Excessively decorative, yuck - YouLookFab Forum

No picture of my outfit today (and now I'm in my pjs, yay) but it was this dress from Gwynnie bee:
http://closet.gwynniebee.com/p.....-with-belt
With nude heeled sandals, a blue and white bag, and a bue cardigan when needed. The problem with Gwynnie bee outfits is that there's no trial run, like your old favorites. I threw it on and went out to a busy day and quickly ascertained that the front slit was very high when I walked quickly or sat down, not to mention the side slits. In the afternoon I got my hair colored, and since the salon is at a mall I saw lots of folks, many of whom cast an odd glance at the shirttail high low hem.
It was weird. I was at a mall and I felt like I was too trendily dressed. Maybe it was the hem, maybe it was the heels, maybe it was my handbag... I tried to put my finger on it and finally realized that I felt 'excessively decorative', a phrase which makes me feel like Alaskagirl feels about 'pretty'. I don't mind looking cute or pretty, and I try to be well put together. But I hate feeling decorative - like if something happened my outfit is so impractical that I wouldn't be able to help. Somehow I felt that people were judging me to be merely decorative - not smart or thoughtful or kind, just fashion obsessed and shallow. All that from a shirt dress I don't even own, I know, but it does help me unpack why really out there looks - super high heels, practical silhouettes in fancy fabrics, etc. - get such visceral ugh reactions from me.

11 years ago

rabbit

Veteran

Interesting observation. I've felt this way when I wear something that isn't quite a comfortable style persona -- though it may be close. Like I'm a bit of a 'faker' or passerby might assume things about what I'm like based on my clothes that are incorrect. Interestingly this doesn't really have so much to do with the elaborateness of an outfit as long as it is comfortable, but the vibe. I can wear a flared hectic midi skirt and not feel this way, but feel this way wearing a pale blue button up oxford for example -- like I'm a little more preppy than my neighborhood or local stores, or myself.

Maybe there is a part of you that is grounded and practical and accessible and that dress was not holding up in the 'function' department and the 'form' had practical flaws.

Windchime

I just read some of the users' comments on the page about your dress. Others had the same issue you did with the slits. Interesting that you felt people were assuming you to be someone you aren't, when you wore this particular outfit. I suspect many of us struggle with the same thing when we veer too far outside our usual style perimeters. I know I do. Your "excessively decorative" insight will be useful to you when you evaluate other potential pieces for your wardrobe. As Rabbit said, this particular dress doesn't do it for you in either the form or the function department. I hope it's going back!

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

It's definitely going back, Windchme! The funny thing about Gwynnie bee is that you often have to add things to your queue when they are new and have no reviews, and then later you go to leave a review and see that others have already said everything you would say.

I think you're right, rabbit. There was nothing so impractical about the outfit in comparison to other things I wear all the time comfortably - heels, sure, but comfortable ones I can walk in. And the dress was rather waist surrendering and loose. It just felt too out there somehow, with the hem and all. Maybe the fact that I'd just had my hair colored (which I used to do myself) made me feel more an object of beauty than an actor myself.

Mander

I can understand this sentiment. I still have a lingering sense that caring about my appearance is somehow vapid and shameful, even though I would never think that about someone else. Wearing something that is trendy or in any way "flashy" really emphasizes this feeling for me.

Quietgirl

I hear you. Only you can understand how you felt.

Sixty years ago we wouldn't have had this discussion. We would have thought you fit in with everyone else 'cause everyone dressed up and looked nice. We had to go downtown to shop and there WAS no mall. And no one would have gone downtown in their jeans (unless it was my great-grandpa going to the hardware store for a item for his farm). There was no schlepping around in public in flannel pajama bottoms and house slippers. (I've seen that on teens when I get on a plane.) There are now books lamenting our "anything goes" dress code. http://www.amazon.com/The-Lost.....0465036716

I am sorry you had that experience. I also want to say thanks for trying to look nice.

Anonymous

Interesting. I kind of know what you mean. I (clearly!) don't mind girly or "pretty," but some outfits just make me feel prissy, for lack of a better word. And, like your experience, the colors or details of an outfit can push it in that direction even if it's not actually impractical or uncomfortable.

I also have weird issues with other types of clothes that may make someone assume I'm slightly different than I am. I think that's part of why I'm weird about avoiding preppy or sporty looks, but one thing.

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