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Menswear for the anti-fashion, anti-shopping man

Ann in New England

Husband is a jeans and t-shirt guy, cares not one whit about fashion, is unhappy with his weight. He is self employed, doing active work that requires tough workwear like Carhart. He's the kind of guy who owns one pair of jeans, and when those rip, he goes out and buys another pair of 32x32 without trying them on. It doesn't matter if they fit well or not, that's his size and he's sticking to it (they are usually too big).
But, we're planning a long weekend in New Orleans next month and he brought up the fact that he could use some clothes. But where to shop? I love Nordstrom, but he is turned off by the more fashion-forward, brightly-colored and patterned shirts that seem to scream from that department.
I'd love somewhere with a staff that would be good about pointing him to things that are fashionably simple and classic. He'd like Madewell, I think, if they carried men's clothes.
Any ideas?

Shopping

18 replies

Latest reply was from viva

Laura

If you have a guy who is rather resistant to change, it is your opportunity to go and motivate him. Tell him how dashing he looks in certain things.

Have you considered Banana Republic, Bench, Calvin Klein, Cole Haan, Haggar or Jacob? They seem to have a very good line of refreshingly dashing spring shirts in pastels for men.

Ann in New England

Laura, thanks. See, "refreshingly dashing spring shirts in pastels" is exactly what he hates. Browns, greens, blues, and charcoals are as much "color" as he enjoys. So he resists walking into a store that features the "dashing" and "colorful."

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

Wait, Madewell does carry men's clothes, right? Is that only online and not in stores? how about J Crew, since they are owned by the same folks and have a similar vibe.

Banana Republic is a good thought. Men's wearhouse, too - their ads focus on suits but they carry a nice selection of more casual items too, at least around here. Not sure what your budget is, but if he likes classic, Brooks Brothers is as classic as it gets.

Ann in New England

Thanks. I didn't see men's clothes at Madewell, but then again, I wasn't really looking. I'll go back.
Banana Republic might work. I think Brooks Brothers is too classic.
I would start a Pinterest board for men's wear I think he might like, but my Pinterest friends might think I'm pinning up for other reasons, LOL.

Classically Casual

Veteran

Do you have time to do some practice online shopping for him, sort of to get his shopping juices flowing? That way he doesn't have to go anywhere for this first, very gentle iteration. (I have luck with the Tommy Bahama brand for tops. The quality is very good, and most of it is pretty classic and comfortable for DH.). It's at Nordy's, so free shipping/returns.

Ann in New England

Good idea. It's Triple Points this week, so maybe I can convince him quickly.

Thistle

Veteran

I'd take him to Farm and Fleet if he lived by me . . . Otherwise, I would try for Nordies. You can always look on line first.

Kohls might be another option. They carry Levis.

My DH lives in Levis and tees from LLBean and Land's End. His "dress up" clothes are a pair of dress slacks from Kohls and a couple wrinkle resistant shirts that have probably gathered dust since he last wore them . . .

Rambling Ann

(website)

Veteran

Zappos and Nordstrom free shipping are your friends. Put stuff in the cart, then let him take out what he doesn't like. DH needed a new business coat and slacks fast, and had no time to shop. I picked, he rejected. Together we found something in his comfort zone.

rabbit

Veteran

I'm easing my guy in with H & M. They have lots of reassuring denim, blues, and gray and casual jackets and knitwear but more trendy cuts of pants and shirts. Although I'm not sure about their size range, and the items won't last as long as Carhart.

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

Lands' End, LL Bean and Eddie Bauer all make solid stuff that might suit him since he's used to Carhartt and such. The first two are only online, unless you're near an outlet store, so you'd have to plan ahead and order some stuff. That might not be a bad idea, if he really dislikes shopping - you could order a bunch of stuff for him to try and he could try them in the privacy of home rather than having to deal with the mall. Just don't let him pull the thing my DH does and not 'get around' to trying stuff on until after the return period has ended and it sits there for a year before it gets donated to the thrift store unworn. (Sigh.)

Daria

Maybe Uniqlo will appeal to him? Although it might be too classic based on what you describe.

nancylee

Veteran

If you know his sizes, I'd order some "tasteful but not too fashion-y" items from Banana Republic or JCrew and let him try them on at home. There is something about undressing in a store that really inhibits a lot of guys. Trying the clothes on at home gives them privacy, and they don't have to "deal" with the salesclerks, etc.

Good luck!

Anonymous

Ann, description of husband, same, same, same, etc., except for the weight, I guess your husband is very slim?
While he may need a few truly fancier department store type things he could probably use some nicer versions of what he usually wears too. Better sporting goods stores, like REI, and maybe Patagonia? usually have a few shirts and pants, that while decidedly casual are nice enough for many occasions. He might like some of the more casual clothes at Brooks Brothers too, sport shirts, etc. Orvis might be good too although I've had less luck with them than the others.
I don't think he should feel like he has to turn into a different person for the trip, I'm thinking he always looks pretty good to you, and already if the clothes are new he'll look great.

Ann in New England

Thanks for the great ideas, everyone. Husband used to be slim, but is probably 20 lbs heavier than where he's comfortable. The idea of buying things and letting him try them on at home is a good one. He also has sticker shock, so if he doesn't know how much things cost, he may be more likely to like them.

REI is also an excellent suggestion that I had not thought of. I remember now that he used to wear a lot of Ralph Lauren when we first met, purchased by his other, I'm sure. Maybe I'll revisit that brand.

DonnaF

Veteran

Seems like a lot of men are in this *club*, lol. I'm turning into DH's Personal Shopper if I want him to look halfway decent. Online, Nordstrom also tells you what cut the shirt is, i.e., how fitted. My DH has very broad shoulders and biceps from working out and has an IT natural body shape, so he hulks out of fitted shirts. The Nordstrom description isn't foolproof, however, just as its size descriptions for women's clothing and shoes isn't foolproof either.

I think DH has a tendency to *save* those nice shirts I got him, so maybe I'll take a trip to REI for nice gear-ish ones. Anything would be better than the cheapo t-shirts he is prone to wear.

Windchime

Veteran

Your DH and mine sound a lot alike in their approach to dressing. (Mine loves Carhartt, too.)

Do you have a Nordstrom Rack near you? It's much more casual feeling than the department store. I brought DH there to look for jeans for him. We didn't find jeans that day, but he did try on a pair of shoes which he bought and loves. Now he actually suggests checking the Rack when he needs something.

We've also found things for him at Eddie Bauer, Old Navy, and Men's Wearhouse.

Olivegreen

Second the Sporty/Gear shop suggestions. I have sent him phone pics of shirts and such from REI, Columbia, and Eddie Bauer, for approval.
The Territory Ahead, which has a print catalogue, has some stuff he loves, sort of Indiana Jones vibe, which is great for travel.
Have fun in the sun. It was 80 in the South yesterday. Lotta pale legs.

viva

Veteran

Had to laugh at your comment about cost. My DH is a neanderthal about clothing cost for himself. He is completely supportive of what I buy for myself, but when he needs clothing, he still looks for the sale rack where he can get two shirts for $20. Ugh! And he has a challenging build, heavier torso and short legs, so he can be tough to buy for - especially given his generally anti-fashion stance and his cash-scrimpiness.(He's not in work like your DH, but he teaches elementary school - so he has a similarly anti-fashion job, and one that requires durability more than style. It creates a real challenge for us, doesn't it?)

I have found Eddie Bauer to be a great intro brand - pricing is good, choices are nicer than t-shirt and jeans but not as fashion-y as Banana Republic for men, and they have a range of fits (BR and JCrew are great for tall, slim men (ie, young) but not so great for DH).

God, men can really move slowly into the fashion realm, can't they? Whew. I have definitely found that LOTS of compliments on a good outfit can really help move the dial.

ETA: One more thing. Once he started realizing the appeal of nicer clothing, he told me he preferred to shop alone (at Eddie Bauer -- now that is the only place he goes haha) - because I make him anxious. (ME???? :)) When he brings things home, I give him my thoughts and occasionally we need to do some tweaking. Because he still cannot resist that darn clearance rack.