A matchy-matchy epiphany - YouLookFab Forum

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A matchy-matchy epiphany

Jenni NZ

Veteran

I have been pondering. It is not very nice weather today so I stayed home and read emails and did washing, boring stuff! I have realised one reason why I had bought so many clothes! When I see the first thing that sings to me, often, I will buy it. This in the past has been without thinking what I have that will work with that lovely new item. I love the item... and then over the next few months or a year I will see something else that is just the same colour or style or has a similar design detail to the first thing. So I buy that too!
I do think I like outfits rather than capsules. But this behaviour has led to the blow-out in wardrobe numbers to almost 200 which is tricky to fit in our house. Here are some pics of what I do. What say you?
1. 2012 purple shoes bought for 2010 purple/silver top. I'm not wearing this top. Don't know why. I have a dress that I do wear the shoes with.
2. 2012 teal shoes. Then I saw the Aztec leggings with the same teal. Then I saw the teal top for only $8. I do wear this outfit with the black merino/acrylic pinafore.
3. 2010 corduroy/lace black skirt. Bought the 2011 red mesh top for this and then the 2013 red/black fascinator. Not wearing this outfit, don't know why.
4. 2012 studded animal print sheer jacket. 2013 Steve Madden gold stud boots. I got excited about the boots partly because I had the jacket, but I've never worn them together. Levels of formality too different? I wear the boots a lot.
5. 2013 tartan ballet flats. Got excited when in late 2013 I saw the jacket on sale. Almost exactly the same! But only worn together twice I think.
Sigh. How can I stop doing this?

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Dressing

22 replies

Latest reply was from Sal

lozz_oz

Veteran

Not sure if these are solutions but rather suggestions.
Limiting your colour palette (maybe 4-5 colours) so that items can be mixed + matched more easily.
Hold up an item that you are considering buying + try to formulate 5 other items that you can wear it with in your existing wardrobe, rather than having to buy extra items in order to complete an outfit.
There will be someone with much better ideas than these.... but its a start!

Anonymous

I can't add a thing to Lozz_Oz's post. She nailed it.

On a side note, I adore matchy - matchy. I just can't seem to pull it off.

Liz

Veteran

There's no getting around the fact that if you want fewer clothes in your closet, you need to start clearing clothes out of your closet and / or bring in fewer items. So figure out what you need to do to walk away from an item in the store, even if it matches something in your closet perfectly.

Do you need to stay out of stores? Do you need a cooling off period before you can buy the new item?

For me, it works best to a) know what "enough" looks like and b) understand why I shop (often we shop for reasons other than real need).

You might ask: How many different outfits do I need for my different activities? When you have enough outfits, your capsule for that activity is complete, and you stop buying. For example, if I have 5 outfits for evenings out; that's my "going out" capsule, and no more buying items to create outfits for it.

Bijou

Veteran

Jenni if you have got to the point where your wardrobe is full then you may want to try the one in, one out policy. I do find that when I think about what item I will cull - it tends to make me focus on how much I need something. Also the $ per wear formula really strikes home for me. If I know something can be worn a lot (such as jeans or boots or items that I can wear to work and then dress up or down for the weekend) then I know that the $ per wear justifies spending money on the item. If the item is something that will be worn infrequently, then I need to either (a) really love it, so I will have it for a long period of time and feel fab in it or (b) it has to be relatively inexpensive to justify the purchase.

Previously, I found that I often bought very similar items, so now I really challenge myself with "how different is this from what I already own" and does it fill a wardrobe hole. I have a lot of black clothing and that is one area that I am attempting to reduce the duplication in my wardrobe. I am currently trying to put these rules into practice and find it can be tricky in practice. You are not the only one who can get carried away when finding a perfect matching piece only to rarely wear it, I am guilty of this too.

Nomad

That's a great epiphany; we all think about our lives and wardrobes and organization/acquisition/aesthetics differently, and once you start to figure your own thought processes out, it becomes much easier to tweak behavior when it's leading to results you aren't happy with.

I like lozz_oz's advice, and Liz's note about figuring out how many outfits you need for each part of your life. Minimalism isn't for everyone (and that's fine!), but I think everyone has a happy medium where they have enough things to stave off boredom but not so much that it's overwhelming... the exact number will just be different for each person.

Being thoughtful and strategic --and occasionally ruthless-- with our closets is tough sometimes, but it pays off... in actual money saved, time saved (both in shopping and in figuring out what the heck to wear in the mornings), and mental energy saved.

Tanya

Veteran

I agree with a lot of what Lozz_ozz and Liz have said. If you like your current wardrobe numbers, another good strategy may be "one in one out", so I would have to decide what old item you are getting rid of to make space for the new one.

unfrumped

Veteran

I can relate. I dometines overduplicated a type of item, so that even if all items make a good capsule, there are more possible combinations than I can wear.
Yet I'll like each item that's just a BIT different ( multiple navy and gray tops!) so I'll have trouble tossing out the old for the new or deciding if one can do the job of 2.

Anonymous

What unfrumped, Lozz-ozz and Liz said. In the past I have culled whole color capsules like browns or burgundy. It also helps to realize that just a couple of pieces in a color may be enough to give variety. You don't need to buy more. What has helped me most is limiting myself to one new purchase a month. I stop and think, do I really want the item enough to stop for the month?

Laura G

Veteran

lozz_ozz about covered it!

I do think finding and wearing your best colors is essential if you want to have a wardrobe and not just a lot of clothes. I *love* color and this one is hard for me. In fact, this very season is the first time I've ever managed it. And I did just as lozz_ozz suggested: tried on each prospective addition with lots of different things I already had, and only kept an item if I could make four or five good outfits with it.

With so many items, I think you'd need a preliminary step of pulling out an arbitrary number (but less than 200!) of favorite things you're actually wearing and making your outfits with those.

If matching shoes to tops is something you want to do, then finding (and sticking to) the colors that look best next to your face could really save you some money. Once you've got those colors, then you'll find each colorful pair of shoes bought to "match" actually works with several of your tops.

JAileen

Veteran

So much good advice!

I really never limited my colors. Then I went grey and most of my khaki/tan/beige items looked awful. I decided to limit my color scheme to grey, blue and olive. I still had things that weren't in these colors, but I wouldn't buy new items in other colors. (I have since lightened up.) But we went on a trip and everything went with everything else. Making an outfit was so easy. I can't emphasize enough how wonderful this was. Maybe your revelation is enough to keep you from falling into your trap.

Jenni NZ

Veteran

Thank you everyone. I've only been realising this reason for a couple of months now- I was initially attracted to the forum by the culling posts, of all things! I still find culling difficult because I think I love the stuff still ( although this is questionable if I'm not wearing it). So I have been trying to wear things and found a small amount to cull that way, but just as often I wear something and decide I still like it. Which means I don't wear something else.
I have been trying already to stay out of stores and did a 3-month shopping fast last summer. I have also got to halfway through this calendar year buying 10 items so far. In 2016 I bought 24 items of clothing and 4 prs shoes so I am doing slightly better. 4 of the 10 so far are direct replacements of culled items but it's still 6 totally new, at least 3 of which are to "match" with items I already have. ( Before I had this epiphany). I will hopefully refer back to the helpful suggestions in this post!

Anonymous

I think buying things that match what's already in your wardrobe is a really good idea. I don't think that is the problem. As Liz said, you have one of two problems:

1. You buy too much and this is a problem on your pocket book.

2. You don't throw enough away, causing storage problems.

Given that you only bought 10 or so items last year, I think the problem is 2.

If the problem is indeed 2, then I recommend giving stuff your kids (who may throw it out or may not...you never know.) You might take a picture of the item if it's really sentimental.

I bought about 24 items last year (that includes tshirts and cheap essentials) but I'm pretty good at getting rid of stuff so my wardrobe is in balance.

bridgie

Veteran

I wish I knew the answer, I buy too many clothes because I like to stay updated. I have too many clothes because I can not bring my self to toss any. I pride myself on what good care I give my clothes and I have so many I do not wear any of them very often, and I really do not have that many places to go to wear them. Blah, blah, blah. Ever hear of catch 22? That is how I live!

Jenni NZ

Veteran

Thank you Bridgie! That made me laugh and feel in good company!
I think Smittie is correct I don't cull enough and hopefully by slowly doing that while not buying more my numbers will slowly decrease

Firecracker (Sharan)

Veteran

I can recognize the impulse to buy Y because it matches X so nicely! Sometimes I go on looking for items to go with X long after X should have been culled from my closet because it wasn't getting worn or because it had become outdated or because it never actually looked that great on me to begin with. Sometimes this happens with something I make; it doesn't turn out to be that fantastic, but I still love the fabric or the idea of the item, and it takes a while for me to let it go. Meanwhile, I'm looking for other items that will make it wearable. So for me, often the impulse to buy Y to go with X is really a case of throwing good money after bad.
I don't know if that's what it is going on in any of your cases, but something to ponder, perhaps.
Your description also makes me think of something that causes me to have a fairly large wardrobe: I love variety. I very much admire the idea of a small, streamlined wardrobe, and I enjoy living with that concept when I go on a trip. But then I'm really happy to get back to my full wardrobe with all of its possibilities. So maybe you are a variety-lover at heart and there is just so far you will go with reducing your wardrobe. Getting it to a place where it makes you happy and not anxious is the key, I think.

skylurker

Veteran

I see nothing wrong in matching things.
The problem IMO lies in "when I see the first thing that sings to me, often I will buy it".
That's what I did in the beginning too. It takes a lot of time to understand what, among the things that sing to you, fits you and your lifestyle.
I think you can speed up the process by reading and trying to implement Angie's blog posts on capsules. And post outfits here asking questions and feedback.

Lyn D.

Veteran

This was an interesting read!
I often find that culling one underperforming piece can lead to other orphan pieces I only wore with it leaving my closet too.
A good way to reduce overall numbers if that is the aim.

Staysfit

Veteran

I am not sure I have a great deal of wisdom to offer here because this has been an ongoing struggle for me, but I find that using a defined color palette has helped. A one in one out policy didn't work well for me. Instead I try to go through my wardrobe seasonally, which means four times a year, to cull items I no longer wear, or that are worn or damaged. I try to be careful that whatever I am adding will work with multiple items unless it is specifically meant for a special occasion. I also follow a strict budget which prevents my overspending and filling the closet too much.

Jenni NZ

Veteran

Thank you all for the wisdom and help. I have found a few more things that may look dated, notably some bootcut black pants and some square toed booties that I may post soon to see about culling.

Jane

Veteran

just looking at this from a different angle...I think that you are saying that you enjoy shopping and the general principle that you enjoy having lovely things in your wardrobe and you like a bargain....

(So sometimes I think I need to go out to a wider variety of events and things to wear all of my wardrobe. I'm studying at the moment which takes up time at the weekend and in the evening, so going out a lot seems a very nice thing to do!!!!

I think it is Joy that needs two or three outfits a day (may be not). But my thought when I read that was I want a life like that with a wardrobe to match! )

But on a more practical level, perhaps a review may be helpful

I love the tartan shoes and jacket by the way. They'd be so cute with blue jeans!

Anonymous

Matchy matchy is you, but I agree winnowing a color palette can reduce numbers if that is what you are after. That and deciding if the new piece fits into what you already have, or if it is worth it to step outside that.

Sal

Veteran

I think it is looking forward rather then looking back. I say keep wear and enjoy your pieces- cull when required but no need to remove them all even if they are worn once a year. But moving forward, it does sound like you have reduced your shopping so you will be not growing your closet size and it might start to slowly decrease.

I have several pieces that I wear infrequently but can't quite get rid of- I am okay with this but am trying to look at the reasons why they only get pulled out 2 or so times a year. Often they are either older pieces that I still like but don't love- or pieces that are hard to layer - in our changeable weather!!