Cardiff, where the UK goes, the US will follow in a few weeks, Covid-wise? I know our countries are in a general contest to be most awful, but I hadn’t noticed that about the virus. Interesting.

Yes covid wise obviously and l was paticularly referring to this variant.US rates of omicron infection are running at a few weeks lag behind the uk but it’s there so we have to assume the exponential growth will be the same.All info re rates etc..is available online from each governments official website if you want accurate and up to date figures but it’s only for the geeky amongst us!

Cardiff, we geek out over lots of numbers, spent an hour last night looking at population pyramids and recent charts about the demographic transition in various places, but Covid numbers don’t hold our interest much anymore. Shrug. We are much more likely to get upset over homelessness, zoning codes that limit housing units but mandate parking spaces, lack of healthcare in our country, mold in walls and ceilings caving in in schools… you know, things that people do to other people, and could actually be stopped if people gave a crap. Those things upset us, but we really don’t get the angst over the virus doing its viral thing (grief over a loved one dying, yes, of course, but not the anguish over canceled social events, etc that so many seem to feel.)

[edited] I think we can have compassion for many situations at once.

Irina, thank you so much for creating this supportive thread for us to grieve over all we're losing once again - gathering to celebrate with friends, or family, or to see a beautiful performance - these things are the sweetest parts of life for so many, and it is absolutely legitimate to feel sadness and frustration over it all being shut down again, and does not take away from any of the other real problems in the world.

cjh I so relate to your feeling towards your mother's time - I feel the same way about my dad - these years should be joy-filled and free for him, not locked down by himself.

Lisa, agreed - despite the nutters, the majority of people around here seem to have sighed and resigned themselves to just getting on with the new rules. I think of you when I am at my gym; thank you and all gym employees for keeping your members as safe as you can - as someone with a mental health disorder, my workouts are essential, not frivolous, and I really, really appreciate it x

It’s been commonly noted in the media that each wave starts in Europe and we see the same pattern a bit later here in NA. Maybe more notable for us living here because we’re trying to see what’s coming. And maybe an oversimplification, but definitely a media trope.
https://amp.theguardian.com/co.....ica-denial

Helena, was that directed at me? As I stipulated at the end of my comment, we certainly do have compassion for people who have gotten the disease or lost people to it (news flash: being homeless, lacking medical care, or working in an “essential” job make one more vulnerable to it, and schools that are literally falling apart are unlikely to be able to adapt to distance learning or spacing, so kids fall even further behind). The thing we don’t feel is the UMC doom, despair and catastrophising when others are going through actual catastrophes.

It’s not that things are going according to plan for us; they aren’t. We moved to a different continent so we could explore it my son’s last bit of high school; that didn’t happen, but we’ve got a roof over our head, he is safe and sound and absorbing German/Berliner mentalities and we are making plans for someday. My friend & I were just starting to talk about him coming to visit when this got started. Now he’s got cancer, has had surgery, and I don’t know how how strong he’ll be. But for heaven’s sake, we get to see each other, he’s been able to get the medical care he needs and has coverage that lets him recover at home and return to work when ready. That’s a hell of a lot better off than many. My sister was able to get her precancerous areas removed quickly; many don’t have regular exams that would have detected it. And on and on. My nieces have half their classes online, but are advancing in their educations—one starts an engineering grad program in the fall. I need strength training to counteract my Hashimoto (building muscle increases metabolism) and physical exercise combats my depression and memory loss issues; when gyms were closed I learned new ways of working out at home and paid a physical therapist/professional trainer (multiple certifications) for regular private workouts. Things aren’t great but we are not doing so badly, and are not gnashing our teeth.

Jules, interesting. I hadn’t heard that trope over here, but I do know US numbers are much higher than here.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CX.....=copy_link

Nvm time to take a break

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Thank you again Irina, and sorry if I derailed the conversation xx.

Thanks Helena. From your previous comment, I wasn’t sure you saw the connection—seemed you were juxtaposing them. I’m very concerned about factors like those that are in fact making life & Covid much more difficult for many people. In our own lives, we feel very fortunate.

Stag, I’m glad you personally are not experiencing “the angst over the virus” . Please, respect the feelings of others.
I can not be less concerned about this huge new wave of Covid that is taking over the world just because there are some other serious problems in our country. The high rate of infection means that a lot of people will get sick, die or suffer long lasting effects on their health or mental state despite having “roofs over their heads” and good medical care.
I chose to quit pool, they are still open here, I want to do everything possible to minimize the risk to my family.
Cancelled activities aside, as said before, I worry about my family members that are once again must be extremely careful and lucky not to get sick.

Irina, thank you for the perspective shown here. It is sorely missing in many media and social media (is there a difference any more?) posts these days.
My son didn’t get a chance to have a convocation ceremony after 10 years of school. Sad but not devastating. My husband lost a colleague to Covid-19 and that is devastating.

I think it is important to recognise everyone's emotional reaction to the different stages of the pandemic is subjective and it is unfair to invalidate how someone is feeling because another is suffering through worse. I believe most people need time to process the changes brought about by omicron and I appreciate the compassion shown within this thread.

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Some people are “over it” and some are not. For me, this is the difficult part at this point in the pandemic. Because we are all different and the negotiating between the various groups (my extended family, all vaxxed and boosted and ready to move on) is adding more stress on a micro level beyond the bigger picture. Having experienced illness with one of my children for many years, I have no desire to “move on” at this point and potentially watch the ones I love get sick…meaning I will always be risk-averse, maybe due to PTSD because of those years. So big, extended family gatherings feel unsafe to me. I am likely in the minority but I am coming to terms with that. I’ve decided no one will care about me and mine more than I will, and with that comes some hard decisions for which I am being criticized for.

(All those “test the morning of” and “avoid unnecessary risks” before a party are unrealistic in the real world, when rapid tests in the U.S. cost $25 a pop if you can even find them, and people are going to work, school, etc.)

I hope I haven’t offended anyone with my thoughts…looks like the thread got touchy earlier, and I didn’t catch up with it before typing my words.

Appreciate this space for the understanding from women all around the world.

Aquamarine, I'm sorry you are being criticized for what sound like very understandable concerns and decisions! Frustrating and stressful no doubt, but glad you are honouring yourself and your immediate family first and foremost. I absolutely agree caring for a sick loved one is a traumatic experience, and throwing covid on that is a terrible and anxiety inducing burden.

Thank you Helena…you are always so understanding and gracious in your responses. Truly, we need to “walk a mile in someone’s shoes” before judging. I am a work-in-progress too and as guilty as the next person!

Aquamarine - I understand how you feel and agree on all points .

And as one who mentioned disappointment in the cancellation of a holiday party , “angst” is not part of it . Disappointment represents frustration and concern and maybe even worry for all the pandemic has done and continues to do . This is not a competition about whose worry is more important .

Agree, Lisa. We just missed a wedding of a very good friend in an area of the country with overwhelmed hospitals, and also a huge family gathering on my husband’s side (he hasn’t seen his family in 2 years). We are frustrated, sad and disappointed for all of it.

I opened this thread to vent my own frustration and invited anyone to share their feelings and situation.This is not a place to judge each other emotions. We are all tired and dealing with this as best as we can. It is heart warming to me to see that we are very reasonable and responsible group of people - we are protecting ourselves, our families and consequently our healthcare systems.

I am so sad Omicron is hitting so quickly. It is a blow for everyone - especially the vulnerable - but for all of us as we deal with the uncertainty ahead. NZ has been out of sync recently - we were in lockdown whilst the Northern Hemisphere was having less restrictions - but Omicron is at our border and at some point it will sneak through.

I am sad for older people, and for families divided, and for students and workplaces that continue to be affected. It’s not the only sad thing in the world - but the worst affected are the physically, socially and economically vulnerable.

Irina, I agree -- we are all tired and dealing with this as best we can. To deny the disappointment and frustration and fear and sorrow won't help the situation. Sometimes we need to say it. This is terrible. What seems like a teeny tiny setback or non-issue to one person can be a serious emotional or physical or financial blow to another. And truthfully? Most of us—even the luckiest and richest and most sheltered—have dealt with both the major and the minor setbacks during this pandemic.

I don't know a single person who hasn't suffered mightily over the last two years. Who hasn't sacrificed something important or lost someone they loved (due to death or fundamental disagreements) or had to do without something they treasured or suffered worse health themselves. Whether the suffering was caused by the pandemic or just ("just"!!) exacerbated by it, it's there and it's real.

Yes, I believe in focusing on the small joys and putting one foot in front of the other and I'm doing that, and it has kept me sane. And yes, I know I'm fortunate compared to most. I can still wake up on the darkest day of the year and acknowledge: It's dark. So dark.

So beautifully said, Suz. Thank you.

Suz, you just articulated what I logged back in to say, so much more elegantly than I would have. Thank you. We are now debating whether to cancel our NYC trip, which we have been excited about for months. I know it’s not a hardship problem, but I’m feeling depressed this morning. You see, it’s not just about our trip. It’s about the cousin who died of Covid because that whole branch of the family refuses to get the vaccine, it’s about my friends’ teens who are struggling emotionally, it’s about worry over our elderly neighbors, it’s about people who have lost jobs and health and loved ones because of this pandemic. A small personal loss heaped on top of all the empathies and grief of the last two years can feel like the last straw.

I’m so f***ing sick of this. I’m angry with the people who spread anti-science and distrust of the medical community, who have exacerbated the problem. And the emotional whiplash of feeling like there’s light at the end of the tunnel, only to be confronted with another wave, is so wearying.

I try to stay positive, but today I’m not having an easy time of that.

I am torn because I want to get back to life, and my risk profile is low. My husband and I are boosted and I expect to get covid sometime, especially because it will be going endemic. It’s not reasonable to ever expect not to get it, if I want to have a life again. I believe covid isolation hastened my mom’s passing, but she has already isolated herself a lot even before that. I am concerned about people’s mental health and on-covid health being made worse by all this.

Beautiful points here to which I will only add one thought and then zip it ... that I know many of us are engaged, either through our work or our spare time or our families or whatever - in fighting the good fight in terms of societal justice in all its forms - and that I think having space to vent one's own fears, frustrations and concerns actually frees up more energy, gratitude and compassion to continue to do so. Put your own oxygen mask on first and all that ... thanks for the oxygen, Irina and everyone. Sending huge love, hugs and support to you all xoxox

Well said, Helena. Thank you.

And sending support and light to all.

Thank you RoseandJoan, Irina, Suz, Helena, and others for your thoughtful and compassionate comments. Everyone is going through, or has gone through something stressful, or very stressful during what is two years of global pandemic - even when they are not quick to share about it. Things are tough and sad everywhere.

Let the compassion, generosity, thoughtfulness, sensitivity, support and goodwill continue to flow because it helps on all sorts of levels. Stay safe everyone!

It’s rough. Just rough, Feelings range from anger to deep sadness.

Yes, Barbara Diane. That sums up the emotions so well.

We’ve canceled our NYC trip, and I’m so disappointed. We had outfits chosen and ready to pack, a weeks worth of restaurant reservations made, and Broadway tickets for American Utopia. Plus, one of two parties we were to attend last night got canceled so we bailed on the second one as well. There goes all of my festive attire plans. I’m glad we at least got to have a couple of holiday dinners with family members.

I barely got out of softclothes yesterday. Mostly sat on the couch and watched what turned out to be a depressing day of streaming movies/shows (NB: The Unforgiven and Mayor of Kingstown are both good, but perhaps not the best choices when one is already feeling down in the dumps).

I’m just piggybacking on the venting here, so please forgive my whine. Ours is certainly a first world problem, but it really does take a toll to have Christmas plans shattered two years in a row, when one already struggles with sad anniversaries and depression at the holidays — this weekend marked the 30th anniversary of my father’s passing and it aches every year, and other more recent losses (my mom, 13 years ago, my dear friend two years ago, even our pugs) all seem to feel more acute now as well.

So when we are encountering anyone who seems to be having a hard time — anytime of year really, but especially now — let’s try to remember that we don’t know their full story. Even people who seem to have good physical health and financial resources have struggles that hurt. A little kindness goes a long way.

I am sending good vibes and love to all of you who are feeling sadness, worry, and anger.