Some new year musings - YouLookFab Forum

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Some new year musings

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

We have had a couple of weeks of on and off house guests and I have not really been able to reflect, but all the interesting year end posts have inspired a few thoughts.

1. My tastes have gotten more expensive. Or, probably more accurately, the price of second hand has gone up and seller knowledge has grown. I am not mad about it, but I do have to reevaluate my purchasing strategy when I am no longer guaranteed a profitable resale if an item does not work out. And I find it very difficult to predict which items will be closet successes. So perhaps I am approaching the boat of most of us. I think I might need to start a shopping list!

2. As I get older I appreciate more and more the conventional wisdom about things like pearls and avoiding black near the face. If you know you know .

3. My daughters are turning 18 in a couple of weeks and graduating high school this year. My son is 20 and graduating university. All three will be drafted into the army sometime in the Autumn. So three graduations, three adult kids, three uniforms, and I am a bit stunned. Not sure what this means for my sense of self, but we shall find out.

My selfie game is flagging now that I am not reliably in front of a mirror but here are a couple of recent shots in other people's mirrors. Thanks for looking and any comments very much appreciated.

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Dressing

31 replies

Latest reply was from Jaime

Sally

Veteran

Wow those are a couple of really stylish outfits. Are they thrifted? I love the cuffed jeans in pic one and the orange coat in pic 2.
Like you I am finding thrift shopping more expensive but I don't just shop thrift for the price, so I do often go to more expensive charity shops or recycle boutiques. But I find I need to be more selective in what I buy and sometimes that means going for new items.

Runcarla

Veteran

Wow! These are two seriously good outfits, Jaime. I think you’ve tweaked your hair? A little tighter on the sides? Very sharp.♥️

I’ve had an excellent year thrifting, but only thrift for myself. There are still a few legit charity shops where a deal can be had, but the curated pop ups are definitely a ‘thing’ in my community. I give them a browse, and prices seem fair - but I’m sticking with the charity shops.

Thrift additions for 2022 below. Prices from $8 to $35 per item.

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jussie

Veteran

Lovely outfits. That orange colour is nice on you. I admire how you find so many great pieces at thrift; it must make for a unique and interesting wardrobe! All the best in the new year.

Jenni NZ

Veteran

Interesting thoughts about your family. Sense of self may take something of a battering, in my experience. When they leave home they leave a gap, but then we have all ours back again currently, some in next door house, and it feels a real blessing to be able to house them like that for now. Housing is so expensive here.
As far as clothing, yes, we went to the for-profit second-hand store recently looking for yellow items for myself and Neil for the Haldi ceremony mid-year and were rather surprised at the prices. The charity thrift stores are still cheaper.
There is a lot of information available online about clothing brands and I suppose secondhand is more desirable for sustainability reasons these days, to more people?
Love your outfits. I personally find the bags a bit large? Just for my taste?

slim cat

Veteran

Great outfits! The hair is more gorgeous than ever !

Sal

Veteran

You look stylish. Love orange on you!

You are at a similar stage to me in terms of children and graduations. We don’t have the military service here though - that will be an adjustment. I don’t have advice except to keep busy and say yes - that’s what I have been told.

My second hand purchases this year were all from curated second hand shops. They have all been good additions of quality pieces- but I paid $60 to $90 for each….

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unfrumped

Veteran

I think you always look very chic and sharp! Wishing the best for you and your kids’ next phases.

I wish there were more good second hand shops nearby. Several have closed in past few years. Before retirement I didn’t have much time to make frequent visits and sort through things for random scores, then, pandemic, and closings. I would mostly look for treasure hunt of finding something with
details of construction or fabrics no longer found in usual retail. Or, for an item from recent past seasons of regular brand that was still in my style preference , or maybe a color I hadn’t known about.

Suz

(website)

Veteran

Oh, I love the hair! It's tighter on the sides, no? Both edgy and elegant, especially with the coats. Love the earrings in #2, also, and the boots in #1. Tell us more!

On the life transitions...it cannot be easy to watch one's children head off to military service. My stepson's large family have taken various routes (some in military proper and some in community service) and for most it has worked out well and they have not entirely flown the coop -- they seem to move in and out. Nevertheless, there is no question that this is a major transition for all, and will mean a very changed atmosphere at home. One of my friends has a daughter heading just two hours down the road to university and she is freaking out!

Your reflections on thrifting are so interesting. I find I can't meet with success at true thrift here (or I haven't, thus far) but do have some success (or did, in Vancouver) with consignment, which of course is much more expensive. One of my goals this year is to head out to the consignment shops in this city, which I have yet to visit. I have visited a few thrift locations and was less than thrilled. It is so location-specific, though! I'm also curious about possibly reselling a few items I would otherwise donate. But it seems as if the returns on this are so low these days, I wonder if I should bother!

Kate

Veteran

Your hair looks super, and I love that deep coral color coat on you. The jeans in the first pic look fab.

We only have one consignment shop that I know of in my immediate Capitol Hill neighborhood, and it is very expensive. In years past, I have consigned there, but only shopped there a couple of times, with no luck.

MsMaven

Veteran

You look great in both outfits and you look happy. I like your hair.

When my two boys went off to college--different directions--they were both back to meet up 3 weekends later. What? We thought they were gone for the semester. College meant frequent visits home. I look back with happy thoughts on those days.

I've never had much success with second hand shopping, and have to admit I haven't done much for a long time. Part of the reason is because I am (well, I was) tall, and it was always harder to find things proportioned right. I do like reading about your successes in finding great items.

Bijou

Veteran

Jaime, you have a distinctive personal style, that is very chic and always interesting. I hope 2023 is a good year for you and your family. Whilst times of transition can be tough, often there is a silver lining to the change. I know once I moved out of home, I became a better friend to and more appreciative of my parents.

Jessikams

(website)

Veteran

Happy new year and congrats on the kids’ milestones! Here in Taiwan, the appropriate length of time for compulsory military service is a hot topic. Israel’s model is obviously a great example of what a small nation can do to become a powerhouse in that arena.

Anyway you’re looking great and thank god YOU won’t have to wear a uniform! We would miss your outfits.

pirouette

Veteran

Both outfits are lovely. Your hair is really stylish looks great. My favourites are the cuffed jeans and black coat. We are empty nesters for the last few years snd it is a big adjustment but it’s a new exciting phase in your life .I really enjoy your posts . I wish you a happy and healthy 2023.

kkards

Veteran

I don’t have any kids so no direct experience there, just what I’ve observed from the outside, but I can I again it would impact all parts of your life, from the deep philosophical to the mundane how much do I actually need to cook.

YLF, love the deep cuff in #1 and the orange in #2 is fab

Janet

(website)

Veteran

Agreed with all the comments on how great your hair is looking, and how beautifully you cultivate your style with these thrifted pieces! The orange coat is so good.

I don’t have much luck thrifting, I do find an occasional piece at the consignment shop near me (where I mostly sell stuff rather than buy). It always seems the best stuff is not my size, and a lot of it is just too conservative (this particular area skews traditional/preppy — the higher-end things tend to be St John and the like).

I hear you on feeling a change as the kids reach these milestones. My stepsons are now in their 30s, and the youngest and his wife are now planning for kids. Gulp! I’m not ready for that role in my life yet! But still, thrilled for them when it happens. It’s just crazy how fast it all goes. When I met my husband, those boys were 6 and 8. *shaking head in disbelief*

Minaminu

Veteran

Fab outfits and hair, as always! The orange coat is a nice surprise, it's a great colour and makes the outfit fun and sharp! It sounds like 2023 will be a year of adjustments and hope that it will bring some positive outcomes for you.

I am still learning about thrifting and have made quite a few errors last year with preloved purchases, all lessons learnt for 2023! I had some luck with 2 tops, must learn to learn the description and ask more questions prior purchase!

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Star

Veteran

Sharp outfits Jaime! YLF x 2.

UmmLila (Lisa)

Veteran

Gorgeous looks. I love the bright coat. Happy new year!

Anonymous

That! Coat!!! Happy New Year

Dee

Veteran

Love your cascade of curls, and you look wonderful in both outfits, especially that bold colour coat. You’ve got great style.
I’ve been to our local second hand stores recently, and the pickings aren’t as good as I remember, perhaps more people are selling their better stuff online.
And yes, where does the time go? Once our children were babies and now they’re off into the world and we will have to adjust again.
Looking forward to what you’ll present us with in 2023.

LJP

Veteran

Happy New Year Jaime! My eye went straight to your hair - love the new but - and the great fit of your jeans. I can't imagine sending 18 year olds off to military service - that's so young! But I know it's part of Israeli life. Lots of adjustments ahead for you - hang in there!

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

Thank you all! I really appreciate your support regarding the kids although I should clarify - it is not at all clear my kids are actually leaving the house. The situation of being drafted is a bit complicated, but it is quite normal to have day jobs and live at home. I will know more about DDs in the next few months. DS has a job already and will gone for training but then home for a while at least.
Sally everything I am wearing in both pictures is second hand - some consignment some charity shop. The jeans are old J Brand boyfriend jeans that I cuffed up.
Runcarla - Amazing finds! I am still finding good stuff at charity shops, but I am tempted more and more by specific, and more expensive, consignment.
jussie, Actually I think the coat is more of a salmon than exactly orange. I used to think it is pink but seeing it hanging next to some other pink things makes me rethink!
Jenni NZ - Wonderful that you have your kids nearby! I do sometimes think my bags are a bit big but I like to stuff a lot in them .
slim cat - Thank you for the hair compliment - I'm due for a haircut actually!
Sal - It is so nice to hear other people in my stage of life. Great finds - I will pay up to about $100 for some things, but it requires much more thought than paying $5 or less - for better and for worse.
unfrumped - It has taken me years to collect my wardrobe and I had several advantages including being an early adopter and near some great charity shops. On the other hand, these days it is easier than other to find great second hand online - not as cheap as a charity shop but still great bargains can be found.
Suz - Great eye! I count those boots as some of my best finds of the year. They are Massimo Dutti and in a similar shape to Angie's J Crew boots (I think). The silver earrings are from my collection of thrifted silver. It used to be pretty easy to find sterling while thrifting for cheap. Not so much anymore! Nonetheless, I still think it is worthwhile to look around - there are also more shops and more people reselling than ever before.
As you know, kids in Israel never get very far from home .
Kate - Thank you! Perhaps the coat is coral not salmon .
Ms Maven - Thank you! Yes my kids will still be around, just as adults .
Jessikams - You made me laugh. Yes at least I won't be wearing a uniform indeed!
Thank you pirouette! As I mentioned above, I am not sure how empty my nest will be, but it does feel like a new phase. Happy new year to you too!
kkards - Yes, it is definitely a shift anyway I look at it. And thank you!
Janet I know what you mean. Many of my young nieces and nephews that I gained when I got married have kids now - great nieces and nephews are sort of preview grandchildren.
Minaminu - Second hand shopping definitely takes practice! Great pieces and thank you!
Star, UmmLila and suntiger - Thank you and happy new year!

ETA Dee Yes, exactly about the kids. I do think second hand shops are evolving, and a lot more is online than ever before.

Lisa - Thank you! My son will be in a tech job and my daughters won't be in combat, so my situation is not as stressful as many others, but, yes, still unfathomable. Happy new year!

Angie

(website)

Fashion Stylist

Good grief! The toddler twins are adults. HOW DID THAT HAPPEN???

Jaime, that's a lot of change. Onward to the next chapter! It will be fab

These are KILLER signature looks that scream YOU. Gorgeous maximal hair and big playful earrings, pants with ease, tops and toppers with interest, massive crossbody, and chunkier shoes! A modest and confident grace is always there. Winner, winner, chicken dinner! I don't see it changing......

As for consignment, it's pricey here too.

Jonesy

Veteran

You look delightfully chic and interesting, per usual! I love that coral/salmon/pinkish-orange coat, and your cuffed jeans + pointy-toed boots are gorgeous in #1! I can see how thrifting has become more challenging, but from where I sit, you are more than up for the challenge!

Emerging adulthood is a complex stage of development, for kids and parents alike :). It sounds like they will be moving on, yet still connected (with your own particular cultural context in the mix), which is where I am as well with my two. I was musing to my spouse on NYE that it's funny to go from the one out "partying" to the one who is worried about the kids celebrating with moderation and getting home safely.

Jaime

(website)

Veteran

Thank you Angie! It is awfully nice to be seen as having a signature style by someone who has known me so long .
Jonesy Yes, and so strange to compare where they are to where I was at their age. And thank you, I actually think the second hand shopping world is more accessible than ever, and I still manage to score some gems !

eta Thank you Isabel - fun with style is definitely a bit of stability for me!

Isabel

Veteran

wow ! the looks are amazing ! and the hair is to die for.

That is a lot of change ALL at once and can really mess with one's identity. Having a clear sense of who you are and defined style is helpful .

lyn67

Veteran

Congrats for your smart and beautiful grown up children!!!(and yes, how did that happen-to grow up like that in a minute????!!!) +I now want a coat in a color!---(and your hair...of course:-))

Olive Green

Veteran

You look so adventurous in the first photo. It hits a bunch of utilitarian nomad high points, as if you and the stylish humongous bag and the sharp hair, coat, and boots are all going to hop a plane to some interesting place…like Paris.
Seriously chic.
The coloured coat is so cheerful, and another signature bag.
Do your daughters raid your eclectic closet? I so would.

Kim M

(website)

You look so adorable! We are almost hair twins. I'm an empty nester now and have never felt so free about wardrobe choices. Face it, when you're raising a family, practicality rules. // I've not been thrifting in sooo long--their are no stores that are convenient to me right now. My goal for the NY is to get my eBay account back up so I can get rid of some unwanted items. I want to "save up" for a handbag, but don't know which one(?). Looking forward to your new wardrobe choices (yep, stopped wearing black near my face ages ago)!

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