I'm definitely in Camp Casual Wear

I prefer easy, comfortable clothes and don't really have too many occasions where I need to dress up.

Prior to 2015, I would have definitely said dressy. I would never wear sneakers to work. Jeans were always dark wash and worn with heels or booties. Now, it is jeans/pants/leggings with sneakers or low heeled/flat shoes or booties. It's hard for me to not be able to wear a dress or skirt because of their impracticality in my current work environment.

Kkards, that’s your white privilege at work. Not trying to single you out—I have it too, obvs.

Those are gorgeous saris, Roxanna. Wow. You must look spectacular in them. I'd love to see a WIW with one of those if you ever get a chance. And how brilliant that you can thrift them for a good price! Fantastic because they don't go out of style. Timeless beauty.

I'm a creature of juxtapositions. In my 20s, in university, I was definitely dressy. I wore skirts and dresses even as an undergrad and rarely wore jeans! People used to tease me. I also wore a lot of vintage back then so had a bit of a retro flair.

Then in my 30s, when I was teaching high school full time, I was quite casual. I taught at a rural school and as casual as I tried to be, I was always dressier than most...

Now, I like to mix it up. My lifestyle veers very casual, but my preferences are dressy, so I often wear items from both categories in an outfit, and luckily this works pretty well for me.

Roxanna- great post and I was interested in your tale- and pleased you showed them up!

I relate most to Janet’s comment. My needs are 90 percent very casual but I do dress up more than most of my peers at work and socially.

Team dressy. Back in high school there was a running joke about how i couldn't make it more than about 2 days without wearing a dress - they're just more comfortable for me.

That said, I do adjust the dressiness factor for the time and location. Early career in the midwest, business casual meant that you could wear the pants part of your suit instead of skirt and heels. Now in Silicon Valley, anything goes.

I think a lot of this is personal preference. I have a domestic engineer friend who is perfectly put together whether its a 7am dance drop off or a 3pm coffee date. I have work friends who live jeans and thermals and couldn't care less that their peers are more dressed up. Vive la difference!

I’ve always considered myself in a casual category. But your question made me think and evaluate my clothes. I like jeans but never wear them with sneakers. My shoes are more refined. I don’t like to look too polished and prefer one casual piece plus one dressy in an outfit. Like pairing a silk top with either jeans or linen pants. I don’t wear t-shirts and have a closet full of white shirts. Yet, my white shirts are oversized and not too crispy. I wear my two classic wool coats with oxfords and cropped wide pants or jeans. Who am I??? I think we all have our own definition of what casual or dressy means. My casual might be someone’s dressy

Great question, and I look forward to reading all the replies later, but just popping in to say first and foremost: please share some WIW sari pics with comments on styling/accessories! I wear a sari very occasionally for family functions...

As for me, I would say that I am more formal/fashion-conscious than most people around me, but I live in a *very* casual North Eastern city where people wear flannel and chinos to the symphony. That said, I travel a lot, and like to fit in as much as possible wherever I go, which means dressing somewhat more sharply. Call me "cosmopolitan nomad" or "airport chic."

Team dressy and I have been this way since a young child when I was the one at a family BBQ wearing a long dress. I just feel more myself in formal clothing.

Roxanna as a ENFP, I agree with your comment about having the desire to have a less disciplined approach to wardrobe management. I have to be analytical and disciplined in my job, for me dressing is more intuitive and fun, so I don’t need to be super practical and if I want to wear sequins on the weekend, then so be it. I am also upset to hear that you have been discriminated against. When I was 18 I remember going into a high end boutique because I loved a jacket in the window. The sales assistant shooed me out, saying that they did not have clothing for students. The insult still stings after so many years.

Also, Roxanna, any SA who would be so rude as to refuse to allow you to try on a dress is (I hope!) not working in customer service any more. How insulting .Imagine if she or he could see your TED talk!!!

Thanks everyone for your kind comments about the Dress episode. I did feel pretty frustrated abs angry in the moment, but was happy to have my sartorial revenge the Truth is that because I live in Toronto, I am less used to bald faced discrimination; but privilege is something I see and feel everyday (as most women do.)

Bijou - I totally agree! I am planned and disciplined in my job (which I love) but I do see my wardrobe add a place to have a break from that and let my moods guide me

Forgot to say that saris are the most feminine clothing items I know about, and yours are very beautiful. Would love to see you wearing them.

Roxanna- that’s awful and I’m sorry it happened to you. What is wrong with people???

I tend toward dressier for a few reasons.

When I was young in my career, my manager (a woman of 50, I was 30 at the time) suggested that I was dressing too young and people wouldn’t take me seriously. I was embarrassed by this, and as is my approach took accountability and fixed the “problem” *** immediately. (MORE ON THAT BELOW). I have always worked in a corporate environment where casual Fridays are the only time you can wear jeans. And they are always dressier jeans for me.

I also like a crisp, polished look, with more structure, which I think tends to seem dressier. I wear loafers or flats instead of sneakers. I often wear skirts or dresses instead of shorts. I LOVE wearing jeans but put them together in an outfit with other dressy elements. Honestly, I want to dress like the rich people on old soap operas- slacks and silk blouses with heels! I just haven’t reinterpreted that to current style yet.

****About my “problem” above. Until recently, my take on that was that boss was doing me a favor and helping me to project the image that matched my work. Recently, however, I relayed this to a current co-worker because we were talking about radical candor (when you are direct but kind to someone in giving them feedback). My co-worker was appalled and thought it crossed the line. It been 20 years, so the embarrassment and sting from the moment are gone. I am still entirely grateful that my manager gave me this feedback and I believe she had the best of intentions. She treated me fairly for the short time we worked together.

I am mulling all of this over and may do a post about age, dressing, style and the corporate world. ....

I’m sorry you had that experience with the SA. I had a similar one about ten years ago, but not based on my ethnicity. We were getting ready for a trip, and I was doing laundry, when the washing machine broke. We hurried over to Sears to order a new one. I was wearing old worn jeans with holes at the knees. I wanted a low water use model. They were more expensive, but we live in a desert, and water is a precious commodity. The SA assumed, based on my appearance, that we couldn’t afford a top of the line washer, and wouldn’t show it to us. It was annoying and frustrating. When Sears went out of business, I was only a little bit sorry.

JAileen, that is horrible!! Wow. So sorry that happened to you.

@Tammyb - I would love to see a post on that because I think the forum members would have such valuable viewpoints. I was given the same feedback by a co-worker when I was around 24, and while it was radical candor, I was grateful to her for being so honest with me. I think I would have felt the same way of it was a boss - as long as it was delivered in a kind and respectful way.

Also - I TOTALLY agree with you, is love to dress like rich people on old soap operas!! You made me laugh out loud. I would just gaze out windows all day with a perplexed look on my face.

Thank you all for all the love for the saris - I wore one today so I'll post a pic later.

Jaileen - I'm so sorry you went through that. What Ann awful experience at a time when you could have used kindness.

Roxanna, your saris are incredibly beautiful! I am so sorry about your experience with the sales associate. I have had a few similar experiences. DH and I were researching lakeside properties. I went into a real estate office to inquire about one we really liked. The realtor looked at me and said, “Well, you need really deep pockets for that one”, then turned on her heel and walked away. I was shocked at her rudeness and stunned that she had judged my pocket depth. Needless to say, we went with a different realtor.
In the last few years I have become more casual in both my work wear and my weekend wear, however I am still more “dressed up” than most people around me. The only time I find myself super casual is when I am enjoying adventures in grandparenting. Everything is machine washable and durable. Never unkempt or sloppy, but definitely much more casual.

Roxanna,

Let me join the chorus of others saying how wrong discrimination is. We all know WASP and wealth privilege are real.

I “get” dressy looks (as in “special occasion”) more than casual ones and am better at putting them together—largely a function of my coming-of-age era, I guess. Even on the dressy-casual/casual-dressy spectrum, I feel more confident styling “dressy.” This led me to buy for a fantasy life more often than I should have. YLF has taught me to buy more everyday basica and keep dressy to a small capsule.

Dressy. I was out of college and teaching before women had a choice of wearing pants. Even then, it was those awful polyester pant suits. My parents dressed up daily by today’s standards. Even my mother, who did not work outside the home, wore only dresses and jewelry daily. Dad wore a suit, white shirt, and tie daily. Neither ever wore jeans or tee shirts.
Like Angie, I like to wear frocks and do not wear shorts or sandals. Seldom do I wear tees, and then only to peek out from under a blazer or other jacket.
I know retirement living should be casual, but we create occasions to dress up more. I am usually one of the most dressy in the room and do not care. Like Mainelady, adventures with grandchildren force some more casual outfits, but I don’t want to appear sloppy. i wear jeans only because they fit better than other pants and are easily washed.

Casual for me for sure! I am a CPA so in my early career days I had to wear suits and blazers, which I didn't really mind, but am so happy now that I don't have to. I work in the office of a manufacturing facility, the only woman so no one really notices anyway, but can wear what I please and jeans on Friday. Yay! Not sure why I prefer casual, maybe just the comfort, but I also don't like to feel overdressed even for dressy occasions.

Kind of dressy. I refused to wear jeans until I was nine. I frequently wore skirts to uni. I like tailored clothes.

But not dressy like Angie!

I do have a shadow style hankering after athleisure.

(It probably goes without saying but I hated that story about the SA. I'm sorry you had to endure that.)

I love seeing your outfits in particular, Roxana, because they are so luxe and formal. Have you ever seen Suits? You dress like Jessica - gorgeous, luxe, feminine, powerful, unique. It's how I'd like to dress in my next life.

For this life, though, I think the best description for me is sharp casual. I love a masculine influence so I am (1) almost always in pants, and (2) when not with clients, almost always in jeans. Despite that, I wouldn't say my style is totally casual, because I tend to pair even jeans with a trim button-down or interesting top, nice (usually silver!) shoes or booties, and a good jacket or coat. I can't really do ultra-comfortable casual, or gear-as-casual, both of which lack the sharpness I need. However, I dress that way to work out and to walk the trails with my dogs. Unlike Angie, I don't "dress" for the doggy walking. LOL.

I'm loving reading all the comments here - so many interesting viewpoints!

@Firecracker - your outfits always do look well considered and thought out to me. You rock casual and dressy looks equally well. Abe if I could be anyone - I would dress as Olivia Pope from Scandal! (But again - I certainly wouldn't want her job!)

@mainelady - what a horrible experience. I wonder if that rep knows she lost her commission because of how she treated you!

@Joy so interesting to hear that your mum wore dresses and jewelry even from home... And how your parents have influenced your style.

@viva - that is so kind of you! You made me blush I haven't watched suits but I plan to. I have definitely been inspired by the menswear tilt to your style and I find myself incorporating more and more of that lately.

Oh, yeah... I hate sales snobs with a passion and am sorry to read how many of you have had bad experiences with those who think themselves superior.

So with you about that Cee! I find some younger “cool” looking women in clothes shops can appear that way recently. In fact I felt put off trying a top on last week in a shop because of how two of them were talking to each other and ignoring me after glancing at me up and down. It was fair enough they were having a conversation together as there was no other customer in the shop when I walked in. I know it’s hard for them to get it right but I felt dismissed and like I didn’t want to stay in there any longer. So I left- and still haven’t tried the top! Must gird my loins and try again.
The thing is that we might well have deeper pockets than we might “look” like we have, right? And recessions often expose how many people have everything on tick, who is “swimming naked when the tide goes out”.

" Treat everyone with respect " seems to have slipped away somewhat when it comes to basic customer service with some SAs.

Jenni, is that not the way customer service goes in NZ? In the US I’m accustomed to an almost unctuous “can I help you” whereas in Germany they seem to expect to finish their conversation before they get to you, and think I’m a very strange foreigner indeed if I interrupt to ask what aisle the padlocks are on. That’s right—it’s not just in clothing stores, it’s everywhere. Want 200 g of ground chuck? Fine, but not til I’m done telling Hans this funny story about last night. At least I know that isn’t because I’m not dressed right for it.

Usually I get good service, I’m sometimes allowed to look at the racks for a minute or two before being politely asked if they can help- sometimes “or am I just browsing?” which gives me a perfect out! Yes, just browsing thanks.
I have been back in there this afternoon and they were not talking, one of two was only just returning to the store. So I took the bull by the horns and asked to try the top I was interested in. The young woman was then very attentive and pleasant. Sadly the top did not hang well at the back, after all that.
Sorry Roxanna, bit of a thread-jack!

FashIntern - Obsequious service is so very American, is it not? My young friend’s German-American boyfriend and I were bonding over stories about summers with German grandmas and feeling a terrible need to apologise to German shopkeepers for wanting to buy something. Nothing says Love and Home like being told to hold your horses when there’s no other customers in the shop. Lol