More Collar Popping! - YouLookFab Forum

Hey all, I am new here my name is Heini
I've noticed a lot of collar popping threads here and that's just my thing! I love to wear my collar up all the time! Anyway I came to ask on your thoughts of this little situation that occured today!
I was taking my daughter to school (She's 16) she's in the last year of high school, anyway they have just changed the uniform for the school, they now have to wear polo shirts and jumpers, I took her to school this morning, she had all of her buttons undone and her polo shirt untucked underneath the black jumper (you could see it under the jumper), then on the way to school I noticed she upturned the back of her collar in the car, she knew that I was watching when I did it too, I think she's starting to copy me because I had my collar upturned today in a shirt I was wearing too. Anyway; I picked her up this evening after she finished and I noticed her collar was all the way up, she got into the car with a detention slip for uniform, I read it and it states: 'Informally dressed, collar up and buttons undone' I was fuming! It's a polo shirt! Do you think they should let them wear it how they like? The collar up looks good, it doesnt always look scruffy! What do you lovely people think about this?
What would you do if it was your daughter?
Thanks xx

12 years ago

Anonymous

While I don't see anything wrong with her popping her collar, I wouldn't fight the dress code on this. It's ridiculous, but they want everyone to look "the same" (even though everyone I know who wore a uniform managed to convey all sorts of socioeconomic class and clique values even though they were all "dressed the same").

Beth Ann

Veteran

It strikes me that the more we expect everyone to be the same, the more we see every tiny difference and variation. Sigh.

I love a popped collar, and remember the last time turned up polos were fabulously fashionable!

Welcome to the forum!

Heini Makinen

Active Member

Yeah there is no individuality anymore!! She should be allowed just to have the collar up?! It doesn't even look messy, I love the look myself and I'm persuading her to keep it up lol, what do you think? Do you think she should be allowed to have it up Beth?

How about that can be her little routine when exiting school -- buttons undone and collar popped! I know what you are getting at with the ridiculousness of arbitrary rules, but I don't think that setting her up to tilt at the administration's windmills will be very satisfying for her.

I love that she was looking to you for a little fashion inspiration! I would not have been caught dead following anything my mom did when I was 16! The rule seems really silly, what does a pop collar have to do with school? But what do I know my kids give me the advice, which always involves pink and twirly dresses. What did your daughter say about the detention? I am thinking that she thinks it pretty silly because her collar was still up, all the way up at that. I think I would stay out of it, let her figure out what works for her.

Gigi

Hi, Heini,

I don't have any kids, so you can take my advice with a grain of salt. If it were my daughter, I would probably explain to her that life is unfortunately full of arbitrary rules, and the key is determining which rules to fight and which rules to break. Since the dress code rule is a legitimate rule made by the school for a good reason, and since they do have the right to enforce their own rule (though you could argue about its effectiveness), I would vote for following the rule. If it were a rule that really clearly hurt people (like the rules that discriminated against black Americans in the sixties), then you would fight the rule. So I guess I would use it as a teaching moment to show her the difference. Just my two cents (and that's literally about all the money I have right now...!).

She now just puts her collar up in the morning before school and leave the buttons undone and leaves it up when she goes into school but she puts it down in lessons and just puts it back up at break times, and of course has it up when she comes home lol, it's just weird that the kids are allowed all the buttons undone on the polo shirt and the shirt untucked (even under a jumper) but she can't put the collar up, it's craziness! X

Collar

Member

I have seen many private schools with strict uniform and dress codes not care about wearing the collar up. As long as the student was wearing the proper uniform wearing the collar up should never be a means of detention or being written up, I would fight that with the board myself...pop the collars high!

7 years ago

ChrisM

DD needs to realize that battles need to be chosen. The old saying goes “choose the hill you want to die on” which simply means some things are worth fighting for, others aren’t worth it, so choose your battles wisely,

And, lucky for you, 16 is an ideal age for you to stop fighting her battles for her.

She’s 16, she knows the rules. The admin has indicated that they won’t tolerate her mini-rebellion. Is this worth battling? Her choice. Detention? That might be the price. Let her figure it out.

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