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conflicting style personas?

Mochi

Veteran

It seems that currently some of us here are fumbling to figure out who we are/want to be stylistically. I accept that it's not always going to be straightforward anyway, and that we might encompass more than one. But still, as I'm spending a lot of time online right now, I'm sort of amazed at my own style schizophrenia! For example:

I'm not planning on buying either of these bags, but I experience a strong visceral attraction to them both!

2. Cydwoq "Pyramid"

1. Max Mara "Margaux" (put pics in wrong order)

So how do you create a cohesive fashion statement when you're equally smitten with Kate Spade and RATE? (Throw in some Euro Chic while you're at it.) Stick to whatever speaks slightly more strongly to you, or whichever you already currently hold more of in your wardrobe? Exploring both could mean spending that much more money, especially if you don't know what you're doing? I don't think my question is even making sense...I'm just sort of pondering how people might handle having these vague pulls in different directions, heh. And just last night I suddenly got into my head these thoughts about Argentinean tango dance style...it's already muddled enough in there!

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24 replies

Latest reply was from Jonesy

teri

Veteran

I know exactly what you are saying. I tend to do this too. Sometimes I wear outfits that don't normally "fit my current style", but am still drawn to them.

As girly as I am, I still love things with skulls on them... lol

chewyspaghetti

Veteran

I think people who have the best styles mix the things that they love (both in fashion and home decor- and I consider myself one of those). It's all about the balance, and finding things that you truly love. You may need a foundation of basic pieces with retro/vintage/girly touches (a la Kate Spade), with a RATE hair/make up routine and an overall Euro Chic style (simple high quality pieces combined in many ways). I think that is totally workable, and would look great.

modgrl

(website)

Veteran

Una found the only RATE bag that coach makes! It is possible!

Mochi

Veteran

I used to have a very boho Coach bag. Really, it was the only bag that didn't have the "COACH" logo screaming all over it, and it was beautiful (my first $$$$ bag, actually.) I would love to see Una's bag, too!

ironkurtin

Veteran

Sing it, sister! I've given up on being "cohesive" by anyone else's definition, and just find the shapes that work for me. Typically it's the 3/4 formula in some permuation and the rest is fungible.

Parsley

Veteran

Mochi, I can really relate to what you're saying. I find myself liking all sorts of divergent styles, too, and it is confusing.

I was just reading The Lucky Guide to Mastering any Style, that people here recommended, and it's interesting to see that there's a lot of overlap in pieces from one look to another, but it's more how you put the pieces together that expresses your individual style.

So my take, although I'm no expert, is that you can make an overall style statement and still have divergent pieces for "spice".

Nice bags, BTW!

Mo

(website)

Veteran

I'm no expert, but when I skim read Style Statement a main theme was that you are 80% of one term with an underlying 20% quality as well. For instance, I like fitted cropped jackets and hardware details, but I also like flowy skirts and ruffles and pink. I could never pin down my Style Statement but I knew for sure my 20% was sensual - the feel of fabrics, the feminine touches, the subtly 'sexy' vibe. The main 80% word is still out of my grasp but I tossed around architectural, structured, streamlined, ordered, etc. Their point is that you have a bit of a dichotomy in expressing yourself.

EDIT: you might find this link fun to see how others expressed their sometimes conflicting styles http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....l-me-yours

Anonymous

Parsely, I recently read the Lucky guide too, and was lusting after the classic brown croc handbag in the American Classic section. Then I read Parisian Chic and Ines says to "sell your croccodile handbag on Ebay" LOL!

Ok, sorry Mochi, we now return you to your regularly scheduled program....I totally know what you mean! A handbag is a huge part of your style statement. I am dressing in pretty classic basics, so whichever one I buy will have the opportunity to really cement my style , take it off in a horribly wrong direction, or be safely meh. I LOVE a ladylike, structured handbag in a photograph and I'm drawn to purchase them. I'm not so thrilled with them when I put one on my shoulder and look in the mirror. I've carried them on my wrist and my look gets really prissy. OTH, a hobo bag sitting on a table does nothing for me. But when I put it on I love the way it drapes agains my body and how it dresses down my outfit and relaxes my up-tight style.

Have you gone to a big department store with your favorite outfit on (and your new coat) and "tried on" different types of bags the way *you* like to carry them? I think every store needs a full length mirror in the handbag department! If you take some pics and post them, maybe we could help you decide on a general style. Hmmmm. I need to do that too!

JennyAnne

(website)

Veteran

I'm in that boat of not knowing what I want to look like, but I'm not too concerned about it as long as I'm comfy and confident. But, it would be nice to know the common threads in my style to narrow down the shopping and avoid all the returns.

Amy

(website)

Veteran

Mochi, I can relate. One of the words I was worried about coming up in my exploration of a style persona was "eclectic." In fact, I'd be surprised if most of us weren't eclectic in one way or another. There's such great variety out there, it's hard not to be swayed by the best versions of different styles we see.

Perhaps that's why a clear style persona is so powerful. It stands out from the usual mish-mash of things we see. I'm not sure singling one style out over others is better though...it's just dramatic.

rae

(website)

Veteran

Mochi, it is these "conflicting" elements that bring interesting counterpoints into your outfits and really make the style YOURS. I've been more and more drawn to structured, pristine, bright, shiny bags lately, too - they really POP against a moody, distressed backdrop. Even I would not be happy wearing head-to-toe Allsaints, for example (I like brights, collared shirts, defining my waist), but I don't think that interferes with my UWP/Utilitarian Fashionista fashion persona.

rae

(website)

Veteran

Now that I think of it, those conflicts are kind of built in to my style statements. "Warrior" vs. "Princess" - neither 100% shaggy Viking nor 100% luxurious noblewoman.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Mixing up different style personas IS A STYLE. It's the contrasting juxtaposition that makes the statement. Whether it is a cohesive statement is about fine tuning the details.

goldenpig

(website)

Veteran

Well, even though I figured out what my style persona is, I still like to try new looks. That's what fashion is all about--it's a dynamic process. You don't want to get stuck with one look for the rest of your life. I see different styles and I really like them and want to try them out. Sometimes it works, like when I tried Parisian Chic:
http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....ic-my-take
and RATE (I had to LOL at what you said in your OP, this actually was my attempt to RATE Kate Spade!)
http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....le-attempt
and sometimes it doesn't (I still am having trouble cracking the UWP nut, with laughable results--see my internal commentary at the end of the thread):
http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....laid-pants
but no matter what, I am having fun trying it out!

I know what you mean, I am very impressionable and whenever I see a cool look on someone else, I always want to try it. But that's OK because I still know what my main style persona is and I mostly stick to it. In my Euro Chic attempt, Claire jokingly said that I am not "allowed" to have two different style personas. But Rae pointed out that my take on Parisian Chic was still very me, with the fitted waist and bright colors, unlike the looser fit and neutral colors typical of that style. And even my attempt at RATE was still pretty polished and not truly RATE, according to Angie. So even when you try a style element that's very different from your typical persona, you can still incorporate it into your style--filter it through your style lens. It's fun to have some dramatic tension from the juxtaposition of different styles...more fun (and less costumey, especially if you're into retro styles) than dressing head to toe in one particular look.

I absolutely think you can pull off various styles and make them your own. I think you should try the mod look if you like it! I really enjoy your WIW's and look forward to seeing you develop your style persona further!

MsMary

Veteran

I have no particular need for my style to be "coherent." I've long applied the "If you love it all, it will all play nicely together" philosophy to home decor, with good results, and I think the same applies to fashion.

I love both of the bags you've showed us, and I might carry the more structured one with a more casual outfit, and the more RATE one with one of my pencil skirts and blazers office ensembles, just to keep people guessing!

Amy

(website)

Veteran

MaryK, I think you have a special talent for making things work together. What I've had happen, though, is I buy a special piece I like that's a little different than my wardrobe norm and it doesn't end up working with anything else. I either end up going on a shopping spree to make that piece work or end up donating it to charity.

Theoretically, at least, a style statement is supposed to help us shop a little more wisely, so that each item plays nicely with other things in our wardrobe.

MsMary

Veteran

That's a good point, Amy. I will say that although I don't consciously limit myself to items in a certain style, I don't buy ANYTHING unless I think it will play nicely with items I already have. And given that I have about a million solid-color pieces (cardi's, blazers, pants, pencil skirts), almost anything is likely to play nicely with some of them!

RoseandJoan

Veteran

Mochi, if you are going to put yourself into a box it is best to have it custom made to suit your every need. Contradictions are what makes style such fun!

shipskitty

Veteran

LOL Amy I was reading your comments and had to laugh when you said you didn't want "eclectic" to be part of the description of your style - I think it was one of the first words I was sure really belonged in my style description.

But to me it means "unexpected interesting details".

I'm trying to reconcile some creativity, some RATE, some classic shapes and a lot of texture... I'm initally drawn to handbags with structure in neutral colours but feel both bored and boring with them as part of my look if they don't have a lot of texture and/or a bit of something unusual about them. Too much structure feels wrong though too. And I would love to bring more colour into my look but finding all of those things together...*sigh*

citygirldc

(website)

Veteran

I just like outfits that have different and unusual pieces/accessories or articles of clothing that stand out in some way, for example: a statement necklace, or cools shoes, or dark eye makeup, or red lips, or an awesome dress.

I like too many different styles to be put in a box.

I look it it this way: If it looks good on you and makes you feel good, then that's your style no matter what.

Jewell

Veteran

I wonder if many of us have a primary style persona as well as a secondary one?

In my struggles to identify my home decorating style I realized that while my eye can certainly appreciate almost any style, for my own home I am drawn to more traditional pieces. Still I use a lot of modern elements as well. Those sound like they would be conflicting styles, but they work well together.

Maybe you have a primary style persona and a somewhat conflicting secondary style persona that's less evident in your wardrobe.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

I, too, am drawn to items that fall into many different style categories. I think the trick to creating a coherent look is to find some common element—it might be colour or shape, for example—that will draw the disparate elements together. That's why it's important also to have some very neutral basic pieces, and also some patterns in your wardrobe. They can unify like nothing else, making those gamine shoes work with that RATE belt and the retro jacket.

catgirl

Veteran

Mochi, you have described my style dilemma to a T! What has helped me is figuring out what looks good on me - that allowed me to eliminate a lot of items I love that don't "really" fit my style or my body (wrap dresses!). For me the conflicts stems from two situations: my RATE personality at war with my Indian/colorful/magpie side; and my relatively uptight profession vs. my own style preferences and ultra-casual personal life. Not easy to mesh or sort out!

Instead of trying to fit yourself into an already existing box, try building your own box... that's kind of what I ended up doing (and am still in the process of building).

My Coach bag is the best - it was a limited edition of the bag Karla from karlascloset designed for them. You can see it here (looks like they still make it!). I don't normally splurge on bags but this one absolutely seized me and it has been my staple bag since I got it.

http://www.coach.com/online/ha.....irectorCmd

Jonesy

Veteran

So much wisdom on this thread! I don't have a lot to add....I guess I don't think a style persona is mandatory. It can be useful, and fun, but you don't have to be guided by one. I agree with many other posters who talk about putting different, eclectic, juxtaposing elements together in unique ways--this is what is distinctive and creates a personal style, IMHO. Add in lots of attention to fit, quality whenever possible, keeping up with trends that work well with your bod and what you like, and you are good to go :)!