Comfortable Shoes - HELP! - YouLookFab Forum

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Comfortable Shoes - HELP!

Echo

Veteran

I need to preface this by saying it seems a really stupid question. Yet, I seem incapable of buying truly comfortable shoes. Whenever something feels like a dream in the store - often even if I walk up and down the aisle with both shoes on - it never ends up that way at home. In the rare event that a shoe fits well and gets a lot of wear, it does NOT seem to properly fit after it has been put away for the winter (or summer or whatever season) and I take it out again. My weight, though higher than I'd like, has not been dramatically changing, so that should not change the fit.

It just makes me second-guess every pair of shoes I buy. I bought a pair of shoes last weekend at DSW. I had been out shopping for the day, and it was warm so I figured my feet would be at their most sensitive/largest. I brought them home and when I went to put them on Monday morning, they seemed constricting, pinchy and they rubbed at the heel. I took them off even before I left for work, and I will return them this weekend (never worn outside the house). But how discouraging! Even my favorite Birks - the ones I wore all last summer - are rubbing and uncomfortable. I'm at my wit's end, as I seem incapable of finding truly comfortable shoes and sandals.

Any suggestions?

Shopping

23 replies

Latest reply was from Beth Ann

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Shoes are sooo tricky with fussy feet. I GET IT. You have my empathy.

Echo, if I remember correctly, you have wider feet. Perhaps you need a wide size? I can make suggestions depending on your requirements.

Style Fan

Veteran

I feel your pain. I have so many problems buying shoes. I haven't had the problem you describe but I do switch my shoes daily. A podiatrist (foot doctor) recommended this. Mr. SF does this as well. It does help.
I wear Birks (not Gizeh because they hurt my feet), El Naturalista, and Trippen. All expensive ones of course.
I don't have wide feet. Just normal feet. (well normal size)

Echo

Veteran

Angie, my feet are definitely wider, especially in the front. Sometimes wide sizes seem too big/roomy, while other times they work well. I almost always size down a half to a full size when buying wide shoes, as they seem to run bigger overall.

I don't like to wear sneaks to work, though it sometimes seems that a pair of black Skecher Go-Walks is the only pair I have that is comfortable enough to go all day. But I feel frumpy and old when I wear them to work because they were purchased as gear (and I find them rather ugly). Birkenstocks normally work well, but as I said, the Birks I wore last summer now rub and are not all-day shoes. I have been trying to wear them for shorter periods in the hopes that they will be as comfortable as they once were.

Though I need enclosed shoes for winter, I am seeking comfortable sandals or flats now for spring and summer. I ordered a pair of Melissa flats, and while they seem like they would be great in the proper size, they are just too snug, and I fear the next size would be too big, so I might have to return them completely.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

How frustrating for you, Echo.

Have you been to a really good shoe store or shoe department for a fitting? It may be that the size you once wore is no longer right for you.

I've also heard that we lose some of the padding on our feet as we age so we can feel the pain in our feet more often. I wonder if this is part of what is going on.

I think it's pretty common to feel odd in a pair of shoes that you haven't worn for a while, even if they work for you. Our feet need to adjust just like our eyes!

I agree that shoes are awfully tricky. I am pretty much used to getting blisters my first few times out in a shoe -- even my very best ones. And that is despite using body glide (which does help -- quite a lot!) and sometimes even placing a bandaid or moleskin on the place where I expect to get some rubbing. Booties are better because I usually have socks on with those, so less rubbing. But due to my narrow heel, almost everything slips, even sandals with straps. I think I've only had one or two experiences where this did not happen.

Echo

Veteran

Maybe you are right, Suz, and I need to just tough it out for the first few wears. I am just so much less tolerant of that process than I was years ago. When I wear a pair of shoes and they hurt, I am loathe to ever put them on again. So if I buy shoes that just "need a little breaking in" (that's what I tell myself when I buy them), I sometimes wear them once and never want to touch them again!

always trying

Veteran

After the third big purge, i finally have a closet full of shoes that do not hurt, and for the most part stay on my feet. I do have a pair of slip on sneakers that are getting stretched out and may be slipping soon. In trying to find suitable dressy shoes for a formal event I ordered and returned 4 pairs before finding ones to keep. I feel your pain and frustrations. I just took a very nice pair of closed toe sandals to my fav charity donation yesterday because they felt fine last summer, but tried them this year and the buckles rubbed. My shoes are all various brands and price ranges. Some, what you all on here would shun because they are cheap, are among my most comfy. Some purged were among the most expensive. So hard to know and buy shoes these days!!

DonnaF

Veteran

Yeah, I have my 2, 4, 6, and 8 hour footwear. Also, the best ones for standing are not necessarily the best ones for walking, and vice versa. My low volume unpadded feet are wide in the front and narrow at the back with super tiny heels. I get my best fit in laced or heavily buckled footwear combined with heel cups and or Superfeet or other inserts. I also wear foam or silicone bunion pads and try not to wear the same shoes two days in a row. Even my gear running, walking, and hiking shoes that I wear with the thickest Thorlo socks tend to bother me with enough walking and hours in them, but they are probably the best and least pinchy of the lot.

I'm also wondering if feet have different needs throughout the day. At times, my feet want a lot of support. At others, they just want to be fairly unencumbered.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Echo, have you tried this Sofft sandal? It comes in multiple colours, by the way, and also in wide widths. It is the cousin of the pewter Breeze and Bernia sandals of a few years ago.

This is one of the few shoes that has worked for me out of the box, blister free. The patent version might cause a blister -- I have only worn it for a very short period indoors so I am not sure yet. But I wore the Bernias and the Breeze for hours on the first day with nary a problem, and I suspect the suede version of this sandal would be even more comfortable.

I love that it can be dressed up or down.

I agree that there is a fine line that we need to identify between the shoe that really will be comfortable after wearing it in the house a couple of times, and the one that is never really going to work, no matter what. And sometimes in the store it's just not possible to guess. I have made mistakes, too. I let go of a pair of fairly useful Sam Edelman wedges this year because of that problem. When I bought them they seemed as if they'd stretch out and his other shoes usually fit well -- but they never did end up feeling good on my foot and life is too short for shoes that hurt!!!

Söfft 'Innis' Low Wedge Sandal (Women)

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rabbit

Veteran

I change shoes during the day a lot. I wear my most orthopedic slip-ons at home to give my out and about feet a rest too. I also take rest days between wearing the same shoes (also so they fully dry out). I think also that spring feet that are sensitive on the surface of the skin sometimes haven't yet toughened to get used to the feeling of sandal straps and socklessness, where with warm weather and some gradual introduction they get used to it again. When I buy new shoes I wear them in the house at least three different days for about an hour each time to make sure they are going to be fine. But I've had the experience where when something about a shoe initially bugged me a little at first (like heel height or stiffness), it soon became normalized as long as I wasn't walking for many hours and spent time working out the ideal sock and insole combo for it.

Then again there are certain parts of my feet where friction just never gets better so I try to avoid those shoes completely. Sympathizing with your struggle.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

That's it, exactly, rabbit!! Spring feet are extra sensitive.

Anonymous

Oh, Echo, how frustrating. Sore and blistered feet are the worst. I don't have particularly fussy feet, but have still I've had enough shoe comfort fails that now I only shop at Nordstrom so I can return shoes that develop problems. I also spend disproportionally more of my clothing budget on shoes because I have knee issues and have a family history of foot problems. Some of the brands I've found most comfortable for me are AGL, Paul Green (though not much footbed padding), Taryn Rose, Born and Dansko. I am loving the comfort of these AGL sandals, they are super soft leather and were perfect right out the box, but they are very spendy (for me anyway, though if I add up all my shoe warehouse fails I could have bought them a few times over).

ETA: I agree with Suz and Rabbit, many of my shoes need to be rebroken in, each season, and sandals are particularly tricky.

AGL ATTILIO GIUSTI LEOMBRUNI 'City' Block Heel Sandal (Women)

$355.00 $177.49

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Word Lily

Veteran

I have been on a (multi-year, at this point) quest for shoes that fit and feel comfortable. I think I'm finally getting there ...

I've worn a 9 (maybe a 9.5 occasionally), average width. And I've always spent money on shoes. But it wasn't until last summer that someone told me my feet are quite wide. As in, D. As in, maybe buy from the men's department, because even in the equivalent size, the men's shoe will be wider, and that smidge extra room will make a difference. Some brands/styles aren't wide enough even then. (And yet, the wide of some women's shoes I literally can fall out of. It depends how they're shaped.)

I also learned, through this process, that I wasn't wearing the right length shoe; I need a women's 10.5-11 (men's 8.5-9), all in a D width. I now have 2 pairs of shoes that fit me and another on order that hopefully will.

So. I guess all that to say ... I feel your pain. And are you sure you're wearing the right size?

Anonymous

Echo -- I came to learn that I have wide feet. Over the course of one single year, I got rid of all my "regular" shoes and started buying wide widths. It made all the difference in the world.

bj1111

Veteran

Wearing socks all winter make my feet tender and soft. I have to "build up" some toughness after switching to sandals--eg between my toes even for flip flops.

Have you tried moleskin or that rub that Angie recommends to prevent blisters? They've been successful bridges until my feet get used to socklessness.

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

I never really know if a shoe is comfortable from just trying it on. (Uncomfortable asserts itself right away.) If a pair seems to fare pretty well after the first day except for some exact points, foot petals pressure pointz can sometimes solve the problem.

RobinF

Veteran

That must be discouraging! I find that my feet are often larger and more puffy in the morning than they are later, maybe that is happening to you?

Echo

Veteran

RobinF, I hadn't thought of that. I actually assumed just the opposite would be true, and that feet would be more swollen in the afternoon after standing/walking all day. Then again, my fingers are sometimes puffy in the morning, so I don't know why I assumed my feet could not be.

Ledonna N.

Veteran

Whew like other Fam. I can understand. Wide fussy flat large feet. Thanks dad. Suze 11 w. I would recommend a podetrist maybe you'll get inserts like me. I try on all shoes at 5he end of the day when my foot swells. To get a true gage if how my shoes fit and feel. If I can stay home I wear the at home for the day instead of outside. If they need to be returned then they have no outside ware.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

I echo what Suz, bj111 and rabbit said, wholeheartedly.

As for sandals, try these in various widths. You will need to do a lot of experimentation with sizes and styles. It's the only way to take care of fussy feet. But the upfront work is worth it.

Naturalizer Lanna

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Munro 'Kirsten' Slingback Sandal (Women)

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6

Dansko 'Dominique' T-Strap Sandal (Women)

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5

Ecco Flash T-Strap Sandal II

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Ecco Flash T-Strap Sandal

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Söfft 'Innis' Low Wedge Sandal (Women)

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6

'Cayanne' Leather Peep Toe Sandal (Women)

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Open Toe Leather Sandal (Women)

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'Cookie' Slingback Sandal (Women)

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2

'Mirabelle' Sport Sandal (Women)

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15

AGL ATTILIO GIUSTI LEOMBRUNI 'City' Block Heel Sandal (Women)

$355.00 $177.49

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Vince Camuto 'Lavette' Perforated Peep Toe Bootie (Women)

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Echo

Veteran

Thank you so much for the recommendations, Angie. I went out today and stopped at a store to try on some shoes. I thought some of the Naturalizer heeled sandals would be nice, given that they are offered in wide widths. But at the store, every shoe in a box marked wide had an N5 marking on the sole (which is supposed to indicate a more comfortable sole and not a width)... and I could not get my feet into them. They felt narrow and not wide, so I have to wonder if they were mismarked or if my feet are ridiculously wide (which would seem unlikely given that I have mostly worn regular shoes forever, even if a wide might fit better). The Aerosole shoes in the same store marked wide actually felt wide. Sadly, despite trying on many pairs, I came home empty handed. I will look up the sandals you recommended tonight, Angie, and order some. I am to the point where I have virtually nothing to wear for the weather that is comfortable, so I have to find something soon!

Joy

Veteran

I sympathize. I no longer keep any shoe that is not comfortable right out of the box. With diabetic feet, I don't feel it is wise to try to break them in if some Body Glide does not work. I found that I need to spend more for shoes to get the fit I want. Feet do change with age and weight, at least mine have.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

I agree with Angie that trying a lot on of different styles, sizes, and widths from different brands and comparing is a fantastic revelation. I fit a EU 37 best, almost always. But occasionally an EU 37 will be a touch too short. Some US 6.5s are perfect, but if I am going to be wearing a sock, especially a thicker one, or if my feet are likely to swell (as in sandals) I typically need a 7 in a US size. And if I do need a 7, sometimes I will need a narrow width. On the other hand, even some 7s will be too narrow in mediucm. UK sizes almost never fit me properly. And so on.

Beth Ann

Veteran

I'm having a bit of foot trouble at the moment, so I'm having to reconfigure my summer shoe plans. I have a widish foot, and a fairly high volume one, too.

I'd like to second bodyglide, particularly at the start of the season, and I wonder if your feet are literally in need of a little TLC. It takes a bit of time, but I find an Epsom salt soak, followed by a pumice stone and a massage with a great foot moisturizer or straight up petroleum jelly might help your feet feel better. At least it's cheap!

I just dropped some serious money on a pair of Danskos. I adored the way the fit my foot. Might be worth a look!