What's Your Internal Running Commentary? - YouLookFab Forum

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What's Your Internal Running Commentary?

mamaKate

Veteran

Within another thread, I just had a hilarious exchange with Helen where we each shared the internal commentary that goes through our minds when trying to decide whether to keep or purge an item. It was so funny I thought I'd start a separate thread.

How does your internal commentary usually go?

Here's mine:
-But I just got it 2 months ago!
-but it gaps around your bust and your co-workers can see your bra.
-But I've gotten compliments on it!
-but the zipper bulges out in a weird way.
-But it's really comfortable and forgiving!
-but the material is cheap.
-But the gray color goes with anything!
-but the gray color does nothing for you.
...and so on.

Here's Helen's :
(hoping you don't mind, Helen, since you already posted it!)
"Time to send this one away!"
"Nooo - not the top I wore to the Sarah McLachlin concert 10 years ago! That is sentimental!"
"You can't even get one arm in it anymore. It is ripped in three places."
"I can fix it."
"After a decade, you now decide to fix it? And how? Using Krazy glue?"
"Oh, just put it in the "still deciding" pile!"
(The Still Deciding pile is enormous! )

General

46 replies

Latest reply was from goldenpig

Anonymous

Too funny! Yes, I enjoyed reading that. Mine goes like this:

"I really should get rid of that black fur-collared shrug. It's a bit "dowager" looking."

"But you just got it this past summer! It's been sitting here for six months just waiting for the holidays!"

"I know. I think I'm sick of looking at it."

"But you've only worn it once and It was $3.99. Think of CPW!"

"Yeah, and I felt like a doofus. Remember seeing the pictures after?"

"But it's so classic and elegant. Maybe you just don't have the right pieces to style it with."

"Ok, so now I'm going to throw good money after bad?"

"There is NOTHING wrong with it. It's like brand new, it's Ann Taylor! It's CLASSIC."

"Yeah, but it's really dressy, and I feel like it's the *old me". I want to be more casual."

"So style it with casual pieces, Shake things up a bit!"

"Oh okay. I'll try and post a few options on YLF and see what the girls think."

HelenInCanada

Veteran

Brilliant thread, MamaKate! Thank you for the huge smile I have right now. These "multiple personality" moments can be tricky to handle!

I think the war within arises when those of us who are a little more idealistic or sentimental by nature have to let the more practical side out, and a battle ensues! Intellectually, we know what makes sense and is needed for our wardrobes, but emotionally we have such a hard time letting go - or we can imagine a plethora of possible places/occasions that may materialize to justify hanging on. Oh, I sympathize with those "What Not To Wear" victims!

rae

(website)

Veteran

Hee! I love these! These dialogues sound very familiar. Here's me:

"Ag! I hate how this looks on me!"
"But everyone loves it..."
"What do they know?"
"But WE love it! It's CUTE!"
""But I look like a hippo."
"You can't get rid of it!"
"Why??"
"It's not a brand name, so you can't even sell it on Ebay! It'll be a complete loss..."
"I feel like a bigger loser wearing it."
"You'll lose that 20 pounds eventually, don't you think? You weighed that much just 10 years ago. How about keeping it as inspiration?"
"Hm. I do want to lose weight... huff huff huff..."
"What are you doing?"
"Leg lifts."
"Now?"
"Yeah."
"Ugh. So we're keeping it?"
"Sure."
"Awesome... so what will we wear it with?"
"Huh? Huff huff huff..."
"With the top? How about this jacket?"
"The necklines compete."
"Well how about this skirt?"
"It won't stay tucked into that skirt."
"Well how about with a nice cardigan?"
"We don't have any cardigans."
"MMM... we should buy some cardigans."
"Huff huff huff..."
"Would you stop that? I'm hungry."
"Look, either we starve and buy boring cardigans, or we toss it, eat like normal people, and buy boots instead."
"Sigh. I do love boots."
"Well?"
"Fine. Get that thing out of here, and get me a pizza."

Anonymous

Oh, Rae! That was hilarious!

mamaKate

Veteran

ROTF, Rae! You made my day!

Sona

Veteran

can I afford it?
NO?
Do I need it?
NO, So WHAT?
I LOVE IT....

must buy....

hubby thinksI'm a spendthrift....

I think I'm a spendthrift.....

but they are so on trend...
and they FIT!!

Mo

(website)

Veteran

Ha! Mine are more like:

"do you actually wear it?"
no but it was a deal and so it has great CPW even though it only came out to play twice

"It's too tight"
yeah, but it was designer for only $22! And it looks great on. So what if I can't breathe when I sit down. yeah, it's been hanging unworn for 3 years but I know the perfect occasion will come around. Besides, I spent $20 trying to alter it to not squeeze me to death.

"you have beautiful clothes you don't wear - why are you looking for more?"
Oh, those are *too* good to just wear without having somewhere special to go. I need to buy something I can casually bum around the house in but still be presentable if I find I have to run an errand.

Amy

(website)

Veteran

hee hee, Rae, that whole scenario sounds very familiar. Pizza and boots is a better choice, for sure!

Suz

(website)

Veteran

These are hilarious!!

I have a whole bunch of running commentaries. One goes like this:

"You know, the perfect Parisian Chic capsule wardrobe of your dreams exists and it is within your reach, if only you get rid of all this junk you have hanging around here."

"But wait a minute. Most of this is new and actually isn't junk at all."

"Most of it is thrifted. Honestly...just look at these layering Ts...you think these FIT? Ines would be appalled."

"But Ines looks good in soul-sucking beige! Why should I listen to her?"

"Tut tut....How do you expect this jacket to work with anything? What were you thinking? By the way, Ines would NEVER never never wear that THING...what do you call it?"

<blushing> "Oh...you mean the hitch skirt that I haven't even worn yet?"

"Yes. That ridiculous item that can't be worn out of doors due to the fact that you do not have a coat to go with it."

"But I just bought it. And had it altered!"

"You bought it on SALE, didn't you. Ha! Caught you. What were you doing, stalking the sale racks when what you needed was good, basic pieces, not some ridiculous STEAMPUNK thing...."

"A girl can't live by basics alone! Not even this girl!"

"INES does!"

"But she's–"

"Stylish, and you're not. Listen. Do us a favour. Chuck it. Just chuck the LOT of it and buy EVERYTHING new."

"HUNH???? What universe are you living in? How would I afford it?"

"Never mind that. Just get those garbage bags, right now!"

catgirl

Veteran

Here's mine:

"OMG, this looked KILLER on [insert your name here]! I must have it now!"
"But so-and-so is a tall hourglass, and you're a squat inverted triangle. Also, that color makes you look like a jaundiced jellyfish."
"Who cares? I can make it work, really!"
"How, pray tell?"
"I'll lose 15 pounds and take growth hormones! I'll live underground for two months to get that English rose skin!"
"That's the worst plan ever. And haven't we been through this before?"
"Oh, come ON. Pleeeeze? Pretty please?"
*eye roll* "Whatever."

(time goes by)

Ten months later:

"What the hell is this item, and why on earth did you let me buy it? What kind of alter ego are you anyway?"

Repeat as necessary.

anne

Veteran

This is the funniest thread for ages. Loving it!!

Suz please don't give up on the hitch skirt yet - can't you save it for mild weather when you don't need a jacket?

rae

(website)

Veteran

THESE I could see as part of a fashion book - so funny! "The Wardrobe Monologues," coming soon to a book store near you...

And Suz, you need to wear that hitch skirt!!

Aziraphale

Veteran

OMG this is the best thing I've read all day. More, more! My internal monologues aren't nearly as funny. I don't have much left to purge, for one thing. And I'm in a wardrobe holding pattern right now because my lower belly is still a bit swollen and probably will stay that way for a few months, and I don't know if my new shape will be different than my pre-op one, or by how much. So I really can't buy anything new (well, except footwear...), or even get rid of stuff I currently have.

One thing is different, though, and it fills me with hope of good things to come. I was checking out my scar for the first time the other day (the steri strips have finally fallen off), and I thought my waist looked smaller. Curiosity got the better of me and I got out a measuring tape. I've lost an inch from my waist! I guess that giant melon of a fibroid was pushing my guts up and out of place. Woohoo!

Barbara

Veteran

This is the funniest post I have read in a while!
The only thing running through my head like a loop tape is: do I feel great wearing this? The answer must be yes or I walk away. Works every time.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Barbara, you are a genius. Yours is the loop I want to play again and again.

Elisabeth, YAY for the waist reduction!! So glad for you.

Mochi

Veteran

"Ines looks great in soul-sucking beige"

LMAO

Okay, all of youse. We are all working on a group novel here. You're much more astute and funny than any of the chick-lit that's out there.

I, funnily enough, don't have this kind of existential crisis around purging anything. And I mean, an item I've barely (or not at all) worn. I guess I'm used to editing words I slaved over, so what's an item of clothing? (I guess it helps that I haven't bought anything too pricey up till very recently.) Here's my internal dialogue:

"Ya know, I haven't even had a chance to wear those Fluevogs yet and already I'm regretting their purchase."

"They're cute!"

"Yeah, the straps are...but those rounded toeboxes...what was I thinking!"

"Oh well. I guess your style evolution curve is getting sharper and quicker! (Not quick enough, unfortunately.) You're going to wear them anyway, right?"

"Of course. I paid XXXXX for them! Plus they're mostly cute. Just next time, no more Minnie Mouse Fluevogs, capisce?"

"Yeah, yeah...."

"You should have gotten those wardrobe goofs out of your system way back in your twenties..."

"Okay, FINE."

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Oh, Mochi - I HAVE THOSE FLUEVOGS, TOO!!!!

And I had the same internal dialogue about them. I was just saying to Sarah that they do not go with any bottoms I own.

Anonymous

Too funny. I can now just see Rae huffin' and puffin' maybe even with a slice of pizza, and Suz is sneaking around the sales rack (dark glasses, trench and a hat)!

Me.......it's going on now, because I've been trying to purge all month, (must get ready for Canadian boxing day, even though I am not Canadian.)

You haven't worn that in 3 years...but it'll be perfect when we move to ....(somewhere other than here)
It's just taking up space, fine keep it. What about this, you know it is too big for you.
Yes it is but I'll never find anything like it, I'll alter it.
You say you will but you won't do it, your altering pile is taking up half the closet.
This you can't argue has to go. It's completely worn out.... but If I get rid of that I'll have NOTHING TO WEAR!

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

YOU ARE ALL THE BEST!!! This has been one hilarious read and I thank you! Am i going to share my running monologue??? Not on your life - it makes me sound like a complete lunatic!!!

Mochi

Veteran

Now you MUST share, Transcona. How does this online peer pressure thing work?

(Suz! Was it these?

http://www.fluevog.com/code/?w.....ourID=2067

Because a lot of these Fluevogs have that same toe. And I think it's more rounded than it looks in the pic. I'll still wear them, just thinking that it's not a purchase I can back up the same way I'm doing with my other stuff.)

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Mochi, these are mine: http://getfunky.ca/components/.....29fa45.jpg

I actually really love them. They are super comfortable. They are a lovely soft colour. It's just that I cannot wear them in winter with dark tights/skirts! And somehow did not take that in when I bought them. Sigh.

I think they will look good in summer. But in the meantime, I don't have cool shoes for winter.

Aziraphale

Veteran

Suz, I have those too! Mine are black with cream straps. I love love love them. Wear 'em as often as I can! They're a bit dressy for my everyday look though. And they're attention-grabbing, so I don't wear them if I want to blend into the background.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Wow, that's neat, Elisabeth! So glad you like yours.

I am hoping I'll get lots of wear from mine when the season changes. They are a bit dressy for me, too, but one nice thing about this colour is that they do look good with jeans. Of course I only realized after the fact that they were on sale in the fall because they were "spring" season shoes. The colour theoretically would look good with fall/winter clothes, but that would only be if I could find tights/ bottoms that harmonized.

velvetychocolate

Veteran

While I haven't actually started on my closet editing, I *am* looking at the contents with new eyes. In fact, I've taken the doors off my closet so I can see what's in there.

My running commentary?

"What were you thinking? Did you think that buying a fuschia and black patterned wrap dress was the way to inject some oomph into your style? Get rid of it ASAP"

"I paid XXX for these beautiful boots, but they are a bit too small...I didn't return them quickly enough...what to do...with a semi-expensive pair of brand new boots?"

"Hmm...I bought this to make my Mom happy - she likes me in very classic clothes - but I still haven't worn this brown tweed blazer. It's brand new and I'm realizing I don't even like brown that much? What to do ....it's a nice blazer, it fits ok. Maybe I should make myself wear it?"

"WOW - it's Grandma's vintage crystal necklace. I have nothing to wear it with, but I love it - definitely keeping this."

"You have more shoes than clothes...you realize this don't you?"

"You also have more lipstick than clothes..."

"You have more perfume than clothes..."

"You have more jewelry than clothes..."

"Why are you hanging onto that coat? I know it's the most expensive thing you've ever bought and the most beautiful coat you've ever owned, but it's at least two sizes too big for you now...."

"I really need to stop shopping at Kohls"

"What the heck? The best things you have are for a life you don't have...what's going on here?"

"Lime green? Are you kidding me? Just because it looks fresh and new on someone else, does not mean it's for me..."

"I'm so confused...my closet has a split personality...silk blouses, beautiful skirts, mixed in with the latest trendy thing from a discount store..."

"Maybe you're not trying hard enough? You know you can make that animal print cardigan work if you tried..."

"I don't like cardigans...why do I have so many of them?"

"I don't like this denim skirt either...even though it was supposed to be a wardrobe basic..."

"If I see another animal print anything, I'm going to scream..."

HelenInCanada

Veteran

These are all so entertaining to read! And much fodder for the lay psychologists here - kidding!

I hope this isn't hijacking too much, but I wanted to pipe in to ask Velvetychocolate (mmm!) about something in her commentary - Is Kohl's a "bad quality" store, or did you mean you spend too much when you go there...? Just curious, because we don't have Kohl's here. I often see ads for it online and on television (the US channels) and the clothes look good to me!. I understand J Lo herself has a line there. (Not that that's necessarily an endorsement...lol.) Don't know anyone who has personally shopped there. I'd be curious to poke around the next time I cross the border. Would love a heads up! Thanks!

Janet

(website)

Veteran

"You need to do something about that top."
"Hmmm?"
"Don't pretend you don't see it. The green one you haven't worn in over two years."
"Yeah, I see it. I like it, but..."
"But?"
"Well, it requires a strapless bra. And it was voluminous when I got it, and now it's even more voluminous."
"You could get it taken in, maybe?"
"Maybe..."
"It was expensive, wasn't it?"
"Yeah, but it's Catherine Malandrino."
"So why don't you wear it?"
"Because it's winter now and it's a sleeveless top that doesn't look good underneath anything."
"But you didn't wear it this summer either."
"So what's your point?"
"So why are you keeping it again?"
"Oh look...a dust bunny!"

velvetychocolate

Veteran

HeleninCanada - Kohl's is a pretty great store - very inexpensive, and you can get some wonderful things there. The reason I said I needed to stop shopping there is because the prices are so good that I tend to buy all kinds of things without really thinking. There is nothing wrong with Kohl's - really low prices, and although it's not super high quality, it isn't bad either. What usually ends up happening to me is that I buy a whole bunch of stuff there because the prices are so good, without thinking about whether the things I'm buying will work with the things I already have, and without even thinking about whether the things I'm buying are even "my style" (even though I don't know what that is yet.). It's like, "Wow...this looks just like that other thing I saw at Nordstrom or Ann Taylor and it's only $15" and so on.

I've taken my Canadian relatives there when they've visited, and they have *also* succumbed to buying bags and bags of stuff.

It's just that Kohl's has really low prices and I buy too much "stuff" there without really thinking. Does that make sense?

annagybe

(website)

Veteran

"It'd be perfect for a night out.'
Except with my work schedule I don't often have a night out.
Some of my more outlandish outfits have graced the aisles of Trader Joe's.

HelenInCanada

Veteran

Ah, I got it, velvetychocolate. I'm picturing nice knock-offs of trendy and/or designer items, and very tempting prices! I kind of assumed it was like Target, but with higher-end labels. Thanks for the explanation. Sounds like a fun but dangerous place to shop!

*Returns thread to internal commentaries* Back to enjoying!

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