Emotions around sizing - YouLookFab Forum

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Emotions around sizing

Carol

(website)

Veteran

They say that it is always wise to consider sizes that are up or down from the one you normally wear. Because of my large-ish cup size and broad shoulders, I know it is wise for me to buy shirts a size up from what my actual measurements are. Yet this is difficult for me, because I like to think of myself as trim.

Do you have issues around sizing, and flexible sizing? Or not? Just thought it could be an interesting topic, as I am a logical person who has extreme resistance around choosing the larger size. Maybe some other people are like me, maybe others skip around the size chart with gusto.

Dressing

15 replies

Latest reply was from Roberta

cat2

Veteran

Clip off the size tag when you clip off the weird plastic page of instructions?

Star

Veteran

Carol I used to be like you. Not any more, and not due to me changing my attitude and thinking but sizing has changed. Sizes are all over the place for different brands and even within brands. Proper fit is now important to me. No more uncomfortable pants with a too tight waist just because it is my number. I have a similar but different issue. Generally if jeans fit me in the waist they are too big in the bottom. Now that I thrift I do not look at the number on the tag. I hold up the garment and have an idea if it will fit. Sometimes I am way off but mostly not. When I get home and look at tags I am amazed at the varying numbers. I can fit into items that are S, M, or L. I can fit an EU 38/40/42/44. Same with shoes. I was always a UK 6 my entire life, the EU equivalent is 39. I have shoes 38/39/40. So to answer your question, I think it is impossible to be emotional regardng sizing today.

Star

Veteran

Cat2 the weird plastic 'book' of instructions....

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Star makes excellent points! It really is impossible to go by what it says on the tag. I read the garment measurements, when available. And consider the fabrication. Does it have stretch, or none. What is the cut like? Is it cut small in an area that is likely to create a problem for me, personally? (For me, a too short back rise in pants will be a problem, whatever the size, very narrow cut thighs in pants, ditto. A very open loose neckline will be sloppy on me, even in my supposed size. Etc.) Fit is more important than the number.

Cookie

Carol, I totally feel you even though I do not think of myself as trim, haha. It’s probably one reason I don’t wear jeans or trousers, though certainly not the only one. But for other garments, I am somewhat over it. The thing is it absolutely does not matter to any other person looking at you, even if they are paying attention.

SarahD8

Veteran

One of the lessons of the size fluctuations I've experienced in recent years is that I actually look trimmer in clothes that fit me properly with a bit of ease than in clothes that are too tight.

So on some level it's a matter of deciding whether your priority is *thinking of yourself* as trim (by wearing a garment that you know has a small size tag) or *looking* trim (by choosing a garment a size up.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Fits and sizes are all over the place across the globe!

Carol, first, I'm nodding along with Star, Suz, and SarahD8! Wise words from the three of them

Personally, I think clothing hangs better and looks better with a bit of ease. With some clients, I suggest a size up in an item because of this reason. Conversely, with other clients I suggest a size down because there is too much ease!

This brings me to good fit. I am old school in this regard. I aim to create a perfect fit. It adds polish to a look, and since I am big on polish - it's very important.

Some posts you might find helpful:

https://youlookfab.com/2023/02.....right-now/

https://youlookfab.com/2023/07.....efine-you/

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

Yes to what Star and everyone said. The numbers are so arbitrary and have different meanings over time and across brands. The number on the tag does not dictate how you look!

Firecracker (Sharan)

Veteran

I agree with all the wise responses here. And I also get the emotion that can sometimes attach to a size. I recall a time, maybe 15 years ago now (maybe longer?), when I wasn't aware of size inflation or deflation in women's clothing, or "vanity sizing" (i.e., the practice of putting ever decreasing numbers on a particular size of clothing, so a 6 became a 4, became a 2 . . . ). I remember trying on jeans in the size I was most often wearing in pants at the time, let's say 6. The salesperson brought a size down, and it fit much better. And they said, "look at you, wearing a size 4!" Which is kind of how I felt--wow, look, I'm wearing a size 4! The jeans were much more flattering than the ones I had been wearing, but I think I was almost as enamored with the size number on the tag as I was with the admittedly great fit. Which was the whole point of size deflation in women's clothes, IMO--to make us buy more. Once I got wise to it, it didn't work so well on me anymore. Haha! Talking about it with friends, and then hanging around YLF, I've come to the point where I'm not romanced by the numbers anymore.

Sal

Veteran

I think a lot of us can have a "size" in mind when shopping, it has become somewhat nonsensical. When I realised that I had both small and extra larges in my closet and fitting me, I realised it was crazy. If I am in a small then people will be sized out at the lower sizes.

I can certainly see why lycra and stretch fabrics are so popular, and why skinny jeans had a hold for a long time. And many manufacturers have not adapted to women who lift, or with more muscle. Many of our fit strong sports stars must find it a nightmare.

I am not especially emotional about the number now, but I know people who are. There is a lot of trauma with sizing and availability of options.

Lisa

Veteran

Great responses here already.

I don't pay attention to size because every manufacturer runs different. I own lots of sizes in my closet. I also have different sizes because of the fit I'm looking for. Sometimes I want a closer fit other times slightly loser. For example, my Gap straight leg jeans I deliberately wear one size larger because I want a loser fit.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Sizing is so fraught for so many of us. I do have a mental block about trying a size above a certain threshold — I almost feel insulted by the designer, even though that’s silly. But I have a lot of judgmental programming in my background about weight and size, which I work to combat. I’m stuck at my largest size and need to just get on with the business of getting dressed, so I suck it up and wear the 10 even though my ego wants the 8.

But it’s also true that sizing is completely arbitrary and I have stuff in my closet that fits, ranging from a 4 to a 12, an XXS to an XL. It’s silly to get wrapped up in a number with that in mind, so I’m learning to laugh it off. It only really bothers me when I’m shopping and a retailer only puts the tiny sizes out on display and makes customers ask for larger sizes (designer shops in NYC, I’m looking at you).

RobinF

Veteran

Such great responses here. I do judge myself about sizing even though I logically know that is ridiculous, but I also don't want to be uncomfortable so I get the size that fits even if it might be larger than I would like. I mostly try to let it go but, as Janet says, I have a background and lifetime of programming to try to overcome.

I do agree that you can't rely on stated sizes anyway. I get frustrated when sizing info says "fits as normal" because there isn't a normal.

Bijou

Veteran

When thinking logically I can accept that sizing does not matter at all, and I do disregard it when I am at my preferred weight. I get a bit more emotional when I am heavier than I like and find I need to go up a size.

Roberta

Veteran

And companies wonder why we return so much! I look at a "relaxed" top online and guess I might be . . . a large? And now that my waist is bigger and my behind is smaller, pants are a total crapshoot.

When I was a teen and we were wearing 9/10, 11/12, and so on, I cringed when when I had to get a 13/14. I would cut the tags out. Once I got to college and started thrifting and sewing for myself, sizes meant NOTHING anymore. I've tried to hang onto that mindset even when most of my shopping became new items.