ever been too PPP? - YouLookFab Forum

unfrumped

Hmm--are you saying it's within your budget? Then why wait? If you've calculated that the one coat will solve many issues there would be no particular reason to spend money on a different one.

What you may be saying is that you have not yet determined which is "the one" coat for you. I don't know if you've actually tried them on. That often settles a lot of lust, if the fit is not right for you.

Did you look up the huge threads on the Brooks Bros and Burberry trenches awhile back? Lot of analyses of cost, fit, one coat or a coat capsule.

Often after looking there is not the "one" coat but a choice. But you should really like the one you get. Sometimes the $$ is a great helper in making something look about as good--this is not settling, but making a decision--I really like this coat enough to get it so I can also get 3 pairs of boots! Or not.

Remember the 3rd P in PPP--practical--and Angie's comments on that.
I wrote yesterday that I decided on some shoes because I really couldn't find the shoes I had in my imagination, and meanwhile, sort of like your missing social events, I had outfits that I didn't wear as much because I needed a more comfortable shoe than what I had.

12 years ago

Anonymous

Good question. I've never been sorry when I stuck to PPP or bought a really great piece, even if pricey. Go for that Burberry.
I settle most often when trying out something or evolving my style. If it seems to work, I'd be inclined to spend more for a better quality replacement. Example, red jeans. I got an inexpensive NYDJ pair at the Rack. Now I would replace them with premium denim.

12 years ago

Windchime

Veteran

Hi, Amy--I'm quite new here and don't know you at all. But I was struck by your writing that you're opting out of various social events because you don't have appropriate clothing. For me, that would probably be when I'd compromise on PPP and just get placeholders so I could participate socially.
Good luck thinking it through. It's not easy; I think priorities keep shifting depending on circumstances.

12 years ago

Gigi

Veteran

As for how I make my second-best purchasing decisions, I guess I would say that I still really like the second-best item that I'm purchasing--I don't simply say, "Oh, this will have to do." It might not be the *perfect* item--maybe the quality is a little low, or maybe the color isn't exactly what I want, or maybe the fit is a little bit off--but at the same time, the overall effect on me is, "I like this!" and the item makes me feel good.

I decide where to compromise based on a few factors. One would be income, obviously, but that's not your issue. Another would be events--if I was backing out of events because I didn't have the right clothing, I would decide to compromise. Another time I would compromise is if I had already looked high and low for an item for a very long time and still could not fill the wardrobe hole. At that point I would start looking for a placeholder, because who knows how long it will be before the perfect one comes around? Life cannot be put on hold because we can't find the exact right thing.

If you buy the "second-best" coat, you can always get rid of it once the perfect one comes around, since you want only one. But I think a person can get too "picky" once her life starts being affected in negative ways by wardrobe holes.

12 years ago

Day Vies

Veteran

Second best... I never settle with coats. I love coats and have more than one more than five even but I see no point in settling with regard to a coat. it makes a big first impression and lasts for years. I wanted a trench that was the perfect shade of taupe (light silvery brown), did not have the detailing of a typical trench, lacked shoulder pads ( it was the late 90's at the time of the search) and did not require or come with a belt. It took me YEARS but I have had the same trench/raincoat for 13 years now and no -- it does NOT look dated and it drapes absolutely beautifully.

12 years ago

Amy

(website)

Veteran

If it means I'd be going pants-less or freezing because I don't have a coat, then I settle when the perfect items aren't immediately forthcoming. These could be classified as needs more than just wants.

In more picky about things that I can wait for like a pretty full skirt. I know I'd wear it a lot, but don't need it now.

12 years ago

Aida

Veteran

There are a few situations where, if I know an item would complete MANY outfits I want to wear for the season, I will get a "second best" but still continue to look for the perfect item. Sometimes that perfect item doesn't come along, and had I not bought a stopgap I'd feel sad that I missed out on wearing some trend or other. Generally though, fit isn't compromised as much as particular details. For example, I looked everywhere in spring for 3" severely pointed white pumps in leather and couldn't find my perfect pair. Instead I bought a pair with a softer point and shorter heel (and they fit superbly!), and have been very happy with the purchase! Had I not bought that pair I'd not have been able to wear, like, half the things I did in spring and summer

12 years ago

annagybe

(website)

Veteran

Wait, you are forgoing social events because you don't have clothes? Because unless it's formal black tie, well, that just makes me sad.

12 years ago

Alexandra

(website)

Veteran

Opting out of social events because you don't have appropriate attire even though budget is not an issue, is sad. If you have something specific in mind, you could easily have it custom-made by a local (or not quite local, depending on where you live) clothier/seamstress. This is often much less expensive than high-end brand names and the fit is perfect, not to mention you can pick your fabric, color, details, etc.

12 years ago

cinnamon fern

Veteran

OK, let's get concrete about this. What kinds of events do you have nothing appropriate to wear to? What would be the perfect outfit for those events? What elements of that outfit are you missing? Then we can talk about compromise outfits.

PPP makes the most sense as a principle for people who have a tendency to over-shop in one way or another. If you can't eg go to your friends' parties because you have nothing but the scrubs you wear to work, it might be time to just go to the mall and grab the first halfway decent little black dress you see.

12 years ago

Anonymous

When I try to get too minimlistic then I add another P to Angie's awesome PPP concept.

Perfect - which is a horrible thing for a perfectionist to add!

I had to let go of my minimalistic expectations while I rebuilt a wardrobe. I would love to have the "perfect" white shirt, but for now I have 2-3 shirts that allow me to get dressed easily.

While I love the idea of minimalism it really brings out the perfectionist in me so I have to be careful.

12 years ago

Mary Beth (formerly LBD)

(website)

Veteran

There is a really great article on The Minimalists site, about why paying full price and buying quality items can actually be worth your while. This concept really was an eye-opener for me - but I remembered this article at least half a dozen times in the past month, and walked away from a sales rack empty-handed.

http://www.theminimalists.com/fool/

12 years ago

minimalist

Veteran

This thread has helped me to realize I've been getting bogged down in the whole wardrobe situation. I need to re-focus on what made YLF feel accessible to me in the first place: Susie's thread on loungewear. http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....loungewear In my brief time here at YLF, I've already made progress in both home and at-bf's loungewear capsules, and need just a few more items. I can only do so much at once.

unfrumped and Joy,
I haven't found *the* coat yet. Tried on a Burberry at NR a while back, but before I'd found YLF. That coat fit well but was black, and I had it in my head that I wanted to get away from black. If I came across it today, I'd probably buy that coat as the second-best situation Gigi and Aida describe, and use scarves to soften the color. Thanks for referencing the threads on trenches!

Windchime,
Your insight about priorities is spot-on. Thanks for that.

cinnamon fern,
Events I regularly notice myself skipping are tech meet-ups I could attend on the way home from work (or as a way to get out when I've been working from home). Or there are times when a friend is making a day-trip somewhere to deliver a prototype and would like company, but I wouldn't feel comfortable dressed badly if it happened to involve client contact.

I'm not neglecting friends, really, but clothing limits spontaneity which makes every interaction "cost" more. Often, I decide which days to shower and put together an outfit based on which day a friend will be working in the city that week; we meet for coffee or dinner about every third time she's here, and decide it relatively last-minute.

Holiday events, I'm opting out of. I wouldn't have bandwidth for the required conversations at bf's work and friends' parties even if I had appropriate clothing. I'm skipping my own work's party as one more way of conveying that I'm not promotion material. (That's wardrobe-relevant in that I don't want them to see me cleaned up.)

Day Vies,
I feel the same way about coats. Your taupe trench sounds magical!

Amy,
You're right, warmth is a need. While weather here is far more temperate than it is where I'm from, it still gets cold, and it's damper here than almost anywhere I've been before.

mtgirl,
Thanks for the nudge to let go of minimalism while rebuilding. Simplicity is so much easier for me, once I have it, but getting there isn't easy.

La Belle Demimondaine,
I'd originally thought that one of the Ps was Price, as in being willing to pay full price for the right item.

fwiw, I'm set for black tie.

As for my non-financial barriers to figuring out and acquiring essential wardrobe items being "sad," as a couple of commenters stated, well, that's certainly one way of looking at This thread has helped me to realize I've been getting bogged down in the whole wardrobe situation. I need to re-focus on what made YLF feel accessible to me in the first place: Susie's thread on loungewear. http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....loungewear In my brief time here at YLF, I've already made progress in both home and at-bf's loungewear capsules, and need just a few more items. I can only do so much at once.

unfrumped and Joy,
I haven't found *the* coat yet. Tried on a Burberry at NR a while back, but before I'd found YLF. That coat fit well but was black, and I had it in my head that I wanted to get away from black. If I came across it today, I'd probably buy that coat as the second-best situation Gigi and Aida describe, and use scarves to soften the color. Thanks for referencing the threads on trenches!

Windchime,
Your insight about priorities is spot-on. Thanks for that.

cinnamon fern,
Events I regularly notice myself skipping are tech meet-ups I could attend on the way home from work (or as a way to get out when I've been working from home). Or there are times when a friend is making a day-trip somewhere to deliver a prototype and would like company, but I wouldn't feel comfortable dressed badly if it happened to involve client contact. That's my own regional and cultural hang-up; most people here truly don't care, but I can't seem to stop seeing dress as a respect thing.

I'm not neglecting friends, really, but clothing limits spontaneity which makes every interaction "cost" more. Often, I decide which days to shower and put together an outfit based on which day a friend will be working in the city that week; we meet for coffee or dinner about every third time she's here, and decide it relatively last-minute.

Holiday events, I'm opting out of. I wouldn't have bandwidth for the required conversations at bf's work and friends' parties even if I had appropriate clothing. I'm skipping my own work's party as one more way of conveying that I'm not promotion material. (That's wardrobe-relevant in that I don't want them to see me cleaned up.)

Day Vies,
I feel the same way about coats. Your taupe trench sounds magical!

Amy,
You're right, warmth is a need. While weather here is far more temperate than it is where I'm from, it still gets cold, and it's damper here than almost anywhere I've been before.

mtgirl,
Thanks for the nudge to let go of minimalism while rebuilding.

La Belle Demimondaine,
I'd originally thought that the last P was Price, as in being willing to pay full price for the right item. In the end, that's Practical, too.

fwiw, I'm all set for black tie.

12 years ago

Aida

Veteran

Amy, since you are working from home and don't always dress it may be worth keeping a little list of outfits in your closet for those last minute things that come up. Two levels perhaps, one for visiting friends and another that's a step dressier for prototype deliveries that may (or may not) involve seeing clients. It's also handy to try all these outfits on ahead of time so there aren't any surprises when their names get called. This way if something comes up there's no need to scramble, simply pick something off your list and you're good to go. I have a list like this for weekend looks of varying ruggedness exactly for those last minute things that come up.

12 years ago

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