Dressing Modestly in Japan - YouLookFab Forum

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Dressing Modestly in Japan

fleur_avenue

We've just moved to Japan from Puget Sound, WA. Having spent the last three years in the pacific northwest where the hottest day in summer was only 68 degrees, I have a wardrobe full of long sleeves, scarves, cardigans and boots. Now we're in Japan and it's already 66 in March. I need to update my wardrobe in preparation for the hot, humid summers here. I have tons of sundresses I've been patiently waiting to wear, but here's the trouble: How do I make my style fit in with Japanese style? I read Angie's post about Japanese style and I have noticed the super short skirts paired with looser layers. Super short skirts don't work for me; I'm in my 30s with two kids to chase. I've noticed that even though skirts are short, chests are usually covered. I've been thinking of going with some peter pan collared dresses, but I'm afraid that will just look way too young on me. Ideas on styles that will be cool for summer but still modest and age appropriate?

Dressing

20 replies

Latest reply was from E

Classically Casual

Veteran

Bumping...hope someone can help you...

Sarah A

Veteran

I really like wearing "toppers" (twill or denim jackets or knit blazers) over sundresses, if you have some you like already easy to add. It provides sun coverage and warmth in frigid AC.... and modesty.

As far as new purchase ideas i dont know on the peter pan collar (for me it is a "no" but I dont "know" your style), perhaps a higher cut sheath dress or an Armani neckline would give coverage and maybe not feel so young. Not this dress in particular for chasing young children but just to demonstrate what I think I mean by Armani neckline. The cut would cover the chest and might be available at a machine wash friendly pricepoint from another merchant.

http://couture.zappos.com/tibi.....-stretch-b

Adding an Armani... Armani neckline dress:

http://www.armani.com/us/empor.....8;tp=16716

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

A linen cardigan (or two) might be a good option to wear over some of your dresses. I don't think you need to resort to peter pan collars for coverage - why not just normal U-neck or slightly crew neck tops?

ironkurtin

Veteran

Eileen Fisher summer clothing. She bases a lot of it on traditional Asian dressing, believe it or not, and it's very flowy and cool.

rachylou

Veteran

I'd probably go sleeveless sheath and fit-and-flare dresses. Light-weight blouses and straight skirts. Cardigans. That is, I'd be more conservative in a foreign country, esp. as a wife and mother. I realise it's fashion forward Japan, but I'd still want the social lay of the land first.

ironkurtin

Veteran

It might help to define what you mean by modest dressing, too. Are there certain requirements you need to fulfill?

Anonymous

My thought is that it would be hard to dress too young in Japan at any age. He wears lots of linen in the summer and likes a fabric at Uniqlo for hot weather. You might see what they offer.
ETA: DS wears the men's tees under linen shirts to stay cool
http://www.uniqlo.com/us/women.....irism.html

TylerAnne

Maybe you could visit a couple of Japanese clothing stores to see what options they are offering? Uniqlo was nearly the only place I bought clothing when I lived in Japan, although Muji usually offers a few basics. Many of the other clothing stores seemed geared to the younger, fast fashion crowd.

I think both/either of those stores would give you a fair idea of what is on the conservative side of what people there are wearing. An added bonus is that if you find some items, you won't have to worry about ordering/shipping internationally.

Lisa

Veteran

A great question, I know loose fits and linen are supposed to be helpful in the heat.

UmmLila (Lisa)

Veteran

Look at Tory Burch tops and dresses, not necessarily to buy, but because she's the queen of modest necklines.

unfrumped

Veteran

Sounds like a problem is you can't get to observe what's what until you're in the season but you want to be prepared now. Any way to use internet photos of everyday life? Or is there anyone there (work, relocation help) that gives cultural advice? Some kind of filmy topper, cardi, or cropped boxy sweater (a thin linen or mesh type) worn over dress might work; also, depending on the dress style, wearing a white T ( or fun color) under the dress, as with a jumper, can be stylish and still cool. You said "tons" of sun- dresses--are these from your WA past but you just never got to wear them much? Are you talking about lots of spaghetti-strappy or strapless & backless dresses? Not sure if it will be practical to "make" those work if they're completely wrong for the culture. Can you select a few of the best candidates for makeovers?

froggiebecky

Veteran

Take it from someone who's done it (twice): don't try to buy for Japan in Puget Sound. There's no way you'll "get it right" and feel like a local. Besides, once you get there, there will be lots of cool things you find in Japan that you want to incorporate into your wardrobe!

DonnaF

Veteran

I remember when I was in Japan (gulp) close to 40 years ago, men and women would be pretty covered up and then change the underlayer like an undershirt a number of times during the day. The long loose sleeves would allow air to circulate and would absorb the sweat in the humid climate better than a very bare outfit. Apartments may be different, but back then most houses did not have central air or a window air conditioner; the most you could hope for was fans.

If it were me, I would go with IK's suggestion of Eileen Fisher and wear plenty of linen and cotton.

anne

Veteran

i also lived in Japan, in the 90's in my case, and I taught 2-4 year olds and came into contact with lots of mums.

i found that there were quite distinctive fashions and styles for Mums, and they were very different from the fashion forward looks sported by the young and trendy (though there there were also mums who just wore jeans loose t shirts)

Fashions may have moved on, but some distinctives I remember were canvas shoes (they would have had to walk more than many in North) bucket hats and dresses that were pinafore like in style. Kind of at the edge of frumpy and cute.

Of course you may not want to dress like a Japanese person anyway, and I hear you on the modesty issue. I think filmy cardigans are a good suggestion.

I do agree with the suggestions to shop when you get there. Oh wait - you are already there! Have you looked at shops yet? I don't know your size, but if you are sized out of Japanese clothing (back then, at 5"4 and around 125 pounds I was a "large" could fit a medium when I lost 10ish pounds) GAP used to be helpful to taller expats that I knew.

All the best!

rachylou

Veteran

Oh, thie size thing could be a problem. I traveled the continent of China and learned I was pretty much a heffer. I thought I'd be able to shop...

fleur_avenue

Lots of great advice! Thanks everyone. I will look into Eileen Fisher's styles. When I say modesty, I mean covered up in the right places. Most women here who are my age wear crew or boat-neck loose tops and skinny jeans or capris. This kind of look isn't flattering on me, it's going to take some tweaking to find the right balance.

Also, I have several tattoos and tattoos are frowned upon here. Some places, like our local beach, prohibit tattoos to be showing, so I like the idea of linen cardigans. I'm not trying to look Japanese per se, just trying to be respectful and not offend.

Shopping locally is a bit of challenge because I am not built like a Japanese woman. I'll give Uniqlo a try and see if I can find something there.

In the mean time, I did find a peter pan collar dress at ModCloth that I really like. It will probably be the only one I ever buy, but it is nice, and the arm & back tattoos are pretty much covered.

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DonnaF

Veteran

Would you consider using Dermablend or other makeup to cover at least your arm tats in order to give yourself more clothing options?

You are slender, so it's interesting that Japanese clothing doesn't fit you. Broad shoulders? I am 100% ethnically Japanese, but I think I have a more American build than one would find in Japan. My color taste and sense of aesthetics is definitely American, at least from my memories of what it was like there over 40 years ago.

ironkurtin

Veteran

I really think Eileen will work for you. Check out eBay, although I don't know about shipping to Japan. Good luck!

krishnidoux

Veteran

I, like Anne, also lived in Japan in the nineties. I taught French in Ginza, Tokyo and came in contact with lots of trendy young women from the middle and upper class.

I can attest to the "frumpy/cute" dynamics in women's clothes: for example below the knee pencils with short socks and flat shoes. Street style with LOTS of grey, and accessories with grey in it, almost no vivid /frank colors. I find your pink dress adorable.

In Japan, I found that dress really defined what role one had in society. A nice prim dress might be associated with OL's ("office ladies") so if you're not, you've got to be careful about that. I had found some fantastic grey below the knee pencils, only to be told later that this was the obaasan style (aging mother).

The women I taught to downtown always dressed with one eccentric element, such as a hat or a scarf out of the ordinary, that set them apart from set groups. This might be a good strategy for you if you don't wish to be cast in one or another category.

In general, women wear more skirts.

E

Veteran

What about loose mid-thigh shorts instead of the short skirts? I don't know if that's frowned on or not though.

Honestly, I wear cotton/silk/linen or some blend thereof long sleeve cardigans even outdoors in the summers here (over 100 every day & humid as well), because I like the extra sun protection for my arms. If I leave them unbuttoned, or just button the top one, they still let breezes come through. But I wear them over boxy lightweight higher necked blouses, which it sounds like you're not a big fan of. You could try it over your sundresses though. I love looking at photos from Japanese sewing books, but I find the cutely frumpy look Anne described quite appealing. hehe Here's a blogger who likes the aethetic too.

What is it about the loose top/fitted skinnies formula that you don't like on yourself? Perhaps the forum can help you tweak things. Looking at your photo, I'd have thought you'd make an ideal candidate for waist surrendering!