How to get self control with eating

Alexandra

Vegetables - lots of them. Fresh or cooked. They fill you up, have all sorts of important nutrients, and hardly any calories. And many have a very satisfying crunch.

12 years ago

Deborah

Veteran

Anne get a blood test. I have struggled with iron deficiency for a long time and became very sick. I will try and pm you tonight as I do have a suggestion. It's something that is working well for me;)

12 years ago

anne

Veteran

Thanks Deborah, I look forward to it.

I am awaiting a letter from the Red Cross with test results- I was turned down from donating blood a couple of weeks ago.

12 years ago

Anonymous

Anne, If I remember from your last Birthday thread started by Angie, you're not much of a veggie or fruit eater.
What I would suggest then is just think of one or two vegetables that you might like and try adding them to a couple of meals a week. When you do try to replace some of the carbs in your meal with veg so that nearly half of your plate is veg and the other two quarters are carbs and protein. Try switching to more complex carbs too, like wholemeal spaghetti and rice and bread instead of the white versions.
Don't forget to make your meal portion sizes a little smaller too.
Fruit is good for you but some have more fruit sugars than others, so eating lots can mean more sugar intake. Try apples or pears . Also, Cherries are packed with iron too. I eat them like sweets.
I think generally it may be better to up your veggie intake though, and cut down a bit on simple carbs.

12 years ago

anne

Veteran

Dianne, it is true that I am not much of a fruit eater (I really only eat berries, and cooked apples, or tinned apricots or peaches) I am happy to eat enough of the veggies that I do like. The problem isn't that I don't know what to do - I have lost/maintained in the past pretty much by cutting down on refined carbs and sugar, as per your suggestions.
It is that I don't seem to have the will power atm to do the cutting down and substituting, at least not for more that a few days!
These are the sticking points

I am no longer cooking during the week- DH shops and cooks and has a meal waiting for me soon after I arrive home. Well except when he doesn't cook and gets take away (like tonight - and he got my favourite -Thai, because I had asked him to stop getting fish and chips. And I can't resist white rice when there is a Thai curry sauce to go with it). Mind you we have a take away budget for the month so I don't think he can do it more than one more time this month

I don't want to be too hard on him because it is a big adjustment for him to be looking after the kids and doing the meals every night (as well as doing his own work) Last week though, there were not very many vegetables in our meals at all. And I don't make things better by my frugal ideas for him - as in "why don't you turn that not very successful meat sauce into lasagna. I don't even like throwing out old donated white bread. Our overall budget is down quite a bit from when he was earning. I have thought of cooking ahead on the weekend but I have mostly been either too busy or too exhausted.

I used to sometimes cook wholewheat pasta and rice for myself, but the family really didn't take to it and it seemed too much effort. I am not that big on brown rice anyway - ate a lot of it in the 80's!

My workplace has a plentiful supply of crackers and biscuits. There are catered events from time to time and occasional leftovers to be had. My willpower is suffering.

I have been dealing with the emotional upheaval of moving by the odd spot of comfort eating - mostly weetbix.

As a child who was a fussy eater, I think I have developed patterns on feast or famine. If I didn't like the food available, I didn't eat much and then if I did, I stocked up. So I find it hard to not go into the stocking up mode when I see something I like.

12 years ago

Mo

(website)

Veteran

I don't much care for fruits or veggies, either. I tell myself to try and get in 3 servings a day, but often don't. I do often log my food, though, especially when I notice myself gaining. If you have to be accountable for it, it helps. Keeping track keeps you cognizant of what you're ingesting.
Alternately, if you can just move more, it can offset the increased calories. I notice when I move to FL and quit my active jobs, I tend to gain a couple pounds right away in the first few weeks. Simply the lack of movement catching up with me.

12 years ago

elpgal

Veteran

Anne, I think you have pinpointed why you want to eat carbs - new routines, new stressors, lack of familiar options. Be kind to yourself. Your will-power is a finite resource and right now your mental reserves are being utilized to deal with your new routines thereby leaving you with not enough control re. food. To jumpstart weight-loss, can you and DH sit down together and make a meal plan for a week. Make sure to budget plenty of take-along snacks for you to avoid temptations. Are you getting enough sleep? Enough sunlight ?- I know you work in an office now. A lack of sleep is associated with food cravings for carbs.

12 years ago

Gaylene

Veteran

Anne, I suspect the biggest reason I was able to lose weight relatively easily was because I really was careful about my portion size. I did try to adjust my diet so it more or less followed the Mediterranean diet (lots of vegetables, complex carbs, nuts, seeds, fish, etc.), but I also knew, if I was going to keep the weight off, there was no point avoiding certain foods that I and my husband enjoyed. That was why portion control was so important to me.

Some of the things that helped me control my portion size:

Use a smaller plate so smaller portions still look "regular" sized.
Drink a glass of water a few minutes before eating. I liked mineral water, so a wine glass of mineral water with a squirt of lemon became my "cocktail". I also drank water during my meal.
Force yourself to eat slowly. I deliberately tried to talk between bites so I often had food left on my plate when everyone was finished.
Eat "forbidden" foods and snacks by dividing a normal size portion in quarters. Eat the first quarter, then deliberately make the choice to eat each of the other quarters, one by one. I found quite often by the time I had eaten 1-2 crackers, I was able to decide that I really didn't want to eat the remaining ones at that time. The same for chocolate--my particular weakness. One or two squares usually satisfied my craving, especially if I knew I could eat the remaining portion if I deliberately chose to do so.

Hope some of these ideas work for you.

12 years ago

Diana

Veteran

Anne, are you bringing your lunch to work? If not, I highly recommend doing that. That way, you have built in portion control (use containers that you know the size of, that way you can't overfill them) and healthier options. I bring my lunch almost every day, mostly because most of the food options around my work either taste terrible or are terribly unhealthy. You do have to plan ahead a little bit, either by preparing something over the weekend (like soup) for lunches, or saving a portion from dinner. Or you could buy healthy sandwich or salad fixings to take for lunches. And don't forget healthy snacks. I often take a small portion of nuts or trail mix for late afternoon.

Anyway, my approach is basically: always eat breakfast (I get cranky if I don't!), have a reasonable lunch brought from home, and then eat whatever I want for dinner. Granted, I don't tend to make very unhealthy things very often for dinner, and I do love my veggies, but I still don't worry too much about it.

Re: white vs. brown rice. I do eat white rice (especially with short grain rice, where I don't think brown works at all), but one thing I have found that works really well is mixing equal parts brown and white long grain rices (I like basmati) in the rice cooker. The texture is better (and it reheats better than all brown) and you get at least half the health benefits from eating brown rice. I don't really have to adjust anything in my rice cooker, although it is better if you let it sit a bit after cooking; if you are making the rice on the stove you might have to play around a bit with time and water.

Having a soup or salad, and a glass of water, before dinner helps fill you up too and prevents too much overeating. You might want to consider prepping something like that over the weekend (or make a ton one night and freeze it) so that it's available when you get home. They can be used for lunches too!

ETA: This website, Just Bento, has a lot of ideas for bento-style lunch boxes with calorie counts and ideas for make-ahead things. I think she lost weight by doing this. The idea is that if you limit the size of the box you can't overstuff it. Even if you are at home and don't technically need to make a lunch box, you know how much food goes in the box. (Obviously it has a Japanese focus, but could be adapted easily for other tastes.) I don't really follow the bento method (for one thing, I have a fridge and microwave at work so I don't have to make sure that all my food can be eaten at room temp) but I do find a lot of the ideas useful.

http://justbento.com/

12 years ago

RoseandJoan

Veteran

Gaylene beat me to it Anne

There was a study published quite recently in which the scientist to prove a point lived off junk food but did not increase his daily calorie intake and over time his weight remained stable. (I'm unable to find the link). His point was not to eat junk food but rather in his opinion calories consumed determined weight.

I therefore second the option of using a smaller plate, especially when it's a takeaway night.

Also you could try researching the calorie content of takeaway food, for example beef in blackbean sauce with white rice had fewer calories than many other options on a Cantonese menu.

Once things have settled in the other areas of your life you could then try to implement a long term plan.

12 years ago

lyn*

(website)

Veteran

I think it's important to detach emotions from food. It's easier said than done, and I like to treat myself when my day is rough - but I reframe it: "I want this cake because I want to eat it. vs. I deserve this cake because I feel like crud."

12 years ago

froggiebecky

Veteran

A quick suggestion for the iron: spinach or green beans (if you like them), and steak. Both are good food-based sources if you're not low enough to justify supplements or a trip to the doc (or just need an extra pick-me-up)

12 years ago

DonnaF

Veteran

Anne;
You have a lot of new stress and changes in your life. And maybe a good five pounds or more of you weight gain is carb bloat and not really fat? If I were you, I'd take a bit more time to adjust and to figure out constructive ways to address the stress. Maybe walks, yoga, or meditation or whatever you think might work for you. Perhaps once you are more transitioned, you will feel emotionally prepared to do all the stuff you said you know how to do to shed those pounds. Right now, they are in a sense providing you with protection.

BTW, I'm no psychologist. I just know from personal experience that losing weight can be *one more thing* and that moving from the intellectual desire to the emotional desire to do so is so much easier said than done.

12 years ago

TraceyLiz65

(website)

Veteran

I think DonnaF make a great point. it's hard to do it with new stressors and without replacing it with other coping mechanisms for the stress. Being aware and talking about it is the first steo. Getting the motivation to begin is a lot harder... Sometimes timing is everything...

12 years ago

anne

Veteran

Such a lot of thoughtful replies here!! Thanks so much

Mo - so I am not alone as one who isn't that keen on fruit and veggies. All the rest of my family love them. I remember my Dad asking in mock tragedy "how did we raise a daughter who doesn't like fruit!)
I took your advice about logging food intake and signed up for myfitnesspall, which lots of YLF people had recommended and I tried to do a few months ago and was thwarted by a technical issue I got around today. DH and I have recently started recording our spending on a phone app. It is the first time this century we have done that, and it is because it is on our phones. So I have high hopes of the food tracking

Elpgirl- you made some perceptive and empathetic comments. I can and should and will tonight sit down with DH about the food. He is doing the weekly shop tomorrow and I'll encourage him to do a meal plan. I'll have to think a bit more about snacks.
I think my sunshine intake is fine - I work quite close to a full length window - but I do struggle with the sleep. I get up at 6am/6:15 but am rarely in bed before 11pm. That isn't quite enough for me, and I get very sleepy at times. And sometimes I have been all out exhausted by the weekend. I think that if I do have an iron deficiency that may contribute to the tiredness too. I am about to go to a seminar my employer is putting on about sleep, so perhaps I'll pick up some tips!

Gaylene, I am really glad to hear from you. I do don't really want to avoid food that we enjoy eating. I already do your first 2 suggestions (have eaten off a bread and butter plate for years and have always drunk copious amounts of water) but I think I may have been slipping on suggestion 3 ( I used to be a slow eater, but suspect I am not now) And Number 4 is not something I have tried and sounds promising!! I'll give it a go

Diana - yes I already usually bring in my lunch. There are a great many tasty food options close to where I work (in theory I allow myself to buy lunch once a week but I rarely do, exept about once a month if DH comes in to have a lunch date with me) but to save money I don't go there. I usually have leftovers or bring in something like vegies and a tin of flavoured tuna, or have a tub of cottage cheese in the fridge and eat it with dill ( I keep a jar in my desk) and the crackers they provide. I don't think I do to badly with lunch - it is the inbetween snacking that isn't so good!
I don't think I'll take soup for lunch (too much potential to spill) but I liked your thoughts to have it in the evening meal. I was doing this awhile ago and really like it.
Will look further at the Bento link!

Julie - I found a few links to people who ate fast food and lost weight!! You are right that there are differences between menu options

Lyn - I like where you are going with that!

froggiebecky - I don't know my iron level yet, but I am trying to eat more beef (not very keen on spinach or green beans!)

Donna - your last sentence is exactly right!!!

And I think you might have been right about the carb bloat.

Because I woke up this morning 1.5 kg (3.3lb) less than I did yesterday (even though yesterday included 2 choccie biccies, a date slice, several crackers and the aforementioned thai takeaway) I am now only a pound above what I consider the top of my normal range. I can only attibute it to getting rid of some bloating and perhaps to not eating after my evening meal and having fried tomatoes and egg for breakfast instead of porridge (so I did it again this morning, though I am missing my porridge!).

But my first thought was that all you lovely people had magicked it away during the night!

12 years ago

Lyn D.

Veteran

I am sorry that you are going through this during a stressful time Anne.
I would suggest increasing you exercise by walking during your lunch break and taking the stairs at work if there are any etc.
I find that the more I focus on food the more I want to eat!

12 years ago

anne

Veteran

Thanks Lyn. I know the dynamic of which you speak!!

I do exercise, usually 3 lunchtimes a week. My workplace has a gym, so I usually do 2 treadmill sessions and one weights or circuit class.

I just got the letter from the Red Cross, BTW and I do probably have an iron deficiency though I'll have to go to my doctor ( I haven't found a doctor yet!) and get tested again. I don't know how bad it is. Does haemoglobin 104 and ferritin 2.67 mean anything to any of you? I am sure my sister who was actually anemic, was a lot worse.

12 years ago

cinnamon fern

Veteran

Hemoglobin 104 is mild anemia - worth getting checked out.

12 years ago

Mo

(website)

Veteran

Sounds like you're tackling this head on! Good luck with your efforts. I'm happy to think that your 3 lbs got 'magicked' away

12 years ago

Lantana

Veteran

Anne I empathise with the baking urge. I confine my efforts to times like now when I have guests to share with, otherwise I have no self control. (Apple tart Tatin last night, lemon tarts tonight, tut tut.)
It's a deeply comforting activity and I wish I could suggest a zero calorie alternative.
I hope you find a way before too long to get your "inner coach" fired up to get your eating under control.

12 years ago

ironkurtin

Veteran

I'm of the tough-love school of body and weight maintenance. Ready?

You need to think about portion control and the content of your food. Brown rice and fruit may not be the answer. I suggest you think about lean protein and make it the center of every meal. That may mean a lot of sauce and a little bit of pasta. But always think, where is my protein? If there's no protein, even in a snack, don't eat it! And beware sugar pretending to be protein - most smoothies and energy bars are just junk, but they like to act like they're not.

You need to think of eating well as being a job. Your food may not be what you (currently) consider delicious, but you must be strict to see gains. Your taste buds will change as your diet adjusts. So will your blood sugar. Soon it will take less to make you feel full and satisfied.

You need to stop weighing yourself after every meal. It sets up a really bad dynamic and blame-eat-feel-bad dynamic in my experience. And it sets up a pattern of justifying ("oh it was the salty eggs") when that just may not be the case.

You need to not just exercise, you need to exercise correctly. I suggest a consultation with someone who can set you up with a regime and routine - something you can commit and stick to. Fitness in general will get you to a body shape (weight is really irrelevant) that you want, and will make aging less horrible.

You need to not just bake, you need to bake healthy things. It sounds like you are taking refuge in sweets, but there are other things to bake. Try looking at and modifying paleo recipes, which use a lot of coconut, tapioca, and almond flours. I also enjoy baking things for other people to eat.

Most of all, you need to recognize THAT YOU DESERVE TO BE HAPPY. If that means taking time from the kids, or your husband, or whatever to exercise, and it means you need a separate meal from them, and it means a little bit of hassle from other people, THAT IS OK. Don't let other people be your excuse. Because they are not the ones living in your body, are they?

Also yes, drink lots and lots and lots of water.

12 years ago

Diana

Veteran

Oh, I just thought of something re: baking and why I don't do it as much as I think I might otherwise. I keep my butter in the freezer. Mostly I do this for reasons of keeping it fresh but it has the added side benefit of meaning there is not butter readily available to bake with when I get the urge. Then if I really want to make something I have to take the butter out and wait for it to thaw, during which time I can come to my senses! I do have some butter in the fridge to use on toast or if I need a small pat for a sauce or something, but it's generally not a full stick. (Which again means if I bake something immediately it can only use the limited amount of readily available butter).

12 years ago

anne

Veteran

Dana, I have been absorbing your "tough love" for a while, so took a while to reply. I know you have had a great body transformaton recently
Your insight about protein was interesting, particularly in respect of snacks (I do try to have protein in my main meals). So maybe if I do succumb to crackers at work I should have some cottage cheese with them? Do you have any recommendations for how much protein per meal/day.

I only weigh most mornings, not after each meal

I'l have a look at some paleo baking recipes

I have had programmes done by PT's at the gym...not sure if that is what you mean.

Diana - good idea - bit like freezing your credit Card

And it looks like I am down nearly 3 kg (6 pounds) from Monday morning. The weekend will be harder though

12 years ago

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