I don't think Anna is blaming anyone for the comments or saying that they should have known. She is just asking people not to do it in the future and explaining the reasons why.
Anna, I do think that the words "lay off" were a bit off putting but I am willing to give you the benefit of the doubt on this and can imagine it being said in spoken language in a way that wouldn't raise hackles.

I think others (Marley, Una, Ceit, Hil) have expressed my reaction to this post.

FWIW, I prefer your hair down. When others were complimenting it pulled back or up, I didn't add a comment because I guess I follow the adage of 'if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.'

Forgive me for saying, It's threads like these that keep introverts like me on the fringe. I would love to post pics and would really like the feedback but the drama is offputting. My problem I know. Sorry you're not happy with the responses you've received regarding your hair annagybe. You always look fab.

The ironic thing is that this type of brouhaha (great word, innit?) almost never happens here on YLF, while truly nasty exchanges are fairly typical of so many internet forums. I wouldn't worry too much about people here saying inappropriate things.

For what it's worth, anna, I can add that I thought you were overreacting. However, the few responses Greg took down (after I'd seen them) were overly harsh too. Somewhere in the middle...you sound stressed out, and we all have a tendency to not think as clearly when we're tired and overworked. I hope to see you keep posting here, with the agreement that everyone here is on your side and trying to simply show appreciation, which I hope you can graciously accept.

I have to agree that first you were unhappy that people didn't post enough to your WIWs, and then you wondered why people didn't list you as someone's style they aspired to. Now that people are responding positively to posts you have made, you are unhappy about that, too.

I also have to wonder what else in your life is making you kind of touchy right now. If the stresses of your job are too much, then take a break from other things causing you stress. There is no obligation to post WIWs, although we all enjoy them. You have a lot going on, and I understand how awful that can be, but most posters here have nothing but the best intentions.

As for hairstyles, it seems there is often a preference for shorter hair here. That's okay. My hair is not short, and I likely never will have it short again. I've tried that and it didn't work for me. But if someone were to suggest it to me, I would take it in stride and thank them for the suggestion and go about my life. Much like if someone were to suggest I buy leather leggings. Short hair, leather leggings, etc. are all great things for the people they work for, but only I know ME, and only you know YOU. Don't clobber people over the head who are giving genuine compliments but who may not know what you are thinking.

Greg - I suspected that was the case. Thanks for clarifying!

Hope you and Angie are hanging in there.

I fail to see how complimenting someone's hair, whether it's up, down, or sideways, could be inappropriate, but the solution is clear - hit the snooze button.

Greg, would you consider taking this entire thread down? I see people saying things they'll regret later. Sorry you have to deal with this today, of all days.

Yes, thanks Greg! It didn't ring true that lurkers would suddenly come out of the woodwork and be bothered by this enough to post like that.

I am so often impressed by how supportive and articulate YLFers can be -- when they disagree with someone, and even when they feel the need to chide someone. I don't have the same way with words, but am learning here how to be honest, yet tactful.

I'd like to think we'll all be honest about who we are, and tactful about what we want or need to say. We're here to have fun with fashion

Agreeing with cobaltblue, this is sad to see and inappropriate for such a positive place.

I guess it's good I read this post, because I wouldn't want to offend you. I'm afraid I might have made an unintentional compliment on your hair (although I don't think I would have said you "look better" this way or that way). If it was me, though, I'm very sorry.

We are closing this thread and moving it to off topic.