discovery...i like shopping more than dressing - YouLookFab Forum

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discovery...i like shopping more than dressing

jayne

Veteran

I seem to spend a huge amount of time shopping, you know, looking, trying, reading blogs, , online browsing, etc etc. but compared to the time I actually want to spend trying on outfits at home, I am not sure my addiction is related to actually clothing myself. how do I break out of this crazy, unproductive cycle. Luckily, I have avoided purchasing too much because I have the list. But the list is getting harder and harder to stick to! Help, ladies, what to do??

Dressing

15 replies

Latest reply was from jayne

catgirl

Veteran

Perhaps this is the kind of situation that calls for SYC for a bit, forcing you to work within your closet? I also love shopping more than dressing, only because my climate is so limiting, thus far more items appeal to me than are actually practical for me to wear.

Maybe you can show us what you have and we can help come up with outfits for you? I know that helped me. Heather and Jonesy (and many others) are especially creative with other people's closets, AND they somehow remember what everyone else owns. Recruit some YLFers to help out!

jayne

Veteran

SYC is ok. It is the lack of enthusiasm for the closet compared to the store that I am disappointed over. Needing some wisdom on how to puff up the enthusiasm.

Caro in Oz

Veteran

I agree with alaskagirl. Post some outfits to get some feedback/great ideas - the enthusiasm will follow.

Keix

Veteran

Are there specific items, just one or two pieces, in your closet that you LOVE? Go back to those and give yourself permission to wear them repeatedly, only if you style them differently with other items in your closet.

I'm an emotional splurger, so I end up with pricey pieces that I adore but don't necessarily wear. If I'm feeling bored with my closet, I go back to those heart-fluttering pieces to remind myself why I do care about fashion.

Kim

Veteran

I dislike changing and tweaking and taking pics and tweaking some more, so I bought a dress form (dressmakers dummy) and she does most of the hard work for me! I bought an adjustable one so that it would be my exact measurements, that way I can see if something would look reasonably like it would on my real figure, not my imaginary one! LOL (You know, the one like the model I saw wearing the outfit...)

It was the best money I've spent! I will play around with that one for quite a while and get an outfit to a pretty near perfect stage before *I* have to put it on and see if it "might" need anything else. (Usually not.)

I can also alter clothing on her, because she doesn't mind being stuck with a few pins in the name of a good fit! LOL

Right now she's wearing my new leopard cardigan, (bought for the fall) with my long sleeve button down shirt and my new Fossil bag and a skinny belt. She looks pretty good!

JR

Veteran

How to puff up the enthusiasm? Spend some fun time with a mirror and try all kinds of new combinations. Today I was trying to figure out how to style a pair of white capris that are too baggy on me. So I went column of white with a blouse I normally only wear in the winter and was absolutely wowed. I can hardly wait for a chance to try it.

And I was trying all kinds of possibilities with things in my reward drawer the other evening (I have clothes that are too small or at least used to be in there, and I get to pull a new one out every time I lose a pound) and found some combinations that had me so excited I could hardly sleep. I couldn't believe I could look that good. Talk about motivation to take off the next couple of pounds!

And of course, to make me excited about the things in the closet. A dress-up session might be all you need.

Mo

(website)

Veteran

Like Kim, I don't always wear it myself. I hang the clothes on a valet and take outfit idea pics. Some days I do just play with trying a bunch on, but not too often. There is also the option of using Polyvore and closetcouture, etc.
I have been making myself dress every day, although 90% of my FL time I am literally sitting alone in the house with the cat. I need to wear what I have to really see what I want to keep, how it works with other pieces, and what just looked good when I was in shopping mode.
I remarked to the BF how it's funny that I sit alone in real clothes all day, and about an hour after he arrives home from work and takes off his dress clothes, I'm into loungewear or PJ's. He said he loves me in PJ's anyway, which is true, he's bought me dozens of sets over the years!

Maybe with your next purchase(s) you should rethink anything that doesn't get worn very soon (seasonally appropriate of course). In my experience, the loved items you can't wait to wear.

ironkurtin

Veteran

Sounds like the fantasy is more fun for you than the reality. Also, looking triggers endorphins in the brain which is why it is so hard to stop (I learned that from another YLF member).

If actually dressing isn't as much fun - and I personally don't do the make-up-outfits thing beforehand, so if you don't enjoy it, you are not alone - then I suggest setting an alarm and religiously limiting your looking time.

Gaylene

Veteran

I'm another one who really doesn't have much interest in playing around creating outfits from the clothes in my closet. But IK's remark about the fantasy being more fun than the reality strikes a chord with me.

As you mention, it may not be about the clothes as much as it is about using fashion as a creative outlet. Is it harmful or unproductive? I guess if it takes over your life, or if you start acting on the fantasy by actually purchasing things you don't need, it could be a problem. Otherwise, why not see it as an opportunity for creative expression that does not require that you act on every desire. My way of channeling this creative expression is to limit my purchases to the "perfect" item, or to try to transform an older or unusable garment into something wearable (or at least useable) by using my sewing/crafting skills. If it doesn't work out, not much is lost, but, if it works, I feel quite triumphant.

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

I sympathize. I do think I enjoy thrifting more than dressing - it is all thrill of the hunt for me and a bit of fantasy and anthropology for extra fun. I do enjoy going through my closet and getting rid of stuff though - it is sort of reverse shopping! And in doing so I do end up trying on new things or combinations. Maybe that would work for you.

April

Veteran

Jayne, I can completely relate. I don't really like trying on clothes (except for the trying-on that comes right before purchasing) and that is a serious deal-breaker for coming up with good outfits.

That's why I keep thinking I need a stern stylist such as our Angie to make me act as my own mannequin, in my own closet, forcing me to create great outfits in spite of my whining about the tediousness of trying on...

annagybe

(website)

Veteran

I can relate. I have a very bad habit of picturing the lifestyle that will go with said outfit. I'm all about the fantasy. Wearing X outfit to Y restaurant. My work schedule limits my social life so I don't have a ton of places to wear things. And since I wear scrubs to work, I really shouldn't need a lot of of off time clothes. Even though I do things like go to opera regularly, and meet with with friends. I'm sure no one would be offended if I repeated an outfit, but I always want something new and different.

Isabel

Veteran

I can relate too. I also agree with a "time out" of sorts where you force yourself to wear what you have. I just got an iPhone and want to try the apps for creating wardrobes. I also like to grab and go.

Anonymous

I think I can relate. Once I have everything laundered and pressed and neatly organized, I'm loathe to mess it up by trying things on. BUT, once I get going, I have a terrific time and totally trash my bedroom. I always come up with some new combinations and I'm happy and tired when it's all over. Sometimes you just have to get started. Maybe set aside one evening a week for this homework assignment?

jayne

Veteran

oh you are all so wonderful and some great ideas.....

I feel a little less alone since IK, Isabel, Annegybe, April, Shevia and Gaylene seem to be i the same boat as hunters!

So the good tips summed up from all of you:

Set a time limit to random shopping time (thus I get to do it, not go cold turkey but limit how much time I spend on it)

Use a valet/dummy to dress instead of myself (seeing how I agree with Claire, MO and Kim that dressing me tends to get boring quickly but a dummy would be more fun)

and finally, find a reward system for spending time in the closet. YLF is a reward in one way as you all give great comments on outfits, and JR has a great one for her weight loss. Hmmm, gonna have to figure out what I can reward myself with to actually play in my closet like AG and KL suggest. I guess playing dress up is a reward in itself to some people...but I don't think that ever appealed to me when I was a kid.

WHen I browsed Netaporter last night after Annagybe's acne coat post, I noted that I loved certain pieces here and there...things I found lovely. But being able to make an outfit from random pieces that may or may not go together is probably not easy. Shopping without styling (even in my head) has led to a closet full of beautiful random pieces. Now I have been purging and thinking and really trying since January and I think I have a better plan now, and have more matching things in my closet, but I miss that random buying I did before. Maybe I am going through withdrawal? Anyway, that was the trigger for this post. Just realizing the part that made me feel good was the getting to own something and not necessarily the wearing of it. So I am not sure I have anything that I love to "wear" in my closet, like KL suggests.

I have some great suggestions to use though! thanks