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Ask Angie: Outfits to see clients in at home.

ElleH

Veteran

Hi Angie, I see clients at my home & I'm not sure what I should wear. I don't wear shoes in the house & I ask clients to remove them too. That is something that is probably weird for some of them but they do it anyway. Lately I feel like my outfit is incomplete without the shoes. Also, I am limited to pants that are hemmed for flats when I wear pants. Are bare feet ok? Should I have some inside shoes reserved for clients? I couldn't have multiple pairs to go with every outfit or I would have to double my shoes. Should I wear my regular outdoor shoes when clients come & just make sure I clean the soles first? Should I accept whatever dirt is on their shoes (I do have a door mat)? I have carpet & live in a sometimes muddy area. It feels normal to me after traveling in India. Also how should I dress for seeing clients? I am a health coach, not a very conventional or conservative one. Thanks:)

Dressing

34 replies

Latest reply was from ElleH

Diana

Veteran

Not Angie, but it's common for Chinese-American households (and probably Chinese households all over the world) to be shoe-free but to have a basket of slippers inside the door for guests. Like these:
http://www.amazon.com/Mesh-Sli.....&keyw
(Or there is a fabric type too, that I can't find a link to right now). When I visit this type of home, I always make sure my outfit works sans shoes as well.

Perhaps you could do something like that? I worry though that some people might be squicked out at the thought of wearing slippers that others have worn though... especially in your case where you have a lot of different people who are not friends or relatives. Not sure it would be prohibitively expensive to have new slippers for everyone, cheap as they are...

For you, I think you should maybe invest in a couple of pairs of indoor-only shoes, like ballet flats or slipper flats or something like that.

I personally do keep a shoe-free house, and I don't even wear slippers usually - I prefer to go barefoot. I don't ask my guests to remove their shoes (unless its snowing or raining) but most do anyway when they see the shoes by the door.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Elle, what is your line of work? Let's start there.

We wear slippers at home but do not ask guests to remove their shoes. It's a HUGE debate as to what is considered right and wrong - and we have talked about it at length here and on the blog.

ElleH

Veteran

Hi Angie,

I am a health coach, healer.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Ah. So the setting is VERY relaxed. Do you speak with your clients at a table or on the couch.

ElleH

Veteran

On the couch. Very relaxed yes. But I sit in front of them so I wouldn't wear a skirt that might be able to be seen up. I also like to cover my arms, tattoos for certain new clients. Of course no cleavage but I know you wouldn't recommend that for anyone's work clothes. I need to be able to sit comfortably. I prefer not to wear jeans so not that casual. I'm thinking trousers & blouses or shirts with blazers but still being me. I'm also open to dresses with leggings under them. Tunics over leggings. I feel that bare feet look better than slippers, as they tend to go with pajamas. But maybe I could just wear clean shoes indoors & allow the clients to leave their shoes on.

MsMary

Veteran

I say this with all love and respect, but I would feel uncomfortable if someone asked me to remove my shoes, and I would be uncomfortable seeing a health practitioner who was barefoot during my session. (I'm in So Cal, if it matters. Shoes-off isn't really the culture here.)

I'd say slippers all around (for you and your clients) sounds like a good compromise.

ElleH

Veteran

Mary K I'm not offended That's why I ask what people here think, to get other views. I think the streets have dog poop on them, amongst other things, which get on shoes, then inside, but here in the US people wear shoes inside so they would find me weird, though my work is likened to that you would find in a yoga community, where people are expected to remove their shoes. Anyway, I have all kinds of clients so I suppose everyone wearing shoes might be best. I used to wear Indian clothing so the barefoot thing worked with my outfits. I'd rather wear shoes than slippers though. Slippers to me are for pajamas. And if I'm not going to have guests remove shoes then I might as well leave mine on. If I had a choice I wouldn't have carpet, but I don't so there it is. Just have to get carpet steam cleaned.

Greek Goddess

I think the tunics and leggings etc would go great with some nice Indian type sandals...maybe with beads on or some decoration. They sell ballet type slippers here for just a euro or so a pair brand new so you could provide these for you clients if you wished. You could also wear yoga style loose clothing if it looks good on you.

I have to admit, if I were a client and someone asked me to take my shoes off to go into their house I would feel uncomfortable and I would not feel relaxed. No offence, but I would think the person asking me to take their shoes off was more worried about their floor than me.......... I presume a relaxed happy client is what you are aiming for before they have treatment. Perhaps when you book the appointment you could ask them to bring their own slippers/flip flops to wear?

Glory

Veteran

My two cents worth. I don't think I would ask people to remove their shoes but would have a basket of slippers available which can be washed after each use. For you I would look at a comfortable flat in a neutral that you could wear with most of your items.

Sara L.

Veteran

I agree with Greek Goddess that I would be uncomfortable taking my shoes off in this sort of situation. I don't wear shoes in my house and I usually take them off in the homes of friends and relatives, but taking my shoes off in front of a stranger would feel weird. After we had established a relationship, it would probably be fine, but not at first.

T-Rex

Veteran

I would worry that a new client might not be expecting this, and may be embarassed if their socks are worn out, don't match, whatever. You may also have clients with perpetually cold feet, due to poor circulation or whatever. If they don't plan ahead and wear warm socks, they may be physically uncomfortable in bare feet. Do you let your clients know before their first visit that this is a custom in you home? If not, is there a not-weird way to warn them? I ditto the idea of providing slippers of some kind in case the client wants them. Another idea might be to put down throw rugs or runners that can be easily cleaned in the areas that are high traffic, like from the front door to the sofa, and from the sofa to the bathroom. This would protect your carpet from outside dirt while allowing your clients to keep their shoes on.

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

I think I would invest in a long runner (washable rug) that goes from the front door into the house so at least there is some "buffer" zone. In fact, washable rugs on top of carpet isnt' a bad idea in other places too. You could roll the runner up when not needed and wash it as desired. But I would make it obvious that I like shoes removed by wearing some sort of very soft ballet flat slipper myself and having a shoe rack near the door with shoes on it (we have this and though we don't ask people, they almost always offer to take off their shoes!). There are shoe "covers" that can be purchased that fit over the person's shoes - but they may feel too weird wearing those. I have wood floors but large wool carpets so I do prefer to go shoeless indoors, but I'm not overly concerned if others - especially elderly people - don't offer to take theirs off.

For how to dress - and I've been to a home just like you're describing before - I would just wear professional, casual clothing. Soft natural fabrics, trousers with blouses mostly, maybe a blazer or jacket if you prefer. I would think of things from places like Jjill or Soft Surroundings or Garnet Hill at first thought. I don't know why, but there clothing just seems to fit the description.

dizzys

There are a lot of families that go shoeless in home..not a big deal. You could look into those sock things hospitals give to their patients with the padding under. I would wear an inside ballet slippers of some sort and let your customers know you have a shoeless home before hand.

T-Rex

Veteran

BTW, I see no problem with you having bare feet while meeting with clients. The fact that it is in your home, combined with the nature of your work, makes this seem perfectly normal. Even expected. I like the idea of tunics over leggings. Blazers and trousers combined with bare feet sounds like a mismatch to me. I imagine you looking like you are dressed for the office, but you just forgot your shoes! If I imagine pieces that are a bit unstructured and relaxed, it looks good to me. Still polished and pulled together, but in synch with the comfort of walking around in bare feet.

ElleH

Veteran

Thanks for the input everyone. It is good to hear different points of view because I will have different clients. I think I will just let people wear their shoes. It isn't just about cleanliness. It is a spiritual thing, & in some parts of the world people would know it wasn't that my floor was more important than them, but not a common custom for a lot of people in the USA, except for Hawaii, so I will just allow people to wear shoes. Anyone who finds it weird removing shoes at all would be just as uncomfortable with slippers or shoe covers make me seem like a germ phobe. So I think I will let them wear shoes. I don't usually ask people to remove their shoes, we have a shoe rack for our shoes & they see it. They do it because I suppose they want to honor our customs. I do yoga on my carpet, with my face pressed into it. I could start to use a yoga mat. One must remember though when you roll a yoga mat, whatever is underneath ends up on the top side.

ElleH

Veteran

I ddidn't want to go into my work here, for fear of judgment. My mother doesn't even know what I do because when I tried to tell her she was against it. It isn't really coaching. It is spiritual healing. It is not like going to a therapist. I think that most people understand that I am different lol, the shoes are the least weird part of the whole experience, but I also hear what you are saying & think that the less weird it is for newbies the better so shoes on is fine. They are not laying down on a table & getting bodywork, so it isn't like they have to take shoes off for it to work.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

I have a few suggestions.

Give your clients *the option* of keeping their shoes on. Ask them their preference instead of asking them to remove their shoes. Although we wear slippers in our own home (Eurasian Mum had a no shoes at home policy when I was growing up), I do not like to be told to remove my shoes in other people's homes. I intensely dislike walking in other peoples homes sans footwear. I find that - VERY ironically - unhygienic. It puts me into a bad mood. So I ask at the front door whether I need to remove my shoes, which appeases my mind a little. And in homes where I know I have to remove my shoes, I bring my own slippers.

Perhaps create a collection of "home shoes" that you only wear inside. I believe it's a good idea to keep your shoes on for the first meetings with clients.

There are very strong opposing opinions about this shoe removal topic, Elle. It will be confusing and you cannot please everyone!

Thanks for being a good sport and for having an open mind here. It's not easy and you are fab.

ElleH

Veteran

Thanks Angie,

So I guess my reason for the post is because I was leaning away from the Indian clothing I used to wear. Clothing that made the barefoot thing normal for me & even for them as it seemed like they were entering a temple or healing space. Now changing my work clothes is what made me feel like sans shoes for me looks odd. If I choose to go shoeless, which is now unhygienic for me if others aren't lol, can wear the indoor shoes I have. But my questionnpw is if I don't wear Indian clothing what do I wear? Office clothing? I don't want to wear yoga clothing. Tunics & leggings like Greek Goddess suggested? Loose natural fibre pants & tops like Textstyle suggested? Thanks

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Elle, why can't you wear your usual casual jeans outfits. You look smashing and polished in those. No office wear required.

ElleH

Veteran

So you think jeans are ok? I guess so or you wouldn't suggest it lol. I need to get different tops perhaps. All my button downs are Frank & Eileen, not supposed to be ironed. Perhaps too casual?
Also when one sees a doctor I think the white coat gives us confidence in them. I'm not a doctor so can't wear that but if I dress like my clients they may not have confidence. They need to have a lot of faith in what I do. If they see my rock chick persona I dunno...I used to wear the Indian clothing all the time but now it is only for work. I also feel that might be off putting too so wanted something neutral but professional, but I can't even explain or know what I need which is why I'm at a loss I guess.

Gaylene

Veteran

Oddly enough, my carpet cleaner person told me that it is better to wear shoes on carpet as opposed to going barefoot. Shoes can track in dust and dirt, but this can often be dealt with by a good vacuuming. Bare feet, on the other hand, deposit oils and perspiration on carpets which are much harder to remove, even with chemical carpet cleaners. Even socks are a bit dubious to me because some people's feet can get quite sweaty in their shoes.

Even though I have light carpets and prefer to wear slippers in the house, I expect anyone visiting will keep their footwear on, except if it is muddy or wet. In that case, removal is fine, but, around here, under those conditions, most people bring their own indoor footwear when they visit.

rachylou

Veteran

Mmm. It's not so ironic, Angie. Because while removing shoes keeps the floors a bit cleaner of dust and dirt, it exposes everyone to whatever foot diseases everybody has.

As a health coach, Elle, I think you could get away with asking people to remove their shoes, but I'm not sure you really want that if you want to avoid athletes foot and such.

ElleH

Veteran

I understand people not wanting their feet exposed to things. It's just that I sit & lay on my floor, sometimes face down, so the floor to me is like a bed. I guess some of the cultures that remove their shoes sit on the floor more.

Pic 1 is what I am wearing today to see a new client. A bit more westernized without being office like or rock chick.
Pic 2 & 3 is are what I would wear in the past for clients or teaching.
Pic 4 is what I used to wear with Indian bottoms & shawls etc but thinking of now wearing them with Western bottoms. What do you think?
Pic 5 is a top I'm thinking of wearing with jeans. I don't like it with the loose linen pants.

I'm really at a loss as to how present myself when working. Maybe I should be completely westernized.

I'm changing. I used to live in a different home, full of statues & incense & listening to spiritual music & dressing that way & going to those events all the time. That is who my friends were & what my life was. I still do the work that I learned to do there because I am good at it & I like helping people. I since married a guy who is more like my past. I always kept those friends from the past & went to rock concerts too. I used to work in the music industry. He used to produce music videos. A lot for Duran Duran Angie, I know you're a fan. We moved into a modern home, even though it is in a hippy community, so my interior design changed to match that. I don't hang around with the chanting healer yoga people or go to those events & I feel more comfortable dressing in the ways I have shown in my WIWs. It is a return to the old me but hopefully updated.

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Anonymous

I am not much help with the wardrobe aspect but I do have a comment regarding the slippers. I went thru a lot when we were trying to buy a home with that "no shoe" policy. I personally refused to wear the guest slippers and asked my family to do the same. I even had to refuse checking on a couple houses, because they had cats to boot. I love cats but asking me to walk barefoot amidst cat dander, is not really a good idea, given I have a severe allergy.

Generally speaking, it just felt weird to show up to a stranger's house, then being asked to take my shoes off and wear used slippers. Some clients might see that as off putting. At the minimum, you should inform them before hand.

What I did was that I ended up buying a bunch of cheap socks, which I tossed at the end of each visit. One homeowner was super clever. He had a basket of those shoe covers surgeons use. I then took off my shoes and put the little suckers on. There is an idea,

I walk around my house barefoot but I do not ask people to remove their shoes. I have hardwood floors that can easily be cleaned up afterwards.

ElleH

Veteran

Thanks everyone, I have decided to allow shoes so I don't need any more convincing I would never ask people to wear slippers that others have worn. I did buy vintage boots but I wear them with socks, as I do all my boots.

Another comment about the work wear. I don't think I feel stylish in them anymore. When it was my style persona it felt good. I know I can still heal people without dressing the part. I'm confused. I need to check out some role models. Successful ones.

Gaylene

Veteran

I'm probably not a potential client, but I think the outfit you wore in the first picture would be seen by most people as quite professional and attractive.

T-Rex

Veteran

I really like the outfit in Pic 1. I think it is appropriate for your work, and it looks nice. And I think the tops in Pic 3 would look fine with Western bottoms, such as jeans, leggings, or flowy wide leg pants. I have a few tunics with a length and silhouette like that one in the middle, and I wear them that way. I am viewing this with a Western eye, of course, so what would look normal and even cute to me might look weird to someone from a different culture.

T-Rex

Veteran

Oops, I was referring to the tops in Pic 4...but you realized what I meant.

catgirl

Veteran

I'm the opposite of MaryK - where I live it is considered rude not to take your shoes off when entering someone's house, or at least offer to do so. I'd say go with the local norms... if you are working in a non-Western health related job, it is certainly very Indian to remove your shoes!

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