When the magic is gone - YouLookFab Forum

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Outfits Ensembles Trends Advice

When the magic is gone

Dee

Veteran

I've been doing my annual spring try-on session over the last few days, making sure my lighter weight clothes still fit and don't look too worn. I bought a lot of new pieces last year and for the most part I'm happy with my spring/summer wardrobe.

But for a few pieces, I put then on and just don't love them anymore. Even if they were a favorite last year. The fit is fine, they're reasonably on trend or classic, in good condition, etc. But the spark or joy of the piece is gone and I have no real excitement for wearing them.

Does this happen to anyone else? If so, what do/would you do? Keep, holding zone, donate?

Dressing

38 replies

Latest reply was from TraceyLiz65

Peri

Veteran

Ugh, that happens to me too often. Sometimes after wearing something only a handful of times, I start to wonder why I liked it in the first place. I think it is a combo of still making some shopping mistakes but also from expecting more newness than I used to.

So...usually I force myself to keep wearing said items even without the happy feeling. That goes on for awhile until I really seriously dislike them...then I may put away for awhile and see if the love comes back. Or I may just donate and forget them.

Well...you only asked what I did, not what was the best thing to do!

viva

Veteran

I usually cannot even force myself to wear items when the magic is gone, unless it is a staple piece like jeans. When tops are no longer loved, they go to consignment. Otherwise they languish in my closet.

rabbit

Veteran

Usually there is something about the item that I've gone off, and it's helpful to pinpoint it to avoid in the future. Is it the color that I realized isn't the best? the material? the neckline being to open? The length? Is it the pattern that doesn't feel like my current style direction? Once I've identified it I feel like I can let it go.

Sometimes I can't really identify it, and very occasionally I've let it go, and then remembered why it was useful in certain outfits and wished I'd maybe held it until the replacement was found. In those cases I'm going to try styling it in a different way than I did in the past. Maybe it's the usual kind of outfit that I used to wear it with that I'm really over, not the item itself....

JAileen

Veteran

I'd probably put it in a holding zone, until I was absolutely certain I never want to see it again. I've had things that I fell out of love with, then later kind of liked. It comes and goes, for me anyway.

Anonymous

This does and has happened to me too Dee. If I were you I would definitely pop them in a holding zone for a while. I have had instances where I've fallen back in love with the item/s in question

UmmLila (Lisa)

Veteran

Once the magic is gone, I think it's time to pass them on. Consignment stores have made me feel a lot better about doing this.

unfrumped

Veteran

Kind of what Peri said.

Analyze first and if you can find the "fatal flaw" -bad fit or fussy fit is easiest to pinpoint for me, then wrong color--then toss.
If it's just ennui, then it may be personality-specific what to do, but I would either try an intervention--create an outfit, add a scarf or jewelry, something to jazz it up; or just put in the holding zone for a bit.

cobalt

I have a very hard time parting with things that are "still perfectly good", so mostly I either (a) keep wearing until I feel I've gotten my money's worth or (b) try my darndest to find a fit issue or other flaw to justify donating the item. Neither of which is really a good approach!

Astrid

Veteran

I definitely know the feeling. I've been on a small budget these past few years, so I basically kept everything that fit and was in good shape even if I didn't wear the piece anymore (but I don't keep worn out or ill fitting things). Quite a few of them got their chance to come back into rotation after a while! Often because I bought a new item they paired well with or discovered a new way to wear them that brought the magic back.

Anonymous

This has happened to me. I usually put it into a holding zone to be sure that the piece isn't essential to an outfit that I like. As Astrid said, finding a new way to wear it can bring back the love. Angie's ensemble posts or Pinterest can be good places to look for ideas. This spring/summer the new things I want to try with mostly old pieces are draped layering and shorter ankle-length jeans, maybe flares. Last year I pegged and rolled pant legs like a crazy woman and had fun with the look. The semi-tuck was another new way to wear old pieces.

Sal

Veteran

I do know the feeling. Often it is getting a glimpse of myself in the mirror, or a pair of jeans that sag ALL day, or suddenly realising it is dated.

You could post pics here, I have found that helpful both ways. A realisation it is flattering classic, or that is dated/worn, or in one case, that despite advice to pass the shoes on, that I loved them again!

Jenn

(website)

Veteran

I usually put such items in the holding zone. Sometimes, it's as simple as waiting for the right weather, at which point I realize what it was that worked well about the item. And if the magic never comes back, that's fine too. Tastes/trends change.

texstyle

(website)

Veteran

I also use the holding zone approach. Sometimes it's just my activities that dictate what I will/won't wear in a certain season or even a certain year. Unless it's a fabric/fit/color issue I will usually keep an item and get at least a few more wears out of it.

catgirl

Veteran

Here's a post I started along the same lines - may be helpful!

http://youlookfab.com/welookfa.....resentment

krishnidoux

Veteran

Keep them for a while before donating! Don't make the same mistake as me! Invest in a blue plastic bin + a few sheets of dryer softener, and store the pieces that don't make you sing. There is a reason, but it might not be due to the clothes themselves. After all,you put effort and thought in choosing these pieces, don't let them go so fast. If in a while they still don't do anything for you, then yes, give them away, but not just right away.

rachylou

Veteran

My Target ankle pants have lost their magic officially. They keep sliding down now and becoming floods...

Gigi

Veteran

I have a couple of pieces where that happened this season. Actually, three, if I count shoes. Interestingly enough, they are all Vince Camuto, which I'm just realizing now. The fit is fine, and in fact, two of the three items go with lots of stuff and have been workhorses in the past. I also get compliments when I wear these two items. But my heart just isn't in love with them anymore; my style has changed to be a little more trendy or quirky or something.

I've continued wearing two of the items because they go with just about everything and are probably in the category of wardrobe essentials. So they have a purely practical place in my closet now. The third piece (a turtleneck) I'm going to hang on to for another season to see if my feelings change. If I'm still not feeling it, I will probably consign it.

chirico (Chiara)

(website)

Veteran

I use the holding zone method. And during the holding period I try to figure out wether I am just tired to see the item, or my style switched a little and the item doesn't fit it anymore. If it's the second case, I let it go, otherwise I know I'll go back to it.

Bijou

Veteran

You definitely are not alone on this one. I too use the holding zone approach as I often find what enamoured me one year I have a poison eye for the next, particularly if it is a wildcard item. Often after a minor break, I can enjoy it again or else I an resolute in that it no longer works for me and is time to say goodbye with no regrets.

Deborah

Veteran

Yes this happens to me too:) In fact I am a little anxious at the moment as we are heading into our cooler months and I am worried that I might find Im not as in love with everything as I expect I will be lol.

If the item/s that are not thrilling you are quality and quite current then I would definitely pop them into your holding zone. Sometimes an item like that (for me) just needs a fresh item to accompany it.

However it was an inexpensive one season trend item, move it on

Anonymous

It does happen (far more frequently than I would like to admit). I don't know why either. I personally donate those items because I never fall back in love with them.

Maneera

(website)

Veteran

I'm like Sterling. I never fall back in love with something once the magic is over. But I can see here that it's a personal thing - the holding zone approach seems to work better for many here. It doesn't work for me....it's just wasted space.

It's also worth mentioning that I tend to have a new favourite style/type/color every season and once I have homed onto my 'uniforms', I wear them ALOT in the season. Often I buy a lot of duplicates in terms of style, choosing different colors & paterns, assuming I'd wear and love them all, but I still end up having favourites. Usually the less loved items lose magic the next season and I see no sense in holding onto them --- by then I'm 'done with & over' that style. I donate everything I find excuses not to wear every 2 month. I would rather repeat outfits that I love than force myself to wear something I just don't love.

Anonymous

I agree with Maneera about repeating outfits rather than wearing unloved items. I don't feel bad about donating clothing I'm tired of or just can't/won't wear for whatever reason. I just try to move on and not feel guilty about it.

Dee

Veteran

Sorry for not getting back to this sooner - it's been a crazy day. I just wanted to pop in and say thanks everyone for replying. I will respond more specifically later today.

But it's good to know I'm not alone in this. I don't have a lot of room in my apartment for more than a handful of items in a holding zone, so I'll really need to think about whether I might fall back in love someday or not.

Dee

Veteran

Ok, I finally had a chance to read through in detail.

It looks like there as two camps on this:
The first is where there is something slightly off about the item, or how the item works with your current style direction. In that case, I can see how a holding zone and/or attempting to restyle it may help.

The second is for items that (through no fault of their own!) just don't appeal anymore. In that case, donating/consigning seems like a good bet. Unless the item is a workhorse and may cause a wardrobe hole.

For me, I think that means I need to look at some old WIWs and see if I still like the look or wore it enough that it will cause a hole if I got rid of the item.

Karie

(website)

Veteran

This has happened to me, and I usually put those items in a holding zone. I like your idea of looking at some past WIWs and deciding if you still like the style or not.

Summer

Veteran

Like Astrid, I'm on a fairly small budget, so I try not to let anything go if it's still in good condition. Usually, I will demote the item to a different section of the wardrobe, or I'll put it to one side for a while and try remixing it later. Only if I really can't make it work will I pass it on, but, luckily, it doesn't happen too often.

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Oh boy, do I know this feeling, and I feel guilty whenever it happens! For me, there is no easy answer. Sometimes I hang onto it and put it in the holding zone; other times I just know I'm done with it, especially if it's a trendier item. I tend to hang onto things that were more expensive, are either more classic/timeless or more unique, or to which I have some weird sentimental attachment. Yeah, it's a problem. I'm glad we have plenty of storage space, but I would really like to have a bit less in my closets.

Helena

Veteran

Dee, are they statement pieces, or more basic/essential type pieces? If statement, then perhaps you are over them, but if they are more basic/essential, I might suggest rethinking their role ... They may not be "love" pieces but possibly they would be good base pieces for a new love!

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