My love/hate relationship with ballet flats - YouLookFab Forum

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My love/hate relationship with ballet flats

Astrid

Veteran

I'm a fan of flats, I just don't wear heels. I can do a very small one if the shoes are comfortable, but I prefer to wear flat shoes. Of course ballet flats are a big part of the flat shoe range out there, they are everywhere. And I had quite a few of them over time. After all, they are flat shoes that are practical for warmer weather and go with all kinds of bottoms, right? I really want to love them.

The thing is no pair of my ballet flats ever became a wardrobe workhorse. The just don't stay on my feet sometimes or they have to be quite snug and are therefore uncomfortable after a while. They mostly work when I have bare feet - but add tights or hose to the mix and I'm constantly in fear of loosing my shoes. Not practical. I think I have to stop buying them.

I know that there are others on the forum who can't wear them. What do you wear instead? Do you find yourself missing something?

Dressing

37 replies

Latest reply was from Irene

harmonica

Veteran

Thanks for this post Astrid. I have this problem too. And I see ballet flats everywhere. I have one pair from Ballasox in that is very comfy. I have tried another brand too that was great, but I can't remember the name. It was a US brand and selebs were wearing it. I'll probably remember it after some days - lol

ETA: Yosi Samra it was. They were comfy, soft and stayed put. http://www.yosisamra.com/

Loafers can be an alternative. I like mine, but they too turned out a bit loose to. They were great when I tried them in store, but after some days wear I noticed that they too seem to fall off. I'll try some insoles or something.

Astrid

Veteran

Thanks Harmonica! Both brands were unknown to me. I know the problem of shoes getting wider over time, the ballet flats I got for the wedding do it too. The first two hours are fine, but then they give quite a bit. I guess some with straps would work, like Mary-Janes, but I'm not sure I could see myself in those styles.

amiable

Veteran

I once had a pair of ballet flats with ankle straps, and I loved them. I wish I had another pair, but they seem really rare to come across.

And I've recently discovered espadrille's, and am enjoying them for casual wear.

Eliza

Veteran

Ballet flats rarely work for me either. I walk out of the heels and the ends of my toes often feel cramped. Once I size up, there is too much room in the heel.

I have found that the now popular slipper style works much more often for me, as do oxfords and some loafers. I am picky about loafers as I prefer them to be a bit edgy and they rarely are. Boat shoes are another alternative.

Astrid

Veteran

Thanks Amiable. Yes, I'd love something like this http://pinterest.com/pin/177047829072355861/, but I haven't seen similar ones either. I've never had espadrilles, so not sure if I could wear them. Fit is a big problem with my feet.

Thanks Eliza! I haven't tried loafers or slippers yet, but I love oxfords! I can't wear them when it's really warm though. Boat shoes aren't really my style.

ManidipaM

Veteran

Yeah, tell me about this! For reasons I can't fathom, my crochet ballet flats were the only ones without issues... but still no workhorse as they were too dainty and fragile for most terrains.

Loafers and moccasins work much better for me... and that's it for slip-on flats. Maybe slipper flats will work? Higher vamp so need not be tightly fitted to stay on...

Astrid

Veteran

Thanks Manidipa! Yes, I think a higher vamp is necessary - that's the crux of the matter.

Karie

(website)

Veteran

I love ballet flats! Oddly enough, the cheaper the ballet flat, the better they fit me. I always wear shoe supports with them - it helps to keep my feet comfy and supported, and it helps with fit, too.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

I just stopped trying to wear flats unless they have laces or are booties. That's my solution. I gave into the fact that flats are ten times more uncomfortable to me than anything with a small wedge or heel. That's the reality. A shoe that will not stay on is not comfortable.

Even slipper flats come off of my feet, although I'd do better with those. Oxfords have some potential for me because the laces help to hold them on -- but not the completely flat kind -- they have to have a 3/4 inch heel or so, and then they will be fine.

My personal heel "sweet spot" is about 1.5 inches to 2.5 inches. I can go as low as 3/4" with the right shoe or boot. And as high as 3" with the right one. But lower or higher spell discomfort.

In summer I wear sandals with a wedge -- this solves the problem. Straps plus a teensy bit of height, and I'm more comfy. (By the way, even my flattest sandals cause the same problem for me at the moment...as Mochi and Zapotee can attest -- they watched me flipping out of those in NYC. Grrr!)

By the way, I can't wear heeled pumps or low vamp shoes either, unless they have elastic to keep them on. I am sure there may be a pair or two out there in the world that would stay on, but the only one I've ever found is from Ecco. And it's the only one of theirs that has worked. (Believe me, I try them as they come out every year, hoping against hope...)

I do have one pair of almost flat lower vamp shoes that work pretty well for me. They're a very small wedge 9 West. I have no idea why these ones work better than others I have tried, but on the whole, they stay on, and the wedge means they are not as hard on my feet as those without it.

ETA: I realized after I wrote this that one reason a higher vamped flat is difficult for me personally is that with high arches they can easily be poorly fitting on me. A shoe with laces helps that problem.

Mary Beth (formerly LBD)

(website)

Veteran

Ballet flats used to be my workhorses - but I'm kind of over them. I have blown through so many pairs that fell to pieces pretty quickly (seriously, Steve Madden, $88, and at the 10-day mark the heels were worn down).

Round toe ones tend to pop off my foot, but I found that the ones that had more of a pointe-shoe shape, really stayed put. I wish those were still around. I have a very narrow heel, but if the toe box area fits properly, my foot doesn't slide forward, and the shoe stays on.

I like Bloch and Repetto for ballet flats, they seem to last, and are pretty comfortable if the toe area is fitted right. I sometimes hunt around eBay to see what's out there.

Diana

Veteran

I wore ballet flats for a couple of years right when they first became trendy. Notably, this was before i developed plantar fasciitis. Nowadays I don't wear them at all. I realized that there's a whole host of things that make them not work for me:
--too flat, no arch support, generally can't fit an orthotic. I prefer a little heel lift, 3/4" or so. Post-plantar fasciitis, this is really important.
--falls off my feet since I have narrow heels. Nothing has ever fixed this problem. This also means I clench my toes in weird ways when I walk to keep the shoes from falling off, which is uncomfortable and leads to a screwy gait. The ones with elastic either cut up my heels or still don't stay on.
--many pairs cut right across my bunion. Ouch.
--can't wear socks (I've never found secret socks low enough for ballet flats), which always results in toe rubbing and blisters.

Anyway, I wear oxfords instead these days. Tried Mary Jane styles or cuffed ballet flats for a spell but they still had the bunion and no-socks problem. The only <.5" heels I own are my two pairs of born arlettas (ok arch support,and fits orthotic) and 2 pairs of flat naot sandals (cork footbed, lots of arch support).

JennyAnne

(website)

Veteran

I really like ballet flats, but I know many women who don't. If they don't stay on for you, it sounds like some of the new flat styles are worth a try - loafers and oxfords and stuff.

Caro in Oz

Veteran

I can't wear them either I'm hoping this year that with all the fab ankle strap shoes around I may find a couple of pairs that will work.

Nebraskim

Veteran

I read on another site a piece recently about how ballet flats are so deceptive; they look as if they would be comfortable but because of their flatness, total lack of structure and support and the low vamp requiring one to clench her toes to keep them on, they are actually worse for your feet than el cheapo flip flops. I have never enjoyed them but I know many who do. i have had plantar fasciitis off and on for 25 years. It's always there in the background and can easily flare in literally just a couple of hours in the wrong shoes. And ballet flats, for me, are the wrong shoes. I need a stiff sole, so for me, as unattractive as they are, Sanita or Dansko clogs or sandals are my shoes of choice.

Anonymous

Diana and Suz perfectly described my problems with ballet flats. I'm glad to know there are a few of us because nobody in real life seems to understand that they just.don't.work for me. I haven't found a go-to alternative yet, but for fall, I'm pretty jazzed about all the slipper flats coming out. I'm thinking the higher vamp might make them doable. I've had some success with the Sperry Bluefish (also higher-vamped) boat shoes and hope to find a killer pair of oxfords this fall.

Vix

Veteran

Hi Astrid --

I just have a hate-hate relationship with them for all the many comfort/function reasons listed above.

[Plus I have a wider foot and find I need more V shapes in my shoes to be remotely happy with the flattery angle.]

I've seen some flat(ter) shoes that have a ballet shoe look and then a single, wider diagonal strap across them. Can't recall for sure, but the Fidji brand may do that look a fair amount. I actually prefer that style to a Mary Jane -- though I've worn heeled MJs for functionality. The elastic-heeled ballet flats already mentioned are another possible solution for you.

Susie

Veteran

I know you aren't in the US, but while browsing yesterday I noticed several styles of ballet shoes/flats (more with pointy toes than the classic round toe) that had ankle straps too. I would think the strap would help them stay on.

I'm not a fan of ballet flats because I've just never liked how they look on my foot. I have one pair, in pewter with a buckle, that actually look and are comfortable.

Flats SEEM like they should be easy and comfy but I think lots of us realize that they aren't.

Transcona Shannon

Veteran

I struggle with true ballet flats too Astrid. The only pair I have that stay on my feet have a fairly high vamp so that's how they stay on. Otherwise I wear a tiny heel or flat oxfords.

Anonymous

I have only ever had one pair of ballet flats in my life, I wore them about 3 times then sold them on Ebay. I don't miss them at all. Though I do wear heels of all heights up to 2 3/4". In flats I have oxfords or cage sandals or Cons. I have noticed a few styles coming out now where they are a ballet flat with an ankle strap, I think they look nice.

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

I just received these and they felt comfortable immediately. I'd been trying various flats all summer. I guess these aren't completely flat and that's why they feel better. Taos makes a few other similar style flats as well so it's worth a look if you can get them in your area.

http://www.zappos.com/taos-foo.....st=fcl%3A0

Edit: I think they also look better on than in the photos online.

shedev

Veteran

Suz and Diana summed it up for me too, I have a narrow heel that slips out of all slip on flat shoes. This includes loafers and smoking slippers. I also wear an insert. I wear boots and booties, oxfords, sassy sneaks, and comfort sandals most of the time.

AviaMariah

Veteran

I can't wear ballet flats because they usually rub on my big toe joint and don't have good support. But I am loving the slipper flats that are out right now.

Aziraphale

Veteran

Hi Astrid. I don't wear ballet flats either, although for me it's more of a style issue, in that I just don't think they are my style. I love footwear, but I never buy a pair of shoes I'm not in love with. I have yet to fall in love with a pair of ballet flats. I always put them on and think "meh". This might be because they don't do much for my body shape (they don't), or because I'm just not attracted to that particular shape of shoe.

So for giving advice about how to keep your ballet flats on, I'm no help at all. But I do like and wear other flats. How about Converse? I prefer the unisex Chuck Taylors, but more feminine versions are available. Oxfords are very appealing, too -- both the laced and laceless versions, pointy or round toe. Or how about slipper flats? Lots of people are hopping on the slipper flat bandwagon right now, and they seem like they'd stay on your feet better than ballets. Also, what about flat maryjanes? The pointy-toed ones, reminiscent of the mid-1980s, are good if you're looking for something less "sweet".

I also wear flat boots, both tall and short. The ones in my closet that get the most wear are these. They look a bit like refined work boots:

http://www.fluevog.com/code/?w.....ourID=3479

rachylou

Veteran

The reason I don't like ballet flats so much is that you can feel the ground right through them. The worst is when they are constructed just like ballet shoes, with an undersized sole. Sometimes I feel tough and can do it, sometimes I can't. I prefer a "flat" with a substantial sole and maybe a 1/2" heel, which to me are "court shoes." I will say I am really liking my Chinese Laundry D'Orsay flats. They have a bit more sole to them.

Also, I'm starting to find them too girlish, even on the very young.

Thistle

Veteran

I am with you!!

I want to love ballet flats, but I don't. Most just aren't comfortable. I know others love them, so I will set up camp with you! They don't stay put, I agree, and my foot has too much volume for them!

Scarlet

Veteran

If you like mocassins, a Minnetonka store opened up in Steglitz recently.

http://www.minnetonkamoccasin....../moccasins

milehighstyle (Linda)

Veteran

I have quite a few ballet flats that I can wear when I won't be walking a lot - at my desk, the movies, etc. I did find one pair that I can wear on my commute that don't look orthopedic - by Lifestride, at Famous Footwear. The bottoms are pretty thick, the insides are cushioned, and the toe box big enough not to pinch. I mostly wear sandals in the summer, boots or booties in the winter, and oxfords.

Astrid

Veteran

Wow, thanks everyone for all the answers! I will have to get up in the middle of the night to catch my train so I'm off now - sorry. But I will come back to this thread.

Lisa

Veteran

My problem with ballet flats is, my feet sweat and you always see the foot peds. I wear loafers instead, because you don't see the footpeds. I generally stay away from footwear I cannot wear with a sock. Booties are a great option because they are still short but I can wear a sock with them.

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