Musings on Mojo and WIWs - YouLookFab Forum

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Musings on Mojo and WIWs

Peri

Veteran

I've really been missing some veteran members lately and musing over the reasons people come and go. It seems to be mostly life changes...some good that leave no time and some stressful that leave no time. Whether I'm happy for them or concerned for them, I still miss them!

Another reason seems to be reaching closet goals. A few members have said they are posting less because their closet is in such a happy place. Huh? I'd love to see that!

And yet I understand...I'm posting less because I have begun to feel like I've reached my potential. I wouldn't call it a super happy place, more like a "probably the best I can do given some restrictions" place. At first I thought I wasn't posting due to weather fatigue, but we've gotten a little cooler and I'm still feeling no reason to show anything because it is mostly the same stuff. I feel decent about what I wear, I'm not undergoing any style shifts or in search of any particular help like I was when I started here, so it feels like there is no real reason to show anything. Most of what I wear isn't new. It's all just Variations on a Theme, which is a more fun way of saying uniform dressing. Good happiness factors, but nothing special.

But...I'm missing others posting and the reasons don't seem to be all that different. So I'm musing over reasons to post WIW if you don't need any specific advice. I want to see other people's on ordinary days, but think no one wants to see mine...weird and possibly wrong? All I know is that I'm missing the inspiration of a lot of old friends!

So, to put my money where my mouth is, here are a few recent "Variations on a Theme of Flowy with Necklaces". (Beth Ann and other musicians will get the tittle.)

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34 replies

Latest reply was from Helen11

Firecracker (Sharan)

Veteran

Peri, these are beautiful looks! I especially love the blues, with your pretty matching nail color and necklace. I'm glad you posted, because I recommended you to someone in a thread yesterday (ReneeG).

I stopped taking and posting outfit photos after doing it every day for a year. Now I've gotten back to taking some photos and posting some, as I have (or make) time. Sometimes, like you, I feel I'm just repeating some of my formulas, so why bother. Now that I've completed a closet edit, I'm feeling really good about what remains in my closet. In the last few days, I wore outfits I was really happy with--though they were just everyday things, I felt good in them--and felt a little sad about not getting photos of them to share here. I just didn't take the time.

I do appreciate seeing WIWs, and it's nice to come here and see old YLF friends and meet new ones.

MTBGirl

Veteran

Peri, I feel exactly where you're coming from. "I want to see other people's ordinary days but think no one wants to see mine...weird and possibly wrong?" I totally feel this way too. And I don't think it's weird, but I do think it's wrong. But it's easy to feel that way. I think that whatever pictures someone is inspired to share is a good thing. And whatever comments someone is inspired to share too. A lot of times I don't even comment on something because I feel inadequate or unknowledgeable, because I've got so much to learn, because what do I know. But opinions are just that - opinions. I know what I think and how something makes me feel. I'm glad you posted this for two reasons - as it shows me that I'm not alone in some of these feelings, and it inspires me to open up more.
I love your mint necklace with the cobalt top and the way your nails are coordinated with it! You look terrific and I think #4 is killer!

Anonymous

Oh, your outfits are lovely! The drape, the luxuriousness of the fabrics and lovely jewellery is all fab.

I'm afraid I've been guilty of a distinct lack of WIW's lately. The reasons for me weren't reaching my 'happy place' with my wardrobe (oh, I wish) or fear of just showing the 'same old same old'. For me it was too much work, fatigue, and also a real lack of interest in anything fashion at all

Perhaps it was that I lost my mojo, I'm not sure, but nothing peaked my interest. Being short of time can severely put the brakes on too. Another main factor for me though is often my lifestyle is just stuck at home so much that I get the 'why bother with fashion' feeling a lot, unfortunately.

Anyhoo, I had some time off this week to re-evaluate and I'm deciding on cutting back on work, which should help a bit.

I love to see wiw's and realise, how nice it is to see outfits on real women. And, you know, I don't mind seeing repeats of items re-mixed as it's great inspiration for us all.

Anonymous

First of all : I love your jewellery. I forgot we have the same cobalt blouse, and I'm inspired to try something around my neck with it. I love the layered gold in the second pic, and the stones on the taupe top in the third. Jewellery is so personal and unique and hardly any of us has the same things - which makes it even more interesting.

Secondly - regarding WIW postings. I think I know what you mean. Why indeed? I only post about 1 out of 7 outfits I wear, and the rest are just , well, clothes, and it takes a lot of time and fussing to pose, snap, edit and post pictures. Who stands around their house in shoes and bag and coat and with hair all looking decent? Not me, that's for sure. Anyways - I enjoy looking at them and get inspiration in the most unexpected places here.

Missing older members? Me too! Many of the women who attracted my attention when I joined a little over a year ago are no longer around. I guess it's the cycle these types of forums go through.

Sara L.

Veteran

Nice outfits! I love your jewelry and the drapiness of your tops.

I actually take a photo everyday to send to my sister, who does the same thing for me. I don't post everything on YLF because some are repeats and some outfits are boring. I know people say they like looking at ordinary outfits, but I've noticed posts like that don't seem to get many comments (I remember another forum member saying the same thing). I don't need 50 comments but I would like at least a few if I'm going to go to the effort of posting.

Sometimes I'm looking for suggestions on how to wear something or that I wore something new. Sometimes I just post to get some acknowledgement that I made an effort and wore something cute, since I don't get much feedback from my coworkers or family.

UmmLila (Lisa)

Veteran

I like it when everyone posts their WIWs -- just to connect with people and see what they are wearing, not necessarily because I'm looking for something directional or because they need a question answered. It's good to see what other people who like to dress well do with themselves on a daily basis. And I always like your dramatic color choices, Peri.

Maneera

(website)

Veteran

Love the outfits. You have really gorgeous jewelry, Peri....and a real knack for wearing it in creative ways.

I posted a lot of WIWs a while back and had to tone it down a bit becoz I was extremely busy with work. Plus, most of YLF was enjoying cool weather and fall dressing when it was still summer here. I spent a whole month looking at other ppls outfits-drooling-and wishing I could wear the same! Not cool!

Thankfully the weather is starting to turn. Hopefully I'll get to showcase my winter wardrobe soon! you definitely should do WIWs more frequently...you've inspired me to layer my necklaces!

Susie

Veteran

Peri, you look amazing in cobalt. Really in all the deep colors, which are my favorites too so I love to see your outfits. I'm pretty close to having a similar uniform, with longer shaped/asymmetrical tops and slim leg pants. And I've been on necklaces and scarves as my 'third piece' for months now.

I've gotten away from posting WIW photos too. It's a combination of reasons for me, from pictures that aren't great quality (with my phone, in my closet), to knowing that how I 'feel' in an outfit is more important to me than how others might see it, to feeling that I am certainly no fashionista so why would anyone want to see what I wear, to feeling a little weird/vain about saying "look at me."

Ok, that was probably way more than you were looking for!

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Peri you look GORGEOUS in cobalt. And how lovely to see your jewellery up close. It's as lovely as you are. Pretty nails on pretty piano hands too.

I echo what Ummlila said.

Makrame

Veteran

These are beautiful looks! I really like the drapy, flowing tops with the long necklaces - what a great formula!

Haven't been posting much for the last year - I think you are right that as people reach the balance with their wardrobe and have a better idea of their style, posting sometimes tends to taper off.

Kimbacat

Oh yes, the member postings are my favorite aspect.

Aida

Veteran

So nice to see you Peri! And glad to hear things are going ok. That cobalt is incredible on you, and the layered necklaces look really fun with the flowy tops. #2 could be a stock photo, so pretty! (I was never able to wear polish when I played the piano, always managed to leave streaks of pretty colors on the keys.) LOVE your "sharp" necklace

I hear you on missing seeing many forum members who aren't currently active. And I think a lot of veteran members go through this same feeling you're having in regards to posting outfits, myself included, regardless of whether or not we're in any sort of closet nirvana. But I totally echo what UmmLila said about enjoying seeing the "daily stuff", uniform formulas or otherwise. And my favorite part of this forum are the connections we're able to make across the globe through something as simple as what we're wearing.

For what it's worth I'd love to see more outfits from you! Even if it's something you feel is uniform -- you're far more used to your style and your items than we are

Brooklyn

Veteran

Hi Peri. You look beautiful in your outfits and I particularly love no 4 and how you have layered the necklaces. I love seeing posts from members (including this one) because it often inspires me to try something new (like layering necklaces). I am very happy to see repeats and variations. And more than happy to see "ordinary" wear. I am often reluctant to post because here we are in a different season so what I wear is not of great interest/relevance to most members and a lot of my stuff is not new or is bought in Australia. And then there is the whole "look at me" thing which is kind of uncomfortable. But I do it because I really really like to see what other people are wearing so I figure I should reciprocate. And it is a great way to connect. I hope you continue to post

SAWEBER95

Member

I just joined today and I am SO excited to be part of this website. I love fashion but I just don't feel like I'm great at it... I have an eye for something super cute at the vintage store or even Target, but when I take it home... I don't know what to pair it with! I'm sorry that so many people have left but I hope to contribute to this forum by posting questions for advice... you'll see a lot of "how can I make this outfit better?" or "what do I wear this with?!" I hope that is what you are looking for in your community members.

Stephanie

You look amazing in blue! I'm newer here and have only posted a few times, so your looks are brand new to me The drape of your last outfit is stunning. Really like your jewelry as well.

I'm still undecided on posting WIWs. But I agree with others…I really like seeing what everyone is wearing on a day to day basis. So maybe that means some of us should be brave and post anyway! So much of social media/forums/etc or anything online really is often a highlight reel. I think maybe it'd be good to post weekly WIWs, show the good and the bad, and just keep it real.

It seems there are a lot of new members coming in even when older ones don't post as often, so I'm sure nobody would get sick of seeing repeats or uniform like outfits. It's good inspiration for all of us to try new things.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

YLF is almost 10 years old - I can scarcely believe it.

It is the nature of any forum that its members come and go due to a myriad of reasons. And new members join at the same rate as the older ones go so there is a constant engaged bustle on the forum.

Older members who leave are welcome when they want to rejoin at any time. No one should feel obligated to stay or leave. The YLF community is here to support each other and have lots of fun along the way.

Anonymous

Peru, I miss many members too and agree with Ummlila. I haven't been posting outfits lately because of travel and visitors. I love to see members in pieces and outfits that they have shown us before, often worn a little differently. It also helps just to see other women making an effort on a daily basis and encourages others to do it too.
Your jewelry looks just right on you, dainty and delicate like you.

Aida

Veteran

Peri I also wanted to add a quick thing related to your post a while back on the heat. There were a lot of replies from those in the same boat, feeling like they wanted fall but were stuck in hot weather. I think that it would be super helpful to many if you gals had posted more of your "hot fall" outfits instead of feeling like you should be posting "cold fall" outfits! That's the reality, and that's what we're all here for

catgirl

Veteran

I haven't been posting outfits because of lack of time for pics and also not feeling like anything is that new or exciting. I do miss other people, though and feel that they inspire me with everyday outfits. I just posted two WIWs because of you, Peri.

Beth Ann

Veteran

You look very "sharp," Peri! I thought of you when I recently posted some Finds at J. Jill -- items that reminded me of you. Now, they're mostly basics, but we all need foundation pieces!

I miss many of our veterans, too, Peri! I've been making an effort to "get to know" and invest in some of our fab newbies, and am finding new favorites. I love seeing new members catch the fire and find their groove!

You know how to make the most of "piano wear." You know, clothing that is elegant, but simple. Layering necklaces is all the rage, and your pieces (and nails) are gorgeous. Perhaps you could focus for a few weeks on accessories? Or, alternatively, wearing the same basic color every day for a week, or redeeming an orphan (I've been doing this laterly).

Managing to wear beautiful color daily, in garments that fit well and have lovely fabrications, is a big win! I think it means more to dress this way every day than to nail the "perfect outfit" for special events, etc.

Bonnie

Veteran

I think the veterans really help the newbies with their WIW posts. I look at clothes on models and don't get a realistic view of how the item really looks on a normal person. They sometimes make the clothes look desirable but often make the clothes look boring. I especially like to look at the posts from people who have a similar body shape and style as I have, and with lots of people posting I can find someone to learn from. So please keep posting for those of us who have recently joined and it sounds like your old friends appreciate your posts, too.

Peri

Veteran

Thanks everyone! I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one missing our friends and at the same time wondering if my outfits merit posting. I guess if we all give in to that feeling there will be no pictures to look at at all.

At the same time, I think some life events may be feeding this sense of loss. It makes sense that the board will always be in flux, I'm just not in a change happy mood lately. Except weather. I want that to change!

Thanks for all the support!

Dee

Veteran

First off, cobalt is an amazing color on you!

I lurked for awhile before officially joining this site so quite a few people I admired are no longer around (or at least not very frequently). I'm sure it's due to all sort of factors. I used to post more WIWs but I haven't been shopping as much so I wonder how often I should document the repeats? But at the same time, I always appreciate when veterans post outfits so I can see where they're at.

Beth Ann

Veteran

My computer is slow --- double post!

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

Peri the cobalt top is particularly stunning on you! I also miss some old members and will be delighted if they choose to return one day, but there are always new members coming in, which is grand! I love seeing people's outfits and would probably post more if I had a better photo taking spot. I tend to take more photos when I am experimenting too.

Anonymous

These are beautiful looks! The cobalt is just gorgeous on you. I'm a relative newbie here, but I don't get a chance to post much. Life just gets in the way. Often I take pics but never get around to posting them, then think they're not appropriate for the current season/weather (Aida, I have a few "hot Fall" pics somewhere on my phone. I didn't post because my hair changed and the pics no longer seemed current). And then there's the quality of pics--mine are often rushed and not that great. Also, like Donna, I sometimes hold back on comments because I feel I don't have the expertise-- but then when I hear Donna say that I'm floored because I always love reading her ideas and thoughts!

Thanks for sharing your gorgeous outfits and opening up this conversation.

Sal

Veteran

Great thread Peri. I go through stages with WIW - and I also miss some of the forum members who were very active when I first started on this forum. But as I will detail below, life changes, priorities change, and this is perfectly okay. I like looking at a variety of looks - people who are much more cutting edge than I can ever be, more tailored dressers, and more polished dressers. There are some women here whose style I love but they have different lifestyles, body shapes, climates and tastes to me, Angie of course being the main one. But I learn so much from all of you - whether you rock the small minimalist closet, or a large maximalist one, whether you live in a cold climate or the tropics.

I don't regard myself as an expert, and I sometimes wonder if my comments are really knowledgeable enough. But my eye has improved for my own looks through YLF. My climate is opposite to most on the forum and I repeat a lot of pieces.....but I hope that there are some forum members who like seeing how I can remix old and new, on a non-model figure. I try not to show the exact same pieces in the same way, but I have a blush sweater I wore at least three different ways in WIW as well as recently some black pants.

I have only ever belonged to two forums - this one - and a foodie NZ one which I joined about 7 years ago and am phasing out of now. There are one or two members there who are very"superior" and it has put me off. It was not such a welcoming, kind, busy, well managed forum as this one!! And my food patterns have changed - I am no longer doing as much home baking as I used to do, and we have lots of evening sports on so dinners are a little different...and it seems natural to be less involved.

Peri - I enjoy your posts because your climate and colouring are so different to mine. You are a stunning dark haired pale skinned elegant woman and you look so wonderful in those rich clear blues. Your nails look great too.

CocoLion

(website)

Veteran

It is always a treat to see beautiful you. I feel as if you're one of those I'd like to know better. You have a consistent, strong sense of style. You are stylish without being "trendy." I like the feminine jewelry, indeed the soft flower with the "sharp" is a fun juxtaposition! And your cobalt top here looks custom made for you. I admire how you know what suits you style and coloring wise, and you stay true to that. I'm really glad I caught your thread, as I want to stay connected with YLF and the best way to do that is to spend time here. If I'm not spending a lot of time here, I'm less likely to post a WIW or any thread, unless I have a specific nagging issue.

anne

Veteran

I was always mused "over reasons to post WIW if you don't need any specific advice" and haven't tended do do it much in 7 years of YLF!

Althougth I have never been hugely active, I feel less so at the moment because
- I used to be a SAHM. Even with the 3 little ones I had 7 years ago, there was more computer time than I have now as a working Mum with a busy life after work
-My phone doesn't work very well, and even when it did it I'm not good at typing on it
- We currently only have 1 computer at home and usually someone else is using it when I have some downtime
- I either rely on child photographers or mirror shots and know they aren't as good.
- I am relatively happy with my wardrobe within my own contraints, most of the time
- I repeat a lot. I thought about taking a photo this morning, ("Exact same outifit seen before except with skinnes not bootcuts because I packed the wrong clothes!" but even though I couldn't take it anyway as I didn't bring my phone - it isn't very interesting.)
- I have to admit to wondering if I should post anything at all as I dont feel I have enough to contribute to others for all the reasons above and because I always take too long to think about things!

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