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I was surprised to read today..

anne

Veteran

This

"Well,today in an overwhelming amount of states in the United States there
are laws in place which prohibit kids under the age of 18 from being
unescorted in malls and shopping centers. Gone are the days of dropping
your teen off at the mall for some unattended shopping, lunch and a
movie with friends."

https://www.professorshouse.co.....allowance/

(yes the URL shows what I'd been thinking about) I didn't look around much, though did find this other article

https://abcnews.go.com/Busines.....d=11701470

And thought I'd ask you about it. After all you guys are shopping experts!!

I was surprised this is not how we do things in Australia! It's fine for teenagers to be without adults in malls)

"

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24 replies

Latest reply was from elpgal

Jenn

(website)

Veteran

My son goes out unescorted with his friends all the time, including to the mall. He’s 17 now, and that really only started once he had friends old enough to drive (which is age 16 here). Our little town doesn’t have a mall, so they have to drive to one of the next cities over. Before that, though, they went to the lake or the ice cream shop on their own. And all the kids here walk to school, alone or with friends, starting at age 6 or 7.

I get the feeling things may be different in larger cities.

Helen11

Veteran

Wow - I have just started letting my 12 yo spend some time at the shops with school friends, without adults!
I'll feel lucky that we have this easy opportunity for him to increase his independence.

Anonymous

This was enacted in some locales because of teen on teen crime whether gang related or general mean girl bullying. Some unsupervised kids were also hassling seniors. Problem is there were no places for kids to socialize.
Interestingly enough- in my area- the anchor stores have left and the few stores that remain are those whose target population are teens and tweens. The stores that have been vacated are now being replaced with teen entertainment businesses ( arcades, paint ball, wall climbing etc.) so now they are back at the “mall”- go figure.
Problem is- we have to drive to 2 different states or travel long distance to NYC to get b&m stores to shop in.

rachylou

Veteran

Oh it’s a whole thing. Illegal to leave teens alone period - at home or outside the home. They certainly can’t babysit anymore. There’s a whole counter protest movement, ‘free range parenting.’

anne

Veteran

Rachy, I had heard about the free range parenting, and what it is reacting to, but not in the context of teenagers, more younger children.
And I have been trying to convince my 12 year old why I can't let her babysit yet. She's so great with kids and can't wait to!
Helen, I am glad too!

anne

Veteran

Efbgen, yes I did see an article about that violent side of it.

anne

Veteran

Jenn, we have good public transport where I live, which helps those who can't drive get around. I myself never drive into the city (where I work). But our local mall is near the bus and train too.

kkards

Veteran

anne--there is some truth to this, but mostly it's not true.
Yes, some malls have restricts kids under 18 without an adult, either all the time or at select times. But its some malls... there are approx 1,200 malls in the US...there a 4 indoor malls & 6 or so outdoor centers with within 1 hour of my house, only 1 restricts kids under 18.
(also, since malls are private property, most do not need to have laws restricting kids, they can just make it a rule)

deb

Veteran

There are 2 malls where gangs of unruly teens have caused such disturbance that the had to close the mall to all customers. Such a sad state of affairs

Sal

Veteran

I allow my sons to shop without me both in the street and the mall - they walk/bike to school alone or with friends and have done so since they were about 10. They strongly dislike shopping so only go in to buy the odd present, go to the barber or occasionally the movies with friends.

I much prefer street rather than mall shopping - but I do feel malls here are a bit safer for teens -although I have tried to teach the boys how to avoid trouble. Sadly we are getting more and more homeless and beggars here which can be a challenge to know how to handle if you are 13.

It is always such a shame when a small number of troublemakers spoil something for others. Really sad.

Echo

Veteran

We don't live close enough to a mall for my kids to even think of going, but the larger malls in the state often restrict hours that teens are allowed in the mall.

Ultimately, large groups of teens intimidate middle aged and older women, who are the bread and butter of most malls. Additionally, our malls have had vandalism and even shootings involving teens - always in the evenings.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

I have a lot of thoughts around this, but will hold off on my rant...

Suffice to say there is a mall where I grew up (and right across the street from the radio station where I’ve recently worked) that instituted a curfew policy for teens. No unaccompanied teens after 5pm on weekend nights:

https://www.baltimoresun.com/n.....y,amp.html

Note, Towson is a fairly affluent suburb of Baltimore, and a college town. If you can’t feel safe in that mall, where the heck can you? This is a nice mall — everything from H&M to Macy’s to Nordstrom to Burberry and other higher end luxury retailers.

This policy is not necessarily the norm in the states but it seems to be becoming more prevalent.

It’s sad. Yeah, let’s kick kids out of the malls and onto the streets with even less to occupy them, where it may be even more unsafe. Ugh.

Anonymous

This is my personal experience.

A very small number of malls in North Carolina have had issues with underage kids. I remember that those malls implemented a curfew. Perhaps an adult was required after the curfew?

These situations are the exception. I go to malls all the time. I have never seen a situation where an adult was required to accompany underage kids at the malls I frequent no matter what time.

Anonymous

No rules or laws here in Canada that I know of, but I didn't let my daughter to go off alone until she was probably at least 14 or so. I'd let her wander around with a friend if I was in the mall at the time, but not on her own. It didn't seem to be an issue (she hates shopping to this day). I am in our good mall quite often , and admittedly hate gangs of teenagers hanging around. I am there to get stuff done, not to hang out ,and they are just in my way , lol. As to the intimidation factor, I don't shop during the evening or on a weekend, so that pretty much takes care of that. Our downtown mall is a scary place to be - as it attracts gangs and street people who are more than just a little aggressive.

anne

Veteran

Hi everyone, am on my phone on the bus. Will respond more fully later. Big difference is that where I live most malls aren't open at night, apart from one night a week, or just a section that has a cinema. And I wouldn't let Dd15 be there at night without an adult.

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

Well, we used to get dropped off at the mall quite often at age 13-15 and to be honest, it wasn't a great idea back then any more than it is now. And this was in the daytime. My girlfriend and I were very often solicited by older adult men with ill intentions. Some worked at the mall, some just had time off I guess and were able to hang out. They'd say things like "you can't be only 14 years old" or other similar things. Offer us cigarettes - try to get us into a conversation. If we had been more naive it could have been disastrous on a few occasions. I lived in a fairly large city area but the main mall was in a suburb more on the edge of the city. I'm just glad my older siblings taught me to run the other way if ever in doubt of my safety. There were a few times when we did literally run away.

I realize it may be part of "growing up" and all but I don't know still if it was the best idea. Maybe if it's a larger group of kids but just two are pretty vulnerable.

kkards

Veteran

...i went back and read the article that anne linked to re giving your teenager a clothing allowance on professorshouse.com....interesting pro's and con's....but then i got to all this stuff about laws in the US about malls and teenagers and curfews and teenagers...and i started shaking my head...it was clearly written about the US about someone not from the US as it talked about state laws for things that are local ....best i could figure out is that the writers are Canadian as the contact address is in Calagry....which begs the question....why all the comments and "examples" about the US? certainly there are teenagers and parents in Canada?

anne

Veteran

Khards - interesting analysis of the article. I can relate to knowing that something was off when it comes to a local situation, and it was pretty clear as soon as you guys started responded that the information was basically wrong

I think what most of you are saying is that this is something that sometimes happens, but isn't the rule, and that it's usually for the evening, and that it isn't in the realm of state legislation but rules made the malls.

I have to admit my first thought when reading it was "what about teenagers who work at malls?" - do they need to be escorted to their jobs by adults! I guess there'd be exceptions for them.

elpgal

Veteran

Have to agree with Lisa. Our local mall with Bloomingdales and other high end stores got a metro stop in front of it and the huge gangs of loitering teens basically put a stop to actual shopping. The serious shoppers moved to a nearby mall and the stores (chicos, WHBM, Talbots etc followed suit). It houses a H&M and other smaller stores now.

Sal

Veteran

I have a few observations - mostly about NZ.

1) I don't think in general people are getting worse, or teenagers are getting worse. There have been gang issues around for at least 40-50 years in many parts of the world, and bullies, and teenagers with too much time on their hands. My husband was picked on as he commuted to school as a young teenager - my sons have never been - there are far less school fights than when I was at school. I think in the most part teens are getting nicer.

2) If we stay off the streets, paths, out of the malls etc that makes them more dangerous. The more people about the safer it is.

I would hate to live in a society where I had to drive everywhere because the streets or malls were too unsafe.

My sons get themselves to and from school on foot, walk to the local mall for a haircut or to the movies with friends, go to tennis alone etc... It is a really important part of gaining their independence to me - and teaching them how to handle any hazards they may encounter is also important. Sadly in NZ most of the violence or danger is in your own home - abuse or violence from family members, Mum's boyfriend, trusted friends etc..

Sorry a bit off topic but I feel really strongly that we give teenagers rights, responsibilities and treat them with respect and give them some options. Part of this is poor city design with too few options for recreation especially in poorer parts of towns.

rachylou

Veteran

It’s practically illegal for teens to work now, at least where I am. This is hard for me to imagine, because my first job was at 12 and I loved having jobs.

Laurie

Veteran

A little off topic, but has anyone seen the movie "Eighth Grade"? Beautiful movie with a terrific scene of the first time the 8th grade girl goes to the mall "alone" to meet up with some high school kids. Really recommend the movie!

Sal

Veteran

That sounds interesting Laurie.

Teens can work here from 16 and mostly work in supermarkets, McDonalds etc. before that they mostly work for friends and family eg lawns, babysitting,filing.

Therr aren't the options there used to be - and I think the workload at school and sport is higher too.

elpgal

Veteran

In the highly competitive area where I live, teens are busy building resumes for college admissions. So there are very few teens who have 'jobs'. They prefer gaining experience that is geared towards their desired major or extracurricular activity. Summer camp counseling is big as is unpaid interning in the various financial firms in the area. Very few teens will babysit or mow the lawn. Almost no one I know works in retail. I don't blame them, it's just the area we are in.