My son (and only child) is graduating high school this year and I couldn't be more proud. While this may seem like a fairly normal accomplishment for most, it is not for my son.
From the age of 12-14, he was bullied by a group of boys on a daily basis. It was a horrendous few years. There was not only the constant insults, exclusions, and gossip, there were many, many physical assaults as well. We had the school and police involved and unfortunately, not much was accomplished to rectify the situation.
It was finally resolved when the ring leader moved to another city and the bully group disbanded.
But the bullying took its toll on my son emotionally. Twice he spoke of killing himself, started self-harming and at one point, had a complete mental breakdown which required hospitalization. He felt worthless and unloved and became very angry with everyone. But the school counsellor was unbelievable and met with my son every single day. He would check in with the counsellor in the morning before going to class. This was to ensure first of all that he was there and secondly, that he felt strong enough and mentally prepared to work in the classroom. At that time, he had to sign a contract that for that day, he would not hurt himself. He then had to check in at the end of the day to let the counsellor know he was ok, that he'd gotten through the day, focused in class and could come home safely. It literally was one day at a time. This went on all of Grade 9 and 10. In Grade 11, they met once per week and things were better. This year, my son really turned the corner. His grades shot through the roof, he found his confidence again and started to believe in himself. He has a fantastic group of friends (one of whom has been there beside him every step of the way) and he and that same counsellor have a unique and special relationship.
So for him to graduate high school is a special achievement. And I could not be more proud of him.
Why am I sharing this? For any parent here who has gone through the bullying problem or has worried about their child's self esteem...there is light at the end of the tunnel. Don't be afraid to talk about it. Get the school involved. Get your child help as soon as you notice the behavior changing. And love him.
From the age of 12-14, he was bullied by a group of boys on a daily basis. It was a horrendous few years. There was not only the constant insults, exclusions, and gossip, there were many, many physical assaults as well. We had the school and police involved and unfortunately, not much was accomplished to rectify the situation.
It was finally resolved when the ring leader moved to another city and the bully group disbanded.
But the bullying took its toll on my son emotionally. Twice he spoke of killing himself, started self-harming and at one point, had a complete mental breakdown which required hospitalization. He felt worthless and unloved and became very angry with everyone. But the school counsellor was unbelievable and met with my son every single day. He would check in with the counsellor in the morning before going to class. This was to ensure first of all that he was there and secondly, that he felt strong enough and mentally prepared to work in the classroom. At that time, he had to sign a contract that for that day, he would not hurt himself. He then had to check in at the end of the day to let the counsellor know he was ok, that he'd gotten through the day, focused in class and could come home safely. It literally was one day at a time. This went on all of Grade 9 and 10. In Grade 11, they met once per week and things were better. This year, my son really turned the corner. His grades shot through the roof, he found his confidence again and started to believe in himself. He has a fantastic group of friends (one of whom has been there beside him every step of the way) and he and that same counsellor have a unique and special relationship.
So for him to graduate high school is a special achievement. And I could not be more proud of him.
Why am I sharing this? For any parent here who has gone through the bullying problem or has worried about their child's self esteem...there is light at the end of the tunnel. Don't be afraid to talk about it. Get the school involved. Get your child help as soon as you notice the behavior changing. And love him.
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