Sarbear, I have a thing about perfect hair myself, I love it on other people but when I leave the salon I run home, jump in the shower to wash out the product and rough up my hair a bit. It sounds as though your the same.
My husbands best friend is a stylist and he prefers to razor my hair to create more texture and a less even line. Is that something your stylist does?
With regards to the amount of blond, I would say that comes down to personal preference and how your feeling on the morning of your cut.
I'm currently in hair hell. My hair is just starting to grow back after falling out after having DD2. I'm too scared to have any colour until I'm confident my hair will survive the process. Don't expect to see anything other than a ponytail from me in the next few months so I will be extremely jealous when you unveil your new look.