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Argggggghh

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Just venting because I know there will be sympathetic ears here...

For some unknown reason, my husband thought he would be "helpful" and throw my laundry in with his. I just came home and pulled a pair of tights, lacy underwear, a bra, and two brand new knit tops (worn once, this was the first washing) out of the dryer. Gah. I'm just hoping the shirts didn't shrink -- one of them looks smaller now.

I'm afraid to even ask if he washed them in hot or cold water.

After I calmed myself, I told him as nicely as I could that I really appreciated the thought, but I prefer he leave my laundry up to me!

General

37 replies

Latest reply was from Isabel

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Hang in there.

*makes you a cuppa*

Helpful husbands can mean trouble, but we don't love them any less.

Keep us posted.

rae

(website)

Veteran

Oh noes! Fingers crossed for your things. It *was* a sweet thought, but why couldn't it have been the dishes or the car?? :T

Thankfully, my DH is just as neurotic as I am about his shirts and the dryer. We always do laundry together, looking over each other's shoulders.

Raisin

Veteran

Ahh no, I hope your shirt didn't shrink! Well meaning husbands....but yah I tell mine to stay away from the laundry too!

Lynne

Veteran

Poor you, and poor hubs! Fingers crossed for you xo.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Thanks, Angie, Rae and Rae!

We've been together almost 17 years. You think he'd know by now?

Although now I feel bad I'm complaining because he just called me to tell me he broke a tooth. That's a way bigger deal than my clothes. I guess if a couple things from my closet getting ruined was the worst thing that happened to me today, it's not the end of the world.

JulieJohn

Veteran

Sometimes the help is worth more than the clothes (scandalous talk, I know). ;~)

Aida

Veteran

Oh no! I hope both the clothes and his tooth are all fine. My way of solving this is to just do ALL the laundry, his and mine, and threaten harm if he does anything to mine heh.

Jjsloane

Veteran

This happened ONCE with DH. Results were: Top small enough for cat to wear. My reaction was enough to result in DH being relegated to things like trash, cat litter, but killing and making meals. As much as I am overwhelmed by the family laundry he knows this is one area I do not want any more help than toting baskets to the basement. Don't get me started on the lectures about putting non-stick cookware in the dishwasher...

bj1111

Veteran

gah!

good hubby....nice hubby....just keep repeating until you believe it.

Sveta

(website)

Veteran

What a day - both for you and your hubby! I hope at least some of your goodies survived the treatment. Good wishes to your hubby, I have been there - not fun at all!
My mom cannot understand why I am the only person in the house doing laundry...this very reason. I prefer them to vacuum or clean the bathroom!:-)

RunnerChick

I totally understand - I am married to one of those helpful sorts myself

MsMary

Veteran

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

And, uh, too bad about that instant karma thing...

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Thanks, everybody! Nice to know I'm not the only one, although Jeanne, I'm sorry about your cat's new shirt! My mom did that once -- I was in high school and had saved up for a wool fair isle sweater. Yeah, it would have fit one of the dogs quite nicely after that.

I have to laugh when he "helps" sometimes. There are a lot of things he does around here that are truly helpful, but when it comes to certain things, I can be a control freak. We had a little tutorial recently on how to load a dishwasher without putting glasses in the lower rack where they emerge in shards, and how to distribute the utensils among the compartments rather than dump a whole handful in one. And I made a public service announcement to the household last week that the new adopted storage space for shoes -- next to the garage door -- very nearly caused me to face-plant while carrying bags of groceries in from the car.

MsMary

Veteran

LOL, in our house it's DH giving the tutorials, which is a large part of the reason we each do our own laundry now. And apparently the dishwasher is loaded incorrectly the 90% of the time I load it. :-/

Mo

(website)

Veteran

Ooh, I've missed having a dishwasher so long I don't even use the one we have here now. How funny.
The BF tends to do laundry all together, no separating by color or fabric type, but he washes cold and dries low so not too much damage gets done. Pilling on shirts that wash with towels is about the worst of it. And he's actually caught on to not dry premium denim ever
Hope your tops survive Janet!

Anonymous

My husband has ruined many of my clothes so the rule is he isn't allowed to touch my laundry ever. He washes all his together. I take his shirts and work khakis and iron them for him though. I like him to look nice at work.

citygirldc

(website)

Veteran

Hubby does laundry which is a nice. I do all the kitchen stuff. Sorry to hear about your tops.

catgirl

Veteran

SIGH. *pat pat* on the shoulder

I usually ruin my husband's t-shirts by shrinking them, so now we have a legally separated laundry system.

catgirl

Veteran

Jjsloane, I have to ask: what is "but killing"?

Or should I ask?

Gaylene

Veteran

My poor husband is so apologetic after he does something like that, I end up feeling sorrier for him than for me. Clothes come and go, but, even after 39 years of marriage and couple of shrunken sweaters, he is a keeper!

ETA: Also interested in the "but killing"; inquiring minds want to know...

Carole

Veteran

I hate to even admit my husband hasn't done a load of clothes in probably 20 years, maybe as long as we have been married, so more like 30! He doesn't know how to work any of the kitchen appliances either, I know, I'm an enabler. I know I'm not a complete failure, both my son and daughter are great cooks and do there own laundry!

Does that make you feel any better?

ironkurtin

Veteran

I think she meant "bug killing."

My husband is forbidden to touch the laundry. Ever. Much like I am forbidden certain sacred tools in his workshop.

Isabel

Veteran

This left a pit in my stomach..it is soooo difficult when someone does something out of kindness and THEY MESS IT UP !!!!!

I felt the pit because it has happened to me and brought me to tears. When I used to work, I would go to Bloomingdale's every spring and buy one or two beautiful cashmere sweaters ( back then, cashmere was rarer and more expansive ). I would store them during the late Spring/Summer and then break them out in the fall. One week in mid-fall, I wore the two that I had bought the previous Spring for the first time. My husband saw me wear them and talk about how happy I was with them - so he decided to wash them for me so that I could wear them again ASAP.....

Don't laugh. I SOBBED. They came out of the dryer ( yup, the DRYER ) small enough to MAYBE fit the Taco Bell Chihuahua. DH told me to go buy a couple more, no matter what the cost...all I could manage to get out was " THESE WERE SEASONAL COLORS !!!! WHHHHAAAAAA. "

Diana

Veteran

Oh no! I hope your clothes managed to make it through relatively unscathed.

Fiance and I have already decided that when we are married we are keeping our laundry separated. I am anal about how I wash things and have very specific rules for how I wash each particular item or type of item . He washes everything on hot but on the other hand actually irons his shirts religiously (whereas I can count on one hand the number of times I've used my iron in the past year, mostly for hemming or crafting). So if we each do our own, then I can wash things how I want and he can actually have ironed shirts. =P I guess we will have to negotiate things like sheets and towels.

I did however manage to convert him to my scentless laundry detergent though, so I am happy.

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

DH and I realized about 25 years ago that if we had any hope in going "the long haul", he couldn't do the laundry. I am however teaching DS how to read labels and separate into different loads, how to fold, etc. I hope to make him a good husband for some lucky lady!

I hope your items will be ok Janet. And I hope hubby's tooth will be ok too!

Deborah

Veteran

Oh no Janet! We have an agreement in my house that DH does his laundry, I do mine and Master 9's and who ever gets to the towels, sheets etc first does it. Works a treat! I hope your garments are all ok.

Scarlet

Veteran

After a couple of "incidents" it is clear in our house that there is no laundry until I have personally sorted it. Actually I bought a bunch of laundry bags that I have labeled which I can presort into, and this means we can both get it done when we have time. There is a second sorting step though before using the dryer which must be done by me. However after a few years hubby can do this himself but asks about anything he deems suspicious or just hangs all of my stuff to air dry. I on the other hand am not allowed to load the dishwasher because I don't effectively "maximize" the use of space.

Janet, of course you were upset. Look at how we all hem and haw over what we should buy and how we should spend our money. You even tried to calm yourself down and be civil about it, so you aren't doing anything wrong. Nothing you described sounds like being a control freak.

Ingunn

(website)

Veteran

Oh no! A familiar accident for sure. I hope the ruined garments are fairly easy to replace. He meant to do good, and that is always a forgiving factor. I'm also the one who does the laundry in my family, but recently my husband took up cycling and bought himself a lot of expensive gear, so now he does all the sportswear and wool washing in the family - very convenient:)

I hope his tooth is on the mend by now!

ironkurtin

Veteran

Isabel, I put my cashmere in the drier all the time and it doesn't shrink. Maybe it was the weave?

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