Michelle - I'm with you! Sleeve length ... one of my big challenges. I have super-short arms, and have to shorten every single jacket I buy. (My tailor loves to see me coming with a pile of jackets to be shortened.) Sweaters can look sloppy because I have to either roll or push the sleeves up. 3/4 length never looks right on me - it usually hits me mid-forearm and looks like a regular sleeve that's just a bit too short. I'll sometimes roll up my jacket sleeves, like you see on boyfriend jackets now, but I can never get that great "scrunched" look Angie always has in her pics. I don't mind so much for casual, but when I want to look polished, the tailor wins!
I prefer elbow length on most other tops, but they're so hard to find. I have a big bust and I don't like sleeves that end mid upper-arm, which on me is about at bust level - it seems to draw the eye right to that area. Elbow length just looks better to my eye.
It's still hard to find sleeves that are not the "bad" cap length, especially on summer t-shirts.