've been graying since age 14 (now 43, and I've never colored it) and I don't feel my clothing color choices have had to change much, but I do feel that makeup makes a difference. My eyebrows and eyes are still very dark, but I feel a little blush and a more colorful lip keep me from looking too faded.

Elizabeth P

Veteran

I think if you are wearing the "right" colours before you transition, you are absolutely right. But a lot of people colour their hair in tones that aren't actually that flattering to them, so I think when they transition, the colours they look good in DO change.

But I really just wanted to say congrats to you on your progress, and I 100% agree with your last sentence.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

It sounds like you have a good handle on what looks good on you. I believe there are undertones to grey as much as to any hair colour -- and some will be warmer toned greys than others. It makes perfect sense that you would want to wear the clothes that flatter your complexion. Sure, grey looks smashing with blue, orchid, teal, cranberry reds, fuchsia, black, winter white, etc. etc. (This is my own personal palette so I know it works! My hair is not yet grey but is greying blonde.)

But grey ALSO looks amazing with mustard, citron, rust reds, tomato, coral, cognac, chocolate brown, eggplant, persimmon, marsala, olive....the list could go on and on.

Maybe grey is just the perfect neutral?

Thirkellgirl

Veteran

If I wear what I call Queen Mum colors - baby blue, lilac, pale pink - I think I look much, much older than when I wear bolder colors. The more silver I get in my hair, the more grey works in my personal wardrobe, and I haven't really worn much grey since my prep school blazer. I agree with you about updated eyeglasses and makeup. I find that I wear more makeup now (I got away without blush for years, for instance, but now I look so much better with some color on my cheeks) than when my hair was darker brown.

Anonymous

Lynne, you could try the colours from the Soft Autumn palette which are a tad more muted than Autumn colours. A lot of the colours Suz mentioned at the end of her post are in the SA range and would be fab!

retailgirl

Veteran

My hair is salt and pepper, never colored it. I think it's like my mother's, and hers never turned truly gray or white. ( unlike my father, who had beautiful pearly white hair.). So I have never changed what colors I wore as my hair turned more gray. Black, navy, gray, white, red, emerald, cobalt. I find that both black and gray look better on me now...perhaps because my hair was dark brown and there wasn't enough contrast. I wear a lot of gray. I do feel that I need lipstick, always, and a little eyeliner and mascara, more so than when I was younger. ( no blush. Never liked it.).

Firecracker (Sharan)

Veteran

Lynne, I agree with all that you wrote, and you have gotten some wonderful advice here. I like Suz's and Diane's suggestions for color palettes. I just want to chime in and say that since my hair started graying, I find that I am loving warm gray and taupe, shades of dark brown, dark olive--all colors that I did not wear when my hair was deep brunette. Angie and others here on YLF refer to my colors as "moody." I love my muted neutrals and dark colors. Oh, and let's not forget distressed metallics! To my eye, they bring out the shine in graying hair. The one neutral that I really dislike on myself is heather gray, because it just makes my hair look gray--plain, dull gray. The warm grays and olives don't have that effect. Hope you have fun experimenting and finding just the right shades to bring out your best!

Anonymous

I think grey hair looks best when it's incorporated as an intentional element. Some women wear it very well as a style statement, and the colors, (or lack of) that they choose are intended to act as backdrops. But it doesn't necessarily have to be be the most dominant factor, and skin tone, for example can be very important. Many women with grey hair have fairly even complexions and the color on their faces is from applied makeup. Maybe jewel tones or pastels would be flattering to them, but if you, like myself, have a lot of natural facial color those colors can be hard to wear. I think the single most important thing, way more important than anything else, is that the hairstyle should be current and well executed.
I've never colored my hair, and have been conspicuously greying for about 10 years. In the past two years I've received more compliments on my hair than in the all the preceding years. I imagine you must have mixed feelings about it but your last sentence is exactly right!

unfrumped

Veteran

I haven't taken that gray advice as something to be followed rigidly--I just think it's a reminder to re-evaluate "best" colors over the course of time, and that graying hair is one thing that can create a major change in appearance and color/tone flattery.

I think my skin tone can skew a bit warm or cool, though more cool, so my sprinkling of more gray hair has shifted me cooler and softer, though not to pastels. But someone who was very strongly "warm" before graying may not feel as much shift.

I do think color and complexion/hair combinations look, well, how they look, confidence or no, and also, that most people can wear quite a range of colors without any disaster, and can wear most favorite colors in some kind of tone or incarnation, so it's all good.

MsMaven

Veteran

I almost could have written this post, except that I am 18 months into growing out and I am several years older than you. I'm pretty much a soft autumn as well. I've settled on blonde highlights after trying a combination with low-lights (which I didn't like) but I'm still not sure what color gray my hair will turn out to be. Right now it seems like a mix of dark and light (not including highlights.)

Inspired by many YLF'ers this January I have been purging and pruning my closet. I know that I no longer feel comfortable in colors I used to wear, but I'm not sure which direction I want to go. Also, fashion has changed to more gray tones, along with black and white in the last year. I've been thinking about which direction I want to go.

I think it is going to take some experimenting and some analysis. I'll be watching this three and others who are solving the same problem.

LynneS

Thank you all, for the wise and prompt feedback. I was getting so tired of reading the "never, ever wear oatmeal" types of comments elsewhere on the Internet and suspected it wasn't applicable to all. The oatmeal that I never wore in public was that caked on my shirt from a toddler;-)

Anonymous

Oatmeal, really! I know a woman who has pure platinum hair, and I saw her the other day in this gorgeous oatmeal-colored Eileen Fisher-esque top -- she was absolutely stunning in it. Made her glow.

Anonymous

My grey hair has changed and probably still is changing shades. It started as looking blond for a long time, then more taupe grey, now more silver. My color was once brunette,dark brown with reddish undertones, then grew lighter. My best colors have gone from greyed midtones to navy and jewel tones, to taupes and brights, to clear midtones. I now wear both warm and cool colors. Neutrals are best in lighter shades but navy is still good. Just be aware that things keep changing.

Caro in Oz

Veteran

I say wear the colours you love & the styles YOU feel great in & forget the rules.

Angie gives style guidelines not rules - which is much more helpful imo. It doesn't mean we can't get advice from others; but I think we need to learn to trust ourselves first.

I didn't feel as great in browns when my hair went grey but I started wearing more black & really didn't like the way I looked or felt in it - I needed extra make up too. I now wear warm green-y greys instead & love the way I feel in them

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

I agree with Joy and others that it keeps evolving. My hair started out very dark brown, almost black, but by time I was in my 40s it was the reddish dark brunette of hair dye. After I let the grey grow in I found I gravitated toward black, white and yes, the dreaded pastels - which I still love. Now I am letting in more warm dark olives and camels. I don't think there are universal rules.

Linda

I vote for "evolve" too. I also find I wear more carefully-applied makeup now, in order to feel and look alert. (I used to be able to dash out the door with maybe blush and some mascara and lip gloss. Now I'm more on the contoured eyelid, blush, curled lashes, mascara, and lip stain side of things, I think it makes a huge difference. I guess my complexion has lost a youthful glow eh?). My hair, like my late Mom's, is along the salt-and-pepper lines but the pepper is dark ash blond to ash brown, just a streak or two of real grey. I have found that the effect is a muting of my former color, rather than complete change (I haven't gone "gray" in the sense of having a head full of white hair; sometimes I envy that).