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Does menopause make you.....

Angela K

Veteran

Ok, I know this is a little weird discussing menopause on a fashion and style site but...what better place to survey a cross section of women with different experiences. So here goes: I am in the beginnings of menopause (perimenopause) and I find that I get overwhelmed almost to the point of being frantic very easily. I am an accountant/bookkeeper by trade but basically run a small office. And sometimes just the multi-tasking element along with simply juggling work, phones and personalities leaves me nuts and exhausted. Anyone else experience anything like this? If not then what have you found to be the biggest challenge with menopause and perimenopause? Any and all input is appreciated!

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17 replies

Latest reply was from Jeanie

Anonymous

I'm not menopausal or even pre-menopausal just yet, although my age suggests I should be. Like you, I'm a bookkeeper, and my job entails a lot of different duties. I, too, get overwhelmed at times. My solution is to delegate. Whenever possible, I get my DDs to run errands, clean house, etc. My DH is very supportive about dinner. If I don't feel like cooking (I have sciatica, and when it flares up, it's really painful), he's fine with ordering pizza or something. In a nutshell, I do whatever I can to not overload myself with too much to do. Some days I feel like Super Woman and get a lot accomplished. But other days simply aren't like that at all. Hope this helps.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Angela, I guess I'm in perimenopause -- I may not even know for sure when I'm truly menopausal because I had my uterus removed earlier this year. Ovaries are still intact, so in theory I'm still having hormonal cycles but no periods (yay!). I feel great most of the time since the surgery, and the symptoms from fibroids have gone away, but I do notice some inexplicable moodiness or feeling overwhelmed by my emotions at times, which I have been chalking up to my hormonal cycle. I have been meaning to keep a record of these moody times, to try to track the changes during a given month and get a sense of whether my cycles are even slightly regular (they were starting to get irregular in the past year).

I think that emotional fragility can be a part of menopause, but I can certainly see how your life and its demands can leave you feeling overwhelmed, regardless of where you are in life!

biscuitsmom

Veteran

I found I was very emotional, although I was going thru a very rough time, so that could be the reason. The worst problem I had was uncontrollable sweating- I needed to change clothes halfway thru my day...

Suz

(website)

Veteran

I'm not sure that it's menopause so much as the fact that this period of women's lives tends to be just plain busier than almost any other. We are juggling multiple roles (parent, professional, often caregiving to older relatives) and we have so many people's business to keep track of in addition to our own. Or at least that is my excuse, and I am sticking to it!

In all seriousness, hormonal changes may make multi-tasking more difficult, but in general, multi-tasking is just plain hard, and we'd probably all be better off if we could focus on one thing at a time. When I begin to get anxious I usually know it is time to cut some things off my list of "to dos." And to take some "me" time. For me, exercise and sleep are crucial. If I shortchange myself on either of those, I pay for it in muddled thinking, high anxiety, and stress.

Kim

Veteran

I am perimenopausal, (hot every night, but now it comes in flashes...LOL) but I can't say I feel overwhelmed by multi tasking, but I am pretty careful about how much I take on in my life.

My dear friend went through a VERY rough transition into menopause and it messed up her hormones so badly she became clinically depressed for the first time in her life. (We've been friends since we were 13 so I know that's the truth. )She went onto an anti depressant for a short while and that seemed to sort her out emotionally. She's off them now (has been for years) but watches carefully for any signs of a return episode, so as not to wait so long to go see her doc if it happens again.

So the hormones can certainly have strong effects on your moods, and no you are not crazy to think so!

Not sure what you can do about it, but talk to your doctor, s/he can help.

cheryle (Dianthus)

(website)

Veteran

Count me in the group. I have had trouble with sleep for a few years now. I don't get hot flashes but am usually uncomfortably cold in the evening and wake up feeling overly warm in the morning. My allergies have intensified as well and I sometimes feel like I have an extra special PMS that lasts for weeks on end. I am tired and irritated when it happens.

I did some research and read that most often it is estrogen dominance that causes many symptoms. I bought a natural progesterone cream to try to balance things out. It seemed to work well the first month - the sugar cravings subsided and I slept better but I have been forgetting it half the time.

MuseumGal

Veteran

Everyone has their own special set of hell I mean symptoms, but for me, absolutely, concentrating and keeping it together are nearly impossible. I'm 46 and have been dealing with these symptoms for about 5 years now - I call it Menopause Brain.

MsMaven

Veteran

Perimenopause was crazy time for me. The doctors told me to get more exercise, but didn't ask how much exercise I was already getting. I did more and it made the symptoms worse.

In my case what made it worse than ever was that I didn't know what to expect and didn't think it would happen to me when it did.

Luckily, a lot more is known about this passage through life. Estrogen fluctuations can influence your brain, memory, physical symptoms and just about anything you can think of. Every woman is different. I would say, that if you think the problem is perimenopause, it probably is.

Angela K

Veteran

Thanks for all your insights. It really helps to know that I'm not alone in feeling this way.

Ruth, I do think you are on to something with it being the nature of the job. I guess it's just more difficult when you are a one person show. I have no one to delegate to at work and my husband works much longer hours than I do so most of the cooking and shopping falls to me. But he does do the laundry, vacuum and make the bed! But as you so wisely pointed out, I do need to pay more attention to areas that I can "let go of". Hard when you are a control freak like I am!

Janet, glad your surgery was successful and brought you relief from the fibroids. I have a friend who has experienced that so I know how awful they are to deal with. The rest is no picnic either. I totally agree with you and Suz, about the demands that are placed on most of us at this time in our lives. The problem is that we don't seem to get any credit from others for all the balls we are juggling. That's ok, but it would be nice if people understood that sometimes you just have to say "no, I'm sorry, I just can't take on anything else...."
Suz, I too find that sleep and exercise are no longer luxuries but absolute necessities. However, although I make time for exercise everyday, sometime I have to give up sleep time to fit everything else in. I know....not smart!

Kim, thanks for sharing your experience as well as that of your friend. I am glad that she is doing well. I am dealing with the power surges as well! What a pain, can't get one when you are freezing--that would just be too convenient!

MuseumGal- lol! I would have to agree with you about Menopause Brain. Think I'll use that with my boss, next time I am close to edge.

I really do appreciate all the insights. If I neglected to acknowledge anyones comment, please forgive. I'm still getting used to the protocol for postings. It really helps knowing that I'm not crazy or incompetent.

deb

Veteran

I was in my late 30's when I went through menopause and I think I had PMS for 5 straight years. It feels so good when it is all over, though. Hang in there, take lots of mini breaks between chores, and drink a lot of water. For whatever reason, the water helped regulate the hot flashes.

Angela K

Veteran

Deb --Thanks for the tip about drinking more water, that's easy enough to do.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Oh, we all shortchange ourselves on the sleep. It's endemic. I do it, too. But if I do it too much, I know I pay for it, so I try to remind myself (er, like right now) to get to bed!

Neel

Veteran

I am not menopausal and I am atleast 10 years younger and I still go through what you described! I think we women are cursed with some kind of hormonal issue all throughout our lives! I blame everything on my new contraceptive pills. Earlier I blamed it on my new mum hormones! Going forward it would be menopause I am sure. I so wish I was always *normal* ..... like men Rant over!

Anonymous

Angela, I too suffer from anxiety and often feel overwhelmed and flustered I am definitely menopausal. I have always been a slightly anxious person but menopause seem to intensify these anxious feelings. I have been seeing a natural path for several years and taking several natural remedies ( Estro-Vera, sage, vit. D) but the best remedy for me was meditation!! I found it extremely difficult at first. It is very hard to relax and breathe when you are feeling so overwhelmed but after a few tries it really started to work. If you are at all interested in giving meditation a try I have the name of a website that has free guided meditations. It is http://www.fragrantheart.com
It is a great guide!! Good Luck!!

Angela K

Veteran

Dianne, thanks for the suggestion. I find that meditation (in the form of prayer) does help a great deal. Sometimes, it's hard though to find a quiet moment in my workday to focus. I have been working on this. Even if its just for a few moments, I can see enormous benefits.

rebekahphoto

Veteran

Thanks Angela, this has been a very interesting an enlightening thread, & thanks for all the input ladies!

I have enjoyed (!-haha) crazy hot flashes for the last 2 years, brought on by exercise, stress, temperature changes, you name it! Feeling all the classic symptoms of tiredness, mid-section weight gain, anxiety, mental fog, etc. & thinking its some early peri-menaupause. My mom had her uterus removed when I was a baby (enodmetriosis), and later in her mid 50s the ovaries were removed and it was --boom, instant pause. Not too much fun.

Dianthus, your mention of "estrogen dominance" sparked a little light in me, and I had some very interesting, and very appropriate research last night!
I had asked my Dr if I should have a hormone test, since I have not felt right for a while & she said "oh no, they don't really tell you anything...blah blah"
So I think a holistic approach is now necessary, more water, rest, meditation etc. & see if there is improvement.

The bonus for my friends is since I cant wear warm, chunky sweaters anymore, they have all received them!

Jeanie

Veteran

Angela, I am nodding my head at everything dianne wrote. Yoga and meditation have been my saviors. The more us control freaks can learn to let go the better. Good luck to you.