"Comfortably dressy": something to aspire to? - YouLookFab Forum

Category

Inspiration

Welcome! Read about what to wear and how to wear it on the YLF Blog. Join the YLF Forum to ask specific questions or just chat about fashion and personal style. Or check out the curated list of things we love in YLF Finds.

Outfits Ensembles Trends Advice

"Comfortably dressy": something to aspire to?

Mander

(website)

Veteran

The blog Small Notebook has a series of posts about paring down a wardrobe, and while this concept was not the focus of this post I found the idea of being "comfortably dressy" rather appealing. I suppose it is a lot like Angie's MOTG, but somehow the notion gels better with me.

Perhaps this is a good thing for me to aspire to! Most of the time I just feel schlumpy and not fit for public viewing, and although I have been working on upgrading my schlepping-at-home style in the last few months I still seem to be frequently paralyzed when getting dressed to go out of the house. Aiming for "comfortably dressy" in most situations would be much more manageable and might help me get over my mental block about "nice" vs "everyday" clothes.

17 replies

Latest reply was from rosee

bj1111

Veteran

this is a great way to get over the mental block of segregating clothes into "too nice" and "not nice enough".

perhaps you could practice being comfortably dressy at home so getting dressed for going out is less of a stumbling block?

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Because I work at home, I do what BJ suggests. I dress comfortably dressy at home as well as going out! I admit, the comfort factor is more important for purely home days vs. days when I am also out and about. So I will wear my baggy jeans at home and may or may not wear them going out. I will wear knit tops at home (in winter) but may change to a button down going out.

Kim

Veteran

I run an all-toddler home childcare so I aim for comfort first, then a bit dressy next. I do NOT wear gear at home (unless I'm on my way to the gym), I think it's just a slippery slope for me and an easy way to let my hips and waist expand! (Elastic waists on gear lie to me about my current weight...LOL)

Today I'm wearing (as I type) an pair of eggplant colored slim fitting denim, a breton striped knit top and a long polka dot scarf in the same colors as the top. I'm pattern mixing. The daycare kids could care less but I feel better about myself when my hair and makeup are done, and I'm comfortably dressed for the day. I kind of think "Well, anything could happen now and I'd be ready to go for it at a moment\s notice!" Always the optimist I guess! LOL

Anonymous

I love this phrase and lately have been feeling that comfort is of very high priority to me, more so in how clothes actually feel to move in as well as stylewise. I too work from home and I think this should be something to aim for. Kim, I agree about elastic waists and expansion of girth so maybe not too much comfort!

Sara L.

Veteran

I think this is a good phrase to strive for in my casual style. Comfortable is important but still dressy enough to feel good about myself.

rachylou

Veteran

I really love this idea too. I think it would be perfect for my modern office environment, self-described as "casually intense." It's an odd place to think about. You don't have to wear a navy suit here, but you do sorta have to be stiff and formal.

Beth Ann

Veteran

Mander: What about trying some of Angie's "capsule" ideas? I also like the idea of incorporating more "comfortably dressy" items in your days at home. I'm at home today, and I met a friend for coffee. I'm wearing this:

I take pictures daily, which the family thinks is a little weird, but they're getting used to it. The pictures help me make choices in a hurry and remember favorite combinations. I actually look at my YLF photo album in iPhoto, rather than stare at my closet. Then, every few weeks I spend an hour or two in my closet, tidying and trying new combinations. Need to do this again! My t-shirts are spilling all over the shelf!

This post has 1 photo. Photos uploaded by this member are only visible to other logged in members.

If you aren't a member, but would like to participate, please consider signing up. It only takes a minute and we'd love to have you.

lyn*

(website)

Veteran

I think I aspire to be "comfortably dressy" too, even though I have to work outside of my home, I feel I can wear a lot of my outfits to lunches and the occasional dinner - while still being able to sleep in my outfits!

Anonymous

Who wants to be dressy and uncomfortable? Lol

This makes me think of the 'chic' definition Angie was looking for

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Beth Ann - LOVE what you are wearing today. You look spectacular in that!! That's the epitome of the idea, to me. Gorgeous.

carolbee

Veteran

This sounds like a great concept for me. I'm retired but go out a number of times during the week for various activities. These are all casual but I do not want to wear the same things that I wear "around the house". So aiming for comfortably dressy means my at home wear would be upped a notch and I can just check my grooming and head out the door.

Diana

Veteran

Yesterday, I wore my first wide-leg trousers in years. It felt like I was wearing pajama pants! So I think that qualifies as comfortable dressy! I feel like this in soft silk blouses, too.

Caro in Oz

Veteran

Interesting - I think I do this already. I wear the same things around the house that I wear out. I feel that if I had separate round the house clothes I would stay in them all day & they would start to get sloppy. I do have comfy items for the end of the day - when I know I'm not going out again but these are more like pjs.

ManidipaM

Veteran

Great post! Thanks for sharing it. This is the same idea that struck me last year, Mander, as I struggled to lift myself out of blah-dom in my at-home outfits.

Resorting to relaxed, pilling loungewear or shirts and stretched-out T-shirts 'demoted' for household chores was fine to do---when I went out to an office job each day and dressed up for it, then returned home to actually mostly just lounge and do the chores in the evenings and weekends! But once I started working from home, it turned into a terrible trap. My favourite 'good clothes' languished while I felt shamefully shabby much to often. And it seemed silly to dress up just to go to the corner shop, the newspaper stand, to take out the trash or pick up the mail... you get the drift. A no-win situation.

I think it is all too easy for us to associate home with a certain relaxing of standards as well as comfort. It is not as easy these days---with the era of grand old houses where people dressed up for afternoon visitors and changed for dinner long past---to associate 'dressy' with 'at home' any longer. 'Daily dressy' has, for the most part, moved to the realm of the business district for very many of us. And yet, the wheel is coming full circle, with technology enabling more and more people to work and study and entertain themselves without stepping out the door. Which means, 'dressy' needs to come home to roost --- without fighting a territorial battle with 'comfort'.

We'll make peace between them yet, I hope, and soon --- both of us!

For me, it's been an inspiration to watch Suz get them sorted out in style, because she's expressed similar discomfort in the past.

It's also helped to actually reorganize my closet to demolish the segregation that BJ talks of. Maybe TMI, but putting the loungewear and faded flowers into a separate bin or basket, tucked out of the way, means I'm confronted with only my 'real clothes' the moment I open the dresser or armoire to find fresh undies --- and it's actually easier to just dress in them now than to go traipsing off in another direction to pull out a set of shabbies.

moira

Veteran

I think if you don't say, "Oh crap, someone is at the door, maybe I won't answer it", you are probably doing just fine.

Freckles

Veteran

Yes and no...

My new this season black cashmere/wool sweater toggle coat is being worn at least a part of every day and probably won't make the cut to out of the house clothes by next year. It was too expensive to last only one season so I do save some things for going out and not wear them at home, although not this sweater coat as it is perfection being warm and cozy.

After I realized this about the sweater coat I quit wearing my new cashmere turtles for only at home wear. There hasn't been a problem with them at all but I want to make sure of that. If I'm going somewhere, maybe just chalk talks, I will put it on in the morning but cover it with my fleece blazer that I was going to get rid of but now use as an apron. You take your apron off when you answer the door don't you? Okay, maybe not but yes I do when I actually go out of the house...

rosee

Veteran

I have been following Rachel Meek's blog for some time now and I love her philosophy. The "comfortably dressy" style really resonates with me too and it's something I have been trying to achieve for the past couple of years or so. There seems to be a dichotomy in North America sometimes where we dress to the nines or we schlump around - it's only now that we are seeing more people move to prominent attention who fit in between these 2 extremes, "comfortably dressy". Meek's time in Europe likely had a big impact on how she dresses now in the US and I'm glad she and people like Angie are bringing this style to the forefront more. You can be polished and completely comfortable.

My own version includes dark denim, trousers with some stretch, washable knit tops that look more blousey than like t-shirts, cardigans and fitted jackets with some give. Light on the accessories, though I do like using colorful scarves.
And good shoes and boots (because for me it always comes down to good shoes or boots).

http://smallnotebook.org/2011/.....ly-dressy/
http://smallnotebook.org/2011/.....ssy-style/