A distilling queston - YouLookFab Forum

Category

Inspiration

Welcome! Read about what to wear and how to wear it on the YLF Blog. Join the YLF Forum to ask specific questions or just chat about fashion and personal style. Or check out the curated list of things we love in YLF Finds.

Outfits Ensembles Trends Advice

A distilling queston

SarahTheWhite

Veteran

Angie's recent post about items and colors that make you happy has gotten me thinking. I was able to come up with a list of things, and that really helped to see my wardrobe in a new light and think harder about what I want to add as time goes. Then yesterday a question was asked on the radio "when do you feel your most beautiful?" The question, combined with the answers from the DJs and listeners (men and women alike) distilled it down even further. That question prompted everyone to divulge only one or two things, and not for the sake of brevity. They just knew exactly what it was. Most of them mentioned hair as one thing, and an item of clothing as another (fresh haircut and a great fitting pair of jeans; newly shaved head with a sports jacket). Others were able to nail down one thing, such as being well-rested. One man even said that one specific day of face stubble growth made him feel fantastic. I just thought it was so interesting. In a world of multiple choices and a broad spectrum of things that make us feel wonderful, I was surprised how easily people could come up with an instant, enthusiastic, and succinct answer. This is me at my very best. I guess we all know that we can't spend our entire lives with the perfect hair growth and wearing that one amazing dress, but I kind of think that the answer to this question could come in handy in situations where we want to feel our best, or in narrowing down overwhelming choices.

My answer - I was paralyzed at first, but took a minute to breathe and imagine the times when I felt the most beautiful, and what came to me was hair completely away from my face, and an open neckline. That's it. So simple... but also kind of mind blowing, (I will neither confirm nor deny whether that revelation is to blame for three new tops that I suddenly had to choose from in my closet this morning...)

Does anyone care to share yours? (And feel free to substitute any word for "beautiful" that fits your needs, as I know that words like "pretty" and "beautiful" don't carry the same connotation for everyone. I enjoyed how seamlessly the men on the radio adapted to the spirit of the question.)

Disclaimer: sorry if this has been covered on another post before. I feel like we have talked a lot about this type of thing, but I can't remember an exact thred like this. So feel free to point me to that one if it's been done before,

43 replies

Latest reply was from SarahTheWhite

Joy

Veteran

Good question to consider. Hair definitely needs to be good. I feel beautiful when wearing pretty underwear sets although they are not seen.

SarahTheWhite

Veteran

I like that, Joy! I think that one of the things I learned from mine and others' answers, was that there were nuances to the answers that no one else would notice - things that were FELT only by the person. And I think everyone instinctively answered the actual question "...FEEL your most beautiful" and didn't internally change it to "...feel that you LOOK your most beautiful."

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

I think for me it is confident rather than beautiful and it definitely happens when I don't have to think about my clothing and hair because I know they are working.

SarahTheWhite

Veteran

That is so great, Jaime! I love the word "confident" and I think it is what I was feeling also as wrapped up in the beautiful. And I think your answer is perfect!

shedev

Veteran

Feeling, ivinsable. Well rested and curls on point. It is as if the stars have aligned in my favor.

SarahTheWhite

Veteran

Thanks such a great description, Shedev! That's the feeling of it, isn't it? I love how specific and individual this is.

Sal

Veteran

It is a fun topic, for me it is hair (chic but relaxed) and shoes (appropriate and stylish). In between does not matter as much...

I could also add in sunglasses are important to me.

For me it is a mix of confident/beautiful/stylish...

SarahTheWhite

Veteran

Oh I like that, Sallie! It seems to me that the hair, shoes and sunglasses are your anchor pieces, and with those in place, everything else just works!

Sal

Veteran

I like it too.

It makes me realise priorities....

I like to have two great pairs of sunnies,I should always do this at the expense of more jeans or similar!!

Kate

Veteran

When I have smooth hair (humidity makes it frizz) that I can run my hands through and have it fall into place, and wool against my skin in winter, or smooth cotton in summer. So texture, apparently! A fascinating question, Sarah; thanks for starting this thread.

Aziraphale

Veteran

This is a super-easy question for me. I feel most attractive (and confident, and relaxed) when I am (a) well-rested and (b) having a good skin and hair day. Clothes don't have a lot to do with it. If I've got nice skin and hair, I could be wearing a gunny sack and I'd still feel fine.

Emily K

(website)

Veteran

I wish that through this exercise I would gain some fashion insight--that would be super handy! But, the times when I feel beautiful are spontaneous moments when I am walking or moving and I observe a fleeting feeling of lightness--feels like energy and coordination and even, maybe, good posture--and I feel attractive at that moment.

Gigi

Veteran

Hair is important to me, but I still struggle to gain control of my hair. I would say I feel my most beautiful when my hair is like I want it and when my outfit is neat and not just thrown together/sloppy.

tulle

Veteran

Love this question, Sarah. We had an unusually warm couple of days recently, and I sat on our deck talking with a visiting friend, absorbing the warmth of the sun. It left me with a light, biscuit-y color and made me realize, as I do each Spring, how much better I look lightly tanned--eyes bluer, hair blonder, teeth whiter. Time to get some light bronzing powder to keep this up! Beyond that, shades of blue, pale fur, necklines that graze my collarbone, sheer white cotton blouses, shoes that add a couple of inches to my height, and soft cashmere sweaters all make me feel beautiful.

cindysmith

Veteran

It's funny, because I like my hair long in the front, but I'm with you on feeling better when it's out of my face (I think that's about the maintenance involved in shirt hairstyles). I also feel my best when I'm in skinnies and a longer loose-ish top; I think that's the best outfit that hides the parts I'm less fond of and highlights the parts I feel better about--without being 'fussy' or 'fidgety'

Interesting question, and the responses are interesting too! Keep 'em coming

Anonymous

1) Hair properly blown-dry, 2) Silk blouse or top - I love the way it feels against my skin, 3) Stable, secure, cute shoes with a 2 to 2-1/2 inch heel.

Goodness, I thought this would be hard, but it was shockingly simple.

Now on to figuring out how to adapt (2) and (3) to my casual lifestyle.

Asta

Member

My first post, yay!

For me it's when my hair is silky straight blow-dried. Not straightened, not curled, just a blow dry.

Also, I like chestage (not boobage) on me. A simple loose-ish cotton shirt cut just low enough with a great pair of jeans.

Thanks for posting this question!

harmonica

Veteran

Fun question! My immediate response said 1) well-rested and 2) fit-and-flare dress in bright colour.

Wow, and l think most of my dresses are shift dresses.

Anonymous

Tulle-I am very much like you, I think.
I feel beautiful in the summer, in a jersey dress, strappy sandals and a tan.

I should buy a jersey dress. My last one died! This has been a really helpful post SarahTW, but also super-enabling!

LaPed

Veteran

Freshly-cut hair and well-behaved skin definitely go a long way.

But even on days when I don't feel I'm at my best, sunglasses and a black jacket can get me almost all the way there.

Anonymous

Coming back to say I totally agree with Sally that it is an excellent way to prioritize.
And STW, it will be interesting to know how well your new tops work out for you: Will they have a higher happiness factor than average?

It's a good thing that I'm at my "most beautiful" wearing things that I can wear daily, at least throughout the summer.

Anonymous

I feel pretty when I wear certain things. But to feel beautiful, I have to feel loved and appreciated. When my kitty is sitting on my lap purring, for example!

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Oh, what a wonderful thread. Thank you for starting it, Sarah. And I have enjoyed all the responses -- we are so individual, you are right!

I had to mull on this one for a minute but as I did it came to me -- I feel most beautiful when I am with Mr. Suz. I should tell him that. I think it might make him feel happy.

I feel most confident, stylish, and myself when I am wearing a high quality. luxe-feeling jacket (ink, navy, or houndstooth), a silk or merino top, and booties.

Bonnie

Veteran

Great question and I had to think because I wanted to consider it in the YLF context. I feel beautiful when I get the proportions of an outfit right and my hair looks good.

The Cat

Veteran

Interesting question and answers. Thank you for sharing!

I feel most beautiful with:
- newly washed and blow-dried hair + a little shine spray
- well-groomed hands and feet (soft and with nail polish, coloured or clear)
- smooth and soft face and body skin
- a light tan
- properly "curled" eyelashes + dark mascara + shiny lipstick or gloss in a visible colour + a light dust of transparent powder (the matte finish subtly highlights the elements of shine elsewhere)
- soft and polished fabrics with a slight sheen

Tulle, I like the way you described your style here and in another post some days ago. Fascinating.

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

An easy one to answer. I feel beautiful, powerful and confident when I'm with my soul mate, Greg. Bonus when he says so - which can be when I'm all dressed up, walking Sam, out with a client, on holiday, or in my lounge clothes. (HIGH FIVING, Suz).

Sarah, I love your simple epiphany. Hang on to it.

SarahTheWhite

Veteran

I am loving all of your wonderful responses! It's really great to hear what brings that feeling to each of you! Hair and/or skin definitely rank up there for most of us.

Thank you Kate, Aziraphale, Gigi, Tulle, Harmonica, Smittie (happy to enable!), Bonnie, and The Cat for your interesting and fun contributions. Your responses are as individual and fascinating as you are!

Emily: I think that your response is really cool. I think I know the feeling you are talking about. It is something like that that I experience when I feel the air on my face with my hair back. I wonder if you took note of the specifics when these moments happen, if you would find any common denominators that would prove interesting regarding hair or clothing...

Cindysmith: we are definitely on the same wavelength! I am with you on the skinniest and tunics as well...

Ryce: I think that you responded to this like I did. The wow, how simple, followed by the revelation that the this could apply to every day life.

Asta: Wecome! I'm so happy this was your first post!! I hope it will be the first of many more. I rally enjoyed your contribution.

Clever trick, La Pedestrienne!

Xtabay, Suz, and Angie: I am feeling kind of jealous that I didn't think of the husband (loved and appreciated) angle! That is perfect, and totally the truth. I do thinking that caring and being cared for gives the best beautiful glow ever.

SarahTheWhite

Veteran

Okay, Smittie... I have to confess, I actually bought 4 tops. The three I was talking about all had an open neckline with a piece of fabric around the neck (no idea what to call this!) and I wore one yesterday, but the fourth I wasn't counting until I wore it today. I realize that it didn't have the sort of neckline I was thinking about, but it had the same feeling when I wore it. I also wore my hair off my face with it, which helped. Here is a photo of both. People instantly responded to yesterday's top. Lots of compliments. Today no one said a word until I got home and my husband loved it. I enjoyed both very much and wasn't effected by the responses at all. Just thought it was interesting...

This post has 1 photo. Photos uploaded by this member are only visible to other logged in members.

If you aren't a member, but would like to participate, please consider signing up. It only takes a minute and we'd love to have you.

Bijou

Veteran

What a fantastic thread. Some days, things just seem to come together, what a bonus that is. When you feel good in your skin, healthy and strong, and your hair and make up is effortless. The perfect ingredients for my confidence outfit - boots (or boot sandals in summer) and the right dress for the occasion. Fit and comfort is important to me, something cannot be uncomfortable (or fussy) and make me feel beautiful.

12