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Building a new wardrobe and creating a style statement

Lynette

Hello Fabers,
I am soon going to be building a new wardrobe almost from scratch and as the first step I thought I would create a style moniker and style statement like many of you have. I have looked at many of your profiles to help gain some inspiration. I also made a list of things I love and of words that describe my style. I certainly don't have the wardrobe to back it up yet. But it is what I would like to aspire to. With that said I am considering something like "Modern Classic Pretty"or "Classic Pretty with a Twist" as my style moniker. And for my fashion statement: I want my style to be polished, put together, updated classic, pretty, unique, crisp, simple, and ladylike, with a dash of elegance and a dash of retro.

My husband and I have been traveling for a year on what we are calling a gap year. When we were putting our things into storage I took the opportunity to sort through my wardrobe and get rid of everything that didn't fit, had gone out of style, was a mistake in the first place, etc.

I have a very small wardrobe; actually what some would call a non-existent wardrobe. This is due to several factors. First of all I am extremely short waisted and have a short torso but long legs. I am pear shaped and have large thighs in comparison to my very skinny legs. NOTHING ever fits me correctly! I will try on 50 things with no success and then get discouraged and go home with nothing. I do not buy clothes that spark joy (Angie's phrase!) I buy clothes to "make do." I have not had much success with alterations except for the few times I have had it done at Nordstrom. Admittedly I haven't often wanted to spend money altering an item I don't really love in the first place. Secondly, I am very very frugal. Not spending money is a better feeling for me than having something new. I only buy on sale. This decreases my ability to find the right clothing and also decreases the color selection. So generally I buy clothing that I can make do with when I desperately need something and then wear that item to death. And then I start the whole cycle over again. I am the woman out desperately shopping the day before a special event because I have nothing to wear. This has made shopping and building a wardrobe quite a depressing activity. It is so sad because I love fashion! YLF has been such a joy to me for several years now and I have learned SO MUCH from all of you! We are returning to the US next week and I am excited to start my new style journey with the help of YLF!

Thanks for reading this very long post! Any feedback you would care to give will be much appreciated!

Dressing

20 replies

Latest reply was from Lynette

LaPed

Veteran

Hi Lynette! Welcome to YLF! I've spent the past several years doing a major wardrobe rebuild, so I know exactly how you feel.

I'm a pretty thrifty person, but I can also be impatient, so the biggest challenge for me has been learning how to do a slow build, adding only things that are just-right (using Angie's PPP formula -- Picky, Practical, Patient). I used to shop sales, clearance, and secondhand almost exclusively, which resulted in a hodgepodge wardrobe rather than cohesive capsules. I've adjusted my shopping approach somewhat, after paying attention to how others here on YLF plan and shop for their wardrobes.

My advice re: sales shopping -- don't worry too much about paying full-price for the right item. Price: quality ratio is a crapshoot these days, and paying full-price for something well-made, and then getting to enjoy it all season and for years to come, is a better investment than paying half-price for something that will fall apart next month, or something bought at a seasonal clearance that you won't even wear 'til next year and might not even like by then! Learn to assess quality (lots of threads on here about this), and set a maximum price you're willing to spend (could be either per-item, or an annual budget). Then shop for the best you can afford within that budget. I still take advantage of promotions, referral credits, etc, but I don't buy something just because it's on sale, or just because it's the cheapest option I can find.

A lot of folks here have annual or seasonal budgets, some practice one-in-one-out to keep a manageable wardrobe size and restrain spending, some people track wears and cost-per-wear, and some do variations on the French Five method, setting a limit on the number of pieces purchased each season or year. So you'll find lots of strategies here, and discussion of budgeting methods, for those of us with the spendthrift gene.

Last thought -- your descriptors sound like a great starting point. Pics will help you hone in on your style, and help you figure out if your look is meshing with the image or persona you have in mind. If you're not ready/comfortable posting selfies, then at the very least some Pinterest ensembles or other inspiration photos can be useful for brainstorming. Cheers!

unfrumped

Veteran

Welcome! You will find a lot of great help here for your journey.

I sympathize with hard to fit. Things are too short, no sleeves, I’m loooong- waisted as opposed to short, waists are gappy. It’s always something !

Here are a few questions: have you ever had SOME success with particular styles or brands? Do you only “ look” at sale items or have you gone out and allowed yourself to try on full- price or more expensive items, just to see what’s out there? Have you tried something on and loved it except for the price?
One thing that helped me was to learn to recognize “ aha” , good fit and flattering proportions of an item. So then I knew these existed— it’s not me/ you, it’s the clothes that have the problem!
This helps set the bar for what I should keep looking for and get instead of “ meh” items. They don’t have to be expensive, but they might not be “ on sale” or might sell out.
I’m not promoting spending above your means, but thinking of value for your $$.
You sound like you already are adapted to a small wardrobe, so if you targeted your best items, fewer but better, you may not spend even as much as someone who buys a lot of random things on sale. You will still need your budget plan, but may need to spend more per item and/or budget for selected alterations and carefully add better- fitting items. You have to believe you are worth it!
You first may want to get some more feedback on your style goals and body type for brands that are more likely to makes clothes that work for you. That may help decrease the frustration level.
Then, I suggest making some time for “ retail research”, where you go to department store or mall and try on a whole array of things at different price points, possibly focused on some specific stores or brands to increase your odds, maybe even avoid the sale racks, without any plan or pressure to buy. NOT before a big event!
If you’ve been barking up the wrong trees, so to speak, you may find more things out there than you realized, at reasonable prices. Or, you may be able to target brands and watch for their sales, or, you may develop “ you know it when you see it” and need to pounce.
I have learned I need to pounce on some things called HEWI ‘s ( highly elusive wardrobe item) which for me include some types of comfortable footwear, perfectly- fitting pants, longer dresses with sleeves.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

I like MCP, Lynette. Modern Classic Pretty has a nice ring to it. And a big official welcome from me too.

First, thanks for the ongoing YLF support and kind words. It made me smile.

Second, it's time to get a wardrobe that sparks joy! If not now - WHEN? It's that simple. *smiling*.

Third, you are worth full price. It's better to have three pairs of full price jeans that fit well and make you feel fab, then six pairs of mediocre discounted jeans that simply cover your body and don't do the trick.

Fourth, I believe that you have to relax into the whole fashion and style thing. Be patient, laugh a lot, learn from your mistakes, and rock on. What you lose on the swings, you'll gain on the roundabouts at some point. LISTEN TO YOUR CURRENT FEELINGS (because they do change) - but be organized about it. The more in tune you are with your feelings and being able to translate them into wardrobe items, the easier it is to build a style that is authentic, personal, visually fabulous, physically comfortable, and manageable.

You need well chosen, versatile pieces that you can build into larger complements and capsules each season. In the end, you'll find that becoming stricter about fit and having items altered properly is worth the time and expense. Bad fit does not make you feel good about your body. It's a variable that we CAN control. Lets control it and not let it boss us around.

3style

Veteran

How about starting with some easy victories and building up your style from there? For example, I'm also short waisted. I have big shoulders. Most t-shirts and sweaters are easy for me to fit. I try to keep some basics and some more interesting pieces in these categories. It might help you to refine your style. Then if you need to alter particular basic bottoms, you will be choosing the details of the style based on going with the tops and toppers which you already know work for you.

As an aside, you might have luck with a short fit and flare dress over leggings or skinny jeans. It's one of those things where either piece alone would make you feel self-conscious about your thighs, but when combined together it can make for a fun pretty and casual style.

Lynn

Veteran

My suggestion is to focus on finding the clothing silhouettes that work best for your body shape, your style, and your clothing needs and then stick with them. In other words define 1-2 uniforms that work for you.

For example my sisters and I are all pear shaped, one of my sister extremely so. Our styles and clothing needs are different but we each have uniforms that we stick to.

Me- somewhat pear shaped, retired, casual style, can't stand to wear structured or fitted clothing, live in 4 season climate
- slim stretchy pants (no leggings) and looser fitting tops that cover my hips preferably with some waist shaping. I have found 2 brands of pants that work for me so I stick with those. I make a lot of my tops.
- In summer- dresses with empire seam or princess seamed fit and flare dresses without a waistband or waist seam.

Sister 1- very pear shaped, still working, casual style, 4 season climate, doesn't wear dresses/skirts because of "cub rub" but doesn't mind more fitted clothes
- trousers (altered or made) with tucked tops and waist length cardigans. In summer wears capri length pants

Sister 2- moderately pear shaped, tall (6ft), working, lives southern CA, likes more structured clothing
- trousers (orders tall from a couple of retailers) + fitted shirts
- dresses ordered from http://www.eshakti.com

I would also strongly second finding a good tailor. In fact if you prefer pants and require extensive alterations I would recommend finding a dressmaker who can make your pants for you- it might be cheaper in the long run after the initial fitting.

Hopes this helps in some way. Good luck!

Anonymous

Welcome, Lynette. I have almost the same style goals as you aspire to and have also had to build a new wardrobe from scratch. Be very picky and don't be afraid of buying what you love, paying full price. I have found that in the long run it saves money because a few well chosen pieces are more satisfying..
Look at what Angie buys for herself and recommends. These are often classic with a twist. Read her suggestions for your body type.

Style Fan

Veteran

Welcome Lynette. You are off to a great start with your style statement and moniker. I have found that buying good quality clothing that lasts pays off in the long run. My wardrobe is pretty small but it is finally coming together. Angie's 3 Ps (Picky, Practical, Patient) pay off.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Welcome! I can't relate to the tiny wardrobe -- mine is quite large -- but I do have very similar fit challenges to what you describe! Short torso, long legs, big hips/thighs. If you're like me, it's easier to find tops and jackets that fit straight off the rack than it is to find pants or even dresses. I have a very casual lifestyle and am self-employed in a creative field, so I don't have to worry about dressing for an office. What are your requirements for daily dressing?

For me, the easiest first step to flattery and feeling fab is to find a great-fitting pair of fairly dark, uniform wash, bootcut full-length jeans. Lucky Brand Lolita cut works really well for me. I also have some Gap bootcuts from a few years ago that do the trick. The Pilco and the Letterpress line from Anthropologie is also a great fit, and AG and Paige can work too, in certain styles.

I also agree with all the other suggestions. Let us know what it is you're dressing for, and what appeals to you. Don't be afraid to post photos -- it's really helpful to take pics and post them for feedback.

The Cat

Veteran

Interesting reading. Well-written post by you, and lots of good advice from others.

Try to find out which silhouette/shapes works for you, and which colours. When I read about your style moniker ("Modern Classic Pretty" sounds fine) and your description of your body, the idea of a "column of colour" quickly comes to mind. Somehow, a colour of column always look classic and often pretty, and--especially if you add a topper-- it will make it more difficult to discover that you actually have a short waist.

The colum of colour could be i.e. a black tee/pullover & black trousers (like Audrey Hepburn). But it needn't be black--it could be any colour which suits you. And the trousers could be substituted by a skirt. Choosing bottoms (trousers/skirts) in stretchy fabrics or with some elasticity at the waist might be helpful. And don't tuck in your tops.

A few column of colours can serve as the foundation on which you build the rest of your wardrobe. You can easily add toppers (try jackets in various lengths, fabrics and colours) and scarves, jewellery, shoes and other accessories.

Visible/bold earrings, scarves, necklaces and brooches will divert attention from your waist and hips and make others focus on your face and upper body. And fab shoes and hosiery will direct attention to your long legs. You may find that avoiding details (belts, pockets, etc.) in your midsection will contribute to a more balanced look.

Choose accessories which emphasize your style moniker. Examples: ballet flats, pearls, printed silk scarfs, quilted bags. And don't forget the impact of smaller touches such as visible lipstick and pastel or clear nail polish.

Best wishes for your style evolution.

The Cat

Veteran

By the way, there's nothing wrong with sales shopping. But know your priorities, and stick to them. Make a list, keep it on your phone, and refer to it often.

In general: Buy first the items you need most, dependant on your lifestyle. But try to be prepared for those special occasions. If you make sure that you always have at least one great "column of colour" (perhaps in black, blue or wine), you may just need to add an elegant topper, chic shoes and glittery earrings, and these items shouldn't be too difficult to find. Some of them might be in your closet already, and if not, then add them to your priority list, and do buy them when you see them at reasonable prices.

Anonymous

Welcome!
I think I’m pretty close to a Modern Classic Pretty dressier too, so we might be able to exchange style tips.
I also have a small wardrobe, and a fairly small budget, and had to build a wardrobe of basics and essentials AND experiment with my style at the same time. What did this mean? It meant it took TIME, a lot of time, to get my wardrobe in good shape. So think of it as a journey.

You might try allocating some of your dollars to fun stuff and experiments, and then another chunk to getting your basics and essentials in order.

Sal

Veteran

Welcome to the forum!! I think you have already had some great advice and it sounds like you know the style direction you want to go, and areas where fit will be more of a challenge.

I have a moderate size wardrobe. I found the biggest thing that made my pieces more workable were having good quality essentials that made everything just work. What these are will vary from person to person - it might be black ankle pants, or a striped tee, or a pair of camel ankle boots (these are all in my wardrobe). Without a good black and white striped tee there are many outfits I cannot wear - it completes several different looks. Same with black ankle pants.

Sale shopping does work for some people especially if you can find your size, or are very clear on what you want.

anne

Veteran

Hi Lynette,
Welcome to the forum. Your post resonated with me as I'm also pear shaped (though longwaisted/ short legged) and also frugal and tend to prefer NOT going shopping. We are somewhat a minority here in that respect!
You've had some great advice. All the best!

Gigi

Veteran

I used to be a clearance-rack and sale shopper. Now I know that if I want clothes that I really like, I am most likely going to have to pay full price. I know this because I have sometimes watched whether an item went on sale after I bought it, and most of the time it was sold out by the time the retailer would have put it on sale.

If you are very short waisted, I would consider shopping in the petite section. "Petite" doesn't necessarily mean small; petite clothes are designed for women who are shorter, which means the clothing has shorter waists. I am 5'2" and am also short waisted, and it is very rare that I can find something to fit in misses' sizes. Petite clothing often doesn't have as many styles and colors as misses', but you can occasionally find a gem.

I have a bigger rear end and wear a larger size on bottom than on top, so dresses are really hard to fit. Fit-and-flare dresses (ones that are fitted at the waist and then have a looser skirt) are wonderful, as are ones made from very stretchy knits. I have only a handful of dresses in my wardrobe becuase they are hard to fit. I usually stick to skirts and tops rather than dresses because I don't want to mess around with alterations.

As Angie said, you are worth full price. Most of my wardrobe was bought at full price because I knew that to get those items, I had to act and not wait. If you are pretty easy to fit off the rack, then yes, bargain shopping can work most of the time. But if you're hard to fit, then you will probably have to pay full price for items that you will really love.

rachylou

Veteran

How exciting that you’re embarking on this project! I love reading everyone’s suggestions, they’re great. It’s a chance for me too, to think about my own setup.

I will tell you that my most memorable takeaway from Angie and YLF, the one thing that had such a profound impact on my wardrobe and putting it in working order was this: evaluating how I really spent my time and in what proportions. Changed everything.

Staysfit

Veteran

Welcome and I wish you well with this project. I have some personal experience with creating a new wardrobe from scratch. I prepared for it in advance, knowing that I would be spending much more money on wardrobe items than my typical budget. I have a medium large wardrobe, and am not a sale shopper, mostly because my size is typically sold out by the time things go on sale. However, I have found that since my choices are good, I feel great when I get dressed. Now that my base wardrobe is built I have not continued to spend lots of money, even though I feared I would. It was worth prioritizing my time and effort to redo my wardrobe.

I started with two things after clearing out old, worn and lackluster items that weren’t working. 1. A style statement and style adjectives which were revised several times until they felt just right.
2. 6 main colors, including neutrals for each season from which to base my clothing selections. This was probably the best decision I made because everything is cohesive and works well together.

I also did a lot of what everyone else is suggesting in terms of figuring out what silhouette works well for me. I had some favorite “uniforms” from which I based a good number of selections and continue to do so. I tried a lot of new things that I might not have tried in the past. Some worked and some did not, but the process helped me to love the things that worked even more.

I don’t know of anyone that doesn’t have fit issues when they purchase off the rack. I pay for tailoring. It is worth every penny. People look at me and think I have an easy time finding clothes. I look taller than I am (5,8.5”) and I am thin. I have long arms, and slight IT tendencies, so tops and jackets are very hard to fit. If the shoulders fit, everything else is too big. I bring all my tops to the tailor. I prefer knits because they mould to my body and seem to avoid the fit issue.

I documented my process in detail. I deleted my pictures, but my posts may still be helpful. Good luck!

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

Hi! I haven’t been around long and am still learning a lot here. People here are so wonderful about this kind of advice.This thread is a great example. You even got a post from Angie--I'm jealous!

I did the “research expedition” where I didn’t buy anything that someone recommended to you. It was a lot more fun than I expected. I hadn’t realized how different the impacts of the questions “should I buy it” and “do I like it” really are until I did that.

I expected sales associates to walk away if they figured out they weren’t going to make a sale, but I let it slip out in Michael Kors and Kate Spade. They smiled and seemed to get even more into helping me once they knew it was just for fun. I guess they like fashion and liked the chance to play. So then I mentioned it in other stores and had a great afternoon.

On the prices: several people insiist that buying things on sale will lead to a disorganized mess of way too much stuff that doesn't work. I’m not convinced. It seems to me that looking for lower prices just puts more weight on the “patience” P, because you’re looking at a somewhat smaller selection, so it will probably take longer to find things. (There are some people who wear sizes that always sell out fast, so they rarely find anything good on sale, but that’s not the case for me.)

I think the main point is to be careful of what’s driving your purchase. Don’t get things because they are on sale (even if you reject some things because the price is too high). Do all the homework to figure out what you’re looking for, and let that drive your buying. I prefer to look at things that have been permanently marked down—flash sales will drive you crazy, I’m told.

Having things that “spark joy” is something Marie Kondo has written about. You might enjoy her book if you haven’t read it.

And I hope you will occasionally work tales of your travels into your posts here

Lynette

Wow! I am feeling so supported! It's like having a group of cheerleaders encouraging me on! Building a wardrobe has been intimidating for me in the past but I am feeling really hopeful right now! Thank you all for this wealth of advise and for sharing your stories!

Ann, glad to meet a fellow frugal pear shaped fabber! Looking forward to sharing tips with each other.

Sal, quality essentials makes total sense. That should be the building block of my new wardrobe.

Smittie, so happy to meet a fashion soulmate! Taking time to build a wardrobe sounds right really me.

The Cat, thank you for the wealth of information! A column of color (a la Audrey Hepburn!) to camouflage my short waist is perfect. I remember wearing that long ago when I had an office job. I'm going to try it again.

Janet, I have enjoyed your wiw posts and thought we shared a similar body type. I am at a transition period after traveling for a year and am not sure what my daily life will be. For my work (and actually for most activities) I can dress very casually. My area of California is extremely casual. But the style I love is a bit dressier. I know I shouldn't collect for my imaginary life. I will have to learn balance. I agree that dark wash jeans are the first thing to look for!

Style fan- The PPP plan sounds like the best way to go. And I will commit to quality from now on. Thanks!

Joy- I love seeing your posts! I do think we have similar style goals. Being picky and willing to pay full price will be new goals for me.

Lynn, so happy to know there are pear shaped women out there looking fab! The website for the customized dresses looks amazing! I didn't realize such a place existed! Thank you.

3style, I like the idea of easy victories! I can usually find a tailored jacket or blazer that fits and this is the item I love the most!

Angie, MCP it will be! Thank you for all your words of advice and encouragement. All of these ideas sound just right for me. I'm so looking forward to this style journey with your help and the support of the forum!

Unfrumped (such a great name!), retail research sounds like the best idea! I have never tried on clothes just for fun. It has always been the desperate hunt for something I can make do with. I am going to allow myself this luxury in the near future.

La Pedestrienne- It's nice to know that others have rebuilt their wardrobe successfully. Paying full price FOR THE RIGHT ITEM will be my first challenge. Budgeting and using the PPP plan are good ideas, too. Thanks! I see that you are a fellow traveler. I look forward to sharing about our adventures!

Gigi- it seems that paying full price has been a theme here! It will be a new adventure for me. I do occasionally find a petite that works but I have long arms and legs. It's worth a look though.

Rachylou- I agree! We need to be realistic about what we need!

Staysfit- I like how you were very orderly in the process of creating a new wardrobe. Paying full price and tailoring will be new to me but it sounds like it really makes the difference. A color scheme sounds good too!

Fashiontern- I'm glad to hear from a fellow sale shopper! Doing the homework and having a fashion research expedition sounds like it is worth the effort. Thanks for the book recommendation too.

I have been looking At YLF for several years. It feels so good to now be participating, making new friends, and sharing the journey with such a wonderful group of women. Thank you all!

DonnaF

Veteran

Welcome! Lots of great advice here. I used to be a 100% sale/bargain shopper. I finally figured out that 90% of my thrift store and Ross purchases were orphans due to not going with other stuff, slight *off* fit, or something else wrong -- so they really weren't bargains at all.

I love Nordstrom because of their return and repair policy and their alterations. They will repair items that fall apart, no charge. I have had a blouse hem, elastic top pants, bra, and top repaired. I have also had numerous pants and sleeves shortened within their free alteration allotment. I bought a too long lined dress at full price, and when something is full price it doesn't go on the alteration budget; it's free. I figured I came out ahead that way.

My Nordstrom strategy is to put everything that appeals to me on their Wish List. Then, I wait for a markdown and buy it then or decide against it. I check every day. Of course, stuff sometimes sells out before then, but I keep stuff on that wait list because they sometimes come back in stock. I tend to wait to buy full price on my Triple Points days, or now they have 10X points days.

Be brutal about returns. Do not hesitate to return an item if it is not 10/10 even if it is complete steal. I am also learning that if I post here on a K/R (keep or return), it usually means a little voice in the back of my head is saying I should return it even if the lovely folks here are advising me to keep.

Lynette

Donna- This is all good advice. My closet has always been full of orphans with the price tags still in them for years! No more of that!