How I decide to keep or return

The other day, I bought an item and wasn't sure whether I should keep or return it. I remembered that I had culled some questions from YLF that I could ask myself to help me decide in these types of situations, and the answers to the questions really showed me that I needed to return the item (which I did today). I thought I would post the questions in case they help anyone.

Does this item make me feel as happy as items I currently own?
Can I close my eyes and picture myself wearing this in my life?
Do I want to wear it right away?
If I try this on with other wardrobe items, do I want to reach for THIS item, or would I prefer to wear something I already own?
Am I getting this just because it's on sale?
Would I be willing to let go of an equivalent item that I already own?
Do I have to fuss with it to get it to look good?
There are only so many items that I can wear during the year. If I wear this, something else won't get worn. Is that OK?
If I don't keep this, will I miss it?
Would I rather put this money toward a different item?
Does this item further my style, or is it more of the same stuff I have in my wardrobe?

9 years ago

anne

Veteran

Great set of questions Gigi!

rachylou

Yes, those are good!

Joyce B

Well done! Those questions are very useful. My favorite are if I return it will I miss it and does the item further your style or is it more of the same.
Your post is great!

Summer

What a sensible and comprehensive list, Gigi. I doubt if I could remember all those points, but I do use some of them. One that I am definitely going to borrow from you is the last: "Does this item further my style, or is it more of the same stuff I have in my wardrobe". That is going straight on my list.

unfrumped

Really good list for me to review right now while editing, because it's easy to add stuff for the wrong reasons.

Penny

Love these questions! Sometimes if I'm trying on something at home, I have to ask: have I not taken it off yet because I'm still trying to decide about it, or have I not taken it off yet because I love it so much that I want to keep it on? If it's the former, probably need to send it back . . .

Alassë

Yes, excellent questions. Thanks for listing them to share.

Windchime

I remember the discussion which generated these questions, Gigi. You have a great list here. Now that my wardrobe is about the size it needs to be, I can ask myself if a new item is worth getting rid of an older one. I find I'm adding at a slower pace these days.

Anonymous

Very sensible. Thanks for sharing!

I need to copy this list to Notes on my phone to have handy when shopping. Thank you for putting this list together. I still also ask myself what pieces I have that I would wear with the item to make outfits, especially if it is a separate.

Sara L.

Great set of questions! I need to bookmark this for future use.

rabbit

Great questions!

Also to Penny's question:

have I not taken it off yet because I'm still trying to decide about it, or have I not taken it off yet because I love it so much that I want to keep it on?

It takes me a long time to decide about things that are pricer, even if I love them - if I can return them to the store they go home with me and get tried on exhaustively, with everything I'm thinking of pairing them with. With shoes I try them with different socks, different insoles, and different times of day. Sometimes it takes until the third try on that I notice something uncomfortable about a shoe. I also keep scanning for the same kind of item online for a week or so to double-check that it is the best option at the best price.

Confession - with my leather jacket, I wore it out and about with the inside tags on at least 10 times before I took them off. I was planning to keep it, but I couldn't make myself cut the tags, until my DH was finally like, stop being ridiculous, it's great, keep it.

Barbara Diane

I use several of those. Because several of them are habits now, I am working on thinking about whether I would rather save for something better/more expensive. This has helped me to occasionally buy some "upgraded" items.

Gigi

I'm glad you're finding the list helpful! Most of them I have in my head, but during my most recent K/R session, I was having such a hard time that I thought I should go check the list. Many of the questions I had forgotten, and those turned out to really shed light on my situation.

Rabbit, I try things on multiple times too. I liked your story about the leather jacket. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who can be like that!

Barbara Diane, saving for more expensive items is something that kind of came later in the game for me, after I had gotten a basic wardrobe together. At first, there's such a focus on putting together core elements of a style that a person can't even really consider what to save money for. The same goes for the last question, about whether the item really adds something new to my wardrobe. That question works best after you have a basic wardrobe put together.

Joy, you are so right about it being important to have items to wear with the new item. I'm reminded of unfrumped's post recently where she talked about trying an item on with jeans to see how it looks, as kind of a way to assess the bare bones of a garment's appearance. If all I can pair with an item is jeans, is the item so amazing that I want to keep it anyway, or does it need to go back because I can't pair it with anything else?

Penny, that's an interesting take on why the garment hasn't been taken off yet. Generally, you're right, that if I haven't taken it off yet because I'm still trying to decide, it's probably going to end up going back. But I find that when I am trying on a new style of clothes (for instance, recently I started adding some seventies-type clothes to my closet), I am not acclimated enough to the new style to make a quick decision. I've bought a handful of items in this new style, and each time, it took me a while to decide. But I'm wearing the "keeps" a lot, so I think I made the right decisions.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Great questions, Gigi. In the same breath though, I'd like to caution you because you won't know the accurate answers to some of these questions right away - like the very first question. You have to put an item through its stylish paces to assess your true happiness factor.

And also, buying something you can only wear a little later because of the weather is a not a reason to pass on the item now.

This is the BEST question to ponder:

Am I getting this just because it's on sale?

On the whole, these are good things to think about. Nice to see you share them with us.

LaPed

Oh, rabbit, I've done just what you did with your leather jacket with several coats and toppers! Coats/jackets are one of the few items I'll pay an "investment" price for, and once I have them in my hands I almost always have a cold-feet period where I'm just not sure if I should keep or return.

Style Fan

Great questions. Thanks for sharing.

Thanks for the caveats, Angie. When I use these questions, I always use them as a group, so I don't let just a single question dictate my action. But if almost all of the questions are answered in a way that indicates that I am not all that happy with the item, then it helps me make a decision if I'm on the fence. I don't have a lot of extra wardrobe space, so I need to be brutal sometimes!

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