February tracking, and what do you do about those items you try to wear and then don't? - YouLookFab Forum

Category

General

Welcome! Read about what to wear and how to wear it on the YLF Blog. Join the YLF Forum to ask specific questions or just chat about fashion and personal style. Or check out the curated list of things we love in YLF Finds.

Outfits Ensembles Trends Advice

February tracking, and what do you do about those items you try to wear and then don't?

Helena

Veteran

Hi all, just a quick post about my February plans, mostly to keep myself on track and of course to get your wisdom and insights too!

This month, I am going to keep track of the items I wear that I didn't already wear in January, to explore how much variety I need as we return to "normal" winter and whether my choices change at all.

As a 'grab-and-go' dresser most days, I also am interested in those items that I put on (because I obviously like something about them) and then immediately take off (because something clearly is not working). I'm curious what these items might have in common that I can learn from, or whether they are just not in the right season, or what.

Do you have those put-on/take-off items? Why do you think you reach for them but then don't ultimately wear them? How do you decide when to hang on to them and when to pass them along? How do avoid buying those pieces in the first place?

General

35 replies

Latest reply was from rachylou

Joy

Veteran

The items that you describe are ones I get rid of. If they are fussy so that I will be scratching, twisting, pulling, adjusting and in some way messing with them all day, I don't that piece and will look for something else.

Sara L.

Veteran

I have those items and it's usually because they don't look as good on me as I expected. Items that fit right and are the right color, but aren't as figure flattering as I expected. Or they just aren't quite my style. Maybe I thought I would branch out a little and be adventurous but the item doesn't feel authentic. Sometimes I can get over that by wearing the item and getting used to it. I'll usually try it on a day when I'm not stuck in the outfit all day. So not a work day - on the weekend I'll put it on to run a few errands.

Sisi

Veteran

I have written a long boring navel-gazing novel about this matter. I kept thinking of sharing it here on YLF then I had pity of you all and spared you.

In brief. I analyzed carefully each piece and my sensations about the piece, keeping in hand pen and paper (I think better when I handwrite) and wrote down all what I thought was not working: it can be colour, shape, fit, a detail, fabric, wrong fashion persona .... I generally hang on to these pieces for too long because I always hope I can make them work in some way ... of course it's an illusion.

How to avoid buying these pieces? This is the sore spot ... I have not found a solution yet! Curious to know what other Fabbers say.

Christina F.

Veteran

One thing I've done is to create collection called "Holding" in my Finds. I can go through my Finds to pick out stuff I need to try to wear to figure out if I still want to keep it. But I can also take the kind of item you describe and pop it into that collection so I can be sure to follow up and figure out if there is a problem with the item that stops me from wearing it.

You have to be pretty committed to having your wardrobe in Finds, of course.

Anonymous

Definitely! Hoping that the purchase limit will help me make better choices, along with buying things in capsules to avoid orphans.
Case in point, the rust topshop sweater. Great color on me, sufficiently refined, should go with everything, but problematic. The cropped length is better with skirts, but I wear more pants in winter. It could work with flowy pants, but I have none right now.

Katerina

Veteran

I have those items as well. Just some quick thoughts on the matter:

* When editing, I consider if an item still fits well, if I consider it sufficiently current and still within my style, if I like it - usually this is about quality, fabric, colour etc. However, what I do not do and should do is to consider how to wear the item - can I make a satisfactory outfit with the item? Or rather enough outfits to justify keeping the item. I think that if I would do that, many items I keep would go instead...
* That brings me to my major problem - I do not have enough completers/essentials to make the "put on/take off" items work. I must ask myself whether an item is worth investing in completing items or should it just go...
* Many of such items were purchased with sales goggles on.
* On-line shopping improved this for me - less wrong purchases. Enough time to try items on properly, make test outfits, consider, consult YLF, and also just change my mind. Shopping on final sale without the possibility to return items is the worse.

Cardiff girl

Veteran

If only l knew the answer to how to avoid buying things that you don’t end up wearing!My DD and I were discussing this only the other per day and agreeing that you can never tell with some clothing.Youbuy it because it fits and you like it but then you never end up wearing itWHY?Sometimes I think it’s weather related.I do know that some summers particularly I don’t wear stuff because it’s not been warm enough ditto cold versus mild winters.In general I hang in to stuff for quite a while before letting it go especially if I suspect it’s weather related non wear.Other times it’s probably all the reasons discussed on this forum,didn’t go with other stuff,not quite right for lifestyle etc..
I tend to put my non wear stuff in storage bags in my wardrobe but keep a visual record of them on style book so I don’t forget about them.Then if I haven’t worn them in so many years they go to charity.

Anonymous

I'm moving this spring/summer, and starting to tackle my entire wardrobe in terms of what I will keep and pack to move, and what needs to go. My test: if I put it on and want to immediately take it off? It's gone. I can't be emotional or waffly about this, as time is a factor, and it's also time to get a grip and make a collection of clothes I want to take into this next stage of my life. A chance to start fresh, if you will. I'm already envisioning a few tops , perfectly good but I'm no longer into, that are headed for the donate bag as soon as I finish typing this

nemosmom

Veteran

For those put on then take off items, I put them in a holding zone and make a point to revisit the holding zone at least once a season. For me it is definitely a seasonal as well as a sensory issue, especially in the winter. For example, I have snugger fitting pullovers that are my go-tos in the fall, but I feel claustrophobic in them once I need to layer them over bra+heattech and under coat+scarf. I crave cozy texture in the colder weather and sometimes an item feels too 'cold' to me on a cold day.

I struggle to keep a mental list of those pieces that are conditional - blazers that only work with skirts, sweaters that are too snug for heattech, sweaters without enough structure to wear with skirt, etc. So I try to group those things in a separate part of the closet. I have started using an app to help with this so it frees up my brain.

How to avoid buying those pieces in the first place is a HUGE challenge. Sometimes you just don't know how a piece will work until you've put it to the test. Of course, that's bad for the budget... Curious to hear what others do.

Bonnie

Veteran

I've been taking a OOTD photo to help me figure this out. I stick to tried and true combinations when I don't have time. For me, it's not so much that the item is unsatisfactory but that it's worn with the wrong pants, top, etc. If it is faded, uncomfortable, or unflattering, It has to leave my wardrobe.

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

lisa p, good luck with the move! Being able to get a handle on my wardrobe was a huge reason I stuck around here after initial posts getting ready for a wedding. People weren't into such advance moving prep, so I was sneaky & did a couple challenges "to see what I wear" that were very helpful. You have a much better handle on your wardrobe than I did. I hope you get good support with the choices you have to make.

On the original question here, I'm with everyone else trying to figure out what not to buy because I wouldn't wear it. I think a few commenters here just helped me dodge a bullet in the form of a couple tops that had "just one (or two) little thing(s) wrong". For me, comfort is key. I won't wear it if it's itchy or slimey-feeling or tight or asymmetrical (I subconsciously compensate & then am sore) or if the fabric doesn't "breath" or any of dozens of other things. It is rare that I discover these things after the fact. I usually note them while making the purchase, but think I'll be able to get past it. Wrong!

I keep track of latest possible return dates, and leave the tags on that long, even if I wear the item a little bit. They come off when it's time to wash it. Being ready for laundering is a sign that I'm wearing it.

Helena

Veteran

Great thoughts everyone! The two items on the list right now are a wide-vneck sweater in raspberry, and a light-wash pair of skinnies. It could be that there is a seasonal influence, so I will keep them around through the spring.

Bonnie, it's amazing what you can see in a photo that you can't see with your own eyes, isn't it?
Nemosmom, yes, it's all those details that make an item work or not, at a given time, under a given circumstance. I think it's impossible to get it 100% right, we'd have to never experiment! But close to 100 is the goal for sure.
Lisa, applause! Nothing like a move to kickstart some clearing out.
Cardiffgirl, quite right - you can't tell with some things until you try them!
Katerina, great list of factors to consider, thank you.
Suntiger, exactly ... it's those "this SHOULD work but it doesn't" items that are so frustrating.
Christina, that's a good idea.
Sisi great thoughts - for future reference, I love long navel-gazey posts
Sara, this: "maybe I thought I would branch out a little and be adventurous but the item doesn't feel authentic." So spot on for many of my bad buys.
Joy, yes - life is to short to spend it fiddling with fussy clothes imo!

Thanks as always, everyone

Mary Beth (formerly LBD)

(website)

Veteran

There are three reasons I keep reaching for a particular item and then take it off later:

1) I love the color - but the color doesn't flatter me.

2) The fit changes as I wear it - stretching out or bagging. (This is why I stopped buying clothes at Target, Zara, and H&M).

3) The fabric starts out only a little itchy or not comfortable, and increasingly becomes uncomfortable.

Or my body changes, like my upper arms and shoulders are more muscular, and now a beloved jacket or blouse is tight in the arms.

If I find myself putting on something, and taking it off within an hour of putting it on - and this happens more than twice, I assess. If it's the color, and I can redye it, then I do. If it's fit or comfort, then out the door it goes!

I don't have a definitive answer for avoiding purchases. I move around in the fitting room to assess comfort, and I take photos of myself with my iPhone, and review them, to assess the fit and color. I try to make sure I have a huge enthusiasm for the item at the time of purchase, and not a "maybe I can make this work" mindset. If I'm not excited when I try on the item, the excitement is not going to come later when it's hanging among my closet favorites.

And one can't always anticipate that that $48 J Crew tee is going to lose its shape within three washes.

Helena

Veteran

Great tips La Belle; thanks! So true about quality - sometimes you find out when it's too late!

gryffin

Veteran

TG - I'm sorry I have not read all the responses but I wanted to chime in because I just dealt with this. The reason I take something off is it's not a 10. Yes, for me everything can be a 10 including underwear, a simple ribbed tank because it's best in class and I love it. I just donated almost all of these items. Because "ok is not good enough" I think that's anushka rees. I used to waffle and put them in holding, then black in closet, in the donate bag but tugged them out. When I put them all in, wow, zen, calm, peace. It's a different mind set. I may pass on the last of the oks. They are completers. I use them but I don't feel a 10 in them...smacks head, getting a new donate back when I get home. Better less but higher happiness factor.. I don't know if that helps but that's my mindset now.

Helena

Veteran

Thanks Gryffin, yes, that's it isn't it - at the end of the day, regardless of the specific reason, the underlying reason is going to be, this doesn't feel great. I need to pay more attention to this when shopping!! And yes, I don't doubt there is continued head-smacking in my future, hopefully just less as time goes on haha!

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

Another reason just popped into my head, as I'm boxing up returns: As Angie posted today, part of how we dress is about presentation, how we come across to other people, and how we want to be seen. It is easy for me to step across the line between the parts of me I want to show/the light I want to be seen in and a role I want to play that isn't really quite who I am. Pieces bought for that latter reason don't work.

Helena

Veteran

Great point FI ... I need to consider that for these pieces

Janet

(website)

Veteran

POTO items for me can be due to a number of factors:

- fit is off but maybe because my weight is up, and I don’t want to give up the item because I’m probably at my peak size/weight
- item does not play well with the piece I’ve already decided to wear (I.e., a top is the wrong length for the rise and silhouette of jeans I’ve already chosen for the day)
- color or pattern is difficult to match or coordinate
- item is too dressy or casual for the activity planned or vibe I want
- item has a cling/hug or comfort issue
- item either doesn’t layer well or requires layers when I don’t want them

Not all of these mean the item needs to be jettisoned — it just means it’s not right for that particular day or mood. But if an item always seems to fall into that POTO category, I have to seriously consider letting it go.

Anonymous

Whats a poto? Is it like a pita?

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

Hmm, pita= Pain In the @$$, so where would Poto hurt?

I'm guessing poto is put on/take off.

Helena

Veteran

Lol, I love POTO as an acronmyn Janet! Suntiger, "put on take off"

Barbara Diane

Veteran

I have less and less purchases that fall into this category. Occasionally I find another piece later on that makes the unworn item into a wear a lot item.
Sometimes there is an alteration that makes the difference.

Taking time in my closet trying on outfit possibilities with the unworn item is time well spent.

I recently returned a kimono type long jacket because the perfect event to wear it to arrived and I picked something else to wear instead. I had been going back and forth about returning it, but that was the moment of certainty.

I have two unworn items with tags on. One can be returned and one can not. The first needs a VERY lightweight sweater/jacket to provide arm coverage. The color is proving quite challenging to work with. But I realized recently that a linen button up might work, so I ‘m still trying. I’m keeping at it because it looks dressy but is feather weight and a perfect dress for extreme heat. The second was expensive enough that I haven’t given up on it yet. Sales goggles were definitely involved in the purchase. I’m going to spend some time analyzing it to see if I can make it work, and it is classic enough that I’ll most likely hang on to it as sometimes a perfect item to make something work arrives later. Right now it is front and center in my closet to keep it in mind.

I have had items that I was unsure of at the time of purchase become absolute favorites, or items that get a lot of wears. I would be naked if my clothes had to be 10’s but my standards might be tougher than others.

The biggest mistakes are when I ignore that voice that knows that the red in that scarf is just a little too bright, even though the texture is so interesting, and nothing else in the store worked after I drive 45 minutes to this store. Real story.

Also, stopping to consider what will I wear this with and where will I wear it?And do I have something I like better that I would choose instead? If in person shopping I want to like the item at least as much as what I’m already wearing?

Anonymous

Aaah! I have been known to own pitas-mostly shoes

Runcarla

Veteran

Weekly, I pre-plan and make a mini capsule of mix-and-match items. I'll have a few outfit ideas in my head and dress from the capsule for the week. (It's a game I play with myself that is like living out of a suitcase. Not going into the closet for different items once I've made my capsule is my rule!) POTO's are rare, and usually because I've misjudged the weather or the activity. I'm a uniform dresser. I repeat outfits. I don't vary my silhouette much. I DO fall in love with some items and then forget to rotate through my closet, only to rediscover neglected items and re-love them later.

Jenni NZ

Veteran

Ha Suntiger, I feel PITA shoes are mainly PITFs- pain in the feet. Love POTO Janet- great acronym! I will think about this more and reply later.

LaPed

Veteran

I had a couple of these last year. Skirts/dresses that should have been trans-seasonal but turned out to be really clingy with tights underneath, so I avoided them unless it was warm enough for bare legs. Tried static spray, but that wasn't an all day solution. Now I'm trying out a silk slip, which seems to be a better approach. I'm hoping that the right underpinnings will make these more versatile garments. If not, I'll have to accept the fact that they are destined to be warm-weather only.

Sal

Veteran

I think we all have pieces like this. I usually wear them (the best way I can) and re-evaluate after a day's wear. It might be that they are now orphans, your preferences have changed, or that they are uncomfortable. I do wonder if it is a seasonal influence here - I think you might love them both in March/April.

I do the same thing - try my unworn (or almost unworn) clothes at the end of the season to make a decision. This summer these are occasion wear as it has been a really casual summer. So these will remain. I do have one tee that has been worn only once (it is a bit short and only works with jeans and it is too hot for jeans now).

Suz

(website)

Veteran

POTO. (Not to be confused with POTUS). Although...

Anyway, yes...I do have items like that.

My reasons:

1. Seasonal mis-match is a biggie. I'm with Nemosmom on that. I am at risk of jettisoning perfectly good items if I try them out of their "proper" season. Meanwhile, if we happen to have a milder (or colder) than average winter or hotter summer, some of my go-to items will suddenly seem all wrong. So I try to be mindful of that and simply put them in my seasonal hold zone for re-evaluation when the weather changes.

2. Sometimes I just never have the right occasion for an item. Theoretically, it should fit into my lifestyle, but either my lifestyle changes or ... well, who knows?

3. Fit/ comfort issues not noticeable on purchase. This happens sometimes to all of us. Either our bodies change or the issue just takes a while to make itself apparent. Such is life. These, I get rid of as quickly as I can -- no use crying over sunk costs.

4. I don't have the companion pieces to make the item work. If I love it, I hang onto it. Some years, I don't have the budget or can't find the support act but if I really like the item, I keep it and hope those supporting players will appear the next year. This has happened to me quite often with bottoms, in particular. Wide crops and high waists -- at first I couldn't find the pieces to go with them at retail but eventually those turned up. If you're an early adopter this is more likely to be a problem.

12