Is there a place in your wardrobe for JFE? - YouLookFab Forum

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Dressing

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Is there a place in your wardrobe for JFE?

Anonymous

I think most of us spend time when we search for wardrobe pieces to find things we feel are as flattering on us as possible. This likely combines certain fits and colors.

What is your tolerance for JFE? Is there a place in your wardrobe for items that aren't conventionally flattering, just because you like the style or color? If it's in your closet, does is go overlooked and unworn because it feels a little off when you put it on?

Dressing

48 replies

Latest reply was from krishnidoux

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

I'm probably not the best one to answer as I feel like I have a lot of JFE items that I wear regularly. I'm more likely to overlook items that feel either too precious to wear on a regular basis or things that are just a bit fitted and look good but don't feel as good to me.

Jenn

(website)

Veteran

Yup. Come August, I don't care how flattering something is. If it's practical and it doesn't touch my skin, it's a keeper.

approprio

(website)

Veteran

Heh. I have a very high tolerance for the unflattering if I think it looks interesting. But I've noticed lately that this doesn't extend to colours that don't suit me. These are the pieces that give me the most trouble - a perfectly lovely item can go unworn because the colours wash me out.

Anonymous

Texstyle - I have plenty in my wardrobe too I feel this way about. Ha. I meant more of a decision at the time of purchase that acknowledges and decides not all things need to fit within a certain criteria. I'm also one who feels constrained about some fitted clothes.

Jenn - I totally get it. Like my shift dresses. I need them unfitted enough to be cool.

Approprio - it's amazing how much the right color(s) can make us either feel good or blah.

always trying

Veteran

When the temps go up my tolerance for the best fits, colors, etc. goes way down. It is difficult enough to find a few more flattering things in fabrics like linen, cotton, and blends without polyester, spandex, or any of the stuff that make things fit better to wear for times when I need to look better. For a lot of outdoor activities like dog events I just need to have things that keep me as cool as possible.

minimalist

Veteran

Yes! I'm experimenting with more of this lately. It started when I picked up a jacket that's the opposite of conventionally flattering. And started wearing it with wide-leg crops, which also wouldn't be anyone's suggestion for my figure's various quirks.

Then mom jeans, with men's dress shirts, untucked.

I feel just fine! As long as the choices are intentional, that is. Like Approprio says, the wrong colors don't work at all. So that bright orange silk scarf is banished to...I'm not sure yet. But after seeing selfies from eyewear-shopping when I was wearing that scarf, it's not coming near my face again. (Until it does.)

I'm also glad to see fashion bloggers bucking the old conventional flattery rules.

karen13

Veteran

I loved the idea of JFE when I first saw on YFL - it validated, and in a way gave permission, to me to adopt a style, fit or feature I loved, but didn't feel loved me. I have always done this for when function is more important than form (many sports, physical labor, some travel) - but I am now trying to adopt it a little bit in daily life. Not alway successfully, but it has increased my awareness of the option.

Greyscale

Veteran

I have plenty of room for JFE, but no room for things I don't love. Traditionally flattering isn't high on my priority list (in fact, I consciously avoid flattering items, in some sense). But I am trying to be ruthless about avoiding clothes that are ill-fitting in ways that bother me, things that don't make me feel fab. So yes, it has to be very intentional.

cindysmith

Veteran

I'm another one of those people who is willing to settle for whatever doesn't make me feel like I'm going to die of heatstroke in the late summer (which goes from the beginning of July to the end of September here in Texas). I will still avoid certain colors because they just look awful on me but if it's not tight and it's a natural fiber then it's a winner when it's 100F or hotter.

Aida

Veteran

Yep, lots. I think part of the key is figuring out which areas or types of garments you are more willing to go JFE with versus a traditional flattering fit along with knowing which ways of adding structure back in make you feel your best. I'd say most (nearly all?) days I've got at least one piece that's JFE versus what's traditionally flattering for me.

I'm personally more inclined towards JFE for tops/dresses, as well as for trends early on if it's something I really want to get wearing OR if it's simply a trend that's not traditionally flattering. Definitely willing to go JFE on fit but not really on color -- I don't make concessions for colors or patterns that don't make me happy!

EDIT: I also looove to play with proportions so that pretty much requires that I go JFE often

Jenni NZ

Veteran

Isn't JFE a rather amusing concept for those of us who have had a journey into YLF by means of not knowing what IS flattering? I found YLF by accident a year ago when I Googled "what does frumpy mean?" after the term had been used about one of my outfits by the stylist I saw in 2010, and also early 2016 when my best friend's husband said a dress of mine that I was giving away, after not liking how it looked on me but not understanding why, looked frumpy on her. It ended up with her 75 year old mother. The dress had pretty pink roses on it and when I bought it I was attracted by the print and by its fit and flare style. I still don't fully understand what is flattering on me or not, and posting pics can help me get your collective wisdom.

Aida

Veteran

Jenni, that's true! But it also does help to understand traditional fit so that you can break the rules just so

Emily K

(website)

Veteran

I feel like only a very narrow selection of outfits (or even ONE) can be MOST flattering, so everything else, really, is a sliding scale of JFE. I do not often choose the most flattering combo of style and color (because the style and type of fit doesn't appeal) so I must be very satisfied with dressing in a way that is just flattering enough--not that I often push the boundaries of weird proportion or whatever.

shedev

Veteran

After a period of JFE in terms of proportions, I've ventured back into more flattering fits. Hedev doesn't like it, and his opinion is important to me. I do wear colors that are JFE because they fit my persona. I don't wear ones that I feel look bad on me though.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

I have a pretty high tolerance for JFE within my own limits, which are similar to Approprio's (no colours that wash me out or make me look ill -- at least not near my face). I was also nodding with Greyscale's comment. It has to fit in a way that feels good to me. And I also agree with Aida. I like proportion play so that pretty much guarantees that sometimes things won't be "my best" from a conventional standpoint, but the fun is in making them look good to me (which rarely if ever means making me conform to some traditional idea of femininity).

Anonymous

AT - I agree summer can be tough, and staying cool needs to trump all else.

Minimalist - I like your comment about being intentional. And also, as many have said, color must make us feel good.

Karen13 - for exercise and such, I also err on the side of function.

Grayscale - Avoiding ill fitting is always a good goal.

Cindy - I'm with you in that when its over 100, it's critical to stay as cool as possible.

Anonymous

Aida - so glad to see you posting WIWs again. Yay. I like some structure in my outfits too.

Jenni - i think your outfits have been looking good, so glad you found your way here to work on your style to make you feel your best.

Emily - a continuum makes sense for flattering outfits, but preferences and function move us up and down the line.

Shedev - although we don't necessarily dress for others, it is nice to keep our partners preferences in mind. I do like to look good for my DH most of the time.

Suz - you keep quite current on styles, so I can see JFE comes into play until our eyes adjust.

Kate

Veteran

I think I probably wear a lot of items that fall in the JFE category because I'm attracted to garments that have interesting shapes that aren't conventionally flattering. What is non-negotiable for me is comfort.

Ledonna N.

Veteran

Nope, I have no time for what is think is jfe.

It's like being in an okay marriage or relationship.

That's not what I want. I'd rather be alone.

Sisi

Veteran

Interesting question! My tolerance for JFE is rather low but you know, sometimes you have to buy what you find. Last Winter I looked hi and lo for a simple woolen pullover (that is, pure wool, decent neckline, no embellishments - you think it's easy? well, it's not). Finally, exasperated, I bought a cashmere pullover with the right shape but in the the wrong color (beige). Well, I ended up wearing it rarely because it makes me feel dull.

Bijou

Veteran

I so love Ledonna's attitude. So right, especially when it comes to relationships.
I much prefer flattering to JFE, but I will happily compromise from time to time. An item does not have to be conventionally flattering if it is interesting or refers to something that I like. Stompy boots are not conventionally flattering, but I still like them because of their cultural reference and the fact that I can walk for miles in them.

anchie

Veteran

I am trying to get things as flattering as possible. Hated boxy and oversized trend because could not get it to look flattering enough. Never liked long over lean for the same reason also. I prefer tailored clothing because I think they are the most flattering on me.

LaPed

Veteran

I don't think conventional figure-flattery is at the top of my priority list? I do pay attention to colour, and generally won't wear colours I find unflattering, unless they're ones I really love and can't say no to. I tend to choose clothes on the basis of personality-flattery, rather than body. What an outfit communicates, the story it tells about you, is more important to me than how it looks, if that makes sense. The aesthetic aspect is just one facet. I can think of plenty of things that would look good on me, in terms of figure-flattery, but that are so "not me" I would not feel fab in them. I would be posing, so to speak.

Anonymous

Kate - comfort is definitely crucial. I will change if I'm not.

Ledonna, LP - the aesthetic must be one I'm drawn to. Like Bijou, I love a stompy shoe. Not always the most flattering, but very me, and something I expect I will always continue to wear.

Sisi - seems like everyone here, including me, can't get over color that makes us feel meh or off.

Anchie - I do like tailored, but not too fitted. Think it's very flattering on most.

The Cat

Veteran

Sure there is. At least for lines and styles. But not for colours. I need to feel I look good in the colours I'm wearing.
In my opinion, using your best colours is becoming more important with age. However, trying new lines and styles that may not be conventionally flattering, is fun and can contribute to a fresh look.

rachylou

Veteran

I feel like my whole closet is JFE, lol. I'm not really into flattering styles, harmony. Rebelling against my classical education, hehe.

Greyscale

Veteran

La Pedestrienne -- personality flattery! I love that idea.

Alexandra

(website)

Veteran

Interesting question. I don't quite get the concept of JFE as presented here. Things either are flattering, meaning they make me look like me (work well for my coloring and body type/lines) or they are not - in other words, it's a pass/fail. There's no failure by degrees, it just doesn't work.

FWIW, most of what I see here labeled as JFE is really not about "conventionally flattering" but rather *conventionally feminine* - many of those items are actually quite flattering on the right body type.

Aquamarine

Veteran

Not a fan of JFE. Those items are generally clean-the-house-or-yard items. Ledonna said it more eloquently than me.

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