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Anyone doing / done Whole 30?

viva

Veteran

I'm on day 7 and not sure what to do. On one hand, I definitely feel better having cut out sugar (a weakness) and grains (although I miss them a lot -- morning cereal, mostly). I ate very little dairy to start (skim milk with that cereal, very rarely cheese) so that has been easy. I love eggs but I am tired of them and worried about how many I am eating. I am not much of a meat eater and I am a little overwhelmed by all the meat, chicken, fish, etc. I am tired of eating nuts. I really want legumes and quinoa.

Other than a sugar addition, my near-vegetarian diet is pretty good ... I am really doing this for my husband, who has a lot of weight to lose. I have a very good metabolism (so far) and pretty solid eating habits and my weight rarely fluctuates more than a few pounds -- although I did need to break my sugar habit because I gained 3 pounds over the holidays and was having difficult getting them off.

DH is finding it much easier to stay on his plan if he sees that I am eating a more restricted diet. I kind of hate it but I also really need for him to be successful. Ugh.

Do you like / did you like the Whole 30? Why did you do it? Is it worth it?

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38 replies

Latest reply was from viva

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

I've looked into it, but I think for me it would be much simpler and healthier to just give up most of the bread/pasta and give up wine. My diet is otherwise pretty healthy. I would ideally like to lose7-10 lbs permanently, but for me I think that would be a pretty significant weight loss and would take some discipline. I do eat grass fed beef due to anemia that isn't easily resolved any other way. I can't eat nuts so it would be tough to find enough other high protein/high iron options. I already eat eggs and probably too many of them and I love vegetables and eat a lot of them. I'm not big on dairy - I eat some cheese but not nearly as much as I used to when I was much younger.

It would be hard to eat differently than DH so I understand and admire your support.

carter

Veteran

My favorite topic:-). I have to leave for an appointment shortly, so I will come back to this later. Is there anything specific you need thoughts on, or are you just looking for the bigger picture of "WHY" I choose this and the results?

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Viv, why are you on the diet - to support hubs?

Belladogga

I think it's wonderful that you are making this effort to support your husband. Hey, at Day 7 you're already quarter way there!

I tried to do a Whole 30 last year and gave up after about a week partly because my SO was not interested in doing it too. I didn't experience the significant positive effects that some people reported. But the fact that there was non compliant food in the house, I was preparing some of that noncompliant food for my SO and he kept questioning whether what I was trying to do made sense certainly didn't help me to keep going.

In retrospect, I realize I wasn't eating enough food to keep me satisfied and that my problems didn't necessarily need a Whole 30 to be resolved. My motivations were my sugar addiction, significant joint pain and creeping weight gain. Over the last six months my joint pain resolved itself. I now think it was caused by a very stressful job situation and hormones/menopause. My weight has stabilized about 6 lbs higher than it was a year ago and I am fatter around the waist, hips and thighs but not overweight. Again, menopause. Since January I have been tackling the sugar addiction by gradually reducing my sugar consumption. I cut out sodas, juices and most processed foods and am trying to eat more vegetables. Have had a few lapses but don't beat myself up . Like you, I don't want to eat so much meat (SO is a meat and potatoes guy) and I just do fish or legumes for myself when I do beef for him. My SO has been a lot more understanding this time around. I think he better understands that I am serious about changing my eating habits long term but I'm not going to make him give up (all) his beef, biscuits and ice-cream and he has cut back somewhat on carbs as well. It helps that he's onboard.

As you said, your DH will do better if you're doing the Whole 30 with him but ultimately he will have to keep making the choices that will allow him to drop and keep the weight off. Maybe you can discuss with him the option of you doing a modified version - still a restricted diet - that satisfies your goal that is mainly sugar reduction while he works toward weight loss. You would still be working together on improving your food choices for better health.

Laura (rhubarbgirl)

(website)

Veteran

I've done it and found it unsustainable long-term, partially for cost reasons because if all you eat is meat and veggies, your food costs are a lot higher than if you can extend meals with starches, beans, etc. It also takes a lot more time shopping and cooking.

A lot of the paleo stuff can be a good way to clean up your diet if you've been eating a lot of processed food, but I'm unconvinced about some of the arguments about 'gut inflammation' and as yet haven't seen science bear the theories out. Some people have issues with legumes, peanuts, wheat, etc., and need to avoid them entirely, but I don't think most of us do.

Eliminating bread, pasta, and sweets, at least for a while, is a good way to recalibrate the amount of sugar and processed carbs that you eat, and most of us eat way too much of them.

I'm doing the Whole Life challenge right now which is a modified paleo approach - the 'easy' level that I'm on eliminates bread and pasta, milk and cheese, but allows rice and oatmeal, and yogurt and cottage cheese. Their info might be helpful even if you don't sign up for a challenge.
https://www.wholelifechallenge.com

viva

Veteran

Thanks everyone. It's really helpful to read these different opinions.

Angie, I'm really doing this for DH. I'm not that generous a person (haha) but he has incredible weight struggles (lifelong, family issue) and I want to help him by showing him that I can eat in a restricted way right along with him. I'm actually eating MORE restricted than he is right now, because he has added some bread back in. Ugh.

I do, however, also have a serious control problem with sugar, so I am finding the rigidity helpful around that one thing in particular.

But other than sugar, I don't worry about my diet. It's balanced and I eat pretty well. Occasional grass-fed beef and organic chicken (local when I can get it), fish, and a lot of veg and fruit. There's really nothing whole that I don't eat; it's just frequency that I adjust.

I guess I am wondering -- do I stay with it in order to keep DH going? (Full disclosure: I suffer from the "is everyone happy?" school of parenting/partnering). Maybe I modify slightly, to keep myself satisfied too.

Carter, please chime in with your experience with Whole 30.

Laura: Very interested in your comments re: gut inflammation, which are such a driving force behind Whole 30.

Belladogga: I can really relate. It can be hard to be partnered with someone who eats so differently!

Texstyle: I may have to just make up my own plan, too -- one that tackles my specific issue (sugar).

crazyone

Veteran

I'm a big fan of families sharing meals together, so I don't like the model where partners eat wildly different things (generally found when one of the partners is a very picky eater; even vegetarian/omnivore couples tend to work this divide better in my experience). That said, you and your husband have different genetics and different microbiomes. If something works for you, it may not work for your husband, and conversely, the diet that works best for him may not work for you. Maybe keep making similar things but make your portions of the meat smaller and stretch them out with grains/legumes?

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

I like how you're supporting hubs, Viv (wishing him all the best). And you look like your diet agrees with you, so rock on.

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

If DH is having trouble sticking with it, I wonder if it's the right plan for him? Losing weight and maintaining the loss requires a full on commitment. Would he wear a fitness tracking band? If he likes geeky things, he might get hooked. It can track your estimated calories burned, steps taken, flights of stairs climbed, workout intensity, sleep quality and more - and this can really put perspective on things.

Most adults probably eat about 10-20% more calories than they require each day from all I've read. This definitely leads to weight gain. I don't track everything I eat but I can generalize the calories since I have a pretty good idea of how much is in a slice of bread or a 4 oz serving of meat, etc. I know for me, the main "extra" calories are from "extra" bread or wine. For some people it might be from sweets or dairy.

Do you guys practice the "no eating after 7 pm rule"? I try to stop all eating/drinking except water after 7 pm unless I'm going out to dinner or something.

Sometimes just one change over the long haul can really make a difference. When I stopped wine for a month I lost noticeable belly weight without doing anything else different. For your DH, maybe giving up 1/3 of his normal dinner food portion could be all that it takes for him. Or giving up sugared drinks. Or something else that is approximately 300 calories a day - every 12 or so days equals about a pound lost.

Meredith

Veteran

I haven't done Whole30 but have read about it. It's so incredibly restrictive and I think some of their theories (especially about legumes) are up for debate. Is your husband really going to be jealous if you add quinoa and legumes back into your diet? I wouldn't call those indulgence foods. It seems completely reasonable to make the case that you just can't eat that much meat and need other sources of protein. I did a challenge where I omitted gluten, dairy, refined sugar, alcohol, and caffeine for the month of January. It was restrictive but actually doable and other than occasionally eating bread and sugar, I've been content leaving most of those things out of my diet after the challenge ended (except for special occasions). I think it's great you're supporting your husband and I trust you know his personality well enough to make a choice that works for you and him.

viva

Veteran

Texstyle, thanks for your ideas. He does wear a fitbit, thankfully, and tracks a ton of steps (usually 3x more than me) because he is a teacher and constantly on his feet. I think the best suggestion you have here is the "no eating about 7pm" rule. if I could help him stick to that, I know he'd see a difference. Nighttime is a trap for him.

Helena

Veteran

Viva, I think it's great to do this to support your husband, especially if it's a short period of time. In the longer term, I think you have to make dietary decisions based on YOUR body and needs though. However, it is so helpful for someone trying to limit their diet if the worst offending foods are not sitting there in the cupboard ... it might be worth saving the big indulgences for a night out with your girlfriends, or whatever. Sounds like you are quite a healthy eater so I don't imagine you are causing much temptation anyway!

My husband's weight can fluctuate and when he needs to reign things in, he does the South Beach Diet Because he likes having strict rules to follow. The nice thing about South Beach is that it has different phases - Phase 1 is more extreme, Phase 3 being the more sustainable eating plan for the long-term.. So if he is South Beaching, I will too, but I'll do the Phase 3 version of it. So meals are roughly the same; I just might add a small starch to my plate. Anyways, not a plug for South Beach, but just an idea; maybe you could add items to your diet that aren't major temptations for DH but satisfy your wants and needs a little better.

Anonymous

Shannon and Cheryle - both Winnipeg YLF"rs - did the Whole 30 with their partners, and both were successful in losing weight and changing (at least temporarily, not sure how the long-term has gone for either of them though) eating patterns.

I completely understand your support for your DH and encourage you to continue . As Meredith posed, adding in quinoa and legumes isn't exactly an indulgence and those things are easier to fold into the family meal without upsetting the whole balance. My DH and I usually end up in some twisted competition with each other when we decide to make major dietary changes. We are not above giving each other the side eye when someone makes a questionable choice. Anyways - you're only the two of you in your house, so it should be simple enough to work around it for your own needs.

What I eat and how it affects my body is the single most obsessive thing about me. I agree that the W30 (I have both the original book and a supplementary cookbook) is tough in that the meat is hard to work around (I wasn't prepared to be eating chicken every night of the week instead either) and nuts are hard to work with too. As great a source of fat as they are , they are incredibly high in calories - and I find them hard to digest. Anyways - why am I carrying on here? Because I am at my wit's end myself, and with a sugar addiction I am now afraid of (it's the sugar in wine I believe I am addicted to) .......I think drastic measures are needed, as in not drinking alcohol at all anymore, which i suppose I have my doubts about. I have 20 lbs I'd like to lose but am wondering if it's even possible now. My metabolism has crawled to a stop and menopause kicked my body to the curb.

What's the biggest change for your husband in terms of the W30? The type of food , or the quantity of it?

I think you've motivated me to get out that book and see if i can do this - without eating meat.

Anonymous

My oldest DD did it and lost a good amount of weight.

Sal

Veteran

If you gave up sugar for the 30 days - would this be supportive enough? I tend to think so- but I guess you are making progress through the month and if it is helping him, maybe it is worth sticking at it.

I eat too much sugar too-and have realised that I associate it with love. Our family makes cakes for people for celebrations and sweets for people who are sad etc... So giving it up requires a mindset change. I actually don't want to eliminate - just reduce significantly. And this could mean quitting for a period to recalibrate. I feel nervous at the thought!

Belladogga

Wow. Interesting, Viva, that your husband is a teacher and that night time is a trap for him. Teaching was the stressful job that I left. Like your DH, I was active during the day. However, I often didn't have time to eat so "lunch" didn't happen until 3pm. In the evening, we ate out often because I was too tired to cook. (My SO cooks sometimes but has a limited repertoire.) I would be up late at night planning, prepping and marking and I would be snacking through it all. I had difficulty sleeping through the night and when I woke would eat to help myself fall asleep again.

I've worked as a lawyer and as a teacher. Teaching has its rewards but for me was definitely more stressful than law. If your DH's genetics and history mean he gains weight easily and uses food for comfort I can see that it would be very difficult for him to stick to a restrictive diet like Whole 30. It's hard to find the mental and emotional resources to make any significant dietary changes while dealing with an ongoing stressful situation. Of course, his experience of being a teacher might be very different from mine!

viva

Veteran

Belladogga: do you know my husband?

I think you are right that it is an industry issue. The hours of teaching, the stress (kids, bureaucracy, parents, etc.), always "on," not to mention the poor food that is abundant in the teacher's lounge. Yes -- every single thing that you said is true of him. I think that is why I am really trying to make this sacrifice for him. A big part of me feels that if I cheat I am failing him. It's crazy.

And Lisap: I know that side-eye, too. If I were to cheat with something he craved, I'd get it for sure.

Anonymous

I have read about the Whole30. I am shocked at the absence of grains and legumes. I am not certain how a human being could possibly sustain energy for physical labor and/or mental activity in the absence of grains. It is counter to every thing I learned in school.

I might have gotten over the grain thing (in time), but then I read that legumes are not allowed. What!? C'mon. I adore beans and soy. They are an important source of protein, fiber, and nutrients for me.

I would die.

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

Viva, you could say "only vegetable snacks after 7 pm" so at least celery sticks, cucumber "cookies" (slices) and radishes, etc. could suffice for the later evening snacking. Slicing up a bunch of these every few days and having them ready could keep him satisfied in the evenings.

Helena

Veteran

LOL Sterling ... I had the same thoughts myself

Viva, the Mayo Clinic also has a good diet plan - what reminded me was the bit about snacks, you are allowed to snack day and night if you want, but only on veggies. Sorry, know you're not looking for additional diets!! But it just reminded me

carter

Veteran

Viva, I will PM you instead of replying here.

Mochi

Veteran

I just finished my first Whole 30 this past Friday. I'd say it was pretty successful, though I want to tweak it next time I do it. Successful in that I truly did not cheat, and didn't have a hard time fighting my own fierce sugar addiction. I seemed to resign myself really easily to going through the thirty days without these foods, and it wasn't a big deal. For Sterling, who thinks it would be impossible to go without legumes...it's only thirty days! It is possible.

The reason they say give X up for that amount of time, is in the focus on the re-introduction that starts immediately after the thirty days. That's when different foods we couldn't eat are methodically re-entered back into the diet. Within the program, they want you to gain a sense of which foods are problematic, and I guess there are enough people out there with allergies to soy and beans that they wanted to eliminate these for a month to address that potential allergy.

I found it doable, but I have time to prep vegetables, shop, plan meals, etc. One of my cookbook authors went into detail about spending a lot of her Sundays on shopping and food prep. Maybe that's not your thing. I don't mind it right now.

I was happy to be able to say that I could easily go off sugar. As a disclaimer, I must say that I have bungled the re-introduction phase in that I almost immediately had a couple of sweets, two days in a row. I don't really care about the precision of this phase; I know that I basically should be avoiding sugar and particularly gluten, which gives me weird symptoms. I found out that I don't miss dairy much at all, and I could easily go without grains.

Socializing at other people's homes was a little bit of a hassle, but I got through it unscathed. Maybe long-term this would be more annoying if I wanted to be super-strict (which I am not sure is necessary).

I also find eating a lot more meat to be weird. I had mentioned tweaking my next Whole 30. What I want to do is to eat more fish and chicken and maybe beef once a week. Less sweet potatoes and definitely less fruit (which I used as a crutch due to the sugar cravings). I wasn't eating low-carb at all on this. I also want to be more mindful about eating only till I'm full, or not completely full. In other words, this time around I was all about the elimination of the "problem" foods, particularly sugar. I proved that I could do it. Next time I really want to build better eating habits.

I did lose a little weight though I am not sure how much--I didn't weigh myself. (I would have been much more appreciative to have taken Before pics, rather than have a before weight.) I'm guessing I lost 5-8 pounds; my clothes got slightly looser and for sure I see a difference in my face, though other people have more dramatic results.

I was fairly active during the month. Not the way I would be in summer, but I continued my 2x/week kettlebell classes, and a lot of dancing.

I think it's a good, solid program to shift your relation with food...or at least mine. Incidentally, my husband didn't go on it with me. He ate the foods I cooked, and didn't seem to mind getting the extra meat and not a lot of grains. But at parties he ate desserts, etc. I would be unhappy if I felt I had to continue a regimen (strictly) because of my spouse--if it didn't agree with me.

Mann

I'm a little bit confused about you agonizing about staying on the plan and craving legumes, while your husband is eating bread?

I did my first Whole30 (meaning 30 days of following the strict plan) almost a year ago, and since then, I've added in legumes and quinoa (partly because of cost, but also because I love the taste and I don't feel any "ill effects" from them), and a couple of days a month eating out non-Whole30 restaurants/drinking wine. (I also now do eat occasional sports gels during long training runs or races. There are plenty of other ultrarunners eating paleo style, so I would not at all worry about not having physical energy)
It's my understanding - maybe wrong - that the Whole30 plan attempts to keep out most of the known irritants or allergens (therefore no dairy, gluten, beans etc), but they may not all be relevant to one single person. I started on Whole30 because I was on my wits end about constant gastrointestinal stress and bloating. I stayed following the plan (with modifications) because it got rid of my gastrointestinal problems, and as a side note, I ended up losing ~15 pounds of weight as well, although that has been very gradual. This is also the first time in my adult life that I've been able to control my sugar addiction - I guess I can't do moderation!
My husband took up Whole30 with me, just to support me on it - we did not think it reasonable to have separate meals. He's stayed on the modified plan with me as well.

Anonymous

Ok - I'm convinced. I am starting immediately. I am happy to read these last two success stories - and relate to them really well. Thanks Vivian, for starting this thread.

catgirl

Veteran

Thanks for starting this thread. I CANNOT get my DH on any kind of a diet and he desperately needs to take care of himself - his father and sister (my age!) both died of heart attacks, and others in his extended family have too. He's a traditional American eater - meat and bread/potatoes - while I would be happy with black beans and spinach smoothies. All of this focus here on how to change eating habits is helping me think about how I can introduce palatable changes for him that will also set a good example for DS (who is a pretty healthy eater of salads and fruit but also loves a cheeseburger).

Gaylene

Veteran

Is your husband motivated to stay on the Whole 30 plan? And will he want to continue on a maintenance version once he has shed the weight? If the answer to both those questions is "yes" than I can see why you feel it's important to stick with the restrictions.

My own experience with weight loss is that focusing on dropping pounds is the lesser battle; more important will be how your husband keeps his weight stable under the same conditions that created his weight gain in the first place. What is his "forever" plan going to look like? Will he never eat a cheeseburger again? Will he never snack on anything but celery sticks while sitting at his desk marking a stack of paper until after midnight?

Once I thought of my weight loss as a "forever" plan, I realized most diet plans were far too restrictive for me to envision spending the rest of my exerting my willpower to avoid "temptation". Teaching is hard enough without throwing that kind of burden into the mix.

Kudos to you for supporting your husband by eating with him during his weight-loss period, but maybe you can also help him by starting to plan what his diet will look like for the rest of his life.

Mann

One last comment, since alaskagirl's post above mentioned focus on changing eating habits. I think the desire to radically change my eating habits is the reason why I ultimately embarked on something as "rigid" as Whole30. If I could be very-very moderate about eating sweets and pastries and other refined carbs, and naturally gravitate towards fruits and vegetables, and feel good and not struggle with weight, I would probably never considered it. However, that just wasn't my case. On Whole30, in addition to not having added sugar, since I also can't load up on pasta or rice or bread, and I don't want to eat pounds of meat at a time, I end up daily loading up on vegetables and fruits.
I absolutely know people though, like I'm sure you all do, who can keep a healthy varied diet, be of stable "healthy" weight/body fat and feel good without the crutch of a plan of restrictions. In those cases, I'm not sure if there is much point to Whole30 beyond curiosity.

viva

Veteran

Thanks everyone for your feedback -- and I am so glad this conversation is helpful to some people. So, for my situation, let me just state a couple of things right out.

1. I'm not really sure Whole 30 is right for us. It was on a whim that I suggested it, and mostly as a way for us both to restrict eating so that DH would be more conscious about his food. I don't have any issues with inflammation, irritation, food allergies, or gut problems, which is in part what Whole 30 was designed for. (DH has a lactose sensitivity that is pretty easily avoided, but that is it.)

2. However, it's working, as a restrictive diet -- meaning that DH is really limiting his choices (although does bring a sandwich to school for lunch) and is back going to Weight Watchers at the gym.

3. Part of why it's working is that DH is not seeing me eat anything he is not also eating. He is not tempted, and he is drawing some strength from my commitment.

The ONLY health benefit I am interested in from Whole 30 is help breaking the sugar craving, which has happened. But the thing I am grappling with is how far to let my own desires drive my choices here, when I really want DH to achieve some weight loss? It's really about sacrifice.

I should also say that our best man suffered a massive heart attack two weeks ago. This makes the weight DH needs to lose (and has needed to lose for a long time) all the more important to both of us. It was a huge wakeup.

I don't see the Whole 30 as setting any lifelong eating plan for us. Personally, I believe in variety and moderation in pretty much all aspects of life. But I do feel we needed something to help us become more mindful.

And maybe that is where I have landed. Stick with it, or modify it slightly, but stay mindful. And once the 30 days are up, continue with DH to eat in a mindful way.

Last thing I would add. If you are going to do Whole 30, don't do it like I did. Really read about it, be sure it's right for you, and follow the program.

gradfashionista

(website)

Veteran

If weight loss and health are the ultimate goals for your DH, low carb might be easier than Whole30. There's overlap between the two, but low carb doesn't outright ban grains, soy, or legumes. Craving sugar and craving sweet aren't synonymous, and low carb will help you break the former without sacrificing the latter. I really enjoy my own low-carb sweets, but they don't make me crave "real" sugar. There's a lot you can do with low carb baking mixes, and even if they're not optimally nutritious, they do help a lot of people (particularly men) shed harmful weight.

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