Lindy West: "I don’t want the people who love me to avoid the reality of my body."

minimalist

In this excerpt from her new book, Shrill: Notes from a Loud Woman, Lindy West describes poignantly the pain of growing up fat in a society that fears and disdains bodies it deems imperfect.

http://www.theguardian.com/lif.....lindy-west

"Society’s monomaniacal fixation on female thinness isn’t a distant abstraction, something to be pulled apart by academics in women’s studies classrooms or leveraged for traffic in shallow “body-positive” listicles (“Check Out These 11 Fat Chicks Who You Somehow Still Kind of Want to Bang – No 7 Is Almost Like a Regular Woman!”). It is a constant, pervasive taint that warps every woman’s life. And, by extension, it is in the amniotic fluid of every major cultural shift."

Your thoughts?

9 years ago

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6 replies

Latest reply was from rabbit

Veteran

Well, if Lindy said it then it must be true:) I havent read her book yet but I've loved Lindy West way back to her Stranger days! Love her fierce attitude and humor.

9 years ago

Ledonna N.

Veteran

Hmm sounds like an excellent read. Have to check to see if it's at the library. It is a constant battle to reprogram our brains to think that we are enough.

9 years ago

rachylou

Veteran

I don't know what to say. I was raised in Hippieville, 'free to be you and me.' I don't think I was properly exposed to these social pressures about fat and good looks. But I do believe there is social pressure in any group, and you have to decide what you'll accept and what you won't - and that's on you. I remember going to this mother/daughter hippie camp. Anyways, I did this one big hike that my mom wasn't up for. All these women were pressured - by others and themselves - to swim nude in this icy lake. I remember one of the counselors trying to tell her tween daughter 'there's nothing wrong with your body' when she wanted to wear her swim suit.

Anyways, not only was I not gonna strip down, I had no intention of swimming in ice water either. So with no mom for company, I sat by myself. And I remember overhearing that same counselor remarking on how I was the most self-contained person she'd ever met. I AM incredibly self-contained. This is both good and bad. I don't have any deep bonds that can only be forged by a shared hazing experience. No one is gonna help me bury bodies. But I take it upon myself, you know?

9 years ago

Ledonna N.

Veteran

Rachylou you made me laugh hehehe. So much of what you say rings true for me as an adult. I was a conformest. I had to learn how to how to be selfcontained.

9 years ago

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Rachy, that's so interesting. In many ways I feel VERY self-contained (yes, I'm the one who happily spends 2+ months on a solo camping and photography trip across the US). And I'm very comfortable with marching to my own drum in lots of ways. I wish that extended more to my self-image when it comes to body and appearance. For me, it varies from day to day.

A few years ago, I joined some new friends -- women I had met only a week earlier -- at a wonderful spa in the mountains in New Mexico. We got massages and agreed to use the "no swimsuit" women-only hot tub at the spa. One of the women models nude for her own self-portraits, and the other was raised in a very hippie culture, so they didn't blink at the prospect. I, on the other hand, was raised by a quite conservative, reserved, modest family, and I've never been terribly comfortable being naked, even just by myself around the house. Well, I swallowed my pride and stripped down with the others and dunked myself in that hot tub. Within a few minutes, I'd lost most of my self-consciousness and it actually felt pretty normal to be there that way. That felt like much more of an organic bonding moment, because there was no pressure to conform. I was invited, but there were no expectations of conforming, you know?

So let's hear it for the self-contained!

9 years ago

rabbit

Veteran

Heh, I remember one lightbulb moment involving nudity. We were hiking in Crete and came upon this little beach which was frequented by nude Northern Europeans. Mostly nude Germans of all shapes and sizes who were my grandparents age. It shook me right out of my 'bikini bodies are in glossy magazines and I fall short' mindset and into a 'nude bodies are what we have because we are animals, and aren't we lucky to be alive and to spend a beautiful day on the beach' point of view. I had been feeling slightly self conscious on the public beaches earlier but stripped down and joined the smiling ladies wearing only their hats, and the water felt awesome.

9 years ago

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