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How do you plan a wardrobe for fluctuating weight?

trekkiegirl

Veteran

My weight has been fluctuating fairly dramatically over the last few years. At my thinnest, I was about 115, flat chested, but still had thicker thighs and a decent butt. That was about 4 years ago. Now I'm 135, much bigger breasts (almost C cup), and obviously bigger thighs and butt lol. My shape has generally stayed the same, a pear with now slightly more hourglass tendencies. In the last year or two, I've mostly fluctuated in the 125-135 range. Tops aren't as much of an issue, neither are dresses, but things like pants and skirts are harder to work around, and it's frustrating to try something on that fits one day, and then try to wear it again a few months later only to find the fit is significantly off.

I'm fine with my shape overall, I rather like it, but my goal is to be more fit (I'm what people call "skinny fat" in that while I'm not overweight by medical standards, my bmi is higher than it should be, and I can barely walk up a flight of stairs without getting winded). My goal, especially once my endometriosis and rheumatoid arthritis is better controlled, is to be much more toned and slightly muscular. With that goal in mind, I have no idea where my measurements will end up. I know that naturally, I'll still have bigger thighs and butt and a decently defined waist, but will I go back down to the size I was 5 years ago? Or will I stay approximately the same size I am now, just leaner? It's a bit frustrating, because I don't want to stop buying clothing entirely, but I'd hate to invest in things that won't work in a year or so.

So I ask you, knowledgeable Fabbers: How do you shop for an evolving, changing body? Are there particular pieces that would fit within my style (ladylike vintage with a dash of punk and sometimes mod) that will fit regardless of whether I'm a 4 with 32-25-35, or a size 6-8 measuring 36-28-40?

Seems impossible

Dressing

26 replies

Latest reply was from KikiG

Anonymous

My weight has not fluctuated that much, so I'm no help there. However, I wonder if the meds you take for RA affect your weight. If I were you, I'd ask your doctor. I assume you have seen a rheumatologist. That's who I would ask. I know very little about RA, but I do know that the way it's treated is different than the way OA is treated.

I have OA and take strong pain meds for severe back and leg pain. Thankfully I don't have to take any meds that fall into the narcotic category, but I do have a muscle relaxant to take at night whenever the pain is really bad. I can't sit for very long at a time, and must stay active to keep the pain at bay. I think the activity helps me keep my weight stable.

You may have to keep several different sizes of clothing on hand. Maybe someone else can be of more help, but I'm thinking that if your weight fluctuates as much as you say, you're just going to have to accommodate the fluctuations. Unless, of course, your doctor can help you figure it all out.

Anonymous

I don't have an answer to this. It is frustrating, frustrating, frustrating. At one time in my life, I had duplicate garments in three sizes. THREE SIZES. Still shudders that memory.

That was a few years ago. Now I have pieces in my working wardrobe, such as skirts, that are forgiving. When I feel a weight gain or water weight increase, I reach for the skirts. When my weight goes back down, I reach for my pants. Not an ideal system, but it seems to get me out the door.

It only takes a weight fluctuation of 5 pounds to make me reach for the skirts.

Anonymous

We've had this discussion several times here on the forum, and it always brings out a lot of commiseration and fellow weight-fluctuaters. I'm one of them. It is indeed difficult to keep a long-term collection of quality clothing in several sizes - as you say, especially in pants and skirts. I have a fairly small frame myself, and even 5 lbs means a pair of jeans or a skirt no longer is wearable.

I don't have a magic solution, but many recommend having a good base of knitwear and fluid fit pieces that can be flexible and accommodating to a changing body. Wise words.

Working out will definitely change your body - not necessary in how much you weigh, but in how you fit into your clothes. If you are planning major lifestyle changes like this, all I can say is don't invest in a ton of clothing until you get a handle on how you will wear and fit into clothing.

And - good luck and congratulations on making a commitment to a lifestyle/fitness plan. Worth every bit (I say from being a fitness fanatic )

froggiebecky

Veteran

I gain and loose fairly frequently--sometimes stretching a size or 2. I find that knowing *where* I gain weight helps--for you that's hips and thighs, for me it's more arms, midsection, and butt.

Lots of ladies here fluctuate through sizes, and some keep 'heavier' and 'lighter' wardrobes, and switch as needed, especially if the fluctuation is regular, and attributable to things like hormones or the seasons. I don't have the money or space to make that work for me, so I simply buy things on the lower end of the price range (e.g. from Target, H&M, etc). That way, so I don't have many hurt feelings if I grow or shrink out of something. My fluctuations are also mostly due to exercise, eating habits, and stress, so there's not much sense in keeping multiples in different sizes.

A third option is to make friends with a tailor. Buy a skirt that suits your heavier weight, and tailor down as needed. Make sure the tailor does not cut away the excess fabric, and you should be set to go.

Bottom line, dress for the body you have now. Take the body changes that will come with the addition of a workout plan as they come, when they come.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Yay for positive fitness change!!

I had been a skinny fat non exerciser for most of my life. Then, in my 40s I had a lot of stress and gained more fat. A lot more. Formerly sort of "pearish" (what you describe), I became slightly lusher/ more hour-glass like. But also very uncomfortable with my health and body.

So I joined a coaching program. Like you, I was happy with my overall shape and didn't really expect or want to lose a whole lot -- but I did lose a lot. I guess I had not really understood how much fat I truly had to lose! I ended up going down 35 pounds. And gaining muscle. And my body shape is somewhat different than before.

During my weight loss, I didn't really buy clothes. I wasn't "into" fashion (mainly out of lack of money combined with the sense that I didn't "deserve" it). I would not recommend that path to anyone.

What I would recommend is building a small capsule wardrobe around forgiving knits for the time you are losing weight. A knit skirt (with elastic waist -- you can cover it with a belt) can be a big friend to you. Ponte pants will probably work better than jeans. FLUID tops will work throughout, pretty much -- although you may wear a different size when you reach your goal. I would seriously take a look at one of Angie's small capsules and build your version, but around knit fabrications and with a strict budget in mind, knowing you will not keep those clothes. Buy some fun accessories to make it feel like you and to switch things up.

Halfway through my weightloss, I bought a new pair of jeans. Eventually those ones were too big for me, too. But they did the job. In your case, BF jeans might be a good bet. Buy them on the "slim" side now and they will get looser but still acceptable as you go down.

And good luck!

trekkiegirl

Veteran

Hmm definitely some good advice here. I'm not on any meds for the RA yet, my appointment next month will actually be the first time I've seen a rheumatologist since I was a child. I do take a very mild narcotic daily, and a muscle relaxer once or twice a month.

I guess I'll have to do some searching on here, if I can get that function to work on my phone

jackiec

Veteran

Lots of good advice given already. I like how you say you are happy with your body because that's most important. Like lisap says, I wouldn't invest lots of money in your wardrobe if you know it will be in flux. However, Angie always says to dress the body you're in, right?! As a side note, my sister's weight naturally dropped as a side effect of her RA meds when she started them 2 years ago. She's naturally athletic anyways, but meds affect everyone differently (as you know). Best of luck

Thistle

Veteran

I just had my second baby, so yeah, I hear ya!

Lotta great advice already. All I can say is I have been dressing for the body I have right this minute. And not purging just because something doesn't fit at the moment

Aziraphale

Veteran

Aaargh. I totally sympathize. My weight doesn't fluctuate ordinarily, but, like many other women, my body morphed into something unrecognizable during both pregnancies, and then back down again. I hated it.

My best advice is to avoid buying really expensive tailored items that will not fit (or will need major alterations) if you lose weight. It's handy that slouchy and draped style tops are everywhere at the moment. Those will fit even if you gain or lose 20 lbs.

Also, be ready to pay for new jeans, or pay to get the waistband taken in.

Also, I agree with Thistle that you might go easy on the purging, at least until your weight has been stable for a whole year (or preferably two). Sometimes people lose a whole bunch of weight, and then over the next year, even if they don't gain it back, it seems to redistribute itself somewhat -- so your measurements can shift.

unfrumped

Veteran

That can be really tough! And you've gotten good advice already.

I have not flucutated a lot but with a small frame, I still have the problem that if something fits precisely (bottoms, yeah!) it may not be flattering or comfortable with even 5# gain. And also, I'm at a point where I may be changing lifestyles or need to think ahead to that--maybe things like downsizing and career changes and even grandchildren (in the future!)--which might require a shift in wardrobe as well.

I think some of the best advice relates to not going overboard on, well, advice!
Meaning, find the middle ground that works for your life, weight changes and budget.
You can hear all sorts of dramatic statements. But, it may not be feasible to "don't keep anything that doesn't fit you right now!" Huh? Instead, don't keep something that is intended to shame you into losing weight or that makes you feel bad to look at it--that's a different thing. And maybe also it's not fair to say that if someone keeps a few pair of pants one size up, that it'll make you lapse and gain weight. It does make sense to look for some of those HEWI items that are very forgiving of different weight and look good, but different, one size up or down. So yes, some people get great satisfaction from "purging" dramatically every time there is a weight change, but I think it's okay to have some off-site items.

The other thing is, it can make sense for many reasons to run a "leaner" (no pun intended) wardrobe of best items and not try to have lots and lots of similar things all the time. That allows for more fashion changes as well as weight changes. It is then more likely that you'll either have worn something out, or be ready to try a new style regardless of size, and have budgeted the $$ for same. So then, you're not "not buying" because you're worried about weight, you're "keeping your options open" for fun new things as they come along. Prudent restraint, not deprivation.
I like to think of the saying, you can maybe have a lot, but you can't have it all.
I'm trying to do more of that-- I will be able to keep add things on a regular basis that will truly be the best item for shape, size, fashion and lifestyle right now, as long as I don't try to have 100 "right now" items.

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

Ug, yeah, I am living this right now and it's non fun. Unless one adopts a flowing, Eileen fisher kind of vibe, which doesn't appear to be your style, I think it's avoidable to have bottoms in a couple different sizes, whenever weight fluctuations get more than 5-10 pounds.

I couldn't agree more with unfrumped that the usual advice about 'get rid of everything that doesn't fit right now' is actively unhelpful if this is your situation, especially if it's due to a long term medical condition that's unlikely to vanish. But having all the stuff out in your wardrobe just to stress you out when you get dressed is annoying too. When I was actively losing a lot of weight, I went through my drawers and closet every couple weeks, tried everything on, and pulled out the stuff that had gotten too big to be reasonable. I had a Rubbermaid bin of smaller things and tried those on and pulled them into my active wardrobe when they started fitting. Now that I've gained weight back for the moment, partially because of medical issues, I'm doing the same thing. Everything that is too small right now goes in one section of the closet so I don't consider it when I'm getting dressed. I'm not getting rid of it, as I'm sure ill wear it again. Same with the stuff that had gotten too big - I kept the best of it and didn't donate it. Everyone approaches this differently, but I never found 'but I don't have anything to wear' a significant motivator to not gain weight.

I've thought of somehow color coding my closet, actually, because it doesn't always come down to what fits and what doesn't, it's more about how the fit is at the moment. Most of my tops and sweaters are wearable within a pretty big range of weight but they look different on the body and require different other parts of the outfit.

gradfashionista

(website)

Veteran

Congrats on embracing a fit lifestyle!

This is the question that has driven me mad all year, because a 10lb gain for me can mean going up three sizes in my hips. There are a few different tactics you could take: hold off buying clothes until you're at a realistic ideal comfort weight; buy fitted clothes now that can be taken it; or buy clothes that allow fluctuations. If your weight fluctuates, you probably have a sense of where you gain/lose more easily, and I would try and work with that. Cashmere and merino wool are forgiving fabrics, as is silk jersey. A-lines can accommodate fluctuations without problems, while straight cuts tend to be less forgiving. I would avoid fitted clothes that constrictive fabrics during this change, because these fabrics can't easily accommodate changing proportions, and it can be demoralizing to see a garment that once fit not fit in the way that it should.

trekkiegirl

Veteran

So much positive support and, yes also the commiseration, is really encouraging! Even though I know it's not the case, sometimes I feel as if I'm the only one dealing with this, since none of my friends really talk about it.

I do like some of the slouchy and draped style tops that are prevalent, but I definitely don't want to have just those things.

I also have a small bin in the basement with smaller clothes, but in my closet upstairs I have a few things that are slightly too big right now and I'm not sure what to do with those. I have thought about color coding too, so if you do that be sure to post your tips!

One thing I have going for me is, since I have a sewing machine and am just barely competent enough to use it, I'd never have to pay to get a waistband taken in or any other simple fix like that.

Datura

My size has been changing a lot lately too. I've had two babies in the last 5 years and I feel like I've been forever in flux. I really enjoy thrifting and with two little ones, getting a few hours out every week or two to comb the thrift stores has become a major treat.

My solution to shifting size has been rotating pretty much everything in my closet every season. I decide on a theme and a rough color scheme for the upcoming 3 months or so, pull everything out of the closet and only put back in what fits my size well and fits the new theme. I comb through what's left out, and store a few things that are awesome but don't quite fit anymore, or awesome but don't fit the theme. Everything else gets bagged up and re-donated (tax write-off, yay!). Then I thrift some more to fill up my mostly bare closet. It keeps me from getting bored and I'm slowly building up and keeping high quality treasures for future seasons, while letting the fun experimental stuff go in and out. With your interest in vintage, punk, mod looks, recycling a wardrobe through local thrift and consignment stores as your size changes could be a good low-cost way to go. Takes up some time, but I see it as a creative hobby in a way...

I also agree with Laura, "get rid of everything that doesn't fit right now" doesn't mean you have to get them out of the house, just out of the main closet. When I moved the near misses (especially jeans and pants that were just getting a touch uncomfortable) from my main closet into Tupperwares under my bed, it suddenly got a lot easier to get dressed and a lot less stressful.

Also, I invest in shoes, which I figure will fit wherever my body size ends up settling

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

Datura, great thoughts. I just had to share that when I lost 30 pounds I found that at least half my shoes were suddenly too big and I had to get rid of them. :/

Datura

Oh no! That would seriously make me cry. Maybe I have a problem

tulle

Veteran

Having contended with frustrating weight fluctuations (in spite of regular exercise and a healthy diet) since hitting my late 40s, I can tell you that a relaxed attitude helps! I finally stopped berating myself and learned to keep a closet that would handle most contingencies: skirts and pants in a range of 3 sizes, at least one "skinny" dress and one more forgiving dress, and lots of knit tops and sweaters in my best colors. With these I feel prepared most of the time. I love it when the smaller sizes fit, of course--those clothes are the most fun--but I refuse to be uncomfortable, ever. One of the most useful discoveries for me has been the Gap's Sexy Boyfriend jeans. At my heaviest, they fit like good straight-legged jeans; at my thinnest, belted and rolled up at the hems, they are fashionably slouchy. I know you are a thrifter; I've found that a very reasonable way to fill in any size gaps in my wardrobe, too. As for organizing, I'm pretty informal: in general the too-small and too-big clothes get shoved to either end of the clothes rod, with the just-right things front and center. I think it's very important not to wait for perfection, but to dress the body you have, on any given day, in a way that makes you feel beautiful. Good luck!

Style Fan

Veteran

I struggled with RA until my early 40s. Then the RA went into remission. I am 59 now. I found the medication made me tired but my weight has always been stable. Menopause caused weight gain. But I don't think that is your issue.

I sympathize with you about the RA. I worked out all through the time I was struggling with inflamed joints, etc. The one thing I did that my doctor warned me against was high impact activity (running, some dance stuff, etc.). I am paying for it now. My feet are in pain. Silly me.

I found stretching helped with RA. Things like Yoga.

Not much help with the clothing but I wish you well with the RA.

rute

Veteran

I had this problem some years ago, pants were the biggest problem, I went for looser tops and kept two different sizes of pants (36 and 40).
I tried not to spend much on pants and jeans.
I went also for wrap dresses and looser dresses.
It was only when I managed to avoid this problem that I started to invest more on clothes.

Mona

Veteran

For years, I was the same weight and last year I gained some weight mainly around my tummy. So yeah! most of my pants are tight now but I am keeping them in a holding zone. Two pairs of BF jeans have been a life saver in summers. I now have 3 jeans and a pair of black slim pants in my new size. It is important to be comfortable in your clothes and tight bottoms are exactly the opposite.

trekkiegirl

Veteran

Style fan - thank you so much for the encouragement.

Rite - yes I definitely could use more wrap dresses. That is a piece that's easy for me to wear at different sizes!

I'm dealing with this exact issue right now. I have a navy midi skirt on that fit fine when I tried it on a couple months ago, but now, instead of sitting at my waist, is falling down at least an inch from where I want it to be. I tried to hike it up and keep it in place with a belt... We'll see

shiny

Veteran

You've already got great advice, so I'll just add more commiseration. My weight had been relatively stable for years and years, but this past year, since I switched to a new job, I've gained about 15 lbs. Menopause & other health issues may be playing a role too, but I think the job is the big culprit.

Halfway through the year, it wasn't so bad... with say 7 lbs *extra* I suddenly found it easier to find jeans and pants that fit. So I bought a whole bunch, and decided the weight gain was a good thing. Since I'm only 5'0, I can easily find myself sized out if my weight is too low. But the weight kept piling on, none of those new jeans fit, and now I just don't feel like myself, and I'm finding it once again difficult to find clothes that fit. I'm edging now into the next size up if this trend continues. That size just doesn't work with my height -- it may work horizontally, but the vertical proportions are all off. It makes shopping for clothes more of a time-consuming chore rather than a pleasurable pastime. And these days I don't have the time for that added stress.

Sterling, I'm jealous that skirts are your "go to" for fluctuating weight. Skirts are the FIRST item I have to jettison when my weight moves, even just a few lbs. Because I gain in my midsection. I've got quite the belly right now. I wouldn't be surprised if people who don't know me assumed I was pregnant.

Just last week, I decided enough was enough. I am back on a diet. I have set a goal to drop this weight by the summer, but realistically, I'm okay if it takes a year since it took a year to put it on. That said, I may only drop half of it, and settle back in at the slightly higher weight -- the weight at which jeans magically started fitting me. We shall see.

Regarding your fitness plan, if you will be weight training, just know that the scale may not budge at all, but you'll still drop sizes like mad. I can no longer weight train (due to my own health issues) but I used to be a total gym rat. When I was weight training, I weighed pretty much what I weigh right now, today. BUT, I was about 4 sizes smaller.

trekkiegirl

Veteran

Shiny, I feel you! The issue with most of my skirts is that they are pencil type, with a non-elastic waist and they get very uncomfortable if I'm bloated or otherwise bigger in the general tummy region. I have 2 (3?) stretchy-ish longer skirts, but I don't want to wear those to death either. Pants, same issue. And although I could wear leggings to work, I don't have enough long tunics and/or sweaters to have a reasonable amount of variety.

I've found the quickest easiest way for me to lose inches and bloat is low-carb/high-protein and good fats. I feel much better when I do that too. It's just difficult when 3x a week at work we have free stuff like bagels, sandwiches, and happy hours.

I do want to incorporate weight training, I like the effects it has on your body, but I have to be very very cautious. I have arthritic spurs on 2 cervical discs and any wrong moves could send my entire neck, back, and shoulders into spasms from a pinched/irritated nerve. So I'm waiting on that until I can have someone like a trainer show me how to do things correctly and safely.

Alassë

Veteran

Skirts with waistbands that hit lower than my natural waist work for me over a range of 15 lbs. - they'll sit low on the waist at the low weight, fit properly at normal weight, and just barely fit or mostly zip shut (need untucked tops/ toppers) at the high weight.

Some pencil skirts can work if they're wider than the natural waist and have some give (and not ultra tailored on the hips) - I've been able to wear 2 of mine through that same weight range. (That's my early pregnancy/post-partum strategy.)

If you find a pair of pants that need some belting to fit your waist and are somewhat loose in the legs, they will also fit 10 lbs. up (more form-fitting).

Dresses with a high waist, fit 'n' flare style, will also accommodate weight gain nicely. This style worked quite a while for me in early pregnancy. http://heartofhaute.com/dresse.....atrix.html

rachylou

Veteran

I went Rute's way. Also, for a while there my best pants were these size small maternity pants of all things from Walmart of all places. Elastic band, but not a gathered one. I'm pretty sure no pregnant woman could have ever fit in them. They looked a lot like these expensive navy pants I had...

KikiG

Veteran

I've lost 20 pounds, very gradually, in 5 years, and I'm short, so that is like a taller person losing more. At my height, 5 pounds can be a visible difference and a size change. Jackets bought at the very top of that range no longer fit--I was carrying weight in my upper back I didn't realize was there. Jackets bought in the middle still fit nicely, and have gone from barely buttoning to buttoning very nicely and looking cute buttoned, it is the bottoms that are the problem, so my suit skirts are now quite loose and the pants are really not wearable. AT's triacetate line is *supposed* to have consistent black fabric from year to year. I hope this is the case and I'm going to try to get smaller pants. If you do make an investment purchase or one like a suit for business, it might make sense to bracket your sizes and have more than one bottom in more than one size to make sure you are consistent and do not suffer an awkward wardrobe gap when your body size flexes.

The other way to handle this problem is to focus your resources on tops and shoes, and have limited options for bottoms. It makes my life simple to have work clothes that revolve around black and variations of black for my bottom half, and have the color and detail and personality expressed above the waist.