In your happy place?? - YouLookFab Forum

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In your happy place??

Mo

(website)

Veteran

I was pondering this all last week, before Angie's post this morning based on Jayne's happiness factor. I realized I have so much less desire to shop, I feel great in what I wear, and everything fits. I am content with my wardrobe. It only took a little over 2 years and a few relocations between opposing climates
Also, I am so much better with letting go of the 'so-so' items and I think that makes a huge difference in having a closet you love. Lastly, I finally had the penny drop on less is more, quality over quantity. That was/is my biggest hurdle yet. But when I dress, I love my choices, and always feel like I have another great outfit ready to go. Yay!!

Book Club

22 replies

Latest reply was from Mo

Isabel

Veteran

That is so great ! It is amazing to me that the journey is so hard, isn't it ? We know, I think, what makes us intrinsically happy and what we are attracted to , but applying it to the actual life we lead is traumatic ( almost, LOL ).

I have been struggling with trying to choose 33 items for that last month or so. It finally hit me that I don't want to have all my accessories included, because I love them and they make me happy. And as I further culled my clothing ( especially the 15 extra camis that I really don't need ) , I realized that I too, love what I have and that it is very functional for my lifestyle. I am also not so sentimental or torn about donating something that just doesn't "quite ' work. I also have a very small "just in case " capsule. It feels good Mo !!!! Now , let's see how Summer goes....ask me then ! : )

rae

(website)

Veteran

Yay! Happy for you, Mo! I am sloooowly, maybe, getting there. I have a strong urge to shop right now for comfort/boredom/mental distraction, but I keep thinking of things in my closet that can be let go and that aren't quite perfect. As I get pickier, some of the past purchases reveal themselves as imperfect, and then I can hardly stand to keep them anymore. Oy! You are in a great place to not have this feeling and be really content. High five!

Marley

Veteran

Mo - I'm with you. I have basically been on SYC for over 2 years now - buying very, very little - and only with gift certificates or B-Day/Christmas money when I do - and I am sooooo enjoying my wardrobe! I realize that I don't need near as much as I thought that I did - and I have become very, very picky about what I bring into my wardrobe! There have been a few times lately that I have looked in the stores (because I have some Christmas gift certs!) - but there is nothing that has jumped out at me that I am just dieing to have! I have come home empty-handed but happy - and it also gives me something to look forward to - who knows, maybe when the spring fashions land in the stores I'll see something that is calling my name - but for now I am very content and feel really good with my current wardrobe.

CocoLion

(website)

Veteran

I think it is a spiritual thing to be content with what you have.

I feel this way about many aspects of my life. My 22 year old car, for example. But my wardrobe -- I seem to be always editing/purging, and searching and buying. I'm completely not this way about other aspects of my life, just my clothes.

The continuum between healthy pass time to distraction to obsession to addiction is a muddy one.

Mo

(website)

Veteran

Denise and Rae, good points about shopping to 'pass the time'. This may be a part of my current contentment with what I have. I am now back to work and have less of that spare time to pass that I've had. Coupled with more uniform wearing and less outfits daily. Interesting to think about.
Marley and Isabel, Yay on loving what you have!

Ingunn

(website)

Veteran

I totally agree with Denise, to be content is a state of mind, and one can practice getting there. I love hearing that you are content, Mo, and I guess it is due to your conscious effort to edit your wardrobe to become what you need it to be? Making the right choices isn't easy, but you seem to be very able to define what you like and who you are, which I think is very important if one is to learn how to curate a wardrobe successfully. My experimentation with capsules has taught me a lot, and I think this year will be very interesting "wardrobe-wise". I know a lot more about what I want, what I like, and how to mix and match what I have to keep my spending under control. I am in a happy place right now, and hope to keep it up!

Deborah

Veteran

Mo this is so good. I was drafting my thoughts on this same thing today. It's is such a good place to be...congratulations:)

Anonymous

You are so lucky Mo ,To be in your happy place. I have to admit to feeling a tiny bit jealous. At th moment I think I have a long way to go. You have obviously made a big effort to find your peace of mind. A lot of us get busy with so many aspects of our life that we neglect our style and it has the potential to have such a big impact on our sense of well being. I hope I can join you in the fullness of time, well done

cinnamon fern

Veteran

Yay Mo!

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

An inspirational point to have reached with your style! Well done!! Wear the heck out of your clothes and enjoy

Beth Ann

Veteran

I'm getting there. As a creative type, I love choices, so I've resisted the small wardrobe idea. However, I live and work with my family in a 1,000sq house and my budget is limited. Also, I think buying "items" instead of "wardrobe pieces" creates more style confusion on a grown woman than the teenage girl giving every trend a whirl.

What I do have since YLF? A wardrobe that "works" in most life situations. Items that play with each other in lots of ways. Better fits, and just the beginnings of better quality.

I'm on a shopping slow lane for a while, by choice, and I can pass by the "pretty good" and do without, waiting for the right thing.

You have done a beautiful job of creating a refined, organic and peaceful style, Mo!

shedev

Veteran

I'm really happy for you Mo. I'm closer to my happy place but not there yet.

Irene

Veteran

I don't feel like buying (clothes) anymore. Now I'm into make-up. I also had the perfume phase. I guess I'll be back on clothes-craving soon enough, but right now I'm enjoying my SYC, since I can indulge on other things.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Mo, that's terrific!

I relate very much to Denise's comments. I don't buy much "stuff" -- until it comes to clothes and shoes. My eye is always stimulated by new and interesting items, but I'm also trying to channel that compulsion into exploring how existing items can be mixed and remixed rather than always seeking out the new.

So interesting. This is learned behavior on my part, for sure. My mom was a big saver, not spender, but the one weakness she had was for clothes shopping.

At this point, I don't want to *quit* shopping or SYC, I just want to be more mindful and smart about what I purchase. I'm getting there. I think I'm also ready for another round of closet purging.

Raisin

Veteran

Mo, I agree with everything, and feel the same!

Mellllls

Veteran

Im sort of there too, and have been there for awhile. At the same time, you don't want to get stuck, because ten at some point you may tire of all your clothes at once. So I have made a goal to shop once a month to refresh.

Mo

(website)

Veteran

Thanks guys! And Mellllls, you are so right, too. I also am trying the once a month thing.

I agree that much of contentment is state of mind. Part of mine was realizing I really don't need half as much as I thought I did, and also making much more thought out buys all last year. Great to reap the rewards

Caro in Oz

Veteran

That's fantastic Mo. I felt that I was getting there then summer came along & I lost it:)
CL & IG are right it is a state of mind - being in the right frame of mind to choose wisely for your lifestyle, to choose quality & to wear the heck out of them as Angie says.

cheryl

Veteran

Way to go Mo! You have a lovely wardrobe that looks beautiful on you. I think the one buy a month will keep everything fresh and evolving for you to continue to be in a happy place!

Suz

(website)

Veteran

This is wonderful news. In the past year I have really seen your wardrobe come together in a new way. Your clothes look good, and feel like "you" and now you can be at peace, just adding slowly and subtracting items as they no longer fit your needs. Brava!!!!

CocoLion

(website)

Veteran

Mo I know you mentioned this but I do think moving often has helped you reach this level of contentment. I think it's to do with the work you've done. Moving really forces you to edit and THINK about what you will need. Plus when you unpack you have another chance to sort and edit everything.

I have a lot of space (frankly most of it unfinished) but I don't share it with anyone and I think it enables my situation. This means I'm not forced to limit myself as I should.

Although I did bring 1/2 of a large outdoor garbage bag to the thrift shop today. Inspired by some of Angie's threads this week and yours!

Mo

(website)

Veteran

I do think the moving helped the most in the 'what do I really need' department. Also, taking away that which doesn't really sing to you is a relatively new thing for me.
I used to only purge the obvious bad stuff. Now I purge the, ah it's okay but doesn't really do anything for my wardrobe stuff.
Just this week I got rid of a BCBG skirt that was a tad too short, my maxi dress that was a tad too big, and a purple velvet jacket I realized my willow & clay had essentially replaced. In the past I would have held on to all, thinking they would 'do' in a pinch.
Removing impediments is so freeing!!