Any experience overhauling Mojos? - YouLookFab Forum

Category

Body Type

Welcome! Read about what to wear and how to wear it on the YLF Blog. Join the YLF Forum to ask specific questions or just chat about fashion and personal style. Or check out the curated list of things we love in YLF Finds.

Outfits Ensembles Trends Advice

Any experience overhauling Mojos?

Sylvie

Member

Well, first post here! I'm in serious need of advice that isn't a quote on Pinterest, or my Mom telling me SHE thinks I'm beautiful.

I'm going through a change. Not "the change," (so sorry for those of you that are. You got this!!) but a change that no one around me seems to be going through. Maybe I've just lost my touch, but I'm putting out these feelers less to hear that I'm normal, and more to get some advice on how I can pull myself out of this blahville trip I've been on.

Side note: my life is full and makes me ecstatically happy to be a part of it every single day. I even have a fulfilling job helping the less fortunate, a Prince Charming and my adorable puppy children.

I've worked so so so so hard to be the woman I am today, and the only thing that seems to be missing after that incredible journey is my mojo!

I'm 26. I know you're rolling your eyes, or about to switch to a different topic now that I've told you I'm 26 and not really feeling myself, but there's more to that. I used to be happy and sure of myself, and going out on the town was fun...not torturous. I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis this year and my body had been wreaking havoc on itself (constant ups and downs with weight). My clothing size changed, but my sense of style changed as well.

What has it changed into? You ask?

I don't freaking know.

I go to the store and can't find anything that interests me until I finally give up and go to goodwill to find some quirky vintage outfit.

Lately, I've been realizing that this quirky vintage glam style tends to be what I gravitate toward, but I CANT PUT AN OUTFIT TOGETHER.

In summation, has this happened to anyone before? Have you ever just lost your mojo? If so, what can I do to build mine back up?

Xoxoxo

Body Type

15 replies

Latest reply was from Stagiaire Fash

Liz

Veteran

Sylvie, in your other post, you indicated that you are drawn to classic styles, that you're wanting to shop in different places and that you're switching from junior's styles to a more grown-up look. Can you tell us more about what kind of look you want?

jill58

Veteran

Hi Sylvie. I'm not rolling my eyes at all. Ulcerative Colitis runs in my family and I'm not surprised you're going through some emotional changes. I think health challenges threaten our sense of self and weight fluctuations just add to a sense of instability. Maybe style just hasn't been a major priority lately and you feel out of practice. It sounds also like your style is changing and you don't have the wardrobe to support those changes yet. If quirky vintage glam is what your gravitating toward it may take some time to develop a style that also works in you current environment. Maybe Instagram and Pinterest would be useful for inspiration. Are there any fashion bloggers whose style you admire? When you go shopping don't give up--the main thing is to go with a very open mind. Try on things that you might not have tried before. It may take awhile to get engaged in the process but participating in YLF is a great first step.

unfrumped

Veteran

No immediate advice but seems very "normally abnormal " to me, for what you're going through.
There are all sorts of non- fashion -related things that might apply but from outfit/ fashion side, I agree with jill58-- be patient, use a sire( don't have to plan to buy there) for outfit try- ones and try to see if there are just one or 2 " silhouettes" or formulas that you feel great in. Think basic option like, long over lean? Dresses vs pants? Waist- comfy or waist- defining? That sort of thing. Things that go with the footwear your feet need? If you get some ideas there, then see what retailer ( or thrift shop) might have that at your price point. Don't aim for a giant wardrobe or for perfection, but a few spirit- boosting outfits.

Momo

Veteran

I am sorry you are feeling like you lost your Mojo. I so get it. I lost mine big time in my 30s and now in my 40s ..baby I am back..maybe even more than back I think I have taken a big leap forward from where I ever was.

The first thing I did was to start spending time looking at blogs to get inspiration ( and now instagram ) . There are so many different types of styles and bodies out there and it felt great for me to see that. Slowly I started to try things, and my biggest advice always is be kind to yourself. Never say anything to yourself you wouldn't say to a good friend.

Good luck! .

Nomad

Yep, sounds normal to me. I think most of us experience a period where something in our tastes or lives or mindsets has shifted, and sometimes it takes us a while to realize that it's happened and figure out how to coalesce around it. Clothing can be an external manifestation of that.

So... who do you want to be, and how do you want to look? Start collecting pictures that match your idea (or at least part of it) of what you want your style to be. Look for characters in movies or TV shows, or real-life people (celebrities, people around your workplace, people at the grocery store...), who you like the look of. (Fictional characters are my favorite sources of inspiration, personally, because they usually have a strong visual identity that makes it easier to pick out themes... I just watched the first season of Jessica Jones, and I love Jessica's style for casual, and Jeri Hogarth's starkly elegant style for business attire). Once you've collected enough visual inspiration, look for common threads... colors, silhouettes, key items, combinations of things you like together.

I'm definitely not an expert on quirky vintage glam, but Zooey Deschanel is the celebrity that comes to my mind for that phrase. A Google Images search for "zooey deschanel fashion" brought back a lot of pictures... maybe see if that gives you a starting point for putting outfits together, if any of them suit your tastes?

anne

Veteran

Sylvie, I want to reiterate everyone's welcome. Stick around and I reckon you will be helped. Lots of empathy here. Some great advice so far!!

Laura1975

Hello Sylvie, welcome!

This has happened to me a few times. The first loss of mojo was definitely around your age. I'm now 41 and going through it again.

I put the first one down to not knowing where to shop. Suddenly fashion shops seemed too young and other shops too old. Here in the uk there seems to be a gap for younger people with disposable income who want to look current and buy good quality but are not looking for high fashion or styles for the more mature figure (what i need now, but that's a whole other thread! ). I don't know where you are but maybe identifying a shop whose overall look (shopfront or website) appeals might be a good place to start?

Laura1975

Ps much sympathy for the ulcerative colitis. My dad is in his seventies and has struggled periodically with it for 20 years or so. Horrible disease.

cindysmith

Veteran

I'm not going to roll my eyes at anyone going through a personal evolution in their 20s. We go through what we go through, and just because it didn't happen to me doesn't mean that it's any less of a valid problem for you.

Beyond that, I don't have any suggestions for you that haven't already been put forth by these wonderful fabbers, so I'll defer to their wisdom. I will say that you're in the right place, as this environment is generally very supportive and welcoming to all (regardless of age, size, shape, gender, or anything else). Welcome, and I'm glad you're here!

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

You've run hard and fast to build your life. Give yourself some time to catch up with yourself. Being in a funk is not a bad thing; feelings are what they are and it's ok to feel them. If the miasma spreads to other parts of your life or is overpowering, don't feel bad about getting help from a therapist or MD.

Are you thinking about clothes for work or play or something else? You might want to start with just one category. The funky vintage things you mention lend themselves to buying one great piece at a time. I know you want to mix and match them in the future; to wear them now, maybe you want to find at least one match for a purchase so you have that outfit, then do another set outfit. Another approach would be to make sure you have enough "background" pieces to go with the funk.

But yeah, breathe!

Bijou

Veteran

It sounds as though you are drawn to statement pieces, and then need the support act to go with them. I also fall into this trap, and so try to buy outfits rather than just a statement piece, or when you buy the statement piece, think of how you want to wear it and whether it fits into your current wardrobe.

Age 26 is a cross roads age - you are a woman now, own it and enjoy this fantastic time.

minimalist

Veteran

There is no eye rolling here; you're in the right place! Also, send your mom my way.

I don't post pictures any more, but: members can be more specifically helpful if you post photos, and everyone is very generous with kind feedback and suggestions.

Angie suggests starting overhauls or updates with hair, specs, bra fitting, and, someone help me out here, I think two more points? I started with loungewear. Only just recently got around to updating eyewear, because I was wearing contacts 99% of the time. Wish I'd gotten new frames years ago; trust Angie's advice!

I have a few funky statement pieces; they work well because the essentials are in place, so I can pull on an outfit that works without much thought, and then add something bold or switch out a plain element for something more fun. Maybe start by looking at the articles on essentials? Everyone has a different list; you might find some inspiration in the detailed work many members have shared about their own wardrobes.

JuniperGreen

Veteran

Hi Sylvie! I definitely sympathize with your plight. Health issues can throw a wrench in all the best laid plans.

I had hip surgery last spring and am only just now realizing the impact it had on my sense of style and how I presented myself to the world. I got really stressed about feeling so out of control with how my body felt, and the many compromises I seemed to have to be making.

But coming to this forum helped me out of my rut. Angie has such a wealth of information about this very topic - I've really enjoyed getting lost in the archives I think the link below is a fabulous place to start and breaks out some easy, bite-size steps to get started.

https://youlookfab.com/2015/12.....style-rut/

minimalist

Veteran

Oh, and always put sunblock on your upper chest and on the backs of your hands, if you don't do that already.

Stagiaire Fash

Veteran

I want to add that I'm new around here too. You seem to know more about style and fashion than I do. I think you can start posting photos on your third day. They don't have to be professional quality--look at the WIWs and you'll see people standing in front of their mirrors with cell phones, nothing to be intimidated about doing.

What people are telling you about this being a supportive, helpful group is true. I believe this is intentional and that they have done things specifically to shape this kind of community. Several times in the few weeks since I joined, I've been floored by how perceptive and kind various people here have been. (Obviously, not everyone connects with everyone, but overall, the percentage of people who seem to care and to "get" me here is very high.) If you want examples, click over to my blog on the lookfab.com site--skip my long, wordy entries, but go to the comments and look at the love. And look at the comments long-time members make to each other--they know each other and say things like "you could do this at your x meeting" or "this would go well with y thing in your closet".

This site has a wealth of information and might be more complex than you realize. The web designer, Greg, is Angie's husband so it is technically very well done. For example, have you discovered the "advice" section of Angie's blog, or that if you click on the folder on her blog, you get archives from the decade since it began? Finds are another cool thing. They just this week replied to a forum question with the link to the basic explanation of how finds work.

Minimalist, " hair, specs, bra fitting" are the only basic starters I've come across so far. I've got 2 out of 3 done. My health care is a mess, but I might just pay up front for a visit to the eye doc to find out if I get glasses or RK.