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Moms of grads?

Helena

Veteran

Hi all, wondering if any of you have a child who is supposed to celebrate a milestone graduation this year, and if you've come up with any brilliant ideas for virtual celebrations?

My son is graduating from Grade 8 this year; this is a big deal in our area, with a 'prom lite', ceremony, and whole-school clap-out for the Grade 8s as they leave on their last day. I'm heartbroken as I've been visualizing this clap-out since my Ryan started Grade 1 and the tradition was instituted in his then-new school. I'm not a big sentimentalist but I've attended and shed a tear every year, even when I don't know many of the kids in that year!

We will do a family Zoom party, get him his "suit" (a full retro Adidas tracksuit has been requested *rolls eyes*) and I'm hoping the school will do something - but starting to think about ways we can make it really special.

Anyways, just starting this to share ideas in case anyone is in the same or a similar situation - or even just emotions about it. I know, first world problem, but there it is - I'm just so sad about it.

Thanks xx

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16 replies

Latest reply was from April

JAileen

Veteran

Hey, I like the idea of the Adidas track suit!

On our local tv last night they showed yard signs a company was making to commemorate the grad. It seemed nice.

Our son is in his 30s now, but we took him to Disneyland for 8th grade graduation. My brother shamed us that we had never taken him. We had ten people in three generations, and it was fun. I personally prefer real things, which Disneyland is not.

Echo

Veteran

Our school does an 8th grade promotion ceremony like that, too, My son is graduating high school this year. Our school does the clap-out for graduating seniors, and it breaks my heart that my son won't get to walk down the hall in his cap and gown with the whole school cheering for him. Our school is still looking to do a ceremony later this summer, if possible. In the meantime, we're doing yard signs and I've ordered a t-shirt for him about the quarantined senior class. We are not planning on celebrating until we can at least have immediate family over (fewer than 10), so no virtual suggestions from me. But we'll have a cake at home and a party/game night with just us.

I just wanted to share in your disappointment. It really is hard when they're hitting milestones that cannot be celebrated the way we were all anticipating. I am also worried about college in the fall and whether students will be allowed to return. I don't want to endanger anyone, but I hope my kids will be able to have "normal" university experiences!

nemosmom

Veteran

I haven't been through this, so it might be a ridiculous suggestion, but what about putting together a slideshow of photos of him and his friends from school over the years and playing it for your family zoom party?

Helena

Veteran

JAileen, I love the idea of a road sign ... maybe a 'honk for Ryan's grad' sign or something Hopefully the neighbours wouldn't kill us for that haha!

Echo, huge hugs ... bad as Grade 8 feels, high school grad is worse ... such a momentous milestone, especially if college/uni will take them away from home. Lots of love and fab ideas; I hope they get their summer ceremony! xx

Helena

Veteran

I love that idea Nemos!! Maybe I could even make it into a YouTube video (with an unpublished link) and it could be shared with all of them. Thank you!

Laurie

Veteran

Slideshow great idea, photobook from Snapfish or other, or a good old fashioned photo album that you can write details in (because you will never remember all those kids at that birthday party 5 years from now).

I just ordered a banner to hang on our garage for my military academy grad (he's going to kill me) that is a fundraiser from one of the regional parent association chapters. There were yard sign options too. I imagine we're going to see a ton of these things in the coming month.

I have seen photographers offering services for porch photography, etc. - perhaps you could get someone to professionally shoot from a distance? I have requested this from a friend who is a professional photographer, in the hopes that we can get my son into some sort of uniform (all of their possessions are back at the Academy currently with no clear plan for retrieval...) and that we can be outside during the virtual ceremony in late May.

Anyone have a good idea for a program to make a slideshow? I am on a PC not a Mac.

Helena

Veteran

Laurie, great ideas and I'm sorry about your son's grad being disrupted I'll ask DH about a slideshow tool, but could good old fashioned PowerPoint be an option? It's got some much-improved design prompts now ...

Eliza

Veteran

Poignant how many important rituals and celebrations are necessarily impacted by our efforts to navigate this virus. How about asking close connections to write him a note (via email or snail mail) and gathering the congratulations, photos or shared memories in a book or album. Good way for folks to be able to share the fun.

Staysfit

Veteran

DS is scheduled to graduate from University on May 8th. All grandparents are still alive and had planned on attending in person, but we are now going to have a virtual party. DS refused to order the graduation regalia, so he will wear a suit. Hopefully he will shave because he hasn’t had a haircut since Thanksgiving!

I am particularly proud of DS. Some may remember that he has Autism, and I was not sure he would be able to manage college out of state. He did and I am confident that when it’s possible, he will get a job in his chosen field and be able to support himself as an adult,

Echo

Veteran

Stays fit, that is wonderful news! Good for him for not only going to University, but graduating, too. I'm so sorry the celebration will be different from what everyone wanted and expected.

This would have been a big year for us, as my oldest is graduating with his associate's, and my second son is graduating high school.

I truly wonder if schools will go back normally in the fall. I teach, and while we are striving to educate online, this is an especially bad situation for students with special needs and many others with virtually no supervision at home. We cannot follow IEPs adequately and so many students are falling behind. A six month break and questions about the fall means we will essentially have lost much of an academic year, which many students can scarcely afford.

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

My niece turned 18 today. My sister had a bunch of us send in little 10-second videos wishing her happy birthday that she stringed together to one 12 min video (some people were over on time—no problem). She also set up a table in the garage with 8 perfectly arranged individual packaged desserts and beverages, with sanitizer and wipes at the end of the table. The birthday girl had no idea her friends were coming over until she stepped outside & there they were. They set up lawn chairs around the driveway, all correctly distanced. My niece was so overwhelmed that she cried.

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

Oh Helena, I can't even talk about this yet. My son is graduating from high school and my daughters are graduating from 9th grade - which is the end of middle school here. One is changing schools and her classmates whom she has been with for three years will change somewhat. (In Israel classes tend to stay together year after year.) Plus the last month of school is usually full of fun parties and whatever in an ordinary year. Do not know what will happen and I am sort of hoping some celebrations might still take place during the summer, but for now it is all Zoom School all the time. #commiserationifnotsolutions

Laurie

Veteran

FashIntern - that is a great idea, the short videos. I'm going to do that - thank you! Maybe even incorporate them into the slide show, or at the end. Love it. Very sweet that your niece got to see her friends. We're all desperate for connection, I think.

anchie

Veteran

Oh, this is a sore topic for me. My son is supposed to graduate from university next month, but now everything is uncertain. He doesn’t have his final exams or dissertation timeline scheduled yet and it will most likely get delayed. He is studying in UK and even if he manages to finish his education I don’t know how to bring him home. Borders are closed and there are no flights. Missing the graduation is actually last of my worries. I just want him home safe.

karen13

Veteran

Hugs to all of you and all the people who are getting shortchanged on their milestones. Some great ideas here.

Commiserating - My DD is home remote learning for the end of her sophomore college year, wondering if there will be an actual junior year, much less the college life she has worked so hard for.

She, her roommate and their friends are staying in touch with FaceTime, but definitely not the same. And don't get me started on Zoom lectures . . . but best alternative I can think of.

I think her college is about to switch to pass/fail for grades this term, which hurts her as she is doing so well in all her classes, because she is working so hard. (Forgive me a tiny Mom brag moment - she just was told she doesn't have to take her stats final because she has scored so well all term on the tests, apparently a rare concession from the prof, and she actually said "Maybe I should take it anyway to make sure I really understand it well enough.") So many can't learn in this environment - she voted in support of pass/fail despite not needing it herself. And at least she has time for things to straighten out. My heart goes out to the graduating kids.

April

Veteran

Hmm, yes, we are experiencing this as well.

For those of you who don't know my family story: I have one son, 23, who went off to college in 2015 planning to be pre-med. In his first semester, he decided what he really wanted was to go to art school (!!!) and he applied, was accepted, and transferred to the School of Visual Arts in New York City. He started over as a freshman so he could get the full four-year experience.

So five years later, he is finally graduating this month. With no ceremony.

He is a Man of Few Words so I don't know how he feels about this in his heart of hearts. I know how I feel about it - it dodges the bullet of having my family publicly disappoint him one more time by not showing up for him when he has a milestone in his life.

He doesn't even care any more, but I care.