Ugh, I sympathize and commiserate. I really don't like the heat and humidity. We just had a couple of blissful summer days here -- lower humidity, cool nights, and getting up to the low 80s in the day time. But that is always short-lived in the mid-Atlantic.
I just go with shorts and tees on days when I'll more likely be out moving around in the heat. I also take shortcuts on styling my hair -- I'll dry the bangs and the crown just to get a little shape out of that part of my hair, and then let the rest air dry and go curly. Not ideal for my peferred style, but I'd rather give my hair a break since I'm washing it every day in the summer anyway.
I dunno, I'm spending so much time in bike shorts lately that I'm starting to not care what my legs look like in regular shorts, so I'm reaching that point of the summer where I'm desensitized to feeling self-conscious with more of me showing. At the start of the summer, I'm always a little freaked out by the idea of showing so much skin.
I love sack and shift dresses on other women, but they look HORRIBLE on me, so, sadly, not a style that helps me for hot summer days. And I think that dress Lisa posted is adorable, but again, I can't imagine it looking even halfway good on me.
I muddle through the summer somehow, and I have my moments when I actually feel like I look pretty good, but all in all, I'm mostly tolerating summer and not truly embracing it, stylewise. Wine on the patio sounds perfect.