It is definitely a little deflating - and I can see it in the eyes of others who are dressed to the nines (like recently on vacation at an awesome resort in Cuba, when they saw other diners arriving in shorts and flip flops - which by the way so broke the dress code.)

Where I live, many women seem to love fashion and dress stylishly - whether it's on trend or some unique funky version of it - so I definitely am conscious if I'm dressed down, and it's more encouraging to dress well here. My closest friend often makes me feel closet-envy with her happening wardrobe, so it's a lot of fun to go out with her & get inspiration. I try to keep in mind, though, that she is a completely different size & body type from me (ultra slim), so I know our styles must diverge. Still, I like to admire her style, as I do with so many here on YLF.

There have been times when I literally come home from an event where I was so inspired by the personal styles and impeccable fits, etc., that I scoop up every piece of ill-fitting, dowdy, unflattering clothing I own and shove it into the Goodwill bag for drop-off the next morning! Maybe someone else can re-purpose them but I'd never want to see them again. So yes, it can be influential to see others' sense of style & aesthetic.

There are times when it bothers me, but it also bothers me that I notice. My friend who is retired and lives in a very small hippie town leaves her nice clothes in my closet to wear when she comes into "the city"! I'm very live and let live. YLF was like learning to read for me - now that I know certain things I can't go back and un-notice them (like PPL!). Sometimes I wish I could...

Yes, it does. If I'm going out with a group of friends, I'd rather look like I belong, not like I'm trying too hard. I can still look fab in a casual way. But I don't want to be in a pencil skirt and bf jacket if everyone else is in jeans. I now make a point of telling/asking my mom friends if they want to get gussied up for a night out or if we're just going casual (both fine)...because sharing the excitement of dressing up for ourselves and others is fun!

Yes - it can be kind of deflating for me if I'm really honest about it. I love dressing up for special occassions - so when others show up NOT dressed up, then I feel like it takes away from the "specialness" of the event. Like they don't value it as much as I do - but, I know that is probably a wrong assumption on my part.

As far as everyday dress goes, it doesn't really bother me if others aren't dressed up as much, or obviously haven't put any thought into what they are wearing, etc. . - its just those special occassions that I am disappointed about!

I thought I was the only one. I live in a rural area, so most people around me tend to dress in tees or sweaters and jeans or even yoga pants.... gasp! I enjoy getting dressed up and putting thought into my outfits, but sometimes I feel like those around me think I'm trying too hard.

My husband constantly comments on my attire when we go out. "We're just going to a Stag & Doe you know?" I know he just doesn't get it, but sometimes it bothers me 'cause I feel like he should be proud to have a wife who takes time to look good.

I've always thought it would be wonderful to go to New York for New Years just so I have an excuse to really glam and sparkle it up.

In a word, yes!

I was fuming when I went to Porgy and Bess in August. Admittedly it started very early (not quite a matinee) and it was a warm day but there was a couple where the man was wearing cargo shorts and the woman was wearing brown capris. I was wearing this. It was opening night too.

I"m so glad to have all of you to commiserate with me.

Kimlee... that is the exact same conversation I have in front of my closet when these situations arise.

Crystal~ while he has gotten better, I have often heard from my hubby upon seeing me get ready to go out... "Oh, I guess this means I have to dress up?" argh!

I know it shouldn't, but it does take some of the fun out of things for me as well. I love dressing up and will whether others are or not, but it's always more fun when we all do it because I like seeing what others wear as much as I like choosing what I'm going to wear.

Maybe a bit, but then I was a girl who wore a blazer and felt hat at times to school (when I could have worn jeans)

I think I'd only mind if I was the only one - and in my town there is always a great range in dressing, so there will be someone dressed nicely.

Ditto what Una said. I'm also a "live and let live" kind of person, but it annoys me when I start judging how other people are dressing--since I don't like it when I get singled out because of the way I dress. Although there's a line between a genuine compliment and a "wow you pay more attention to your clothes than I do" kind of comment.

Same here, Aida and Una. A couple of friends came to my office to have lunch with me this week, and they were both wearing mom jeans and hoodies and sneakers, while I was all dolled up as usual in my work clothes. And yeah, I noticed and was irked at them for not making an effort, and irked at myself for being irked.

It's all more complicated than you might think, isn't it?