Learning to dress - YouLookFab Forum

These kind of posts pop up continuously here on the forum. I guess it's time for another because I feel SO EXCITED about everything I've learned so far as a newbie fabber!

I can totally relate to Yellowgirl in this post from six years ago (https://youlookfab.com/welookf.....le-evolved).

My style is evolving from "not caring > caring > realizing how awful I truly looked > clueless about what to do > starting to put the pieces together > learning to dress myself appropriately > getting an inkling of what I want my style to be > just staring to figure out how to express it > catching a clue > starting to have fun".

I am currently somewhere between "clueless about what to do" and "starting to put the pieces together".

Some of the most important changes I've done is realizing that my closet is a work in progress. I am no longer looking for "the final" sweater, that will go with everything and every occasion, and stay with me indefinitely. (I really thought like this).

I'm no longer hung up on what's "my" colors and fits, and avoiding everything else.

I am no longer deliberately avoiding trends and fashionable clothes, feeling I wasn't a fashionable person anyway.

I'm thinking more in terms of complete outfits and capsules, both when getting dressed and when shopping.

I'm finally coming to terms with that it's a "package deal". Cool shoes is o' not so cool if the rest of the outfit is frumpy, and the hair is a mess. I am taking myself to the hairdresser next!

How is your style journey going? Would be great if any of the veterans in the other post would chime in with their updates!

7 years ago

Bijou

Veteran

Hi Synne, welcome to YLF. I like to think that I am on a style journey and don't really think I will ever "get there" because hopefully my style will evolve and change as I change.
I have found putting Angie's tips into practice have helped keep me focused on buying for the life I lead and also to be more considered in what I add to my wardrobe. The main thing I have learned is to buy in complements (outfits or things that can work together) and to buy what sparks joy - because when we feel good it shows in all facets of our lives.

Anonymous

Well put Bijou, I agree it is totally a journey and not a destination. As we age our life experiences change who we are in small ways and large. We find protection in using clothes as armor, we find joy in colors in the change of each season and passage of life, we learn to use clothing to mark milestones both good ( maternity) and sad ( loss of family/ Friends). Our wardrobe is truly a companion on our life’s journey so it too grows and changes.
Angie and the YLF Friends challenge me to get creative in use of texture, color,textiles as well as keeping me in the know about trends and forward thinking pairings as I move along in my journey. They offer warm support, a laugh, a smile, a chuckle and a chance to remember where I have been on this journey. I wish you “ Happy Trails”. ( how many remember that song..

cindysmith

I've had to un-learn how to dress. I went from a life in a major metropolitan area (Atlanta) to a small city (Shreveport) to a very rural area (Texas/Oklahoma state line). Thanks to YLF, I've been able to stay in touch with trends, vicariously, through all of you.

When I had a formal event last year (my sister's evening wedding), Angie & members here helped me put together an outfit that still felt like "me", yet consisted of pieces I could see myself using in far less formal ways in the future. I'm pretty sure I could not have done so on my own.

YLF has also been instrumental in getting me to think more about my purchasing habits. I'm not as haphazard anymore. I mostly reserve my impulse purchases (floral jeggings, purple garments) for thrifted work clothes. My job is brutally hard on my clothes; with stains, rips, and goat-chewed holes being just a few of the myriad hazards.

For my off duty life (which, thankfully, is a bigger share of my time than days at work), I've learned to put thought into purchases to reduce churn/turnover in my closet. I've also started thinking more in terms of capsules than an entire closet full of garments. It makes it easier to get dressed when I think in terms of "today is for lounging and a wee bit of housework" or "many errands, lots of moving around", because these types of days involve totally different types of clothes for me since I started hanging out here. There's a lot more emotional & physical comfort in my life & wardrobe since i started thinking this way about my clothes.

I've also given up on "this is my forever style", because i realize that's just not realistic. We all experience shifts in preference over time; some major seismic shifts, others more subtle and/or gradual. I used to feel like a freak or phony when that happened; now I get that it's just evolution on a micro level LOL

Glad you found this wonderful corner of the internet, it's a beautiful place to hang out

Suz

(website)

It sounds as if you have come a long way in a short time! Congratulations!

I'm in the "having fun" and "refining my personal style" phase now. But that is only after six+ years on the forum. The first few years involved a lot of experimentation and many fashion flops. Sometimes I despaired, but as time went on I became expert at online shopping (necessary for where I live), began to feel more confident in my choices, and slowly, slowly but surely, took in the realities of my climate. This is still a tough one!

My style is still evolving and will continue to do so as I make changes in my life. Changing my hair colour caused a shift, and any moves and job changes also entail adjustments. That's great because it allows me to continue to have fun.

Jessikams

Cringing along with you at the phase “realizing how truly awful I used to look.” Old photos can be horrifying!

Cardiff girl

I just wish information such as can be gleaned from sites like this was around when I was younger,I think I would have spent my clothing budget better,however it’s stillgreat to be in touch with a whole globe full of ladies who whatever their age ,shape ,size and outlook thoroughly enjoy their fashion and support each other.So I’m at the acceptance stage,I ll never be fashionably perfect but that’s ok ,the fun is in the journey as they say.

Shoelover

Active Member

I am a rare breed in my town because most women my age don't dress like I dress. For me, clothes are part of my personality. When I'm happy, I express it with bold crazy colors and patterns. When I'm sad, you might find me in sweats or dark colors. I firmly believe age is a number and not a representation of who I am. I still shop Free People. It's my go to brand. I love the whimsy boho flair and I don't care what anyone thinks. If I am drawn to an article of clothing then I go with it. My friend only wears white, black and tan. Occasionally she will throw in a pale pink. My closet is a rainbow! Today I bought lavender shoes! I say if it makes you happy, go with it!!

After about 4 years on the forum, I am still a work in progress, and likely will always be. I have learned to refine my buying though, and to stick to a plan...where I used to shop for something to do and to combat stress or loneliness. I used to have a giant wardrobe filled with unrelated pieces, and lots of duplicates, and now I have a small wardrobe with many holes, but I refuse to buy just anything to fill those holes. I wouldn't say any of it has been fun, per se, but I do feel I am learning to refine my style at this point and be less influenced by what others wear. I the oddball here in that fashion and the business of fashion is serious stuff to me, and I have never been one to buy yellow shoes just for fun, IYKWIM. It's learning to balance needs and wants with disposable income and my value system vis a vis fast fashion /disposable fashion /ethical buying etc.

DonnaF

Welcome to the Forum and joining us on our respective journeys. After more than six years here, I am still learning and changing. Even without a weight change, the contours of my body seem to be changing and my feet are growing ever fussier so that means viewing various styles a little more differently.

This place has opened up what I will consider; these days I never say Never!

Wanna know something funny? Next year I will have to visit a few churches incognito. My denomination is very white and I am not, so that alone makes trying to be invisible a little hard. But I also have a huge magpie tendency (silver clogs, silver clutch, pewter cross-body, silver jacket, silver sweaters -- you get the picture) and love my pleather moto and fake fur vests. At this point, finding a boring Invisible Outfit will be like putting together a Halloween outfit. So far, I'm thinking black pants and maybe my ancient black clogs that I really need to discard.

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