Advice on adopting a kitten or cat (Long)

MsMaven

At one time we had 6 cats and 1 dog. We lived in the hills on a big place and loved them all. (Neighbor's barn cat abandoned her kittens on our roof, we rescued them, fell in love and kept them.) None of the males made it past age 13. The females lived to be 18-19-and almost 21.

We had an 8-year old male when the kittens arrived. He would have nothing to do with them.

When only one old female survived, I adopted two kittens from the shelter, now 13 1/2 years old. Both indoor cats. The female is healthy, lively, playful. The male has had some problems in the last few years. Until now I've never had a male cat live past 12 1/2-13 years. I was sure I was losing him.

I was unhappy with the vet we had, so took him back to our old vet. Now he's getting better, but he has arthritis in his back legs and that slows him down. He doesn't play with the female.

Our city licenses cats and we can have 3 in our home. Months ago when the male was in decline I decided to adopt a kitten, but I'd wait until spring.

We have some construction going on outside. The male is quite upset, so I decided to wait until the workers are finished.

I have doubts. Is it the right thing to adopt a kitten at my age? (Remember my 80th last year? Many of you came to the party!) The male often sleeps cuddled up with one of his kitty toys, but I wonder how he would deal with a lively little kitten. I detect no motherly instinct in the female.

Or I could adopt an older cat. At the shelter there are many cats with physical problems that aren't so serious and could be resolved with some vet care, but the shelter can't do it. If no one adopts them--well-- I'd hate to bring one home and then have to return it because of my cat are distressed.

Any advice? If any of you have brought a kitten to a home with adult cats, how did it work out?

3 years ago

Off Topic

11 replies

Latest reply was from MsMaven

Anonymous

We have a little clowder- the oldest is 15ish, the youngest are 2 1/2, with everything in between. Just cats now, but we've had a few dogs too. In 18 years of marriage, a Lot of pets have come into out life, and a lot have passed.

Some of the cats have close friendships, most tolerate each other, but one of the cats can be a bully. He knows I'm the Alpha though! The house bullies have generally been male, and generally mid-pack in age. The cats that have gotten bullied have been older than the bullies. But then we'll find them sleeping near each other on the bed!

Some of the pets were very easy introductions, like our most recent kittens (now 2 1/2), and FILs dogs (they stay with us when he's been ill). Sometimes a newcomer will hide for a few days, then be totally fine when they come out. It really depends on the personality.

3 years ago

ChrisM

Veteran

In my opinion, the responsible thing to do to think about who would be able to care for your charges if for some reason you are unable to do so.

We decided after our last adoption of a male kitten to rethink adopting babies. They are adorable, but we are in our 60’s and I don’t want risk not being able to properly care for our adoptees. If we ever do adopt again, we would consider an older cat that needs a home. As to lifespan, our cats tend to live about 15-16 years regardless of sex.

3 years ago

Minaminu

Veteran

14 years ago, we rescued a pair of feral kittens from the RSPCA. When Leo passed, we decided not to adopt another cat as his brother Tiger is a proper bully - he's an indoor cat and very territorial. Tiger is still with us - just about as we nearly lost him few months ago. Thankfully the vet has been able to quickly prognose his condition and he's responding well to the meds, however - like you - we started thinking if it would be fair to adopt another cat later on.

As you say, a cat can easily live 13-16 years and in our case, we are planning to change country and lifestyle within the next 5 years and I doubt it would be fair to adopt a cat and then in 5 years time move countries and environment (from indoor living in a small flat to a indoor/outdoor living in a house with garden, hopefully!).

Hopefully this is something that we don't need to worry for the near future, Tiger has mainly good days so far. When he will no longer be with us, we will offer our current space and time as fosterers for shy / feral / hard to adopt cats.

3 years ago

bella

(website)

Veteran

I am very new to cat ownership myself (only a year and a half since we adopted a female kitten), but I came to realize that kittens are very playful. They run around, hide and jump at your feet, can just basically come from nowhere and move in front of you at great speeds. They are very unpredictable and can cause you to fall and god forbid have an accident. This was ok for us, as we have a young kid who likes to keep up with the cat. But, I was hoping to convince my parents, both 75, to adopt a kitten and gave up on the idea for this very reason. Something to consider.

3 years ago

Gingersnap

Active Member

I have 9 year old littermates adopted as kittens and a now 2 year old adopted during early Covid isolation.. I am 70ish. One thought I had in adopting a kitten was that the older pair would pass on when I was about 80, at which time I would not feel comfortable adopting kittens because they would outlive me. So the little one will I hope be my companion well into my 80s. So my answer is no, I would not adopt kittens at age 80. But where I live, there are many mid life cats who do not have special needs, but need homes when their owners can no longer provide them with care or have to move where the cats are not welcome.

3 years ago

MsMaven

Veteran

Thank you all for your thoughtful replies. I've just about concluded that a kitten wouldn't be a great idea. Looking at the photos of the older cats online, I see some that look like they'd be a good match for mine, but watching the cats move around today, I'm not so sure. Maybe if i had just one cat it would be different.

I'm taking the male to see the vet in a week, so I'll ask her advice.

Cats are funny. I have fluffy cat beds sent as gifts--neither cat will go near them. I've bought new cat trees to replace ragged old ones--cats prefer the old ones. I may have a "sale" and ask people to donate to the animal shelter.

I'll wait until I talk to the vet.

3 years ago

Laurie

Veteran

Hi MsMaven, I love that you are a cat lady! I can only speak from the experience of male cats. Our history is: adopted litter mates, who got along nicely. They lived to be 14 and 15, healthy until their last 18 months. When those cats were about 9, a feral kitten wandered onto our patio and we adopted him. All three boys got along well. Bowie is now 8.5, and has always been extremely skittish, though he's mellowed a lot with age. Not wanting him to be an only cat, we adopted a kitten within a few months of the second one's death. Bowie did really well, right from the start. Sadly, we only had Kedi for 2 years as he died very suddenly a year ago March. In June we adopted another 10 week old male kitten, Ralphie, and he and Bowie are also very good buddies.
Our son has a male cat and visits with him every 4 months or so. We adopted the kitten for Danny, and he was with us for a couple of weeks before Danny came from Boston to pick him up - no problem at all with Bowie. And it only takes a few minutes when Ziggy comes to visit for the three of them to adjust to each other. Ziggy lives alone in a tiny apartment, so it's a big adventure to run around our house with friends.

However - a few years ago we brought a neighborhood feral female cat into our home at the end of her long life because she was very sick, and Bowie was not happy. She was only with us for about 6 weeks, and he started to pee on beds! Terrible!! He stopped after she died, and he's never done it again, but I keep waterproof mattress pad covers on all guest beds between visitors! The vet said that it was likely due to her being female, as well as being close to death that caused his behavior.

Since you have both a male and female, I'm not sure what to advise as to the new friend, but I think it would be great, in general, to adopt an adult cat. They are so often overlooked in the shelters, especially during kitten season. At your age - at any age - it's a good idea to have a plan for pet care if you are not able.

Please keep us posted!

3 years ago

Runcarla

Veteran

I’ve had cats and a dog, but have no pets currently. My mother has always been a cat person, though she once had a small dog. She takes in unwanted/abandoned pets and works hard at rehabbing their behaviour. She lost (it died) a cat she had since it was a kitten, about 8 months ago, and took in a mature (9 yo) cat soon afterwards. The new cat is a difficult and prolonged rehab project. It belonged to a man who passed away, and he played rough games with it, so it was aggressive. (My mom is 85.). The cat seemed disturbed by any change in routine or placement of furniture, etc. My mother drugged it for the move to her new apartment in an assisted living place (they approve pets) and it has responded well to the move so far! It has also responded to my mother’s care and attention and has become less combative and more affectionate.

Good luck with your project!

3 years ago

MsMaven

Veteran

Thanks to Laurie and Carla for the additional advice. Yesterday I noticed that Jett, the female, has lost a lot of fur on top of her mid-spine. I've been concerned because she's so skinny now. I'm going to take her in to get checked.

Both cats could be having anxiety because of the outdoor construction, so not a good time to introduce a new cat. I'm going to postpone the adoption until I know they are both all right.

3 years ago

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

I’m sorry, but this made me sad. It almost sounds like you’re afraid the kitten would outlive you, but you’ve still got that great smile and a sharp mind. I just saw this post of someone who has quite a few years on you & thought you might like it.
https://www.instagram.com/reel.....MyMTA2M2Y=

3 years ago

MsMaven

Veteran

Thank you Stag Fast! She is certainly inspirational. Since I started on PT last July for an upper back problem, I've added exercises to make my legs and knees stronger so I can do stairs with ease, strengthening my core muscle so I can bend over with east and come right back up. Ultimate goal get up from floor without using hands.

I did not realize how much strength and agility I gain in such a relatively short time!

I'll still keep looking at kittens. Trying to keep an open mind.

3 years ago

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