How do you deal with clothing from eras you don't like? - YouLookFab Forum

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Outfits Ensembles Trends Advice

How do you deal with clothing from eras you don't like?

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

This is as much a psychology question as a fashion question, I guess: there's a definite 90s revival happening in new trends right now. The other day I found myself browsing stores and feeling unhappy looking at the clothes. So many of the silhouettes just had a weird vibe to me, some sort of mental resonance with memories of the past. It's not that I had one particular traumatic experience that the clothes remind me of; it's just that I don't feel like revisiting the person I used to be then.

I know that there are plenty of YLF members who are older than me, so this must be something that y'all have had to face before. Or do you get used to it, desensitized so that the clothes don't have the same resonance?

I know that I don't have to participate in every trend and I don't; but this is a stronger negative emotion than I've had about trends I dislike before. And even seeing it in stores or on other people seems to bring up the same feelings.

Dressing

30 replies

Latest reply was from Sally

rabbit

Veteran

For me that's 70's fashion, flared jeans in particular, but also the boho Woodstock look. Hmm, I think I just get used to it through exposure, and make new memories and mental connections by acclimating myself to how it is styled now. Now I feel like I can appreciate it more at a distance, although I still don't want to partake myself, partly because, like you say, I'm not that person who might have worn those clothes (when I was a kid) any more.

I think it can go the other way as well, I'll remember something I wore in the past all of a sudden when a trend resurfaces, or a color that worked on me in college and I haven't worn since then, and I might be more willing to try it if it worked in the past.

rachylou

Veteran

Hmm. I don't know that retro has ever gone so mainstream before. A nod to the past is one thing...but I feel we're a little past retro in some ways and into large scale recycling... Other thoughts: I didn't like bell bottoms in the 70s, but I liked flares at the Millennium. Also, the 90s in particular are one big nothing to me. This is weird, because I did a lot of shopping then, but still...I get nothing. To me it's a lost decade. Nirvana, baby doll dresses in tiny prairie florals, upscale DMs, palazzo pants, the PC, the flip phone, Bill Clinton...It's the gigantist Whatever to me. Even my workchild, who's nostalgic for her grammar school years then, agrees there's something slightly... pathetic about being nostalgic for this stuff. It's like the Beau Brummel period of the 20th century. Monumental things happened, sure, but it was more of a timeout in terms of the zeitgeist. Which is interesting...waistlines were empire, yes?, in both periods.

Anyways, I like the Angry Romantic trend best this year...

Anonymous

I didn't care about the '90s, to be honest. Some things were ok, but it wasn't remarkably stylish, Seems like a big blur in my memory,

rachylou

Veteran

See?!! Lol!

Ginger

Veteran

I've kind of dealt with this some. Acclimatization helps, like rabbit mentions. But I also work on finding the differences between the current trend and the past trend. This takes focus and deliberate effort. But it's been a help. Somehow the analysis distances the trend from the past. And then when I see it, I notice those differences, and not just how much it looks like the past. I'm also enabled to appreciate things that I didn't particularly like before.

rabbit

Veteran

It is pretty recycle-y right now, but didn't the 70's have their let's all dress up like we are in a medieval tapestry trend? (I wouldn't mind that returning). Something always gets changed in translation, if only the fabrics becoming poly. The 90's felt pretty sober and grim and disillusioned I think (baby doll dresses with torn black stockings), and the clothing echoed that, so if dark earthy lipstick or heroin chic comes back, that's too much 90's revival for me.

Okay rachylou but what is this slander against the Regency? It didn't have the powdered wigs and hoop skirts that came before, or the Victorian corsets, boning and crazy sleeves afterwards, but it was beautiful, comfortable, and the hair was flattering (I just think of Holly Hunter's 'do in the Piano and shudder).

Janet

(website)

Veteran

I simply look past the things that don't resonate with me (which actually sometimes make me roll my eyes, when it comes to some 80s and 90s styles). Other things I can appreciate if they are mixed into a more modern look with more contemporary pieces.

I'm 50 years old now, so old enough that some things really do seem way too retro-young, but young enough that some things seem retro-nostalgic in a more positive way. I pay attention to what resonates with where I am now, and pass by the things that really never much appealed to me even back when they trended the first time around. That strategy usually seems to serve me well.

rachylou

Veteran

Mwahaha, rabbit! The Regency period was just a short quiet soporific lull...

Anonymous

I took a wander through F21 the other day - ostensibly looking for harem pants. The whole experience was like travelling through a costume museum. Nowhere are retro and past-era style nods more prevalent than at places like this. I suppose it's more subtle in stores targeting an older customer and being 50+ and I appreciate that. It's interesting to now be on the other side where I've worn it , done it, seen it, and know what I like. I just don't even look at the stuff that holds no appeal to me - and honestly.....with the exception of 60's and early 70's stuff, (I should have/could have been the original hippy, or if not that, Ali McGraw) it's pretty much any and all past eras. I'm very much a forward looker in that regard.

Anonymous

I tend to please myself. 50's fashions don't work for me, so I would avoid them if they came back. At least those that are made for an hourglass figure. I liked the 60's and 70's but not the 80's and 90'sso much. If I really needed clothes and did not care for the current styles, I'd probably hit the resale shops. There have been seasons when all the colors seem too cool for my complexion. Angie's posts have helped to see ways of wearing items I would not have tried before.

Sal

Veteran

I am not a huge 90s fan yet I started 1990 being 20 and ended obviously at 30, a time when I should have really been able to have fun. I feel like many of my looks were super frumpy in retrospect - and others just peculiar. I had no money being a student, then saving to travel, then travelling, then recovering from travelling, then buying our first home......

Trends I could do again...

Linen, I had a lovely cream linen midi skirt with tortoiseshell buttons down the front. I would totally wear this today.
Boat shoes - I don't mind these, I find them cute
Stripes - never went away in my mind
501 jeans - maybe, would have to try them on again
Bold suits, maybe this was a throwback to the 80s but I had a stunning green suit, and a black vest suit, they were lots of fun.

Trends that I can't do again....

Black clunky shoes with everything
Small florals, especially in dresses and skirts
Plaid shirts
Turtleneck body suits
Boxy tees (I have a lot of pics of me travelling wearing boxy tees all around the world.
Flares that are too short. I had no idea about PPL.

I am happy to see others wear these trends, but I am not drawn to them as I am to 60s and 70s glamour (which I never experienced), or 80s DIY (which I took full advantage of as a teenager).

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

Having the fortune to be completely fashion oblivious for most of my life revivals mostly only resonate through television associations or pictures. So 90s = Seinfeld = Elaine in flowery dress and stompy boots (liked) + Jerry dad jeans and big white sneakers (not attractive). I have always had a thing for Victorian lace up boots though.

chirico (Chiara)

(website)

Veteran

I love this conversation, as this question comes to my mind from time to time.
It is interesting to me that the fashion eras I prefer are the ones where I didn't actively "participate" in fashion: the 60s and the 70s. In the 60s I wasn't born yet, and in the 70s my mom would dress me - although I was in love with suede wedge booties - who remembers these? In both cases it is mainly a matter of flattery, as fashion from those eras suits my body well.
The 80s and 90s bring back bad fashion memories, even though I like the palazzo pants of the 90s and the sleek, all black, Gucci suits.
I try to look for the differences, and see if the updated trend can look good on me. Take the flares reiterations: high waisted in the 70s, very low waisted in the 00s, high waisted but with some variations now. In many cases a trend is much more wearable in its reiterations (big shoulders from the 80s come to mind, the reiteration was not that exaggerated in stores, buy was more exaggerated on the runaway, go figure...).
Sorry for the rambling, it's just a series of thoughts that this topic brings to me.

Anonymous

This is a great question. There are certain trends I will never embrace. I end up wearing what works for my body and waiting out the fashion cycle on the trends I don't like. This is not that easy because there are lots of times I can't find a single thing in the stores to suit me. But I am imaginative and sometimes I find "work arounds." I am sorry but I can't think of a specific example for you today (not enough coffee).

Anonymous

What Rabbit said about the seventies and flares! I adored my flares back in the day and was heartsick when drainpipes took their place. Now I just can't do flares--possibly because much of my flare success had to do with the now unwearable 3" platforms I was sporting back then. But I have also learned more about fashion options and eras since my teens and decided I just don't like the whole boho and bellbottom vibe in general.

Luckily there seems to be such a variety of styles on offer right now (especially in jeans and trousers) that I can find something for me.

LaPed

Veteran

The 90s have always just seemed like one big hangover from the 80s. Like, everything in the 80s was so BIG -- the hair, the shoulder pads, etc. And everyone got sick of trying so damn hard. The 90s to me: Murphy Brown, those plaid car-salesman-type blazers she wore. Sort of anti-fashion, really, the 90s. Anti-fashion as a liberatory statement. With the kids, it all seemed to be about looking as thrown-together as possible. The grunge element, sure, but really just a sense of trying to look like you didn't give a damn -- about how you looked, about how you were seen. As fashion eras go, I think the 90s had a strong meta-narrative that translated into a lot of diverse and largely forgettable looks. Hard for me to even conceive of what this purported "comeback" of 90s fashion even looks like.

Sara L.

Veteran

I was in my late teens and 20's in the 90's and can't remember what I wore except for 501 jeans, bodysuits, and flannel shirts. I can remember meeting my DH in college and he always wore jeans, No Fear t-shirts, and a flannel shirt wrapped around his waist (that he hardly ever actually wore). I was a broke college student with no money for clothes, so I don't remember paying any attention to fashion.

catgirl

Veteran

Interesting! I don't get this with styles but with certain colors. There is a shade of dusty mauve that makes me gag - it was the color to wear with burgundy my senior year of high school. One of my worst colors, yet I wore it (angora cowl neck!). It feels like peer pressure to me now. Sage also bothers me because it was so ubiquitous in the late 90s especially decor.

Carla

Veteran

The late 60's to early 80's were a fashion black hole spent in a boarding school uniform. The EXPERIENCE of boarding school was excellent, however. I will always have a sugar eye for Black Watch plaid!

Sveta

(website)

Veteran

I was completely fashion-illiterate up until I stumpled on YLF almost 6 years ago. In one way it helps now because my main criteria is "Do I like it or not" and not because it reminds me of something I wore / saw 10-20-30 years ago. Fashion is tremendously intuitive thing for me but so far I have not noticed my perception influenced by my past experiences but rather by my current feelings.
I have the same relationship with colors.Thera are colors and color combinations which speak to me and make me feel happy, sophicticated, etc. but I could never understand the pre-consieved and total ban of some color combinations like orange / black (Halloween), green/red (Christmas) etc. I guess I am weird in this way

Aziraphale

Veteran

For me it's 70s-inspired clothes -- I have to suppress a strong negative reflex. I'm not totally sure why. I was a small child in the 70s (far too young to have participated in fashion, or even really to have noticed it that much), and yet I struggle to think of 70s styles that I like. Huge lapels, visible chest hair, tube tops, enormous floaty boho dresses, high-waisted flares...so many of the iconic 70s styles just do not speak to me. I try to keep an open mind though.

rabbit

Veteran

Aziraphale - I'm the same and thinking about it I think for me it's mainly two things. One, we were pre-teens in the early 80's when all the mainstream 70's fashions and music became roundly socially rejected and mocked -- and that's when I was most self-conscious about trying and failing to fit in.

Second, the original summer of love fashions were about a revolutionary lifestyle. People were burning bras and women stopped shaving, people walked the walk -- demonstrations and getting arrested, leaving everything behind (and maybe not speaking to your parents for decades) to live on a commune or follow a guru or become a public defender. Now nu70's festival wear is only talking the talk. F21's mass produced fringe bags, bellbottoms and peasant blouses are worlds away from the inherent meaning of why my mom dressed like she did when she rode around the country on the back of motorcycle with a dude named Clover.

catgirl

Veteran

Rabbit, that is something I detest, when people appropriate the trappings without considering the context. I knew a group (borderline Gen-X/millenial) that wore hippie garb and loved tie-dye, hand drums and thinking they were all cool hip counterculture. But in reality they voted conservative and were pro-guns, pro-war, and unironically clueless about the heritage of the 70s slogans on their graphic tees. Don't wear your "Make Love Not War" tee to the shooting range, please.

Barbara Diane

Veteran

Laura, perhaps when you are triggered by something you see, you could take a deep breath or two, acknowledge the feeling, and remind yourself of who you are now. Smile/congratulate yourself on who you've become and/or on your growth/effort to get to who you are now, etc. This way instead of taking you aback, it could strengthen you.

rachylou

Veteran

**"Make Love Not War" tee to the shooting range, please.**

Una, that blows my mind...

Sal

Veteran

I also don't like appropriation of things that people do not truly represent. I completely understand people wanting to go to a costume party as a "hippy" or a "punk" and I enjoy that too (although going as a "Nazi" or a "Al Quaeda fighter" brings another level of complication which I won't get into.)

I struggle with the 90s for that reason. I was not particularly interested in Grunge Music, and I did care about a lot of things, including how I looked. Travelling around the world when you are 23/24 you come across a lot of pseudo types, and I quickly tired of that. To try and wear plaid and docs and a petticoat underneath felt inauthentic to me in a way that wearing shoulder pads, patterned tights and teased hair did not. Some if it was timing and location - I suspect if I had been in Seattle at college I would have felt very differently rather than travelling and then trying to break into the corporate world.

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

Interesting and helpful to read everyone's thoughts. Barbara Diane's comment is probably right on - I'm dealing with a lot of other negative stuff in my life right now, so this is bugging me more than it might be if I were feeling more satisfied with things.

I actually liked a lot of 90s fashion at the time. I was a tomboy and a nascent feminist, so having the grunge thing happen when I was in high school was great, because it was a style that wasn't based on traditional femininity and showing as much skin as possible; it was more practical and functional. But 90s fashion for people who are over 25 and have jobs - I don't remember it being very interesting.

I am not interested in revisiting any of the following:
Ditsy florals with black backgrounds
loose PJ-esque pants and pants with front pleats
woven tunics over loose pants
off the shoulder tops
slip dresses

I still wear combat boots and bootcut jeans (though higher-rise these days) on occasion. I'm finding some of the chunkier shoes appealing in a nostalgic way, but then I'd have the problem of making sure my outfit communicated that these are new shoes, and not 20 year old ones I've had in the back of my closet all this time.

Az & rabbit, I found an absolutely delightful 70s-era sewing handbook at the used bookstore not too long ago. It is total summer of love, learn to sew your own things and make skirts out of old jeans kind of stuff - no bras, make costumes for parties, wraps to carry your babies in, all that jazz. I should take some pictures and post them here. Definitely as much a lifestyle/way of living as it was just a fashion trend.

catgirl

Veteran

Just to add in the interests of honest disclosure, one reason I quit wearing most overly military gear was because of the authenticity issue and a sense of disrespect to the military. The forum was a part of that. I still enjoy military-esque looks, but try to keep them obviously fashion-related.

Gigi

Veteran

I can have this reaction too with clothing from certain eras. It is similar to what you are experiencing: kind of like revisiting who you were back then, which isn't always a good experience! I have been doing a lot of self-healing work and interestingly enough have found that I now am able to enjoy fashion from the 70s, which used to bring up very strong feelings of dislike bordering on anger. I didn't try to make myself like the clothing; I just felt drawn to it during a style shift. I was quite surprised when it happened. I attribute it to the psychological healing work that I have been doing. But I still have a very negative association with 80s clothing.

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